Reasons why you should never hire the cheapest worker
So… How’s Boeing’s quality control been?
Howard Fine and Howard Construction. We’ll get it right eventually!
“Toothpicks are much stronger than solid wood when glued together.”
Worker: "Plumbing is done"
Wife: "Oh good...excuse me, had a little too much fiber"
(Later, her husband comes home)
Husband: "There's shit everywhere! Is that the pipe? Why is it mmmmMMMGH!"
Wife: (Straining)
"what?"
Husband: "MMMGH!"
Wife:
"Oh....ah...."
Sister: (opens the door to see the Husbands shit covered corpse float by)
"The pipes are broken!"
Wife: "AHH!"
(As she flushes, the already broken pipes shatter as a waterfall explodes out of the pipes and a wave of poop floods the street, killing everyone in the living room)
Hazmat team: "This is why I hate mondays. what the fuck happened?"
Wife: "Sorry, had taco bell"
(Taco Bell gets shut down)
Did some of the shit spill into your comment?
no?
Name checks out.
We got this crew to work for half what the usual guys do.
Hey, where are the posts you were supposed to put in?
“You didn’t say how far they should stick out so we put them all the way down”
Got an amazing deal on the surgeon that attached my eye. I no longer have depth perception, but it's a small price to pay to have a matching eye.
Joe's Discount Plumbing - because your drain is clogged, the good plumbers are booked, and you're desperate!
"I've just been overly depressed the past year and I don't know why, so that's why I decided to start therapy with you."
*puff* "Don't talk to me yet I'm on a smoke break."
U get what u pay for
Yeah, so umm, we had some extra floor tiles that we figured would be a suitable substitute for your roof shingles. They cracked.
Didn't South Park cover that? XD
"...and now these people from the future are showin' up and offerin' to do the same work for next to nothin'! They took our jobs!"
"We're in the moving business! Fourteen years we've been workin' our butts off! Now these future folk come in and we can't get work nowhere! They took our jobs!"
"They took yer jobs!"
"Too-kourderb!!"
I finished painting. Gave it two coats, just like you asked. By the way, it's pronounced "Porsche," not "porch."
And it's a BMW anyway.
“This whole box of condoms is filled with holes.”
even as a joke, this is cringe
“Is my parachute back from the packer yet?”
but boss he only wanted 25c a day
HES A 6 YEAR OLD MALAYSIAN KID
NASA: I know a guy who can check those O-Rings and it’ll only cost you a six pack of beer.
This mini submersible?! Oh yeah, it'll be fine!
Look, you can control it with a game controller! How GTA is THAT?!?!
so, how's the new Tesla truck going?