I’m sorry for your loss and situation, I hope things get better

“Whether it’s physical or emotional” Sure beauty is subjective but some people are just unfortunate looking and that shouldn’t affect how people treat them whatsoever

You sure as hell earned it and “earned” it, those are your children and it would be more unreasonable for you to go to work today and leave those babies sick on their own, no one would be upset about you being a responsible pet owner. Hope you and the babies feel better

I doubt that no one would be attracted to you, whether it’s physical or emotional, I think your mother is projecting clearly, that’s unfortunate she would mention your looks if it was anything but positive. Everytime I hear someone being mean about someone else’s looks they tend to be unattractive, or they’re an attractive person with deep insecurities, I doubt a confident person would care so much about something so trivial and something that you’re born with. I think your opinion on yourself is the only one that matters, please don’t let anyone tell you otherwise

Yes that constantly happened to me, and I relate to your disorders (that I’m extremely suspecting of as well) I would always feel so awful when someone would even say the slightest mean thing to me or jsit a loud noise that would make me upset, almost like someone was sitting on my chest and my vision goes blurry and I sort of lose coordination and mind goes blank, and I would end up feeling that pressure on my chest, when I found out all I had to do was…. Cry? And that’s how I started crying nearly everyday, hey some people like to punch walls some people like to punch people. I would hold in my emotions and just pace around my rooms and cry, I don’t engage in self harm or hurting others, and if I was feeling too awful in that moment i just go to the nearest restroom and let it out and cool myself down after. I think without finding a release you hold in those emotions throughout the day, and without release you may end up releasing them in a fit of rage and you could do something rash. Good day to you.

The way humans have evolved, physically we became more weak the more our minds developed, mental disorders can and will take a toll on you no matter what you’re doing, a physically demanding job will take a toll on you, no matter how happy you are, and maybe sometimes you just need a little more sleep. Self discovery is the best way to go, if it means changing your routine or your schedule I think you shouldn’t do the same things if it’s isn’t helping you

Check out this link

https://www.abct.org/fact-sheets/child-sexual-abuse/#:~:text=The%20abuse%20may%20involve%20the,the%20production%20of%20sexual%20imagery.

I would hope her comments on your body were more compliments than sexualization, I think it might be excused by her with “we’re both girls!” Or “I’m your mother” But imagine if your father or brother had said anything. Her throwing you on adult men while you were barely into your teenage years is disgusting and I don’t know if it was done with malicious intent or the fact that a lot women of that generation think age gaps like that is okay but I think that’s up to you and your mother to discuss. As for your father’s disgusting habits, leaving pornography out and masturbating in the room right outside of yours is vile and those both are sexual exploitation to a minor. You should speak to your brother about his experience as a kid and try to piece them together in any way. And about your mom walking around nude I don’t think it’s malicious personally but it is definitely strange

You are completely right for feeling that way, and yes you’re right you shouldn’t care but it’s annoying when someone who doesn’t know the in and outs of you brain try to tell you how to feel, they’re YOUR feelings. I think some people lack empathy or understanding, but a little explanation on why that makes you feel that way, hopefully makes them understand. And if they don’t, that’s on them they never will

I don’t have kids or ever plan on having any, I don’t think there is a “cure” for cptsd it’s something you are stuck with, maybe a relative, partner, friend or authoritative figure were the reason(s) for your trauma, but they made that decision to hurt you. And the effects tend to be permanent. Before you have kids it’s best to reevaluate your situation, financially and emotionally. When you have a kid it’s not just starting a family, you are raising a human being with opinions and emotions, which hopefully you are aware of. Are you capable of giving your best to the child and is your best enough? Don’t think of having a child as something you should do JUST because, it’s a responsibility and a role that you inhabit for the rest of your life. Don’t have a kid just because you want an adorable little mini you, have a kid with actual purpose behind it. You cannot love someone else before you love yourself. And I don’t know you personally so that is up to you to figure out on your own. Plus a kid is not required to complete your life and make you happy, but again that’s up to you, tread carefully

Bad days are a must! You’ll be able to appreciate the good ones even more

I always wonder how can someone put another human being through something so hellish, especially their own child… I hope you’re still here. 28! You haven’t lived even half of your life. They say 30s are the prime years. You have yet to experience and learn so much. The system is fucked and it never helps hurt kids, much less help them when they turn into adults. I hope you can give life one more chance maybe get a loan and start over or choose to live your best life first, before you decided to do anything rash or harmful

Your story is heartbreaking, you don’t owe anyone forgiveness, i think the family you make is more important than the abusive family u were born into. You don’t get to sweep away your problems becwuse it will always be a part of you, but experiencing new things and living a better life for the rest of it can make that part of you feel like a sad distant memory, something you survived and pushed through. Abuse isn’t cultural, it’s just abuse, I doubt your parents would put their pride and emotions aside to care for you and your siblings, they’ll excuse eveyrhitng they did to you, but hopefully u can thrive and show them you turned out great regardless of the people they are. As for your siblings they seem to be under the influence and manipulation of your parents, and it can be hard to break from that, they were the ones who decided to cut ties with you, if they reach out sooner or later, u have the choice to respond or not, it’s your life don’t let them hurt you even more

Whoa ur a sad degenerate

Thanks, the “tinge” was making me feel confused too

Wow that waitlist seems insane, and by copies I mean- a replica of anything on paper or digital your psychiatrist took notes off, were you allowed access to those ?

Thank u so much

I get that I always either “talkative, annoying and awkward” or “too quiet, mute and awkward”

I always had a group (+ groupS) of friends but I’m not sure I can even call it that because I would get picked on relentlessly by friends and bullies both. A guy in my friend group asked me out and I said no, he started dating one of my friends and another girl from a grade below us (yes they were a throuple, nothing against that obviously) he would constantly tell me that he likes me still after being in a relationship and it would make me so uncomfortable and scared because I didn’t want anyone to be mad at me or think I liked him back, i was in gym class and had to use the bathroom the group were skipping hanging out near the bathrooms, and they saw me and said hi and they said they wanted to show me smthn, and immediately shoved me and that boy into the male bathroom, they held onto the door handle on the other side, he didn’t touch me or assault me, at THAT moment but even before and afterwards he would grope me sexually and psychically hit me. But nothing was like how scared and confused I felt being hurt like that by people I thought were my friends/ some were just acquaintances

That’s great! How long did It take you to get diagnosed ? And do they allow you to have copies of the doctors notes?

I don’t know if his new gf is aware of what he did to u, but if u are able to tell her, I think it will make you feel better and possibly inform her that he might (god forbid ) do the same to her. And some men can be really shit, and especially try to take advantage of a girl who’s been let down and hurt before, it’s hard to tell the good from the bad guys but don’t give up on finding someone who cares you, you deserve happiness and much more

I’ve abandoned or ghosted all of my friends, and I mean every single one of them, they all had some sort of faults and I was honestly done with putting up with it, I constantly let people walk all over me, weirdly I’m perfectly fine with being alone and never talking to anyone, I never minded being by myself, moving on to you sorry * I think your situation is tough especially with the unsociable hours, I think online friends is always a great choice to make, if u like gaming I mean there are always people online at every hour, and expanding ur friend choice to on-line gives u a lot of diversity, again there will be people to talk to even at the strangest hours! If you’re more comfortable with face to face communications you should try volunteer work or joint any local clubs or organizations, something you’re passionate about and there is a community for it, so yay common interest, conversation topics that you don’t need to stress about making, and fk capitalism, we should get retirement grant money at 50

I don’t believe in a soulmate, but I do believe in soulmateS, and not the usual meaning people associate it with, there are 8 billion humans in this world, there are millions and millions who are kind understanding and loving, and possibly compatible with you :) break ups must be hard, especially after giving your everything, this person has held you while you poured out your heart and seen every part of your body, it was a great experience, it was love, but love exists in all corners of the world and just because this love wasn’t long lasting doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to love anyone else. People come and go, it’s all about finding love in every person you meet. 🤍

Sometimes it’s so hard to grasp the idea that people are like this, I constantly ask myself WHY!? Like how can an innocent little baby grow up to be a disgusting monster….i will never understand. And fk the crap about the abused becomes the abuser, or “everyone has bad days” some people are just truly evil and I guess i don’t have answers for that, if they weren’t that awful I would almost feel bad for them because their lack of self awareness I can’t imagine what it’s like to be in someone’s head who is like that….i hope he suffers greatly for putting your family through all that pain

Great name for ur dog! And whoa the way your brother was described I was thinking he’s 10 years old. He has no authority to professionally train a house pet, especially with the amount of immaturity he’s shown, that’s really awful that he’s hurting your feelings jsit because you were late to feeding Sirius once, I don’t know your situation with the pet but I don’t think your brother should be the one taking care of him. If you can’t maybe your grandparents, friends or a shelter. Insist that you continue to take of Sirius, teach him a few new tricks to showcase to your mum, try being more wary of his wants and needs, prove to her that you’re a capable dog owner. ‘ Hope Sirius has a forever family with you