You will not convince them. It is not because there is something wrong with your friends. Your parents are narcissistic and they dont want you to have outside relationships. Go out and have friends and dont tell your parents about it. Donr let your friends meet your parents. You are not gonna change their narcissistic personality nor convince them anyway. Even if you convince, they will retaliate with something else thats completely unrelated later. Just be secret about all your relationships and never tell them about your friends.
When the parents are alive, taking care of children, no grandparents are gonna win
My neighbor’s dog tried to come into my apartment so I closed the door in front of the dog and the neighbor knocked on my door saying that her dog wont bite and it is safe. She was so angry. I was gonna say how i know it is safe but i dont want it in my house but i just said sorry. Next time I dropped some food scraps on the hall way by accident while i was trying to take them to the food compost bin in front of the building, and she angrily yelled at me asking why i dropped it and i said i didnt know i dropped i was just carrying a bucket of food scrap and that one piece of orange peel fell out of my bucket, she was so angry yelling as loudly as possible saying her dog could try to eat it and she knows that i am an animal hater. I was like i didnt intend harm her dog and she went away. God…
Dogs used to be in the wild. But currently most breeds that people have as their pet at their home are literally made for humans to have them in their home, that they cannot even survive in the wilderness. When you go to hiking in the national forest with your dog, there are signs saying how there is nothing good that can happen by your domesticated dog meeting wild animal like deer and fox etc. There are only about 35 breeds that can still live in the wild. Thats why when you go to national park you see more of other animals. Wild dogs don’t act like those home dogs. So the whole dog thing is not about love of animal. It is about people needing a live toys. It is nothing more than a toy, even the reason for them to exist. People make those dogs in the factory just like chickens or cows but for people to play with them, not to eat them. I believe that dog rescue is BS. Because why do we need to rescue them? Because people got their toys, and they lost interest and they abandon them, then they are hurt and sick in the wilderness. If they were wild dogs, we don’t need to rescue them. Then we rescue, then the whole cycle re-start. I love animal. For that reason I do not support the whole dog thing. Cat either for the same reason.
Your mom is cruel. For whatever reason it is, if you feel sick, she should believe you and help you to recover from your sickness. She is not doing her job.
Try to save as much money as possible until you can build your fund. Financial independence is essential for children of abusive parents. Read much about it, not just from TikTok but from the library or Google. Find ways to earn money that your parents cannot touch if possible.
Please read more about the female body wherever you can. There are books about it in the library. To help yourself to take care of your body, since your mom is not doing her job.
There are many options to manage period blood, including diva cups and other methods. Google them and find out what could be good. It is a personal preference, but I found the Diva cup to be very money-saving and also better for the body because some cheap period pads are bad for your health. There are many brands of them as well. You buy only once and reuse them so it is very economical. I bought my first one and it was not comfortable but it worked, but later I found a different brand one and that is very comfortable.
Other things about managing period pain can be found online as well, but most of all drink a lot of clean, warm water. That is good for your health anyway.
Please take care of yourself even if your mom doesn't. Protect yourself and know that you are precious.
I think she wrote that she bought 2 packs of 7.
No you are not the asshole. It is only their opinion. Please don't listen to their BS
I'm so sorry. It might not be possible to understand why. There is no good reason. You know, some people say oh, parents are not perfect; they make mistakes too, or maybe they had some good intentions that showed differently, etc. No. They did intend what appears to be. They didn't care how you would feel because you would be on their side no matter how badly they treated you. You don't have to get your parents. They are just how they are, and it sucks, and it hurts to know that because they have been your world growing up, but they are not very good people, at least to you. That’s it. When you watch the news, with bad stories all the time, crimes happening and wars and whatnot, do you understand why those bad things are happening and why those people do bad things? Because of the same reason, your parents are the way they are. I'm so sorry. But please don't try to understand their perspective, how they got there, why they are acting the way they work, and how you could change them. No, you will not change them. Please worry about yourself. Please take care of yourself, and please reduce your energy trying to understand them. Just focus on yourself.
Here is a famous quote from Oprah Winfrey.
I am so glad you realized that it was just her opinion. Her opinion sucks, and it is delusional, and you did not cause her to have such delusional view of you. You wont be able to change her opinion about you, and she will never change. Please read many stories from this subreddit that sounds similar to your mother. They are surprisingly, very similar because they have a personality disorder or psychic disorder, and the symptoms when they become a parent appear to be similar, just different variations. Please stop trying to please your mother. Please become financially independent and be an independent adult without her. Please read the book C-ptsd and many books that are suggested in this subreddit. It is extremely important to learn about your past trauma of growing up with a bad parent(s). And please take care of yourself very well.
So, get prepared to leave. You might have a situation now but it is all up to you. You cant just sit there whining about your mom. If you have time to watch movie, work and earn more money in that time. If money is such a problem between your mom and you, maybe she doesn’t want you to spend ANY money because she is stressed. I didn't mean why do you live with your mom when you are 22 in a demeaning way to blame you. I meant you have an agency to move out. It is not that hard to earn money and live on your own. You are not obligated to financially support anyone but yourself. Here is the famous quote from Oprah Winfrey. She also used the sentence “why do you have to be shown 29 times?” but it doesn't mean she is blaming anyone. I don't blame you but you have a power. https://youtube.com/shorts/AaHYkpANxYI?si=-2kO93E5MNKraNDz
You might not have the fund right now but you can start preparing. It doesn’t take a million dollars to live on your own. Just start something to prepare to live on your own. It is hard to be independent adult being when you are financially dependent on your parents. As long as you are living with your parent’s money, they control your life. Get financially independent. Pay your own stuff with your hard earned money. I am not blaming you for your mom’s unfair treatment. I am saying that you have the power to get out of there and live happier life. Your mom sounds really stressful and you don’t need to put up with it. I want you to realize your power to discern other people’s behavior and put some boundaries around you. You are an adult and you can use your personal agency to get what you want.
Ugh i hate them putting their wet nose on me on anywhere
No they dont learn anything from such episode. They think oh there is someone who is unreasonably afraid of my good dogs. God I want to see what they feel afraid of and put that in front of them. I am so angry at such people!!!
Please play this real loud next time https://youtu.be/pkIeFYD1xVA?si=ZQwr2PFfCR8y_POO
Next time you go there, the dog sticks his nose under your crotch, push the dog’s head down hard. He wont do that next time. I do that with friend’s or family’s dogs when they do it, they dont do that again. You dont have to like their dog. If you dont like their dog and you know there will be dogs, dont go there.
Why do you live with her when you are 22. Move out.
Girl, don’t listen to her. And wise for you to not discus anything with her. Not just boys, just don’t discus your life with her.
Even if you owe them anything, this is not how you pay them. Paying them back and this is a very separate issue. It is very contradictory that they love you and they want to help you but they want to do something that you don’t want. Respecting your family decision is helping you and trying to break into your boundary is not called helping. Point that out. If they cant afford accomodation, they can come visit you at some other time. You are not asking for a year, you are not asking several months, you are asking just ONE month! Can they come just one month later?
Trans racial? Whaaattt
Can you just not see your father? Why do you have to go see him when you know you are gonna cry and he purposely makes you feel bad
So you spent three years with her KNOWING that she has a family AND she cant be with you and SUDDENLY you are heart shattered? I don’t understand what you thought the whole time, the whole three years of what you decried. She never lied. She was clear all this time! She loves you but her love meant whatever she has been doing! Being married to her husband which is not you, and have a family and seeing a lovely boy secretly. That was her definition of love. What did you want anyway? After three years anyone would think that you agreed to such love.
Im sorry that your family is not reaching out to you. But if they did, you would be in more problem than being alone. They might post happy photos on social media but I promise your overly paid brother is and also has been abused by your N parents even though in your mind he is treated better than you. The photos you look at are not what you think. They need to be portrayed as a happy family to the outside world so they post such but you know how it was when you were growing up. When scapegoat leaves, they need a new one. Also the golden child is not as happy as you think. Golden child is also abused.
You are wondering if you were actually the problem, the truth is that you are probably the only sane person in your family. Your anger is reasonable and very healthy. You need to go through this phase of anger, that is a natural course of grieve. You need to grieve about the family you needed but didn’t have. You are feeling the natural human feelings even though you might feel miserable. It will pass at some point.
Ya they don’t care about you and they don’t want you. But that’s not because you are a bad person. It is because they are sick. I promise that you are better off without them. The fact is that; You don’t need them. You need healthy people. Now your job is to find healthy people going forward.
You have this belief that if you do something right/better then he would change. No, you are not that powerful. You cannot change a cheater. You can only change you. Change the belief that if you do something he would change. He wont change into loving you. He doesn’t love you. That is the true and right thing to believe.
I second this. He is not a great father if he is a cheater. Please see this OP. You need to get out of this marriage. There is no way to save this marriage because it is not your problem. You cannot fix something that is not under your control. You do not have control over his attraction or cheating.
Ok even if it was 4 days she should wait. She should start worrying if it goes over a week maybe
My mom called a wellness check on me.
raisedbynarcissists