My husband and I just had a baby 2 months ago and honestly, him and I have been fighting nonstop since. It's because he is a "yes man" and it's starting to become intolerable. We live beside ALL of his friends and they ask him to go out every single weekend and he basically can't tell them "no" without feeling some type of way about it. His alternative to fixing the issue is to move in with his mother, who is fixing to buy a giant home over an hour away. I refuse to do this. Not only do I not want to live with anyone at all but there's already issues I'm not okay with. But irregardless, he went and looked at the house with her yesterday and came back home and brought it up yet again.

Here's my issues... For one, she expects us to come up with the down payment for her loan. It's $10,400. I have the money. My husband has suggested that we use my savings to put toward the loan (he works full time but 80% of his money goes toward our bills). I refuse to give up my financial cushion for anyone. Our name wouldn't be on the loan or the deed to the house but she has told us that the house would be ours when she passes (I DO believe her, she's a lot of things but a liar isn't one of them so I know the house would 100% be ours). She expects us to pay half of all the bills, which is $800 more than we pay here and that's not including electric or water or pretty much anything else that goes wrong. For two, she expects me to go back to work immediately upon her purchasing the home and put our daughter in to daycare. My husband and I have already made it clear that our daughter will not be going to daycare but she keeps pushing the issue. Every time we see her now, she is bringing up the house and dropping comments about her being able to get me a job with her. She knows we have said no. She says that "won't work" unless I intend on picking up all house work. This means I would be in charge of cleaning up after 4 adults (her boyfriend, my husband, myself and her) and her unruly, untrained dog. Nope. Which leads to point 3, I refuse to live with her BF or her dog. And then the big one, she doesn't respect boundaries. She is not a malicious person but she's very... Nonchalant? She thinks that a lot of things don't matter because they wouldn't matter to her. As in she's come in to my room several times (when visiting us) while I'm sleeping and woken me and the baby up. When my daughter was 5 days old she showed up announced with her 3 young grandchildren so they could see the baby and one of those kids parents were at home sick with the flu, so she knowingly exposed my daughter because "well, she isn't sick, just her parents are".

Anyways, I just don't want to live with her. I don't want to live with anyone and be under someone else's thumb. I love my MIL. She truly is a great person (outside of the boundaries issue) but I can't do it and won't do it. My husband keeps trying to convince me to just "try it out" because he desperately wants to get out of here. He knows he has an issue with saying no to his buddies but instead of trying to say no, he wants to run because he thinks it'll make us stop fighting. I told him I'm absolutely not moving out of here unless we move alone. He's so upset about this that he is panicking. He feels like staying here is basically sealing his fate to be a "loser" (all his buddies are 30-40yo nobodies who do nothing but drink and blow money on dumb "fun" shit while their wives are at home taking care of everything and he doesn't want to end up like that but still refuses to say "no"). He says I should be willing to do this for him. AITA?