Like, I have a kid and a wife, a house, 3 cars and a dog, yadda yadda yadda… I just want to play PlayStation and drive sports cars, and collect baseball cards in my free time. When am I supposed to start caring about like the news and investing, or whatever my dad was doing back in the day? Iol
So, does anyone actually fell like an “adult”? I feel like a 34 year old boy.
DiscussionYou made it to 26? I stopped at 12.
That was my thought when I read that, too. Unironically
Do... do you wanna race cars and throw dirt at a wall?
Lol yes. Factually I want to get through the day by taking notes and drawing anime kids on a piece of paper instead of trying to figure out the magical formula to being employable and how to invest safely and crying when it doesn’t work. I miss knowing what the hell I was doing and doing it well 🫠
Open an account at Vanguard. Buy VOO. Hold it. Also stay buying BND about 10 years before you plan to retire. The point of index funds like VOO is you’ll get market average returns and the fees are low. Contribute the max to a ROTH IRA every year. 401k as much as you can, etc
Am 17.
Omg yes.
This 💯
yeah u made it pretty far. i feel like 16ishh??? all hormones n dumb decisions.. but with a mortgage i guess.
About 10 years into our plateau.. 10 more then decline. Cheers.
Yup. Im 40. Often forget until I get up and look in the mirror and go "Oh........." Then I am sad.
I mentally feel the same as I did in college
I feel much dumber now than when I was in college.
Ive come across my high school and college essays. Man I wrote some good literature analysis then. I look at the way I write know and I just don't know how I did it back then.... Must be all the redditing...
Same.
Me too I maybe made it to 30 but most days I’m certain I didn’t 😂
Between 14 and 16 here.
I do remember a distinct switch being flipped when I hit 30 (currently 39). Suddenly staying up till 2am, having that fifth pint, or picking a fight online didn't seem so appealing anymore. Basically any of the dumb stuff I did in my 20's all just turned off.
That’s not a brag…
Didn't say it was.
Put yourself in some complex situations and try harder to grow? Aesthetics fade but the second you stop aging mentality you go full boomer
Having a wife and kids sounds pretty complex to me so I am not sure what you mean by that exactly, oh well.
Homie came looking for a fight with that "that's not a brag" comment. Do not engage. We don't feed trolls 'round here.
Oh, got it, thanks. His trolling sounded nonsensical, but that’s what trolling is lol.
My year of birth decreases every time I stop aging mentally.. for sure. Currently I am only full gen Xer though.
Just remember to tell those damn kids to quiet down and you’ll be fine
I'm streets ahead on the one.
Thanks for the advice. I'll keep it in mind.
Ignore this dude, he has no sense of humor
Born in 88 and feel the same lol, I got what you meant.
lol thank you
No one can make you develop or grow, it’s all on you from here. It sucks but if what you were doing doesn’t work for you anymore you have to try something else. That’s really it
I'm doing my best not to engage here, because it's clear you didn't get the joke where everyone else commenting did and I really have no interest in an argument.
I want to believe you believe your heart's in the right place offering this advice. Rest assured, I'm doing fine and growing my higher self everyday.
88 bros unite (I just wanted to balance out the other guys uninvited critique)
✊🏼
I have 3 mental stages through the day:
I'm at work. I feel wildly lost, everything is chaos, I don't know anything, how did I make it to 31. Where the fuck am I.
I'm leaving work. Holy fuck I'm an adult in a solid position and truly invaluable to my company. I'm going to own that shit one day.
V I D E O G A M E S
No.
I feel like a kid for 23.5 hours of the day.
I love this. Well said.
I am with you, mate. What the fuck are we doing?
Acknowledging that there isn't any one correct way to live. A lot of us don't have great self-image so if we do feel good enough, it's quickly dashed by more doubt.
Or we just decided to play in the sandbox until the "adults" gtfo the way given we've been voting for 20ish years, and only recently had other millenials get into the big leagues, but they're firmly positioned at the kids table to be mocked as needed.
Did you read my diary? This is me
I relate so hard to this
Are we an entire generation of adult children somehow!? What you’ve described is basically all I do too.
I remember a Twitter post describing millennials as the “perpetually infantile generation” lmao
Wouldn’t care either if Gen Z didn’t judge us so hard
DO we care what gen Z thinks of us? It's one thing if your kids hate you (gen alpha).
But when it's just your dumbass little brother...
But when it's just your dumbass little brother...
I fuckin feel this dude lol
My brother has no emotional intelligence whatsoever, he's part of that "it's cool not to care, let's all be aloof and never discuss our feelings" part of gen Z. I was born in 88 and he in 97.
It's shit. It's cool to open up to those you love, folks.
Also born in 97, I feel like it was hard driven into my head to never show emotion or it was looked at as "girly". I still can't talk about my feelings and it sucks lol I feel like I was programmed.
They are so dumb, intelligent but just so dumb
I am a millennial with a gen z kid and gen alpha 😱
i disagree. the exact opposite or inverse actually. ive felt like an adult my entire life because the actual adults in my life were... i struggled tryna find the right words so ill just settle with "shitty"
i know im not the only one. it is insidious and widespread throughout our "culture"1. selfishness and hypocrisy run rampant. theres valid reasons behind why narcissism and gaslighting have become "buzzwords". unlike the actual buzzwords used mainly to sell you shit you dont need, those words actually have meanings that are relevant to many people in our generation.
the marketing buzzwords are not, and thats due to the widespread catastrophic effects thanks to the narcissism and gaslighting that is coming from almost anyone and everyone who has claimed to be a "leader" throughout our lives. whether thats parents, politicians, people in the media, etc... theyre all2 full of shit.
then when people started questioning "the experts" - rightfully - they doubled down. metaphorically and literally. (which is a separate, but related, discussion) hence why *gestures broadly* 
edit:
“perpetually infantile generation” lmao
appropriate response to that bs
Wouldn’t care either if Gen Z didn’t judge us so hard
who gives a fuck if people judge you. theyre younger than us so it makes sense theyre more immature, and dont realize yet it doesnt matter what people think. lead by example. thats where the boomers fucked everything up for everyone. they cared what other people think and rather than actually improving themselves they only tried to make themselves look better - by putting others down. then when all their friends left, they put down their own children because they were the only ones around and they couldnt leave.
is it making sense yet?
1 not my culture. im referring to the culture theyve been trying to sell us. i aint buyin it, i never have. i stopped watching literally all tv and video content \10 years ago. i dont listen to the radio. i stopped letting the algorithms tell me what to read or what "content" to "consume" about a decade ago too. i know its an overdone cliche and i realize how it looks but are you guys fucking awake yet ive been up all morning and im bored lets do something ffs)
2 not all, but a large majority. unfortunately a lot of the ones who were not that way, are gone - whether thats gone in the sense that Jon Stewart \was* where he basically was sayin "im tired boss" - or the irreversible version of "im tired" that took Kurt Cobain, Chester Bennington, Mac Miller, Chris Cornell, etc.)
I'm kind of in the same boat. At least I agree with the first part. I had to basically raise myself and my older(yes) sister growing up. I've gotten to the point now that I'm just doing whatever weird shit I want. I can act like a kid at home all I want. My wife gets giggles and thinks it's cute when I paint minis or get excited about some random bullshit. And I agree. My give-a-damn is busted as they say.
There is an interesting irony between higher responsibility coupled with lower feeling of being grown up
Yes, but we’re also extremely smart in comparison with other generations. We got educated, most of us can read and enjoy culture stuff, we have fun, we understand how to use computers, email, phones. The generation before missed the leap to computers, and by all accounts the generation below us have a really hard time with reading, computers, social skills. We seem to have caught a wind where we know it all, but just have no money to do anything with it!
On a serious note, we need to realize our own power. We need to realize that it is OUR JOB NOW to take the reins and instigate change, particularly political/economic change. We are the adults now, even if we do still have a Pokémon card collection…
Just me an Jigglypuff, out changing the world.
You’re likely correct though
An entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.
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3mo
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3mo
That's frickin adorable and I love it lol
This is the new “millennial math”! Love it.
If you own a house and 3 cars at 34 and paid for it yourself - you’re adult enough, your hobbies have nothing to do with being an adult.
58M here - I don’t feel much different to when I was 14.
Ironically at the ripe age of 38 I still have days I feel like an overgrown kid or teenager lol
I’m definitely an overgrown kid. I’m 37 and the primary caregiver to my only child, one of my favorite parts is getting to “be a kid again”. We make forts, I swing on swings all the time, play hide and seek, go to the park. It’s amazing. I get to see the world through a kids eyes constantly and it’s great. I know the general trope is that kids age you, but having just one and dedicating myself to her feels like it keeps me young more than anything
32 and I'm wondering why the real adults are giving me so much power lol
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3mo
I can relate to this so much
This is good to know, I just have to find my people, they exist, we'll sing Disney Love Songs and grow old together
I was speaking to my dad (63) the other day. He says he feels no different mentally of physically than when he was younger (he’s very active, mind you)
Bro were all 28+ years old and yet our current existence is still being dictated to us by our Boomer parents.
We feel like children because they treat us like children. Look at the Average age in congress. Look at our fucking president and his cabinet.
Look how they treated all the incoming young new congress members.
Im in no way a fan of AOC. But fuck they still call her a bartender, like no one else has ever had to work a 2nd job or any job for that matter.
Joe Biden has been in office for 50 years, Nancy 40+, Chuck 40+, Mitch 30+ on and on and on.
They dont have public sector experience, but call us the dumbones and resist any change whatsoever
Say it louder for the people in the back!
I’m in my 50s, fairly indifferent to the Millennial - Boomer rivalry but I hear you loud and clear. And from my seat way back here I’ll happily turn around and relay your message b/c it’s spot on. Millennials are what Prince Charles was to Queen Elizabeth. Y’all aren’t going to have your moment until most of the Boomers are gone.
This!! I'm almost 31 but with my parents still alive I sometimes still feel like the 15/16 year old teenager who rebelled against them nonstop. I still worry about what they'll think, even though they've really evolved to houseplant status this last year.
I had a moment where I thought I cared about investing, turns out just no good video games had come out in that time, but we've gotten some bangers now.
This tracks; I was waiting for new music to come out
I’m in my 50s and have always enjoyed investing but now I feel BG3 and the Elden Ring DLC are going to kill my investing returns through at least the summer. Being a grown up, almost elderly, kid gets more and more expensive with age.
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3mo
I am a 38 year old baby.
Same. I am still wondering when i am going to grow into my big boy pants.
I'm 35 and it feels like my life is just beginning. I have done stuff, made a lot of money, spent a lot of money, but it was all to get to this point.
There's only a small chance in your 30s but your life may be ending at any given moment. Having had some of my peers pass away already was a big hint that the clock is ticking.
Yes, I have an endoscopy in a few days that will decide my fate.
Endoscopy for what? I should have died at like 29 when my appendix almost was about to burst, thankfully an Appendectomy let me live to see my second child.
I feel like I’m Benjamin Buttoning. Feeling all these feelings I never felt as a kid or in my 20s. Letting go of all the frames I thought were important.
As for the news, I feel like it’s more childish(petty) and insane and irrelevant than ever, so I wouldn’t worry too much about that one 😝
“Ok boomer” J/K
I think I just started to realize in the past few years that I’m the adult in the room now. As much power as the boomers still cling to, and as much as they still condescend to me at my age like don’t a mortgage, kids and a battle with cancer under my belt, they’re really not capable of being in control anymore. It’s our responsibility now.
"Men are just boys in big bodies."
And more expensive toys
I feel ya OP.
I don’t have a kid or a house but my wife and I share a decent apartment with two dogs and both have decent, if unspectacular, careers
I’ve never had much desire for all the “grown up” things that my father always tried to push on me.
I had/have no desire for children. I go back and forth on if I want a house. Not even accounting for the tough financial aspect of it, I don’t know if I even want to deal with all the stress of home ownership. Property taxes, maintenance, repairs…..all the things my apartment complex has to deal with.
I never had any interest in anything financial beyond “Are my bills paid? Do I have money for the things I want and need?”
I’m very much a “Work to live” type person whereas my father was “live to work”. Hes in his mid 50s, just now getting ready to retire, and is just now starting to enjoy a bit of his life. Although his chain smoking and drinking might lead to that enjoyment not lasting particularly long despite my years of trying to get him to stop.
I’m a 16 year old trapped in a 36 year olds body.
And I’m ok with it. It took some time but I read a quote by CS Lewis that puts it far more eloquently than I ever could
”Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.”
Millennial imposter syndrome. It’s a thing, look it up.
I certainly feel like an adult.
That doesn't mean I'm never immature or don't have fun. But I try to take responsibility for my life and those who depend on me.
You’ll get there about 45…trust me lol
I’ll be 41 and I’m just now beginning to get my life together including my finances.
I am a 17 year old trapped in the body of a 36 year old thing. I stopped mentally growing around 17 when I experienced a lot of debilitating trauma. Never got over it and I'm pretty much disabled mentally and a lot of physical disabilities too. I pretty much don't have a life, I am an adult child that never grew up and I feel guilty every day.
I’m sorry to hear this, and I wanted to comment to let you know I relate. I experienced a lot of trauma at 18 and I have been stuck mentally since, and I feel I never even moved on from the year. I just wanted to let you know you’re not alone, and I hope things get better for you.
I’m 27. Moved abroad at 22 alone, lived in 5 countries so far. I feel over these years abroad I changed significantly and I do feel an adult
May I ask how? Was it a job opportunity, school or something else?
I received an automated message from a bot saying my post was deleted because of rule 12, even though I can still see it, so I’m reposting it with a slight modification:
During the first two years I was studying an European master organized by five different countries, from which I chose to live only in two to make it easier, France and Finland. Then, I moved for a year to Switzerland to work as research assistant (I’m a chemist) and eventually I moved to Haifa to do a PhD, where I am at the moment
You probably should care about investing…
It's a long term game though, plus it only really works if you put in a lot of savings or leverage. There's also really frustrating times when the economy is in a downturn, but those times also create opportunites.
I thought I wouldn't like reddit anymore ..
Honestly same, I'm 28 and still feel like a teenager sometimes. Maybe it's because we're the generation that never wants to grow up? #PeterPanSyndrome
I view it as a privilege. As long as you're taking care of the big picture business, there is no shame in being a big kid at heart. I laugh at the absolute dumbest shit with my wife every day and honestly, it's a blessing. There is so much badness in the world, if we're able to feel like kids now and then, it probably means we're pretty lucky.
I always thought people on their 30s were so cool and had it all together. Turns out it's just the same with more social skills and a better facade. Of course you look sophisticated after having faked being sophisticated for 10 years.
I am also constantly forced to learn new things and do new things, so I feel like a teenage noob inside a lot of the time, just stumbling through the world. I like it though. Also relationships and peopling has become so much easier, same old same old, and so I can now focus on other things. My husband and I are 40, and have just now started caring about investments and finances, mostly because we feel the creaks now and realized life is half over, economy is going to shits again and pension is only 20 odd years away. Funnily enough, it doesn't feel that much different from when I suddenly took school seriously in High School, because I realized college wasn't that far off and there are jobs I want and don't want.
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3mo
Playing Stardew valley on the switch right now as I read this 😂
Am 39, don’t watch the news, don’t really care. I vote and do my due diligence at that time only. I play video games, I play golf, I fish. Am homeowner. Investing is very important for your future so study that but other wise, live your life as you see fit. Love thy family first and foremost.
I asked my boyfriend at dinner last night if we were adults cuz I didn’t feel like one.
I focus more on investing than anything else. I’m 37 and feel behind. Haven’t had a game console since the ps1. People have different vibes and things click at different ages. Maybe start forcing yourself to focus on other things little by little.
Do you spend more time with your kid than gaming
I feel like an adult because I provide a good life for my family and raise my kids right.
Vote for the better of the two options, but the best and brightest are simply not politicians or people overly invested in politics these days.
So yes, I would say I feel like an adult, but I also still like to have fun and I dont take myself overly serious. I dont think thats unique for millenials either.
I just turned 30 and I honestly feel younger than ever. Got a job, bills, all of that but I had such a higher level of stress when I was younger from issues I was not equipped to deal with that I felt older than I actually was. All my problems now seem more simple. Or maybe I'm just better at dealing with them. I don't really feel how people say being an adult is supposed to feel, I guess.
Seeing the Gen-Z youth with their silly social media trends (especially hackneyed haircuts) certainly makes me feel more mature. I also left computer games far behind many years ago already, makes electronics much more economic to obtain since I don't care about GPU power. I drive a super practical beater car but i'm fully aware that nice cars can be fun and awesome (whereas some types of cars are just outright douchy). Investing is something i started in my teens already because it's one of the opportunities to make life easier later on.
Im aging in reverse
I’m about 20 years older than you and came here to say that for many of us that never changes. I’d also like to suggest that you are fortunate you feel this way. Just make sure you take care of your responsibilities and then enjoy the fun of being an aging kid!
My body is 46. My mind is 16.
No 😂 I’m 35, married for 3 years, own a home and a dog, and expecting my first baby. I still feel like a child 😆
Same here, minus the kids, I currently only have one sports car, and swap baseball for Pokemon. I feel like a weeby middle schooler who is somehow not only allowed to drive, but gets paid to assess the driving of others.
I collect Hot Wheels, Matchbox, and do a little scale modeling. I’m into Pokemon cards and games. I have over 2,000 hours in Animal Crossing. I have more plushies and toys than most kids, and write cringey, elaborate Naruto fanfiction. Pretty much the same hobbies I had in middle school, except now I have adult money and a real car that I love.
The older I get though, the more I realize my dad is also just a big fun kid, modding his own car, occasionally going to the arcade, watching old shows, and whipping around town listening to loud rock music he loved as a kid. He always seemed so adulty and responsible (and he is) when I was growing up, but only out of necessity like the rest of us.
I am 40 and my interests are still more or less the same as when I was 20-25. I still play video games, I still collect cards, I still collect/shoot guns, I still watch Anime, etc etc. I would say I am probably a bit less compulsive, and probably calmer at 40 compared to 25, but I feel pretty much the same.
Our parents were no different, their interests were just different at the time.
I feel that given that millennial gone through so much technological advances around the turn of millennium there is no way we would be doing what our parents were doing when they were in your age.
I’m a 40 year old teenager;I love it. 18 at best I pay bills( I guess) but I definitely do it in butterfly wings and purple eyebrows.
Everyone else is finally getting the key to success as far as I’m concerned
I stopped telling my nieces and nephews to “be mature”, bc that’s a lie. I’ve seen more childish behavior in the workplace
nope
I’ve had to actively stop myself from saying things like ‘this requires an adult’… turned 36 recently lol
When I started working in my career, my dad use to give me so much shit for not watching the news or being ignorant about politics… said I should watch the news in the morning- nice and easy.
Suuuper depressing week.
Your best years of investing are gone, but you still have plenty of time to build a healthy IRA or 401k. If your work offers a 401k and you haven’t been at least taking the match, you need to slap yourself. The news is a double edged sword. You can objectively absorb news from varying resources and come to a rational conclusion about the world. Or you can avoid it or just watch one resource and you be an uninformed Doomer like the rest of this group.
Thanks, but I’m in a strange position right now where I’m getting paid to just go to college full time lol.
You can open an IRA then. If only $50/month, you can still start building it up.
YIKES! I feel bad for your mom I mean wife.
No, why is this constantly posted here, no wonder people older than us don’t take us seriously. I very much feel 32, I have multiple degrees, and a lot of experience in my field. I’m around 20 somethings everyday and I easily keep a healthy boundary between us. I don’t go to clubs anymore, I barely go out but when I do I look for places that have an 30+ crowd because I like being around people my age. I don’t want to be with with anyone younger than 30, I’m just trying to chill.
I feel bad for your kids. Get off your play station and focus on them and their lives.
Yes.
I mean… I did finally get the car I wanted my entire childhood?
In due time young grasshopper
A few months shy of 40 and it feels like I’m masquerading as an adult.
I just turned 36 and I peaked at 22 and never recovered.
It’s an illusion, people have always felt young at heart.
Same but not the same.
My partner (39) and I (35) have those hobbies too. He likes cars, video games, collecting watches and whiskey. I like binge watching TV, reading, and puzzles. But as we got older, we started looking into investing (for the future, for the kids and to have a fun retirement), I like to look at nicer furniture and woodworking (so now I'm into antiques). I feel like with more financial stability, these things naturally happen as your priorities change and your ability to afford them changes.
I stopped aging at 24. Even then I didn't feel like an adult.
You should have been investing in your 20s. Always good to keep up on the news as long as it's a legit source and not like... Breitbart...
You can do that and still play video games and have nice cars and collect baseball/pokemon cards.
I'm 38, my teenage years were mostly taken away from me, so now as an adult I do whatever I wanted to do as a teenager, but with enough money to do it so it's better. My wife says I'm like 1 of the kids. But I see no reason why this is a problem.
You can do infantile things and adult things with your life, it's not a binary choice.
I play videogames, watch wrestling, rewatch stuff from when I was a kid, and I also run my own business and run my own house.
Cuz it all turned (fake) uninteresting on purpose, the older generations are trying to steal our way of living from right underneath our noses. But it's okay just keep playing PlayStation.
lol i started caring about news and investing at like 16, I don't think my dad ever cared about investing at all.
I felt like an adult when I got poop on my hand changing a diaper and didn't freak out about it.
Same! 33.
I mean, I feel like both adult and child… I have a career and responsibilities. I pay attention to the news. Frankly, love investing and finances. But then I also play video games and enjoy anime and comic books in my free time.
It is a good mix and depending on the time of day I can feel like either. I think the luxury of being able to indulge and take an interest in “childish” things is a benefit of living and growing up in prosperous times and a 1st world country.
Yes, I am a professional in my career, though I feel lots of people I work with are not adults.
36 still pretending to know what im doing.
Glad there are others lol.
I think I did finally feel like a 'grown up' after turning 30. But I'm still a massive dork who would happily ditch all responsibilities to play video games.
Now I'm 33 and pregnant for the first time and honestly I'm so psyched to have my kiddo. It won't be for years but I'm already excited to read picture books, make potato stamps and do at home (kid safe) science experiments. I know on the one hand I'll be mum, but being a kid again with my kid is such an exciting prospect 😅
Yes, finally, but I'm not sure when it happened exactly so I don't know what to tell you
I don't feel that different as a person. I think more critically but my modus operandi hasn't changed in 30 years. I just know more stuff and my body is older. shrug
I don't have any of those. But just know you are doing well. With plenty who love you around.
I’m glad others feel he same.
I’ve felt mid 30s since about 14 years old.
Felt like a kid until I had a daughter 7 months ago.
Even though I was mid 30s had a professional career own a home still felt like a kid bc when work was out I could do whatever I wanted. Mostly riding my bike or playing with my cnc router for hours.
But now that my daughter is here that is no more. I get home from work get changed and clock into dad mode so my wife can clock out for a bit. It's hard but I love that girl so much so it's totally worth. But yeah never felt like an adult till my daughter was born 7 months ago
It’s perfectly fine for you.
Same. 42, 2 kids, married. My wife scolds me often for behaving like a 14 year old. Because of shenanigans with my kids. Never felt really adulthish and to this date, I'm still not sure how the whole marriage, kids and adult life even happened and still works. Somehow I manage ...
I try to stay as humorous as I can, at all times, sardonic or otherwise
Depends upon the day, hour and minute. At 40 yo, I think it's a combo of things.
I think that the first and biggest issue is "adulthood"... is a lie. As kids we looked up to the adults around us as "people who had it all together" and thought we'd be the same someday. They seemed so worldly and knowledgeable.
But if you really look back on it... they were just like we are now. I can look back on things my Mom, Dad or other adults did and just laugh (empatheticly) at the chaos I can now recognize they were going through but didn't understand at the time... because I now have those same moments. The great secret of adulthood is no one has everything 100% together and anyone who says they do is either selling you something or bold faced lying to others and possibly themselves.
So long as you are having new experiences, there are new opportunities to grow and it's in those moments we feel like kids again: Unsure, lacking confidence and so on because it's new.
I think the other issue is how many new forms of entertainment were created or solidified as we grew up. Take gaming for example. We didn't have many opportunities to see out parents playing them because that wasn't something they grew up with or knew most of the time. So, in our heads that's always seen as a "teen hobby" despite games like Last of Us, God of War or Baldur's Gate 3 having increasingly adult topics and concepts showing how it's shifting to accommodate an Adult demographic. Whereas if you take a hobby like music... I saw my father playing drums and many other adults do that. Or sports was another hobby. Or gardening is another one. It's more likely that we'd see those older hobbies as more "adulty" than the newer ones because we saw adults doing them as kids.
And I don't think they were more interested in investments and stocks than we are, or they're interested in a different way. I now talk to my Dad about them and for him... I think it's almost like a game. I get serious min/max, SDV, "make the numbers go up" vibes when he starts talking about it. Lol So, I don't think it's quite the mature focus it may seem to be at first glance.
All that to say...
You can pry my Xbox and PS from my cold, dead, 80+ hands. Life us too short to worry about how "adult" the things that make you happy are.
Same. Been with my wife for 19 years, lived in our house for 9. Both our cars our paid off and both my dogs are asleep on at least part of me right now.
Called for an electrician to replace a 30amp line. Opened the door to greet him and Jesus Christ he must have been 22-23. I wanted to die inside thinking about how I am not a man and need a boy to do this task for me. At least he’s a certified and insured electrician.
I then worked (from home) on and off throughout the day, giving an honest effort but also letting time slip away from me on an extra long lunch break because I’ve been messing around in Nightingale. Then after work it was gaming until 11:00 (I’m too old to stay up much later anymore).
I still say things like “I need an adult” and then realize that’s me, I’m the adult. I have no idea what’s going on in town because I don’t read the paper but I do follow local Facebook groups so the boomers can keep me informed… or at least say racist shit and talk about politics in a way that remind me I’m not all that dumb after all.
I struggle with mowing the lawn, I hate doing it- especially my front yard where it feels like the tree’s roots are popping up in new places every year. I use electric lawn equipment so I don’t feel like a manly man that smells of gas and changes oil.
The most adult things I do now are clean up after the new puppy without hesitation, make Dr/Dentist appts and actually go to them, therapy once a week, and pay for dinner when we take our parents out.
We’ve been having fertility issues (we’re almost 40 and only decided to try within the last 1.5 years). A false start and now IVF tried and failed the first round had me thinking “Okay, time to get it together and shape up. Be who you want to be for your kid. Do the hard things like being kind when you’re frustrated, fold your damn clothes and put them away, try harder at work and earn more”.
I guess I should do those things for me but an external stimulus works so much better.
Invest in ETFs like Vanguard (they have a few funds). Just dump some money in that you’re ok with not touching for a few years and just let it do its thing.
I’m not around younger people often (my cousins are all around the same age as me). I then read posts on here and realize I am older and wiser than I used to be. So maybe do that, find a reason to interact with GenZ or something. Rizz them up fr fr. You’ll feel more like an “adult”.
Yes and no. I don't really feel like an adult necessarily either but I definitely do adult things like u mentioned regularly. Plan for the future, pay bills, parenting etc. However I also do the kid stuff too like play video games regularly and have the same hobbies I've always had. I dress pretty much the same, too.
Nope. I feel like I’m aging backwards mentally sometimes.
I’ve realized that many things are fake. That sense of adulthood caring about the news or whatever is only roleplay, to the social expectations. You are an adult, a more version of one, and maybe a happier one since you don’t deny yourself the small things that make it pleasurable for you like a video game
I am a 41 year old child. You’re not alone.
Mentally no. Physically yes.
I'm 41, what's an adult?
I said i wanted to be 24 forever... But I guess it's just mentally
When am I supposed to start caring about like the news and investing, or whatever my dad was doing back in the day? Iol
When you stop arbitrarily inserting "like" in the middle of your sentences and ending them with "lol".
Joking aside, I think our generation has cultivated an attitude of agelessness, and societal factors have slowed or halted the process of advancing to the next "life stage".
I definitely feel like I've matured significantly over the years, but I still love playing and collecting video games, watching anime, and doing many of the things I enjoyed doing in childhood. I don't think it's a bad thing to not feel like an adult, as long as you don't neglect the responsibilities of being one.
I’ve been 29 for the last 5 years. And when I was 29, I still felt like a kid. I think I’m going to be 29 again next year.
I wouldn't call that feeling like being a boy. Ya just got hobbies and you can enjoy them.
Honestly, this is a great question you could be having with your wife. But as long as you cover all your responsibilities, you're suppose to enjoy life.
I think this is most people but different people have different interests and the level that you can do it depends on your situation. Also remember that as kids, we had a different perspective on adults than what we do now. I’m taking care of kids and the idea that I have friends and hobbies is wild to them. I also know parents that haven’t done anything for fun for themselves in years. I mean if you’re not financially comfortable and you’re working multiple jobs, stressed about bills and expenses or trying to keep the house together, that’s what your kids see and they think that’s what it means to be an adult.
I still think of my parents and uncles as the grown-ups of this family... Im 34 married and with a kid lol
The difference between a boy and a man is the price of his toys.
No such thing as an adult. Everyone is flailing all the time to figure out what is going on and how to get through it. The fact that people don't realize this is children is because every one of a certain age realizes there's a responsibility to not let the kids see you flail. I feel like that's where our generation comes up a little bit short. I see a lot of my peers trauma dumping on their own children. Using them as therapists or best friends. Guys Lorelei Gilmore is a bad parenting role model.
In my free time, definitely not. I’m 33 and am very much the same. But whenever I’m running a meeting at work, talking to my son’s doctor, or when I’m around teenagers; I feel ancient.
At least you have a wife, dog, house and 2 extra cars than me.
Have a brick house like I've always wanted, 9 pets, 4 vehicles and I still feel like a 30 year old girl too!
I love to enjoy my childish interests, but I also how to be mature in the right situations haha it's good to have a good medium
I joke that I'm still mentally 12 (I often say I'm a 12 year old boy mentality despite being a 33 year old woman). I sleep with stuffed animals, I'm married, I collect cards of Korean men like they're Pokemon cards, I have an adult job, I have spent my last three evenings playing Stardew Valley as if I don't have a job, hubby and I are slowly starting the process of saving for a house and paying off debt once he starts his job (we live in his parents' basement)... I do adult things sometimes but I ultimately feel like a teenager. It's weird because at my age, my parents had two kids and they just bought a house. I can't imagine doing that even when we save enough.
I feel this so hard. I have an important corporate job with four people dependent on me to live. Yet all I think about is Lego, sports cards, and watching wrestling. When will I grow up? Lol
I was 40 my oldest was 11, I realized I was too far in debt with a nice house, boat, truck, good career before I thought fuck I've grown up
I feel, at most, 19 on a good day.
I don't have a lot of good days.
I (33) didn’t feel like an adult until I had a kid
Now I definitely do. But it’s okay! I don’t feel old or anything. It’s just that added responsibility and demand for selflessness has been the catalyst.
I feel the same way, and I talked about it to my Baby Boomer mom. She insisted that it’s not a millennial phenomenon and that adults in general feel this way. I wonder how true that is?
Yes. I'm 37 and I feel 37.
Sometimes I feel guilty when I’m just playing video games and to alleviate that guilt, I would load up the laundry or the dishes and run them.
Then I go back to playing.
I feel like I stopped aging mentally at 26.