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They're genuinely trying to get us hyped like we're prepubescent children. "And, guys, if we hit our quarterly targets, get our daily quotas and clean our rooms we're going to have, get this, a pizza party! With, like, two whole pizzas!"
Couldn't be spelt out clearer if they added balloon animals and a clown.
Spoiler: we’re the clowns for believing them in the first place lol
Oh there are some clowns involved guaranteed
Couldn't be spelt out clearer if they added balloon animals and a clown.
I'd at least respect the attempt if they went this far
Ballon animals and a clown would be an improvement over a pizza party.
You know they'd pay the clown in pizza, too. Gotta keep them costs down.
Thinking of a someone who does parties and the pizza shop gives them gift cards for the pizza shop. They were trying to get me to work for them paying barely half of what I currently make and I had to turn them down - trading my experience in my field for face painting for insecure hours, less pay, and zero healthcare when I have a chronic illness is NOT going to make my life better.
How do they not see how insulting that is? Fucking clueless!
Because they think it would be "less stressful" and they love it! They also can't understand that they already have a house, kids, and a partners job that covers it all so they can do that shit.
No it wouldn’t. Clowns r creepy af.
Phobia of clowns..cool fear to have.
Doesn’t feel cool in a world with sayings like Everyone loves a clown and hates a mime.
Mimes are creepy too btw.
Supposed to be whimsical people..but I get how a masked human in bright colors can set off alarms. I like writing/reading/ watching horror.
Coulorophobia officially covers fear of clowns, mimes and, for some reason, Santa Claus.
I can see being afraid of santa claus. He sees you when you’re sleeping, knows when you’re awake. Knows if you’ve been bad or good. Dude is basically a stalker.
I don’t mean “people are afraid of Santa for some strange reason”, I meant “fear of Santa is considered the same as fear of clowns per the DSM for some strange reason”
Like, I’m sure there’s a commonality that makes it make sense to treat them as the same phobia, but I cannot imagine what it is. Unless they mean specifically fear of mall Santas? Because those can reasonably be called a subset of clowns.
It is prolly the facial hair. Can’t see the face. Just like with clowns and mimes with their painted faces. Can’t see their actual facial expressions and that is unsettling for a lot of people.
It didn't work even when I was a prepubescent child.
We recently had a corporate email flier go out... If we get 80% of our surveys done, we will be entered to win an office pizza party. Not even get one... entered to win one...
This is how staff incentives work here I work. Customers can enter the 2000$/month survey, everyone month, while staff are barred. Staff can be nominated for these go the extra mile badges, usually by a supervisor, and they function as monthly raffle tickets. It gets worse. The prize? Available to 1-2 staff members per region per month via drawing can get 5 points, equivalent to 5$ on their site. And that’s only if you did extra work extra enough to get noticed by your boss to get nominated for these go to the extra mile awards enough to possibly win a raffle drawing. For the equivalent of 5$. And they wonder why people are dropping like flies??
How can these people be so blind so tone deaf?! That is a fucking insult
Aaaaand the winner of this month is Kevin, the nephew of the CEO. What a lucky guy, he won 3 times in a row!
So if you don't put in the extra work you don't get the tickets, don't have to go through the 1000 hoops to MAYBE win something that you can just as easily buy yourself if you want it.
Yeah, I would just put in half the effort so I wouldn't risk the chance of being nominated. They could also just say "we don't do bonuses," and it would save everyone time and effort.
Is this a hospital system?
That's what my hospital did. Every department that reached X-% was entered into the raffle. Problem is one department might be 70 employees, while a small billing department might have only 3-4 employees. Very easy for them to reach 100%
Juvenile detention.
My ever growing employee-owned grocery store chain hit a record $10 billion in total revenue last year. All the while stores have had positions deleted, hours gouged, and prices increased. My store? They gave us a few boxes of OUR OWN FUCKING DONUTS. which are pretty crap I might add. Some stores had better, one got snowcone machines rented for the day with streamers and balloons in the breakroom.
Throw a dice in the morning. 1 you give your best, 6 you give your best to create a union. Fill in the other numbers as you like. By paying you, your boss enters the chance to get work done.
Also, how much does this raffle cost? Starting with the flier and it's design to the raffle where everyone stops working to watch it...
All that effort, only to give nothing to most people.
I mean I'll still take the pizza, but like pay me more too.
Hey now, that pizza party costs the company tens of dollars! I mean, what do you guys want? A living wage or something?
"Tens of dollars!" 🤣 Oh these ass companies like Walmart, Lowe's, Home Depot, etc. would make up excuses on how bad inflation is yet they still came through for us with two large pepperonis from Little Caesars.
Hospitals do the same to their employees. “We are family”!
Red flag!
One red flag in a sea of red flags out there for a majority of companies.
You misspelled "microwaved Ellio's"
I’m tired of seeing pizza being vilified!
Pizza is awesome.
It’s your job that sucks.
What the fuck are these bootlicker comments? It’s insulting because they’re using pizza parties as a substitute for more sincere rewards; like raises.
I don't see any bootlickers. Just sarcasm targeted at bootlickers
I honestly like to think these comments are just being sarcastic. In times like these, a little bit of fun in this sub wouldn’t hurt. No one in their right mind would accept pizza as a reward in company loyalty or hard work. Ever.
This sub is painful to read.
For hitting performance targets for Teams you don’t do raises. You do fixed bonuses with clear rules.
You hit xxx target everyone gets Y. You exceed the target you get 2x up to Z.
Simple rules, deliver on outcomes.
Raises should be tied to consistent returns for individuals. Largely tied to COL + a little bit for consistent performance and larger tied to promotions which should have clear expectations of skills tied to bands.
Long term retention important you use golden handcuffs (Equity).
You don’t give an entire team for hitting a target. That’s dumb as fuck.
It's even worse when you have to eat gluten-free. There's nothing like having to bring your own food to the pizza party because they didn't plan for someone they knew can't eat the cheap, generic pizza they ordered without getting deathly ill.
You rip the toppings off and leave the base like a savage.
that's a war crime..
Then order a salad.
Hey, are you coming to the staff meeting for pizza?
Sure I'll take bacon, pepperoni, and jalapeno.
...we were just getting cheese, because everyone likes cheese pizza?
...
So you're not coming? I need to know how much to order.
I'm not coming in on my day off for children's food.
seriously, like wtf is this? Kindergarten?
I used to order pizzas, hoagies, etc. for folks at work… just because. It didn’t harm me financially and I thought it was a great way to get folks in the workplace to have a better relationship amongst themselves various teams.
Our leadership tried to quash it because they didn’t “sanction” it. Tl;DR: they didn’t like it that an individual employee was doing this because it made the leadership look bad.
No one even thought that until they brought it up.
Fine. We’d have our lunch outside, or at the restaurant instead. Welcome to malicious compliance.
And folks knew that the reason it wasn’t in the conference rooms, dining halls, or cafeterias any more was because of their management.
I no longer work there, but others have taken up the mantle now that I’m gone, and it’s amusing to me to see how it’s grown into a life of its own because management decided to be stupid about it.
I mean, if it’s getting an actual pizza party with sufficient pizza for everyone, and it’s in addition to appropriate compensation for the work completed, ok. Free food is free food.
If it’s a “hey, your unpaid overtime made us $10 million last month. Here’s one small cheese pizza to split between 50 of you.” then they can fuck off.
Wow you get pizza?
Yes. I was thinking, "Well, we never got anything. Just work, work, work. And if you're not MAKING the company money then you're out of there."
I buy staff tacos randomly but people make good money. Small restaurant and we get sick of our own food. Random food is nice but not as a carrot on a stick.
The only thing employees want right now are pay rises to at least catch up with inflation.
Not enough pizza in the world to satisfy that appetite.
suprised they just don't offer to take everyone to Chuck E Cheese's at that point.
Offering it to anyone over the age of 12 is insulting.
This is how the automotive industry works, a pizza party 3 or 4 times a year, no pay rises.
Low-level employees contribute the best hours of their day and the best years of their life only to do math at the grocery store because they can't afford squat.
Meanwhile, the people on top are debating which sports car to buy with their bonus. Have two dollars worth of pizza as our token of gratitude, "family".
I once got the highest sales numbers in my region in that quarter and received a piece of paper with a balloon printed on it that said “Good Job!” as my bonus/reward. I was 38 years old. I was even told to keep the piece of paper to submit on my behalf at my annual review. Now I only do the bare minimum to not get fired.
I’ve just started quiet quitting after being a loyal and very hard working employee to a dick who is stealing 100% of our credit card tips. He told us that it was up to him whether he wanted to keep them or not and he chooses to keep them. End of story. I asked an employment lawyer if what hes doing is breaking the law and stealing from his 3 female employees. Two of us are struggling single mothers and the other is an elderly lady who goes to dialysis 3 times per week. He doesn’t care about his loyal ass employees living a better life? Every single day I think about how much he’s kept from my pockets and I get more and more and more pisssssd off! I want to find another job before I confront him about it, but it’s getting increasingly harder and harder to maintain my composure!! I hope he gets slapped with a FATTTTTT ASS FINE at the very least and has to pay the employees who he’s jacked for 6 plus years, exactly what he owes them plus penalties and interest too! And I hope he goes broke doing so! 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
Nothing will happen to him. Do you have money for a lawyer? Neither does any other worker. The laws are all skewed towards the owners/upper management. Just leave. Let him take advantage of some other desperate single mother or disabled grandmother.
"Quiet" quitting isn't what you need. When the customer is presented with the check, I'd clearly mention to them that any tips given on a credit card will 100% be taken by the manager/owner/whoever the dickhead is, and that none of it will go to any of the employees they're trying to recognize for good service. Word will get around.
Oh I do tell them, I tell them hey leave a cc til if you’d like to tip the owner, but as for me and us we don’t get those. The look on their faces is shock and disgust. But these days people aren’t carrying cash and so I miss out on the tip altogether.
I refuse to participate in such wankery.
If it’s a reward in kindergarten it shouldn’t be a reward in the workplace. I don’t want candy or pencils or anything, I want to be treated like an adult
It makes being bought food so you can work at your desk through lunch almost seem like a benefit.
But not even a word for a salary increase for achieving the goals, right? Don't worry employers, we are not going to make a single cent more than you
I only want a free pizza for reading a lot of books. I want money for doing my job.
One of my jobs does lunches or dinners but you have to pay. So it’s just paying to go out with coworkers. No thanks.
I refuse to eat company provided food, let me tell you about a company called autoneum, this branch decided to order chick fil a at 11am roughly, free for every employee... cool so far right? OK so they did this for every shift, where's the catch you ask? You had to wait till your 20 min lunch, and it gets better. The entire "meal" sat on break room counter the entire day (I was 3rd shift) friend of mine was like why you ain't getting yours? I looked at him and laughed I'm like bro, that shit been there all day, you're gonna get poisoned. He didn't listen. Ate the room temp chicken sammich(s). Before reaching 7am quitting time said friend was puking his guts out.
Nuff said. Plus it sends a huge message denying their soda/water/pizza/ect and makes them extremely uncomfortable. I don't want one lunch a month, pay me a wage I can afford lunch daily or fuck off.
Collectively STOP consuming the pizza. Now they've wasted the money. They'll get the message.
A PIZZA PROTEST!
Idk I'm a simple person. I like free pizza as a reward. But I don't like it as my only reward.
If the department does well and everyone gets a few hundred bucks bonus pay and to celebrate we also do a pizza party on the company? Sure.
The pizza isn't the problem. The issue is they try to cheap out on the actual reward.
What about the diabetics on the team, “if you work hard and make your quota we’ll spike your blood glucose.”
Especially since I can't eat pizza
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We got little stuffed animals once.
How else are they supposed to tell you thank you for the millions in profits?
I don't even get 'hey, good job today '.
No, I do not want a pizza party in the event one was offered
Absolutely! And participating doesn’t help. Which is why I don’t.
We got a box of MRE's
Agreed. Most of us get heartburn from eating too much pizza anyway.
I would not be Happy
It is an insult to assume that all eat pizza
I HATE pizza, I have never eaten pizza, it just smells so disgusting to me.
So it would be more like punishment than reward to even have to smell them
No shit.
At my work we have pizza parties whenever feel like. Corner store pizzas are 2 for $15 on Thursdays. We take turns paying.
We grew out of pizzas. Were ready to be paid proper thanks.
For reals we know the top brass get bonues and "record profits" talk alot. Yall making all this money and wanna give us a pizza for our efforts.
My company buys everyone lunch on Thursdays and boba tea and donuts every Friday
Buying pizza for lunch as a courtesy is great and providing a group setting to eat can be good. Calling it a party or making it seem like it’s more than a free snack is asinine.
Yea, well we are getting an ICE CREAM party this week at my work. So there.
To add to the insult, we were only limited to one slice per person
We got store of the year in our region and we're getting a BBQ at work 😅
It’s remotely childish. Like 10 people got an A+ on spelling test childish.
Free food is free food
What if it’s good wood oven pizza ?
I like pizza and I like parties. You keep your sad ass outside
I am getting paid to work. If it happens to involve free food to make others less grumpy i aint compaining 🤷🏻♂️
Going to my fav. Restaurant next week with the whole group on the bosses expense. What am i expected to do, complain and nag with the likes of you? Pretend that its not up to my standards?
Ill take that slice of pizza thank you very much
No it’s not lol pizza is expensive. Free pizza is awesome. I work 85 hours a week for minimum wage and every year we get a pizza party. Totally worth it.
It's free food. If the boss gives everyone pizza unprompted because we've all been working hard, that's nice. Announcing a pizza party will happen if the company reaches a goal is terrible.
That time the company gave us gift cards for pizza if we got a score of ten on the customer survey was great. I'd get an angry customer and they'd tell me they were going to leave me all zeros on the survey and every time I'd get free food! It's a scale of 1 to 10, Karen, if you'd listened to the instructions you'd know what pressing zero does and I wouldn't be eating this delicious Chipotle Burrito.
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