Completely this.

A guy lies about past relationships, lies about sexual history, tries to keep you a secret, and becomes ridiculously paranoid, but you're not sure what to do?

Keep reading that until you figure it out.

I understand it's his money and he can do what he wants,

No, I don't think you do understand that.

Coming to reddit for advice on abuse is ridiculous. If a guy doesn't fill a spouse's water glass all the way up, the people will call it marriage ending psychological abuse that should end in jail time, if not the death penalty.

This sub has literally said that asking "are you sure?" is rape.

There won't be any issues at all finding people willing to be teachers. When you can fire the bad ones, that frees up money to pay the good ones.

This will be a very hard thing to do, for the reason you've stated, where women will ask for vulnerability and then get turned off when they get it.

I'm generalizing here, but the first thing you should do, is explain to him that an emotional connection makes sex better for you (assuming this is true of course). The stronger the emotional connection the better the sex. Most guys want to be your best lover, so this sets you up so your "reward" will be more impactful.

It's going to take time, probably a long time. The best way is just to reward the behavior. Start small, get him to share small things, then overcompensate with the "reward". Try to get him to open up in bed, where you're just talking not being sexually intimate. After he gives you his little nugget, rock his world. Let him know how turned on you are and that you feel like his sharing strengthen your connection, which is really sexy to you. Remember, his fear is that opening up will be a turn-off, so you have to show him that it's the opposite. Afterwards, harp on how good that was because of that connection. You don't have to be so "on the nose" with it, but make the implications.

Never tell ANYONE anything he's opened up about, I would refrain from even telling people that he's sensitive. Even the "He's so manly he's not afraid to show his emotions" can be problematic for some men, and should be avoided. I'm sure this doesn't need to be said, but in the interest of completeness, never, no matter how mad you get at him, throw this in his face.

Have patience, it could take a long time for the trust to build.

Well I mean technically he's right, you did ruin his relationship because you were jealous, but let's not gloss over the fact that the relationship was completely inappropriate.

You were absolutely right in all your actions, and shouldn't feel guilty about any of it. Your partner's crazy reaction should only reinforce you did the right thing

That's what I was thinking. "Mental load" most people just call that "Parenting".

Give away or sell everything she owns. Say it was to repay all the money she took. Talk to a lawyer, consultations might be free, and they might delay payment.

OMG I am so enraged for you.

Here's what you need to tell him the next time this happens: There are 20 guys in my eyesight that would give me a place to stay tonight, and 15 of them are far better looking.

That might get his attention

I don't think you understand the "system". They aren't taking anything away from you if you're already a Doordasher, the people who really should be mad are the ones on the wait list.

There are a certain number of Doordashers per area. When one account goes away, they open the position for someone else. Even if they didn't have two accounts, there would just be another person there. They aren't increasing the number of Dashers

Yeah I say this all the time. If a woman is insecure, it's a man's fault for making her that way. If a man is insecure, it's a man's fault for being insecure

Why would you think that's untrue? Women think 80% of men are unattractive, that seems like very strong evidence that it is true.

You can't be this dense. Now I'm wondering if you are able to do your own thinking. If you knew anything about logic, we wouldn't be having this conversation. You're too dense to realize that you're advocating for YOURSELF, and I'm advocating for SOMEONE ELSE. If you knew what logic or what being selfish was you'd realize that when you advocated for YOURSELF you are being SELFISH. See how that works? Probably not, just get some help with the hard words.

Bullshit. You say it's okay because you know this isn't the situation for men. Men don't go to a club and have every woman in the club willing to sleep with him.

If he went to a club and you KNEW that all he had to do was ask, and any women there would sleep with him, you would not be okay with that. You would be just as insecure and jealous.

Side note: Have you ever noticed when a woman is insecure, it's the guy's fault for making her that way, if I guy is insecure it's the guy's fault for being insecure?

Women have a hard time understanding this, so put yourself in his shoes.

Imagine he spends a lot of time getting dressed up and looking as good as possible to go to a place full of hot women all of whom would sleep with him if asked and a lot of them would be actively trying to sleep with him and wouldn't care if he was in a relationship and who would actually try and take him away from you. They may be hotter than you have more money be more willing to do things for him.

On top of that he'll be drinking so his decision making ability will be reduced and he might even be encouraged by his friends.

Would you be okay with him going without in those conditions? If not that's why men have a problem with it. These are the exact conditions for women at a bar/club

The pictures aren't for you.

updateme

So...uh... How you doin? 🤣

But you have to include the note with the Yes No check boxes

Nah mate I think you're missing the point. If women don't shave because they want men to accept that a "natural" woman is beautiful, then they can't put on makeup or style their hair and say they do it so they feel pretty, because they are then saying that they don't feel pretty "natural". If women don't accept themselves as pretty in their "natural state" why should men have to?

Here's what I always recommend if you want to understand things from a guy's perspective: Find a single male friend, tell him you'll run his Hinge/Tinder/etc. account for him. Pretend to be him and try to get him a date. It will be extremely eye-opening I promise you.

It MAY be slightly more hygienic for you (which is highly debatable because the germs and bacteria are trapped in your hair and harder to wash away, and studies have been inconclusive), but if your partner does oral, they're sticking their face smack dab in all the bacteria and germs trapped there, and it is FAR less hygienic for them.

Aren't women who do this also hypocritical though wearing make up or styling your hair, heck even wearing clothes is just as "unnatural".

Wow. Things I never thought I'd have to explain to a grown adult.

Who does your thinking for you? Do you do it yourself? If so are you keeping your schedule secret from yourself or are you aware of when you do or don't have free time? If you are aware, then it would be simple for you to reschedule.

They have 3 people who don't live together and are trying to coordinate 3 different schedules. They may not be able to get together again for awhile. Before you say something stupid that I've already covered re-read my very first post.

Stop projecting. You're the one being selfish, I'm suggesting you be less selfish and consider someone besides yourself

How do you know it's just as easy? Have you talked to her friends? Do you have their schedules?

Things happen, you can pout about it or adjust. There will come a time when you want to change plans, I hope she's just as melodramatic as you're being right now