Boomers hate bidets

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Because they think it makes you gay

A common misconception about bidets other than it being "gay" like other responses have pointed out is that some people genuinely think the water comes from out of the toilet. Like, they think if you take a dump and then use your bidet, you're cleaning yourself with poop based water. Which if course is not the case. This isn't confined to Boomers, I've had to explain this to several people of different ages when I mentioned getting a bidet when it became impossible to find toilet paper in 2020.

Because using toilet paper and fingering your butthole is straight

And American 🇺🇸 

I’m sure they think it is sexual … the looks I get from older dudes when I (a straight dude ) explain how I use one every chance I get…. They look at me like I’m in the gay orgy scene from wolf of wallstreet

OK, I have a Boomer bidet story to add to this thread. Two Boomers I know went to Rome and stayed at a fancy hotel. The bathroom had a toilet and a bidet. They said they weren't going to use the bidet for it's standard purpose, so they decided to use it for storage. Guess what they stored in there?

Their ice. For their drinks. AND NOT IN A BUCKET.

There was significant gagging when this story was relayed, and the Boomers couldn't understand why everyone was grossed out. "It was clean, they had just cleaned the room!....".

Edit: I can't spell.

Have you seen the number of men who refuse to wipe their ass?

Because they generally hate and fear anything that isn't what "they grew up with". It's really just being afraid of anything different and lashing out at said things because their warped sense of reality forbids them.

Straight male, 54, and I will swear by a bidet. Greatest thing in the world.

This is just something I read once, but American and British soldiers who were in Paris in WW2 experienced bidets for the first time time in brothels. When they came home, they told others about them, associating them with sex workers, therefore something “dirty” and “intimate.” I think they can’t shake that association.

We bought bidets during the Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020. I will never go back!!! I love my bidets. I no longer have to worry about the brown Sharpie stuck between by ass cheeks.

I love my bum gun, my ass is sparkling.

i have a bidet and told my mother in law to use it she asked what it was like and i told her not to use full power because it was like being penitrated by poisidons dick and my father and law puffed up his chest and said " im not getting penitrated by anything". im like its a joke but not really lol. needless to say my mother and law came out and said " im in love with posidon"

I (37M) installed my first bidet about 5 years ago and I gotta say it’s honestly one of the best investments I’ve ever made! Itchy butthole and skid marks are a thing of the past! I even went so far as to install one in the employee bathroom at work so I don’t have to feel dirty all day just using tp. I’ve had many comments made about it being “kinda gay” that I clean my asshole, but like, why would anyone wanna walk around all day with a crusty/itchy bootyhole? I can’t imagine ever going back to not using one, and wish I’d bought one much sooner.

My whole family gave me shit on christmas because we have a bidet. Like would not stop giving me absolute shit about it & I just said "IF YOU GOT SHIT ON YOUR HAND WOULD YOU JUST USE A PAPER TOWEL? OR WATER?" & they were mostly quiet with grumbles . fine let them walk around with shit seasoned assholes. lol

Speaking from personal experience and growing up i a very macho driven culture. Its a fear of liking it, turning gay and making god weep.

Oh boy, do I have a story for this one. My dad asked for a bidet toilet seat for his birthday, after I’d told him how much we really like ours. I sent him one with all the bells and whistles—heated water and seat, multiple presets, and a built-in fan for drying. When he opened it on his birthday, I was told that my (very religious) boomer mother called me “that SEXUAL PERVERT” and announced she wouldn’t allow that “evil thing” in her home. I think she believes bidets are used for masturbation?? He won’t tell me what she did with it, but given her past actions, it’s likely she destroyed it so that it could never harm others.

Because it’s “gay”

We had a plumber who is old af and he said he installed one of those lady toilets. Like do they really think it’s just for vaginal use? That makes zero sense.

Bidets are the greatest things ever. I read somewhere that in WW2, American soldiers saw bidets in brothels in Europe and associated them with prostitution. Probably passed that onto their boomer children.

Also, it's gay to not rub your asshole to a bloody pulp while fingering it through the toilet paper. /s

That fucking bidet changed my life. Anyone who refuses to use one, unless their butthole is allergic to water, is an idiot. Frankly I often feel superior to "wipers", walking around with their dirty dingleberried stinky starfish. Yuck.

I am a 76-year-old male and love my Bidet.

My 74-year-old brother and his wife HATE a Bidet. He even installed a Bidet for me in the guest bathroom for when I visit.

I try to put it this way…. If you get shit on your finger are you going to wash it off or just wipe it off with toilet paper. 🤔

I love giving myself bidet-enemas.

Ok hear me out.

I’ve never actually had an enema but I have a general idea how it works. If you turn the bidet on and angle yourself properly and relax, it will squirt (clean) water straight into your rectum. You can then spray that right out and GUESS WHAT? It will make those little rabbit-shitballs go launching out your ass like the pig through the dam on the Simpsons. If you had loose yucky diarrhea it will help you spray out all sorts of extra loose chunks. If you’re constipated it can help get you going.

It can help flush out the last shitbits with minimal effort instead of clenching yourself into a hemorrhoidal rage! I FART LESS!

YOU GUYS, IT CLEANS THE EXTRA SHIT OUT OF YOUR RECTUM AND YOU MAKE FEWER FARTS, think of what the ladies will say??!?

Anyway I love my bidet and I’m still as straight as the day I first tried one in Japan on a business trip.

Because the only ass they get is when there finger goes through the toilet paper.

Meanwhile you get Italian boomers that say that the bidet is the pinnacle of civilisation and everyone who doesn’t use it is a barbarian (and they are absolutely correct)

They're afraid of things that are foreign to them/things they don't understand.

OH NO IT’LL MAKE YOU GAY LOOK OUT!!! Lmao

I have one and advocate for them all the time. They're great. How does dry TP smearing shit around clean a butthole? It doesn't.

...I was lowkey considering investing in one but I hadn't even considered how helpful it would be for shark week. Absolutely more than lowkey considering now.

I should point out: it's Anglophone and uncultured Boomers that have this aversion.

Europeans, south Asians, south Americans, and probably many of other origins don't have this sort of dumbassery in them.

Most boomers think it shoots the dirty water in the bowl at your ass. It doesn’t. The rest think it is some kind of perved out sex toy that pleasures the ass. Ass pleasure in men automatically makes them gay. It does not, but boomers know this to be true.

I got one for my household and my parents during the great TP shortage and my husband was initially concerned about the fact that the water was going to be cold, but once he tried it, he insisted we put one in every bathroom. Mom got dad to install it at theirs, but he refused to use it for a few months. We just said "okay". Well, once he started using it, he was a convert and again, they got one for every bathroom in the house. My husband's hunting camp also has one now. HUNTING CAMP! The only guy who still won't use it is single and also the only conservative in the group. I have no idea why politics would make you not want to have a clean pooper.

I love the Japanese bidets we have in our home! We have one in each bathroom and it makes it so much better!

My grandparents don’t have to bend as much to try and wipe. Also clean buttholes! Great for if you have stomach problems(like my family does) and have to use the bathroom multiple times an hour.

Constipated? There’s a turbo function that helps stimulate and help it come out!

My mom convinced my cousin who was against it by “would you rather wipe poop off your arm or wash it off? Same with your butt”.

I just got one 3 years ago and I have no idea how I lived without one for years. I have never felt so clean and I use less tp!

They are so easily embarrassed over normal things. Mentioned bidets, tampons, therapy, and being queer will give them an aneurysm.

Now that they know Trump shits himself on a regular basis, all the boomers want to do it.

They are really, really stupid. Plus, lead poisoning.

They. Fear. Change. That is the answer to every “why do boomers…” question.

Got a really conservative coworker into using bidets when he got a rental in Gatlinburg and I told him he's gotta try the bidet in the bathroom.

He has 3 bathrooms in his house, and they now all have bidets.

I love Chipotle. Billy Mays couldn't sell me Chipotleway, but dammit did Amazon come through with this bidet.

These kinds of stories surprise me every time.

I grew up in Italy where there is a bidet in every private bathroom.

For me it is unthinkable that someone could be against bidets and would prefer to walk around dirty with shit or have their stomach bleed by rubbing it with tons of toilet paper.

It's as if someone still defended the "bathrooms" of the far west, where you shit in a hole dug in the ground with a shovel and cleaned yourself with leaves.

Not true. Check it: I dated a Muslim girl. They have to wash with water every time they use the bathroom. Wiping isn't enough. If they don't, it's a sin. She put me on to the lota (a container you use to wash your junk and butthole). The first time I used it, it was a revelation. Say goodbye to dingleberries forever! So I started using a shampoo bottle. What can I say? I like a little more water pressure. My next girlfriend (now wife) thought the shampoo bottle was weird, so when we moved in together she bought a bidet, and now she can't live without it. Then she bought one for her boomer parents because her mom caught her dad washing his ass in the sink, and now her whole family, siblings included, are bidet gang! We'll never have a bathroom without one again.

In all seriousness though, I think the comment about it being private is telling. It's a tool to wash your ass and/or genitals out in the open where anyone can see it. To some people I think casually acknowledging that there are asses and/or genitals and that they must be regularly cleaned and therefore regularly touched is immodest to the point of bordering on taboo.

I think they think the water is coming from the bowl. Idk people are weird/stupid. We have bidets on our toilets and love them. I hate to have to use any other bathroom. But no one that has ever visited has used them. I always explain them. I don't get it.

My southern family on moms side was somehow completely opposite it was wild. I thought they would hate it, my mom used one at my house and loved it so I got her and my grandma one, my uncles and cousins used grandmas and they all ended up getting one or wanting one. Did not expect that. My dads side still refuses tho

Having a clean butt is not manly!!! Having a clean butt is not conservative!!!

It's to close to how you spell biden

As a man, I get looks from other men when I talk up mine. I usually end it by saying, "whatever, I got a robot to clean my asshole for me. You go 'head and use dry paper, like a peasant."

I'm a boomer (IN FLORIDUH!) and at the start of covid I bought two 'add-on' bidets.

Any time there is a threat of anything - weather, epidemic - jeez, even a fishing tournament ALL the stores have a run on toilet paper!

Toilet paper and bread. Toilet paper and bread.

I wonder sometimes which end gets which!

So this boomer feels comfy and clean AND ALL THE OTHER BOOMERS CAN SCRATCH THEIR ASSES! (Literally)

Boomers are why we can't have nice things. When my boomer dad decided he was going to help me get my first new car (I'm Gen X) he refused to let me buy a car with a sun roof (because he claims it would leak) or power windows (claiming it's one more thing that could break). Eventhough before that, he never owned a car with either of those things and really didn't know what he was talking about.

You would think that having the CLEANEST BUTT would be the least ewwwwwww thing ever??!!!

There is a definite collapse of logical thought going on with the whole bidet thing.

I have been planning on getting them for all our bathrooms and now I am going to, cuz I feel cranky as all hell, like I am back in time arguing a point with my parents

One Christmas I suggested to my wife that we get her dad (who is a boomer) a bidet. He absolutely loves it. He even said it was the best Christmas present he’s ever gotten. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t beam at that. 😁

*he’s disabled, and had trouble in that department before we got it.

Lead poisoning promotes a proclivity towards dirty assholes.

There’s a general sense of squeamishness about anything to do with the body’s effluents

Haha, your mom thinks you're sexually assaulting your kids with a water hose.

These people are mental.

My Boomers actually turned me on to bidet life. They had them installed in their house, and after I used it, I was hooked.

The Devil's Water Fountain

I would love a bidet. Might work one in if I ever get this house remodeled.

It might feel good. We can't have that

Do they think it’s used for masturbation?