Because rigid gender ROLES are also a prevailing social construct. I would be THRILLED if we simply accepted "Men" who were masculine and hardworking AS WELL AS "Men" who wear make-up and dresses AND "Men" who are sexually attracted to other Men. Same for women. But we don't. So they have to choose "Trans" to be appropriately recognized for who they are.
The DAY cannabis was legalized in my state, I have not had alcohol since. That, I imbibe every night to help with my anxiety. Superior effects and NO LIVER DAMAGE!
If you have medium-sized breasts or smaller, you do you. It is only really a potential issue if particularly large or excessively 'perky' breasts are uncontained. No, there's nothing WRONG with being Braless for anyone, but boys and men WILL pay inordinate attention to size and girth.
This is just about him being massively insecure. If MY GIRLFRIEND wanted to go out braless, I would get a charge out of seeing other men jealous of what I get access to.
Maybe tell him that if you have to wear a bra, then he has to wear a jockstrap WITH A CUP every day everywhere, because you don't want any women seeing the shape of his junk.
Fortunately for you, women are (generally) more evolved emotionally than men and physical attractiveness is (generally) less important to them than it is for men. But you need to get off the dating sites. If your first contact is an "ugly" picture and trivia about you, of course they won't respond. You need live events. To meet a woman and hope for a connection, you need to have your personality and demeanor up front, as I presume that those are going to be your strengths.
Also, on the more base "women as objects" desires (not judging, every boy has them), don't shoot too high to begin. And maybe see if you might like her for more than her booty.
Why the FUCK is your BOSS talking about cocksucking at work?
"At least I'm not an asshole."
THAT is why it is appropriate to decide that you have no more fucks to give.
Yes, You Are The AssHole for doing this "to" your sister.
But ASSHOLE is the CORRECT way to deal with her. ANYBODY who has dietary restrictions of some kind (biological or preferential) should make an effort to take care of themselves in most situations. Either one of you could have simply said "she doesn't like it." But she started in with "<OP> doesn't make food right." So next time, just have ingredients for her.
NTA for your specific question. Honestly, if daughter has been summarily disowned, it's a PERFECT TIME for bio-mom to take her in! But somebody or somebodies has seriously failed this girl for the last bunch of years. I'm already getting unsettling vibes from the description of her being a "difficult kid" with no real details or curiosity as to WHY. You and her DAD seem to have simply ignored her to focus on "your" family.
YOU are married to the VILLIAN in this story. And you're drinking his kool-aid. You can save yourself if you realize this.
I've met men. I would imagine that while there ARE trash women out there, men have been doing it longer and are better at it. Maybe a 1:30 ratio, to be generous.
Their reaction to your presence is a direct result of experience. For women, the odds that any man they encounter is a rapist or other predator is statistically far too high to take chances. The best thing you can do if women seem wary of you is to simply move along and demonstrate for her that some men are NOT predators. They've been taught by experience that there are enough "men" like that to justify assuming all men are unless/until shown otherwise.
If you still don't understand, you're never going to. Skoal.
And she will establish her anniversary as her sister's birthday every year hence. Why did she choose her sister's birthday in the first place? She's known her sister's birthday longer than she's known this man. HOW IS SHE SURPRISED?
She gave you a birthday ... ultimatum? Dinner with your predator or trinkets?
You are getting no value from continued contact with either of them.
Not surprised at all. But going forward, sister is setting up a potential conflict for anybody who DOES still like their family EVERY YEAR.
I was almost surprised that I DIDN'T suggest your birthday moved (in my other comment) but it occurred to me that your SISTER KNOWS when your birthday is (I presume, anyway)! Ans she somehow picked that ONE DAY out of ~60 (at least) to fit into the "summer". When you said that your 21st birthday was important to you, she basically responded with "Fuck you, I'm more important," then getting mad when you don't like that. It's also (as mentioned by so many others) DEFINITELY a "Fuck you" to establish your birthday as their anniversary until someone cheats and they divorce bitterly. THEN, she'll loudly and boisterous tell everybody how much this date brings her sorrow and pain EVERY BIRTHDAY SHE ATTENDS. She is clearly telling you that you must defer to her forevermore.
Fuck that bitch.
There wasn't ANY DAY A LITTLE BEFORE OR A LITTLE AFTER your birthday that could have assured that the "kids were out of school?" She absolutely every right to pick any day she wants for her wedding. But if it is important to HER that you attend, then SHE needs to be flexible; you told her long, long ago that you WOULD NOT attend a wedding on your birthday. If you were important to her, she could have moved the wedding a day or two.
NTA, and he is merely experiencing the concluding portion of FAFO. He needs that full lesson. It's very easy; YOU said "no, we shouldn't do this" and "I am not doing this." Since he went and did it ANYWAY, he CLEARLY wants to do.it on his own.
More subtly, if he doesn't learn from this experience, DO NOT EVER COMBINE FINANCES WITH THIS MAN.
Most women in MY generation actually made an effort to find out what kinds of effects pregnancy will bring so they'd know what to expect. PPD was right out there. But since about 2/3 of the responses mention PPD, it can't be that mystical. And even knowing nothing about it, I would have hoped that a husband would be concerned about a supposedly unexpected behaviour starting right after giving birth.
So, YES, I suppose, I WILL Judgy McJudge people who don't even take measures to take care of themselves. Or show empathy for an OBVIOUSLY depressed person.
JFC, have you never heard of post-partum depression? I will accept that it is certainly POSSIBLE that she is just a shitty person/parent, BUT has ANYBODY considered that she is having hormonal chaos coursing through her body and brain? IT'S NOT EVEN RARE!!
Sure, on the one hand, she's a shitty, shitty parent. But on the other hand, her body just built a person, and that has EFFECTS on a person. It usually goes away eventually, but not if it's never addressed.
What did he do with his dog before you moved in? What does the dog do when you are employed?
Don't 'THREATEN' to uninvite sister, with her attitude (FURIOUS that she couldn't hijack the reception), she's out. Anybody else telling you how to run your wedding can join her.
YOU are the one with cancer. There is NO JUDGEMENT if YOU leave. Your title had me thinking you were leaving the cancer patient. This boy is EITHER completely self-involved, or so overwhelmed by the thought of your cancer that his brain short-circuits and he's "frozen" not knowing how to help. Neither is good for a relationship, but the latter option could be fixed. The former option is walking papers.
I (51F) am thinking of ending things with my boyfriend (52M) after a serious cancer diagnosis and treatment. How would you handle something like this?
relationship_advice