Real talk one of the things that finally got me to lose weight was realizing my tits were bigger than my gf's. That's a rough realization. Of course you need a gf so op shouldn't have to worry.
Seriously, what security guard did you blow to allow you into a manufacturing plant? Aren't you more like the keyboard warrior in the basement of your mom's house?
How often do you say "My eyes are up here"?