I'm shorter than almost every single one of my peers and they use this so many times. I just want a good comeback that'll shut them up because they overuse this so often every time i try to voice my opinion on something
What's a good comeback for "What was that, I couldn't hear you from down there"?
"That's where your brain is" might work better
“He’s got his head so far up his ass” is a pretty common saying already though. If it weren’t already a thing brain would make more sense
"Hes so far up his own ass he cant breathe anymore" - Gordon Ramsay
*edit spelling mistake
Say "muckin mick makes you meff" when they say "what" you say " I said sucking dick makes you deaf, you cant hear?"
Your username 💀
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6d
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6d
Yes I made the mistake of confusing Allah and muhammed, apologies. Statement stands for Muhammad.
Non-religious guy here, who likes to study religion for fun. Jesus was the son of God, and in Islam Jesus is a prophet like Moses (who is the second most mentioned prophet in the Koran) and (you can check this out yourself), Muslim end times have Jesus and Mohammed coming back to life (Jesus is 32 years old, the age when he died) and they will rule over the most prosperous period of humanity together, until they die, and then it will be the beginning of the end of the world. (I hope I got that right)
Odd fact: where Mohammed is buried, is also an empty grave that belongs to Jesus, where he will be buried after he dies.
Also, since they are all Abrahamic religions, they all have the same universal, omnipotent, supernatural entity of the same God. The God of Abraham. He’s just called different things depending on the language. So how I see it, is like a trilogy. Part one is Judaism, part two is Christianity, and part three is Islam. And things like Mormonism (Jesus came to the americas and teaching the Bible to the natives) those are the spin off nobody wanted. Of course there are some major differences with the religions, but at their core, Abraham and God is are still at the center.
I find it so weird when people say people like “my god is different than your god” because they are exactly the same God. I hear a lot of republicans “Christians” saying that the god of the Muslims is evil or some shit like that, and I’m always shaking my head going “you’re insulting your own god!” If the Muslim end times are true, it will be hilarious watching the faces of racists as two middle eastern guy ruling the world. And Jesus won’t be the Jesus republicans think he is! 😅
If I made any mistakes, someone please correct me.
The Abrahamic religions are just regionalised re-releases of the same album
Lmaoooo The Quaran (Taylor’s Version)
Allahu Akbar brother.
This is TOO GOOD to waste on those nobbs.
I had to double take because I translated your comeback in my head as, "sorry you cant hear over me sucking your dick?"
"I know you like thinking of me down there a lot. But for the LAST time im NOT going down on you!"
Sksks
There's an entire war in the replies
So you're deaf and ugly?
I'm tall enough to punch you in the balls.
Lmao
haha
At eye level.
This is the only truly effective answer here
Ding! Ding! Ding! Winner, winner, chicken dinner!
'I said (exaggerated voice to cover distance) "your zipper's down and everyone can see your mom's underwear/micro-peen/the boil on your left nut." Or something
Brilliant. Because they techy told u to speak louder, they were just asking for it!
This one has range. You can use it multiple times by changing the punch line to keep reminding them you have an arsenal of these waiting to be fired. Others can use it too when the main culprit starts again.
I know right 🤷 I'm so short, when I look up all I see is arseholes!
make a 9/11 joke (sry op this is the bare minimum of what my brain can handle today)
"I'd say the plane is about to hit the third tower, tall ass" and then deck them in the head
You’re just pissed because I’m fun sized and you’re super sized.
I'd say economy sized. Super sized sounds too complimentary.
Good point. Economy size makes it sound even more insulting. And people like that deserve to be insulted..
Super size sounds like calling them fat to me.
Once you pointed it out I saw how super sized could sound like saying they’re fat. Which was not what I meant. They were rude for saying that about OP’s height. But it would be just as rude to insult someone’s weight.
"Going deaf from all those head injuries, smokestack?"
"Speak up boy, I can't hear you from up there!"
That would make them laugh more
Can confirm
"Your hair looks like lavenders and smells like strawberries"
"Dad!"
That line cracked me up in Abridged DBZ 😆
I came here for this comment. Capt K'nuckles is goated.
Wow. That's the first time I've heard that...today.
Or “that’s not even the first time I’ve heard that…today”
Dude, there is this cool new invention called Toilet Paper. Try it. Your ass stinks!
“Why don’t you take the dick out of your ear”
Or… one of their buddies dicks to spice things up. I keep it playground petty since they already took it there. Just gotta laugh it off and it’ll drive em nuts
If they always say the same thing, ask them when they are going to come up with some new content.
"I said I can smell the shit on your ass. Now are you planning on fixing that or are you waiting for something?"
Honestly just do the shit my dad and i pull at the grocery store, raise your voice real loud so everyone can hear "OH YOU WANT SOME MICKEY MOUSE GOLDFISH? OKAY." "YOU NEED ME TO CUT YOUR FOOD FOR YOU? NO CRUSTS? GOT IT!" "THE BOIL ON YOUR ASS SAID WHAT TO YOU" Just the most ridiculous and embarrassing thing you can think of
Oops! Sorry, I don't speak Sasquatch.
“Then bend the fuck down, moron!”
I like this one
Cup your hands around your mouth and yell “I said, how’s the weather up there you fucking giraffe!”
Then you say "Looks like rain" and spit in their face
Take his knee out with a low kick and when he's writhing in pain on the ground ask him, "Can you hear me now?"
Yes... Ol' fighting...
Not terribly clever I'll admit, but it gets the point across.
I said-say what if your gay
What
“Hmmm I wanna say whooooo…is it what?”
A good shot to the nuts.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize you had a hearing problem. Maybe your ego is blocking your eardrums."
Instead of a comeback, maybe get new friends.
Or just cherish alone time... It's peaceful!
"Strange, I always heard jacking off would make you go blind. But here you are going deaf"
"Let me turn it up for you." Rotate middle finger from pointing down to straight up.
"The air must be so thin up there it's making you stupid."
When they respond/react to that
"Well you heard that, didn't ya?"
Less oxygen making you stupid AND deaf?
I SAID IT SMELLS LIKE YOU HAVE AN INFECTION!
Savage!
Clean your ears
And wash your ass!
You'll hear me when I climb you like a spider monkey and skull fuck you. (I'm 4'9")
Lean into it. Yell loudly, "YOU MAY WANT TO CALL YOUR DOCTOR TO HAVE THAT CROTCH ROT CHECKED OUT. IT SMELLS LIKE ROADKILL DOWN HERE! I HOPE YOU WEREN'T F-ING OLD WATERMELONS AGAIN!"
My fault, I forgot tall people don't get much blood to their brain.......
Funny, that's what I told your mom last night.
"Dick punch!"
"I guess not cuz it's hard to hear over the sound of me banging your mom"
Well if you take your head out of your ass and then clean the 💩 out of your ears. It's amazing what you can hear
I'm on average a foot shorter than most people in my life, and I can tell you none of them have liked a reply to something like that with "You know, a high horse is never very stable"
Quit going down on her, come up for air and speak properly
I dont think you can hear it when you are 6 feet under either
I would yell “This isn’t a zoo you giraffe”
"I said you should really shave those nose hairs!!"
Well, you can’t exactly suck my balls from up here, can ye?
"oh, look at that, looks like stupid rises.
Depending on how short you are: don't piss off the person who can headbutt/punch you in the nuts without having to bend down.
Punch them in the crotch.
Twist his dick
If it's a woman, ask her if you can smell her pussy. When she says "No way!! "(or disgusted versions thereof) then you can say "Oh, must be your feet then".
"Oh WHAT!? Your face is up there!? Sorry, I'm so used to you talking out your arse."
"Looks like your balls are almost ready to drop, hopefully you'll be able to drop some good jokes soon too."
Your best bet is to stop giving your opinion to people who obviously don't value it. Instead, ignore them, but every time they want something, pretend you don't hear them. If they persist in bothering you, tell them, "Sorry, can't hear you from down here." Walk away.
Adding to this, if you have to communicate with them for some reason (work, group project, whatever), do it in writing. Text them, don’t speak to them aloud.
Any further complaints cannot be about hearing you, and this approach “solves their problem” by providing reasonable accommodations for their disability.
“I say the same thing to your mom”
I’m surprised since you have your head up your ass
Get on your knees, get real close to them, then repeat your sentence
You need a different set of peers
lick their knees
Speak up, kid! I can't hear you from up there!
Just start yodeling
My aunt was taller than everyone else growing up. Whenever they’d say “how’s the weather up there?” She’d say “it’s raining” and spit on them.
I know that’s not the same situation but maybe it’ll provide some inspiration.
Well, if your ass wasn't so big, my voice could get around it quicker.
“I said WASH YOUR BALLS / TWAT YOU DISGUSTING ANIMAL!! THE SMELL DOWN HERE WOULD MAKE A STARVING MAGGOT PUKE!!!”
"SPEAK UP BOY! I CANT HEAR YOU FROM UP THERE!!"
Hearing loss is a sign of old age.
dead eye the person and say
“I want you to save this interaction where you made fun of my height. Replay it for yourself in the back of cars, on airplanes, when you’re trying to get into a sports car. I want you to think back and realize how much easier i can do those things than you can.”
In a raised voice, say back "I SAID I CAN SEE YOUR TINY PENIS HANGING OUT!"
"Speak up, I can't hear you from up there!"
Shout louder and say don't worry. They make some great hearing aids these days!
A quick, hard cock punch followed by, “did you hear that?”
Opposite here, as a 5’11” woman. When I lived in South Texas, the comments never stopped. “How’s the weather up there” and “OMG YOU fit in that regular sized car!?!” (I was skinny as a skeleton). I finally just kept saying “how rude, that’s a very insensitive thing to say”
“I said ur ankles are looking tasty and i’m feeling bitey”
I said, "You've got a TINY PENIS!"
Drop a pot, then run down and say, "I said, look out!"
Oh you're up there, sorry I could smell shit and thought you were talking but it's just your below average ass.
"Are you up there where the oxygen gets thin and makes your brain not work right?"
your balls stink
Fuck off you giant cunt
Get a hearing aid, grampa
You could quote Shakespeare at them if you were willing to be aggressive.
How low am I, thou painted maypole? speak;
How low am I? I am not yet so low
But that my nails can reach unto thine eyes
Herpes has a smell, you know
Yell "I SAID YOUR CROTCH REALLY STINKS!!!"
You're talking a lot of shit for someone in dick-biting range
'I SAID YOUR CROTCH SMELLS LIKE A MIX OF ROTTING SKUNK AND CAT PISS!'
Too funny 🤣
I remember a story of wilt Chamberlin and another nba player I can't remember right now but they were in an elevator,, a guy gets in and said hey wow how's the weather up there?! Apparently Wilt spit on dudes head and told him it's raining. I know this doesn't help but this just made me remember that story
Must be the lack of oxygen space cadet
That’s what your mom said last night
Maybe you should take the dick out of your ear.
I can find a few solutions to compensate for any height disadvantage, you on the other hand, will struggle for an eternity trying to find a solution to compensate for the disadvantage that is your brain—evidenced by the repeated overuse of that insult.
Remind them that Conor McGregor is 5'9 inches tall.
“I said wash your taint, it’s brutal down here”
Headlock knuckle sandwich might need to jump to get it started.
If you weren't so high. You would understand
You say, very loud “I was asking if you are still in therapy from the time that priest made you suck his dick.”
A uppercut 💥👊🏾
Big things come in small packages
You know, the first time I heard that joke, in Kindergarten, it was kind of funny I guess. Kids can be childish and petty like that. I'm so glad people grow out of that.............
One should be careful when speaking to someone. When their groins in uppercut range.
It's because of all the hot air where you are
Huh? What did you say? I saw your lips move but now sound came my way.
"I can punch you in the tant to send the same message"
At least I don’t make the Restaurant Owners cringe, like when they see you entering the “All You Can Eat Buffet “
"Clean the shit out of your ears and maybe you would heve heard me the first time."
Your mom could.
"It's hard to yell over the mountains of blubber."
I’m 6’5. I can’t help you.
I’m not sure that line works.
Don’t get short with me.
🤣🤣🤣 it’s the way God made me.
Actually, it was my mother. I was supposed to be tall like most of the men in my family but she would hit me on top of the head every time I lipped off.
My mother is the reason I’m tall. She’s 5’10 and both of her brothers were over 6’4. My dad was 5’9.
Punch them in the groin to get their attention first
Thats because im short...FUSED, and im ready to BLOW...your dick because thats at head height. Its sad you have to belittle me id hoped you would be the bigger man but that was clearly a tall order. Stop thinking so small of me and grow up.
Maybe it's because you're always looking up to me for inspiration.
“Bite me, Gigantor. You need the extra mass for your dense ass head!”
Must be lonely up there with all that extra air to fill.
I usually say if they kceamed their ears so you can pair it up with "I'm not that fucking short, clean the shit out of your ears." Deoends if you wanna be hostile or not. If not maybe "Clean the wax out of yours ears " with a haha or something so they think you're halfway joking. Lol
"Whoaa...a talking giraffe!"
My dick goes in your mouth not the ear.
Hook your leg around their leg, pull them down, grab their ear, and THEN say it
“Your (dick/pussy) smells like it pisses rainbow colors you twat”
I've cut both of your Achilles tendons.
Yeah, assholes generally can’t hear me.
Well.. if it's a guy saying it that should put you at a convenient height to punch him in the nuts.
"Turn around let me talk into your ear maybe your assholes are full of wax"
"Shut up, sniper bait"
I see a pimple under your chin
Punch them in the dick
So get out of your head out of your ass so you can hear me.
Punch them in the balls
Damn, it's so easy to punch tall guys in the balls from here.
I like the sound tall men make as they hit the floor.
It's easy to diagnose your recto-cranial inversion from here.
You heard me, but you're too oxygen-deprived to understand what I said.
Take your father's dick out of your ear and your hearing will improve.
Your zipper is down and everyone can see your Garanimals.
Gonad punch. Then, when they're rolling around, cradling berries say "Can you hear me now, fuckwit?"
"Oh yeah? Well the jerk store called ..."
It was me, farting in your general direction!
Probably because the air is so thin up there.
Im the tallest in my family after my growth spurt but for a while i had people younger and older than me that were much taller and i just responded with, if you couldn't hear me why did you respond to it, then they get flustered and make and sfart saying other things then i say i thought you couldn't hear me.
Just let me comment "yikes" on their selfies with my main account. 💯
"I asked your mom the same question last night"
Careful, I’m prime dick punching height
What was that? I couldn't hear you when your head is in outer space.
Yeah sorry man I was mumbling too… because I have a mouth full of your mom!
I said, "syphilis causes hearing loss"
Let me know when it starts raining.
Come here and let me finger it out
“I said ‘Tall people are fucking dicks!’”
"I was just saying you smell like an asshole from down here"
Sorry i was going down on your mom
No problem I’ll just talk to your ass because that’s where your head is.