User deleted post
Shit, if I did that to my wife, it wouldn't be a reddit post, it would've been a news article because she would've killed me.
I was friends with a guy who’s girlfriends dad caught their mom cheating in the bar. Beat the guys brains literally in and he was arrested with brain matter on his boots…..
Yeah no that's way too far, especially since he doesn't know if the guy knows she's married/taken and it was also the mom's decision to cheat. That's divorce territory but not "beat someone's brains in".
Once the trust is gone…it’s gone. Move on bro, there’s plenty of woman out there.
Not about trust. Once a cheater, always a cheater. She’s definitely going to do it again. Time to bail.
ESPECIALLY if he takes her back. Because she knows she can do it and get away with it. OP should leave her asap
Eh, I believe people can change. That being said, I don't want to be the guinea pig for it lol.
Right? I know people can change but it also usually takes a pretty long time.
Even being single after trust has eroded is better. Divorce, alimony, heartache, stress, etc
Ngl I'd break up bro which you should do this would be a dealbreaker
I mean. What do you want to hear? Either sort out your relationship problems or move on.
It's giving looking for confirmation bias to get out of a relationship that he's over, instead of actual therapy they just rant to strangers in hopes it'll give them the balls to do what they deem innate whereas real long term relationships require the hard work at these moments
I agree but I can also relate
if ur ending a relationship ur losing a whole version of urself
I see these self-justification-for-dumping posts constantly, but I also get the need for community support people feel when they finna dump a mf
Sounds like trickle truthing to me.
Very much so
Hold up bro, don't jump to conclusions. These comments are a bit harsh.
Remember that she told you all of this voluntarily. She communicated. She even agreed to talking to the guy in front of you to clear her name. Nobody saw them so she could've just hidden it but she decided to be open because she felt guilty about a lapse in judgement and she doesn't want it to ruin your relationship. Keep that in mind.
On the other hand, the guy seems a bit pushy and rapey so of course his side of the story would be "she totally wanted it bro!" That's like the defense of actual rapists too, they all say it was consensual.
Has your girl ever given you reasons not to trust her before?
Exactly my thoughts. She felt bad enough to tell you this much, but who knows how far it actually went.
he knows how far it went because he listened to their phone call which she was willing to make in order to try to fix her F up.
You don’t know if she’s ever done anything like this before*
Up to 30 seconds they were swapping spit full on making out while grinding my guy.
LMFAO this guy knows. probably way longer.
First of all, sorry you have to go through this. Now I personally would say it all depends now if you feel like you can regain the trust and if she puts in the effort to do so. If you look into your heart and feel like the trust is gone and can’t be rebuild, then move on. On the other hand it’s also important how she reacts to this. Is she REALLY trying to show you it was a mistake? Is she REALLY trying to gain back your trust? If all she did was apologize and go back to the usual, that’s unfortunately not a good sign.
Things like these can be forgiven since they aren’t too „big“. But it doesn’t have to be. Listen to what you need and really try to not fall for the „I would miss her“ feeling your heart gives you. Yes you would miss her at first and it would suck, but you would get back up again.
Just listen to your heart and decide if it’s possible and worth it, aka can you see yourself spending your life with her? No matter how you decide hope you get better soon bro.
Streets 👉
been in this exact same situation and you never get that 100% level of trust back and the relationship slowly falls apart. save yourself the time and just break it off now, there are plenty of women out there who would never put you in this position
If you choose to forgive her, that’s up to you not us. You have to decide if her actions in that moment change anything about her to you. If it is something you can live with, then let her know but talk it out. If it something you can’t get past, then end it. We can’t decide for you. There will always be extreme ends to the story.
I'd rather die alone than go through any of this horseshit ever again. Makes my skin crawl.
Depends if the remaining details of the situation were confirmed by the guy, If yes, then yes you can believe your girlfriend.
For something longer than 2-3 seconds to happen, there had to be more interaction and chemistry between them during that night than what she described.
If they were both drunk, the kiss is a bit blurry anyway. Plus, the guy probably wants to believe it was longer than that. Still, it is not great that she stayed dancing with the guy.
You can check with her friends, what they remember from that night. Have her show messages, etc. They most likely know something if indeed something else happened.
Stay strong
Agreed. That’s honestly my biggest frustration is that she kept dancing with the guy
Bro, why u still with her bro, she out here kissing other dudes and u okay with that? get out while u can, only 7 years wasted, u want it to be 10, 20, 30?
You're always gonna have that nagging feeling in the back of your mind. Just break it off
Thoughts:
- Nothing, NOTHING good happens in a bar or where there is alcohol.
- Nothing, NOTHING good happens when a SA goes on a trip with their girlfriends and a dude.
- Your girlfriend should have put the dude in his place the first time he tried.
- See number 1
If you can't trust your partner around bars and alcohol then your relationship is sht ... Lol
I don’t agree with number 1. You can definitely have fun at a bar or at places where there is alcohol if you know how to act and handle your liquor.
OP’s gf cheated. Why are we blaming liquor? She knew what she was doing when she was dancing on that dude, he kissed her and even after that, she continued to dance with him.
Let’s not blame it on the liquor. She knew what she was doing.
I agree with the rest of your points though
This is the answer.
She was singing and dancing with a guy who sexually assaulted her earlier that night?
You don’t even really need to break up with her, because the relationship is over. This is just the first drop of the guillotine.
1 and 2 just means you are either insecure or your relationship is not stable.
There is nothing wrong with going to bars or on trips without your SA.
I go on rugby tours with my club and while other guys hookup as they are single etc. I don't cheat, even though there is a lot of alcohol involved. It's very simple.
I have a great time at the bar every weekend. Nothing bad ever happens. I'm not a dramatic little baby.
Why does she have his number?
"weren’t making out"
for 30 seconds?
Are we living in the 1950s
I'm just picturing their lips were still for 30 seconds, like one really long smooch.
But seriously OP, I'm sorry. It's hard to have your trust broken.
Leave her
Tough love. I like it
She for the streets
There's no way I would ever kiss someone else than my wife except being forced to somehow. So if you don't want to cheat, you won't. There's no "yes no maybe so", it's just NO!
Your girl is drinking alone with another man and they kissed. That's all you'll ever really know for sure. Did they fuck? Who knows? Who cares. Why are you tolerant of bullshit like this.
have some respect for yourself and leave the ho
Lmao. Going on a trip with a dude. Loses all the other friends. Kisses dude and probably way more because somehow all the friends got lost lmao. My guy is in delusion zone. Why would someone who is in a happy relationship of 7 years even put them self in that situation, it's so convenient all the other friends were lost. Why was this guy on a girl's friend trip anyway? Why would she even want to be there with him? I never have issues like this with my wife because neither of us see any need to ever put ourselves in such a situation in the first place. This is full on delusional on your part OP. Wake up bro.
Straight facts.....damn you a prosecutor or something....?
She really said kissing a guy for 10 to 30 seconds was just a random reaction? :D
The first time he tried to kiss her, she should have been done with him. Instead, she stuck around and allowed him a second try.
Reverse it. Nevermind a second, more successful kiss... How would she be reacting if another woman was shooting her shot with you and you just kept going and having fun instead of immediately removing yourself from the situation entirely and calling it a night?
Or just going to find her friends.. thats what I don’t understand
People are shite what more is their to understand. The fact that his girl was first loves means she just looking to level up now. Trust me whole picket fence life is a lie.
Bro, you do understand it. It is just a very soul-crushing feeling to accept that she did not respect the last 7 years because of one dude in a club.
I am sorry you have to go through this.
Exactly. If the other friends were all staying together, why was she getting separated from the group... more than once?
Thats what I have been asking and she said they were either going to the bar/bathroom. The girl she visited is her “best friend”
My question is, when she was dancing and ended up alone with him, who was she dancing with? How exactly do you dance in a group of girls and end up alone with a dude without even realizing that your friends disappeared and you were mindlessly dancing without them? Another point is, if he advanced on her already, why did she allow herself to be alone again with him for him to attempt it again?! Did, "I'm taken and my bf wouldn't approve of me alone with a guy" crossed her mind?
There's a lot of holes in her story, and it's either shes completely oblivious, or telling half truths.
Seems to me like she's testing the water and seeing how green the grass is on the other side without losing you.
If I was you, and you truly trusted her, I'd accept her words as is, and keep a close eye on how she behaves. Drop her on a moment's notice if she starts acting shady.
She told me she had no ill intentions or expected anything to happen, but he made his intentions clear by trying to kiss her..
Does she listen to taylor swift?? lmfao
If alcohol+dancing+club+with a guy doesn't ring alarm bells for her, I'm truly concerned for the longevity of your relationship. Being in a relationship is about unconditional respect for your significant other, and respecting each other's boundaries.
There is definitely something wrong here, it's either she absolutely doesn't care about your boundaries, or she's testing the water. Either way, you would have to do a course correction on this, and you CANNOT let this slide. You will express your feelings to her, and explain to her how being ALONE with A GUY, and being DRUNK is NOT ok for you.
This shit reminds me of my ex's sister.
"We're just sleeping in the same room together on separate beds, we're not having sex, trust me".
These comments are sugar coating the fuck out of this and it's sickening that people want to rationalize this.
She cheated. Dump her ass. Trust lost will never be gained again, especially with a cheating partner. This will happen again, and she won't regret it.
There are plenty of other women in the world. Don't stay, man.
How is it trust lost when she immediately came to him and told him the story? She could've easily hidden it and none would be the wiser.
The guy was pushy, she was drunk, it was a momentary lapse in judgement she immediately regretted and told her boyfriend about.
If anything she comes across as more trustworthy for admitting this when she easily didn't have to.
Whats the question ?
It seems like you have all facts correct ?
Im not beimg mean im just trying to see where your heads at.
My friend, she is lying. She kissed him back because she wanted to. She knew he wanted to get with her but she kept dancing with him? What the fuck? And she says there is not flirting? Lies. He had to have saw an in and your gf gave him one. Loyalty and trust is everything in a relationship and she broke both. It wasn’t a mistake. Break up with her and never talk to her again bro.
You misspelled "ex-girlfriend".
The amount of people who use alcohol as an excuse to kiss someone else. Terrible just terrible.
What would you do if a girl tried to kiss you? My guess is that you would reject her immediately. Would you even sing and dance alone with a girl? ESPECIALLY after she already tried to kiss you once? Why did they lost their friends twice in a night, maybe because they were together all the time without caring where the others were?
Come on bro she likes him
Ngl lie dude, she's either still very immature and not ready for a relationship, or she's not being totally honest about the story. Some aspects aren't adding up.
I'll just say that from what I've experienced and seen happen to my friends, girls that cheat once are gonna cheat again. You don't "accidentally" cheat, alcohol is not an excuse, and it's suspicious that she didn't atleast make it a point to stay away from him after the first attempt. A girl that is uncomfortable with a guy's advances is not going to keep putting herself in those situations with him. And why do all her friends apparently keep disappearing when this happening?
Me personally? I'd dump her, you'll have to decide if you want to roll the dice and find out how genuine her apology is.
This is just the one guy you know about. I’d assume there’s more.
If you stay with her she’ll never respect you.
More importantly you’ll never respect yourself.
Drunk actions, sober thoughts
It would probably sting my ego but it wouldn't be the end of the world for me. Guessing it was longer than she said initially and she wanted to downplay it, maybe even in her own mind. Otoh, she called the guy for you. She's not trying to pursue something with him. Sounds like she got caught up in the moment and made a mistake and then realized it after less than a minute.
People make mistakes in relationships. They say things that hurt your feelings, they ignore you when you need them because they are dealing with their own shit. It's not Disney, shit happens. Not saying you accept everything...but on the spectrum of things that could happen, this one is a mistake...but not not a massive one.
All depends how much you like her, I guess. If you are borderline on her, anyway, good excuse to kick her to the curb. I wouldn't be kicking amazing girls out for something like this, though.
Imo, tell her it hurt you and let her make it up to you.
All depends on how much of a cuck you are willing to be. Once they know they can cheat lie and get away with it, Will be much worse in future.
Oh my!
Intention is everything. Up to you. Can let the relationship play out with self doubts, contempt and resentment. Or just cut it off now and save a life time of heart ache.
Side note: the guy also asked her afterwards if I was the only guy she had ever kissed. We have been together since high school and were eachothers first kiss. She is the only girl Ive ever kissed.
She literally using this emotional power over you. Does her first kiss with you feel as important as your kiss with her? JESUS wake up and smell this coffeee shitt
Send her ass packing
If she wanted it to stop, she could have made him stop. Sh will trickle truth it until your ok with what happened. No one kisses for 10 seconds by accident
No one has a “reaction” to be kissing that makes them continue to kiss-you HAVE to see how dumb that sounds. I’m sorry but if she was really committed she would have NEVER let it go on for 10-30 seconds.
This really depends on what matters to you and your own priorities. It seems like for most of the top commenters here it'd be a huge deal and probably lead to the end of their relationship. For me, 10 seconds of drunkenly letting a stranger kiss you before realising and pushing him away doesn't seem like the sort of thing to end a relationship over if it's otherwise going well and you still trust her. Only you know which camp you sit in though and whether or not you can move on and still have trust in future.
How did she have his number if they weren't talking?
Billions of women man, 80 years to live. You had a good run. No house to fight over, no kids to traumatize. I’d say just walk.
I almost let my ex slide for this once haha. Instead, I started recording our talks. I’d trusted her so fully I never noticed how often she would rewrite our past conversations. When I could confidently tell her she was wrong, and assert myself more often, her ego couldn’t handle it and I finally got free.
Imma have to agree with a bunch of people here, leave her man.
That behavior is unacceptable. I personally don't like the fact that she was singing and dancing with another guy. That alone seems pretty flirtatious to me.
I know this is hard, man, but take it from someone who was cheated on after 4 years. You have to accept this and let her go.
" She told me he was going to be there before she went. They all went to the bar together, and my girlfriend said they were all dancing together, and lost her friends. It ended up being just her and the guy,...."
No such thing as coincidence. This was planned.
Yup. Girls on a night out typically operate in groups.
There are only two reasons why she'd be left alone.
The first is she got in a fight with them and they were angry.
Second, they were giving her space to hook up with a guy.
That's it.
Just set a timer for 10 seconds and watch it go by, that’s a long time to be “kissing without kissing him back”.
I’ve been in a similar situation and on reflection it doesn’t really matter what other folk think. For you it’s a question of what you think, how you feel. If you don’t know right now then, if I were you, I’d be ending the relationship. You’ll never know what’s the right answer but, as a lot of people have said, once the doubt is there it almost never goes away.
Trust them till they give you a reason not to, and when they do move on. There's no second chance here. It sucks but that relationship is over
Ask yourself, is she the sort of person you'd want to spend the rest of your life with? That's a long time to be with someone who isn't as committed to you as you are to her. Do you want to deal with that drama and be disrespected like that? I think that's unfair on you, man.
I know relationships go through ups and downs, but the foundations are the foundations. You cannot build a happy life with someone without devotion.
Leave
If she cheats...
I think you know how you feel and you're trying to talk yourself out of what that means for you. If she didn't want to kiss him, it's avoidable. If she wanted to be up front about it, she could have done that.
I'd say its worth stepping back from the relationship and focussing on your own happiness for a while.
Being drunk isn't an excuse my brother. Break up and know your worth. There's someone out there that will respect you and love you. I wish you nothing but peace and happiness homie
You got cheated on.
I recommend a clean break up.
These things should never happen in a normal relationship because if she is committed to you she would never put herself in a situation to be kidsed by some other dude.
Dump.
Streets 👉
7 years and she is still playing. Drop her, man. Ain't worth it.
What’s the point of dating for so long?
She went out drinking with her friends and a guy without you that’s enough right there. She knew what she was doing and just feels guilty. It’s cheating, leave her.
Tell that bitch to hit the road. Or she will suck some dick and day it was only a ten second reaction. Save yourself the bs
You made a Reddit post because deep down it was eating you alive. For your sanity, it’s better to break up and move on than to worry if something like this will happen again.
Your soon to be ex-girlfriend
You’ve been dating for 7 years and have had struggles,why aren’t you engaged or married? Sometimes a person gets stuck in a relationship,wants more, but they don’t leave due to fear.
Happened to me with my first girlfriend. Once that trust is broken it's kinda impossible to get back, and you won't be able to get it out of your head. I tried to forget about it and we got back together but she ended up sleeping with someone else and lying again.
She probably wouldn't have told you the full story or truth and that's a huge red flag. If it was a genuine mistake honesty is the best policy.
Someone kissed my now fiance at a party and I was just in the other room. She pushed him off and told him she had a boyfriend and came to get me, when I walked in I've never seen someone shit their pants so quick. He was apologetic, and she was disgusted. The correct reactions, hence why she's now my fiance 🙂
You're a cuck if you don't end the relationship.
Ive been cheated on in EVERY relationship, and I gotta say what sucks the most? Is that you weren’t worth stopping the cheating
I’ve tried to take people back after. Ruined me and them. It wasn’t worth it. Maybe she’s more mature (although I question that because who CONTINUES to spend time with a guy who hit on them? Someone looking for an excuse?)
Good luck. Don’t let this make you bitter. Don’t let someone else’s actions water down who you are
My goodness. None of my boyfriends have ever been the dancing type, so i go alone with my friends. When men approach me, I'm always with my friends, and the men are rejected or told to move on. Dancing with another man at the club is already sketchy!!
After 7 years, I'm sorry. That must feel awful
Don’t be a cuckold and try to understand what happened. Drop her dude because she is not happy with your relationship
It’s over lil bro
This is why I stay single, fuck this bs. 7 years down the drain and god knows what else she has done, cut her loose and focus on yourself.
Yep same here. Much more peaceful being single
Time to pack it up boss
let me rephrase that for you, your girlfriend kissed a guy
I'm not going to lay any advice on u, this one of those things each person has to deal w on their own
time is going to be your only friend, I hope you're able to be at peace
Well, she's not your girlfriend anymore, she's just that girl you used to date.
It was cheating. She needs to level with you and be perfectly honest about what happened and how involved she was. For example, dancing and singing with a guy after he tries to kiss her absolutely is flirting. She could have prevented it from happening but she chose to do the other thing.
What you do with that information is up to you. If you think she is actually regretful and she plans to actively avoid situations like that in the future, maybe consider forgiving her and working through it. If she is expressing her lack of commitment to you by screwing around drunk with random guys, then the relationship is over.
I’d trade her in and I’d go over and teach your buddy a lesson he won’t forget.
You're saying he should teach the guy how to French kiss 💋
Nah, the guy saved him.
Rather be cheated on sooner than later.
Cheating/disloyalty is a character issue that makes someone a bad partner.
I wouldn't be surprised if you interrogated her so much over those few days she gave you a false confession.
I have thought about that. But now she has stuck with saying she kissed him back. I felt like I almost convinced her she did by asking her so much
Ah yes poor her she was flung into this situation if only something like free will existed. The reason why women like this exist to begin with is because their are men that will tolerate the behavior. You obviously don't like it but your telling yourself that you invested seven years in a relationship to get cheated on. If the roles were reversed would you expect the same level of forgiveness or would you even get it? Men ferociously need hormones supplementation in 2024.
Or she could just be lying. Like people often do.
So this guy kissed your girlfriend while she was drunk - so her reaction time is going to be slow and she's not 100% sure what's going on - and your complaint is she was assaulted for maybe 10 seconds too long? I know this is harsh but it sounds like you have some problems with trust and control.
I've been raped and assaulted. Was there a time limit the attacker was supposed to follow before according to my partner I magically consented?
This is honestly the answer, she got assaulted and all he can worry about is this. People who get assaulted can also go into a fawn response. A lot of the comments here are strange for not taking this into consideration
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5d
get over it and kick her out for sure.
Hey idiot. Drunk people have slow response times in judgment. 2 to 3 seconds for your stupid drunk bitch was how long it took for her to stop things.
Stop obsessing about the details. And make it clear your woman doesn't drink in social settings without you if she can't prevent something like this from happening.
She sounds like an idiot.
I'm sure it was a mix of shock and in the moment whatever but if she was getting drunk and dancing with another dude, wtf did she expect to happen?
Anyone would know that's not exactly a platonic vibe, and it's not unreasonable to assume something like that is likely to happen. And she even kept dancing with him after he tried to kiss her? Again, she's an idiot.
I'm not saying you should break up with her or anything. That's your choice, and this is something you could recover from if desired. But she definitely needs to focus on earning back your trust and proving herself to you for as long as you need.
If you stay together, I highly suggest you go to couples counseling.
Move on
HOLUP - So, how did she get his number??? I mean like.. you asked her to call him ...
Honestly she got assaulted and this is what your worried about? You’ve been together for 7 years surely you know her well, she was drunk it was probably such a shock. If this is a pattern behaviour then ye breakup but this is one off and she is someone you trusted well for 7 years. I dunno it sounds like you guys are below 30
If she just would've cone clean to you immediatly I think there was a chance to save this. But with how she behaved about it I don't think that trust can be rebuilt. And it will always come back to you and the relationship can only go downhill from that.
I had a guy kiss me out of the blue before, and it took like half a second to just push him of and tell him to fuck off. 10s is a pretty long time
Sorry man
Who gives af whether they kissed for a second or not. She did it and she’s trying to shift the blame on the other guy.
Dump her. She cheated on you.
No girl has to kiss a guy. It’s very easy for her to turn her head and see it coming. Over 10 seconds is obviously kissing back. Alcohol is no excuse. Just break up with her and move on. You’ll never trust her again.
damn bro
to the street where she belongs.
Did D go into V? If not i see no reason for this post
She stayed after her tried to kiss her once. She has no respect for you. Stay with her only if you like the idea of being cucked eventually.
Run for the hills.
Given that you didn't believe her when she said a dude tried to kiss her but she rejected him you didn't even trust her before this happened. This relationship was dead anyway.
Break up, break up! Trouble down the line, is what I see.
Ex-gf, she rejected him but when she did kiss him it was for 10 secs? That's pretty much making out, pretty much cheated
Leave her behind. Your relationship will NOT get better. Keep to a path far from her unless you want to lose your honor.
Man Up and Move On
I'd leave her if I were you, she belong to the streets
She cheated on you. She lied to you about it. You won't be able to trust her again no matter how badly you want to believe you can. It's over. That doesn't mean you just try to move on. But the sooner you accept this relationship is dead and begin the grieving and healing process, the better off you will be in the long run. Life is way too short and there are way too many great women put there for you to waste another moment on a cheater and a liar.
Sounds like your ex-girlfriend or at least it should be this way.
You deserve better buddy.best of luck to you
Updateme
Lol
She called him? As in like has his number? Why? She ditches her friends, makes out with this dude and just casually has his number? How many times have they banged already?
I don't know what to say. But keep your heads high king. Don't feel sad or be depressed.
You gotta figure it out for yourself soon.
Happened once will happen again
Isn't there some meme or something about relationships breaking at 3 and 7 years?
I personally don't date women who drink or purposely put themselves in reckless situations. It's fair, because I don't drink either. So it's mutual. My wife and I have never had a situation like this.
Typically when I see stories like this. I like to think an ultimatum is fun. Generally I would just say if you can't trust someone -- leave. But if you want to give them a fun chance. Say "quit drinking to show you can change." If they can't quit the party lifestyle, then they won't change. And you leave.
But if they actually quit the party lifestyle, then they've demonstrated a huge commitment to being better, and there's some respect in that too.
You’ll have to challenge him to a duel to regain your honor.
Throw that trash to the curb 🚮
That kinda stuff will stick in the back of your mind and you'll always be wondering what's going on when you're not around
Better than wasting more years of your life down the road and finding out later something else happened
Lol run away man
Can't believe a girl with relationship problems danced and drank all night with a guy then kissed him. Also if she said she didn't kiss him back then did there probably more lies in there somewhere.
She denied it and lied to you until you proved how suspicious it was and then she slightly agreed.
She completely kissed him back and was hiding that from the start, so trust was broken and you basically have to decide what that means to you.
But in my shoes, I'd be telling her to kick rocks. The level of disrespect for the time and relationship/life you've pieced together is not something you can just gloss over.
Edit: Just something to think about - could you imagine if it were YOU telling that story to her? If you went on a trip, and ended up kissing a girl - do you think she would be cool with it once she found out that you lied about kissing that girl back, continued to dance with them, and didn't put them in their place? She'd be furious. Don't let her off the hook so easy.
If you want to preserve your relationship, treat it as a drinking problem. Sober: faithful. Too many drinks: unfaithful. One drink is probably fine. More is probably not fine.
Unfortunately you are in a no win situation here. I know you are desperately trying to justify staying with her, and thinking of all the good times and convincing yourself that she loves you and it was a mistake but.....
Option A: You leave her - it will be hard and depressing and you will be pain for the short term. You eventually move on and find someone new who you can trust.
Option B: You stay. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but she did not have enough respect for you to not be in that situation and she will have even less respect for you if you stay and she will (even more) likely do something similar again if the opportunity arises. In the short term she may be nice and trying to make it up to you and you may feel all is okay, but in the long term you are going to put yourself through hell.
I am talking from experience here as someone chose chose option B and things just got worse and worse until we finally broke up. Loss of respect and trust cannot be recovered in a relationship in my view.
Time to find a new gf. Sorry man.
our relationship has struggled some recently, but nothing out of the ordinary.
It shouldn’t be ordinary for a healthy relationship to be struggling.
She is liar and cheater.
Haha sucks for you
We tell you all the time: going drinking with a mixed group/ « « with friends » » and without your partner is a very bad idea. But you always brush it off with insults such as incel.
yup, the whole appeal of 'going out drinking' is drinking, and drinking, and drinking, until the thrill of doing things you know you shouldnt outweighs any potential consequences your brain can currently think of
dump her, she knew he was going to be there and told you, probably means she was already hoping on hooking up with him
She's for the streets!
Just my personal opinion and maybe this is why relationships aren’t for me. But if I’m in a relationship I’d actually like for my woman to go out with me to the club/bar at all time. Vice versa as well.I feel like the club/bar is for single people. I never get why people are surprised when people approach them at these places. It’s literally a place where single people link up and have a good time. Ik it’s more than that but come on let’s all be real. You a better man than me cause I would of cut her off right then and there. Cause boy you know if it was the other way around you’d be canceled.
Why do you trust this random drunk guy more than your girlfriend? I can tell you with 100% certainty that dude does not know how long 10 seconds are.
Ive read the title and the fact you made the post my man. Im so sorry to tell you but you already know. Its time to cut her off. You deserve better.
Dont make the same mistake I did and forgive and try to heal that, you will never fully trust her again, she did that. Not you.
Its gonna suck for a while, go through the feelings, be alone and surround yourself with friends and hobbies. Life gets better again I promise and you one day will look back and realise how grateful you are that you made the decision to leave her.
Respect yourself bro, your life matters more to you than some girl.
She is cheapppp
You will never know the whole story and continue to have doubts along with trust issues as long as you are with her. If you stay together, accept that as part of your relationship now.
Do you want that for yourself?
You are not married and don’t have children together. Both of those can make you feel stuck in a relationship, you are fortunate that neither are a factor now… but… what if they are in the future and she does this again?
My recommendation would be to at least separate for a period of time so you both can evaluate if that and this relationship is what you truly want for yourself. At minimum YOU need this to heal so HER actions don’t impact your self esteem.
Best of luck to you OP. She put you in a terrible position either way and you need to consider how her actions changed from any negative instances in the past. Changing one’s behavior is the most sincere apology. Please be sure she is capable of that if you stay in the relationship
Sorry man. Her being drunk isn't an excuse for kissing him back.
For a subreddit called Adulting, there’s a lot of middle school posts in here
10-30 seconds lmao in that time some people can run 70 feet or 150 meters and she didnt manage to move her head away? are you really gonna play this game with her finding out the details how he stuck his tongue in her throat to see if you should break up?
She belongs to the streets
Say goodbye. She is probably covering up more details. Never trust her and be done with it. She made her choice
I’d lose all trust if this happened to me.
I think you know the truth but maybe in denial.
She kissed him back; otherwise it wouldn’t have lasted for so long and she was probably at the time in a dilemma with going through with anything further with this guy.
You’ll likely never trust her again; she has lied to you (giving you the story in bits snd changing details is as good as lying). You deserve someone where stuff like this doesn’t even enter the equation.
Maybe she kissed him back because you’ve been dating for seven years and still haven’t proposed
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Where I'm from, trash belongs on the curb or in the bin...
Why you wasted your time asking her to call him is beyond me, she’s for the streets, move on.
She kissed him back and you know it man. Being drunk isn't an excuse. She put herself in that situation and allowed it to happen. It's weird to be in a long term committed relationship and going and getting drunk without your partner at a bar and dancing with a guy. There were several points along this story where she should have stopped and evaluated and done things differently.