My husband’s family keeps giving us “vintage” baby items.

I hope she’s got your husbands spine stored away somewhere too, it sounds like he needs it back.

A favorite line of mine, and what I remind my husband all the time, is that it matters to me way more to be a good mother, than a good daughter. Your husband is choosing being a good son over a good dad, and if that’s his priority then 🚩

Just another perspective - I’d be happy that they were giving me all these things so I could choose not to use them because I imagine an alternate universe where all this unsafe stuff is at their house for “when the baby come over”

Oh, so he just wants peace, huh? So all you have to do is throw a bigger fit than his mom & grandma, right? 😈

He’s smarter than this. Why are their feelings more important than baby safety? No one wants to hear that the stuff they’ve been storing is garbage, but it sounds like they didn’t keep up with safety standards or anything.

Crying at 1994 being vintage but you're totally justified in taking that crap to recycling centers since it's all garbage. This is 100% a put your foot down and don't be afraid of coming off as the bad guy moment. Also, get other friends or family members to rally behind you if you really need to use a mob to get his head out of his ass. Good luck!!

Literally bitched about this in my due date group today. Hubby's mother has pulled this vintage cot from somewhere that looks like it last appeared in a haunted orphanage. It's to go in bub's room at her house (even though we have said that bubby doesn't need a room at her house).

It's metal, the bars are too far apart, it doesn't fit a modern (safe!) mattress, it's rusty and the paint is peeling (and she refuses to test the paint for lead).

I hate every single part of it but because I've already said no so many times I'm trying to get hubby to and he says no because "she's just excited".

I'm furious. I'll need to perform an exorcism on my baby if she comes home after sleeping in that cursed thing.

I told my MIL “We’re not using anything that’s not brand new and baby safe according to up to date guidelines”. She wasn’t happy, because she wanted to give my son my husband’s THIRTY FOUR years old ratty dog plush that’s made mostly of his old drool, mites and dirt at this point.

She got over it. They always do, just say no.

If it’s from 1964 it’s probably v beautiful, wheel it into the backyard and plant flowers in it 😂

Example: https://c8.alamy.com/comp/D89PR0/pram-used-as-a-planter-chelsea-flower-show-2013-D89PR0.jpg 

Edit: I just realized the crib is from 1964, not the stroller. 😂

My MIL tried to do this with my husband’s baby furniture. We all had a real battle about it, but my husband stuck to our boundaries (which I was very proud of). In the end we recommended my MIL read a couple books on modern grand parenting, she read both of the books we recommended and things have been much better since then.

Is there anyway you could store the items and have a vintage style photo shoot once baby is born and then sell or donate to a photographer? Explain how you love the idea of the memories attached to said items, but with all these new studies it was proven to not be safe to use in your day to day life but still wanted to honor the items which is why you took the pictures and have now passed the items on so more people can create precious memories with their babies.

Tell him that family members will get over hurt feelings, but baby can’t “get over” an amputated finger or a death from a serious injury

Super relatable. My mom was insisting that I take a 1940s foldable bassinet that she was placed in as a baby. It was a large basket that was painted (lead paint??) and the rickety metal legs kept folding in on themselves.  She also kept the ORIGINAL mattress and bedding. "It fell apart in the wash and destroyed my washer, but I managed to salvage it and put it back together!" 

She also wanted me to take the childhood 80s oak high chair she openly talked about needing repair (and full of metal clasps that I literally remember pinching my fingers on). Obviously she was super insulted when I declined 🫠

I understand taking it to keep the peace but then coming home and trashing it.

As long as she doesn't stick her fingers in it?!

How exactly does he expect to control where a baby sticks their fingers? He's being unrealistic at best. Babies health and safety is more important. If he wants to take them to not hurt her feelings he should have a place to store them because it is not ok to put your baby in danger to avoid some unpleasantness.

Imagine him explaining to your daughter when she's older that she's missing her fingers because he didn't want to hurt grandma's feelings.

That stuff needs to accidentally get lost forever. And don’t let them watch the baby. There’s sure to be some items they kept for babysitting.

Its trash. If he wants to bring it home and toss it thats on him, but its unsafe, you can’t therefore donate it. You shouldn’t have to deal with it. If he wants to instead of saying no thank you, that’s on him.

The summer is a perfect time for a bonfire if you know what I mean… 🙃

Throw it away & tell him if he brings anything else it’ll also go in the trash

This post has me wanting to hit my head into a wall. 

You're baby's safety > nostalgia.

You can offer to take cute pics of your baby in those items so you can do side by side with your husband's baby pic and your baby pic to find a compromise but I wouldn't even donate those items once you're done. 

Bottles for 30 years?? That's super gross. No way

So you are trying to logic your way out of something they've arrived at emotionally. Personally I'd go with "It's so sweet you kept all these things. I just want the chance to sit and think about my baby while I pick out what I want for her! It's the first thing I get to do for her as a Mom" bonus points if you can get a little weepy.

Oh goodness me. I would be staying a hard no. The amount of times my mil would put my baby down for a sleep and put random shit in the cot with him. I ended up losing it because I told her multiple times it’s not safe and she wouldn’t listen. She was banned from putting him down for a nap after that and I made it very clear why. Fine, your kids didn’t die from you doing xyz but someone’s kid DID die, a few in fact, that’s why standards have changed. So fuck off with your survivor bias and do it the way I have asked you too.

My issue with this is your house isn't a junkyard. I have my own struggles with organization and keeping things tidy so all the extra junk can really overwhelm me. Not to mention the safety hazards.

I would just tell Grandma about the recall any the reasons why, and that you can't keep it in your home but it's so sweet of her to hold onto it for so long. Ask if she wants it back as a keepsake or for you to dispose of it.

Throw it all out after taking a hammer to it. There are some things where a parent should be able to make a unilateral decision on it and items that are dangerous to your kid is one of them.

My husband’s mom also kept everything and we just explained safety standards/a lot of the clothes were not usable and she totally understood and I don’t think expected us to actually use anything, she just enjoyed walking down memory lane. So for Christmas, we surprised her with a few canvas of our son wearing my husband’s outfits from 1994/95 and she loved it!

Not exactly a baby item but my grandma offered us a table that needed to be repainted and immediately followed it up by saying she wasn’t sure if there was lead paint on it, so maybe not. Uh, duh?

I understand to some extent the emotion behind this but I don’t force my sentimentality-based hoarding onto anyone else. No one else wants my memories! Why would I want yours?

Whyyyyy are they like this?? MIL has everything either of her sons ever touched and kept trying to give us all of it. Was stored in an attic that they’ve had to get various animals out of over the years. Then she got hand me downs from some cousin that were about ten years old and started trying to give me all that too. Including a used breast pump. Just whyyyyyy

Just demand respect as a mother! :D It so funny to me because I was on that road myself until I basically said: "enough is enough" and these wonderful gifts stopped. List of things what she tried to give me got more and more ridiculous so I just said that if you keep bringing i will donate or throw away because it's not safe or hygienic. Once I was greeted with 40 year old see through plastic diapers (they looked like plastic bags from a store) with text: "they are perfectly fine to use" .

So, This is a serious hard line for me too. I understand not wanting to hurt his grandmother’s feelings. But 100% his child’s safety should come before her feelings.

But, are there certain pieces that could be used for something else? Is the crib real wood that could be taken apart and maybe made into frames? We had an old crib my great-grandmother used (it was walnut) but not in the best condition. We had someone take it apart and actually made into large frames to put our family pictures in. We had a whole bunch of different sizes. (They checked the wood and made sure it was in good condition first). Maybe even like a shadow box that you can put 1 of some of the items in for your partner. It’s not being used, but he still has some for his memory.

I don’t think that you’re being unreasonable. I think what bothers me about this situation is his blatant disregard when you showed him the recall. He knows kids do everything you DON’T want them to do right? This is a hard line and I’d tell him that. I’d want it to be gone, because who’s to say he wouldn’t try using it if you’re not around and grandma comes to visit.

Throw it all away 

Time for grandma to pack up the idea that you’ll be using any of that stuff. I would just toss it. I’ve done that with a few things my mom gave me because they weren’t safe to donate. Grandma will be fine, she’ll get over it. Your babies safety is all that matters.

Put that stuff right at the curb. You don't have to keep or use something dangerous just because it came from a family member. My MIL offered me a dangerous crib I didn't want for three years before just dropping it at my house. I brought it out on trash day. Even when I tell her I don't want or can't use certain things, she brings them anyway. She is output only. You can't control their behavior, but you can control yours.

I just can't comprehend why hoarders think this old junk is still safe to use. They don't care about safety or the baby, they just want to see their old memorabilia be useful again to justify their hoarding.

We refused tons of stuff from his family. Our place is small enough without them offloading their literal trash onto us.

I told my mom I didn’t want the WICKER bassinet she kept from when I was an infant because it’s not safe anymore. And the bassinet I chose will better fit our needs.

Not only has she not talked to me since March because of this— but she hasn’t bought a single thing for her grandchild.

Our relationship wasn’t the greatest to begin with— but this really solidified things for me.

I've had to have tough conversations with some of my family and my FIL (MIL passed 4 years ago otherwise I'd have to tell her too. I've gotten lots of the "how did my kids survive if it's so unsafe?" Or "wow my kids must have been extra tough to have survived." And other such snarky comments. My go to response has been, "I'm glad nothing happened, but someone's child was injured or killed and so we've made things safer. I'm sure there are things we'll use that our kids will have to change too. We all do the best with the information we currently have and this is what we know."

I swear they take it as an insult or criticism of their parenting, but I always reiterate that last line: you did the best you could at the time with the information available.

I would also be concerned what else they are going to push you guys to do once baby is here… and disregard your babies safety because they think they know better. I would show your husband horror stories about things that can happen if you keep the unsafe items

“Take it back or it’ll be trashed. I’m not risking our child’s life because your family’s feeling are more important to you. If you can’t shine your spine enough to do it, I will”

Baby Boundaries, The Lemon Clot Essay and the FU Binder —> https://reddit.com/r/Mildlynomil/s/WPm6JsLMhI

Oh this brought back flashbacks for me 😭. I had my son in 2022. My fiancé was born in 1990 and his grandmother held onto every single baby item as well, including cloth bibs 😩. He is also an only child on both sides. The metal high chair she pulled out for my son to use during a holiday almost sent me over the edge.

I am in no way sentimental so I don’t hold attachments to things, like decades old baby furniture and would not hold onto that stuff for as long as she did. The safety concerns along with improper storage were too much for me to handle. If she offered for us to take anything I would have tossed it right out!

You’re the mom mama. Say no and buy your own things tbh. Do not risk the baby’s safety to save anyone’s feelings. Hope all goes well. Can’t imagine how frustrated you are.

Maybe someone on eBay wants it for a movie prop. He could take pictures and make a book for them to remember the items and memories by. But safety first, that stuff doesn't belong in your house.

If he won’t say something then you should. I understand wanting to keep the peace but safety is safety. Or just take the stuff and then donate it or throw it away if they aren’t getting it through their heads.

I would speak sense into him or accept the stuff and then get rid of it. Like donate it or throw it out or whatever, if they ask about it say it didn’t meet safety standards so you donated it

you showed him the recall. at that point I'd just throw it away

Sounds like a lot of lead poisoning to me. Especially with toys. Stick to your guns!

Just throw it away. Anything he brings home from them goes right into the trash pile. You’ll be doing everyone a favor. Grandma gets the junk out of her house and you in turn get it out of your house.

Otherwise, send a text to the family saying, “Due to safety reasons, we won’t be accepting any hand me downs.” That’s it, don’t give any further explanation.

Throw it all out when he’s not home! The only thing we got from his Grandparents was a high chair that’s only like 7 years old. We were given a pretty much brand new stroller (daycare parent didn’t use for her baby), and until we bought an actual crib she slept in the pack n play full bassinet.

I didn’t have much hope in CPS in the first place after going through some stuff with husbands nieces and nephews, but had felt better for a while about CPS. Your husband should stop and think about what he would do walking into a house on a case with all the unsafe baby items.

My MIL saved a side rocking cradle that looks likes it for dolls but apparently it’s for a baby. I politely declined. She looked sad but oh well!

She also asked if we wanted a vintage doll pram. Rusting, with springs in it. Didn’t look safe. Said I thanks. She kept it anyway “for later” 🫠

Put it straight to your husband.

You will not compromise on safety, so these thing must not be used.

Either he tells his family or you will.

Give him a deadline to refuse or dispose the items. Then do it yourself if you have to.

It shouldn't be your job to deal with his family, but in this case safety trumps all. Then after this is settled, talk to your husband and tell him that stuff like this is divorce worthy in the future, if he ever puts your child in danger again. If he doesn't understand, then you have a huge problem.

Throw the things in the basement/attic/closet or better yet, throw them out. Tell him your child's safety is non-negotiable. And then tell him to spend his free time locating his spine.

Ugh men and their mommy/grandmommy issues. I'm sorry he's being difficult.

Same thing here. I finally just took one picture with said item, cute caption and then donated the shit. Some stuff is legit not safe and I pushed several times not to take the crap but a picture put it to rest.

My SIL got the same treatment and she also kindly said thank you and took stuff straight to donation.

We had the same issue!! Stuff from 1987 when my husband was born!! He’s also an only child and his parents were already in their 40s when they had him. They were already using old-fashioned stuff from their own siblings’ kids. They have no idea how baby stuff has changed since the 70s/80s. At one point my husband had the NERVE (!) to refuse a beaten up plastic garden chair and they sent passive-aggressive messages daily for two weeks, it was awful. Nowadays I’m just super clear and loud about how I found something I want that specific model of stroller/toy/whatever oh I’m so sorry I know you had something but I already bought it oops… then there’s my FIL modified an old plastic electric car to go something like 30 mph and keeps insisting we bring our 3-year-old over to try it on their high traffic street… most of my grey hairs have been from dealing with this for the past four years or so, since I got pregnant.

Vintage baby gear sells well. Get that bag.

I just want to say I am one of the kids who got the tip of my finger cut off from an unsafe baby item. And yeah that s*** sucked!!!!

Boomers never listen to us.. so blame everything on some expert like the pediatrician or the latest and greatest baby book of guidelines. Site sources. My MIL started supporting the head of my newborn when I said the pediatrician said to do it. THEN she listened.

My husband is an only child and my MIL does the same! The other day she gave me his baby spoon engraved with his name and birthdate. We're not going to use it and now I have to keep track of it, so I'm not happy about that.

What frustrated me the most about my MIL saving everything is feeling like I had no control over any items. I explained to my husband that she had her moment to pick out the items she wanted, and now I want that moment. For any older items, like stuffed animals, toy boxes, etc., I told him that the material those items were made of might not be safe now. After I explained my reasoning behind not wanting the items, he was more open to telling her no to most items.

Stand your ground when it comes to safety and good luck!

Sounds like a family of hoarders who are now dumping their stuff on you. Old stuff could have lead in it btw. You could tell your husband that you’re putting your foot down and you won’t be using any of the things you feel are unsafe. He can get upset over it, but boundaries have already been crossed and he can deal with hurt feelings while you keep your baby safe.

Just toss it and get will see that the safety of your child is more important than saving everyone feelings. That or talk to them yourself because he isn't gonna do it. If they get mad then just tell them "I'm sorry you feel that way but I'm no longer accepting any of these items and you could take back the items you gave us. If not they are gonna go in the trash because of safety issues. Although I do appreciate it I don't want to put the baby at any risk." Now if they are normal human beings then they will understand. But if they don't then tell them "If you don't understand why I won't be accepting the items then how would I know that my baby would be safe if I was to leave her in your care. So should I make sure that never happens?" Watch them change their tone so fast. Just know your husband won't be happy about it but the safety of your child is more important than anything else!

Sounds like you should take shears and blades to all these unsafe items to make them utterly useless to protect your child.

When I vintage, I thought of cute baby prams…but the 90’s, I can imagine how dangerous they are. Grandma feeling might get hurt, but she’ll get over it. That’s only good for reborn dolls…as display. Her grandson needs to stop tripping, safety first!

As the wife of an only child, I feel this. It’s so annoying! My husband is pretty good about saying no and saying we don’t want to collect a bunch of junk or talk about safety concerns but other times we take the stuff and throw it out. I would definitely sit down with him and tell him enough is enough and he needs to stand with you for the safety of your baby!

I definitely get not wanting to cause issues but when it comes to your child’s safety, you know better than anyone, you’ve got to be firm. You’re gonna have to put your foot down and tell them no. As much as I get wanting to gift vintage items from when he was a kid, they’ve got to know that’s not safe. Times have changed since he was a baby plus, most moms want to buy new things for their babies, they can’t expect you to only use what they used back then.

If it were me, I’d tell my husband firmly that this needs to be discussed and then say “look, it’s not that I’m not grateful but in our line of work, we both know better than anyone that we can’t keep accepting vintage items for our baby. I’ve asked you several times to talk to your family about this and you refuse - I’m going to give you one last chance to do so and if not, I’ll put my foot down and tell them myself. Period, end of story.” And give him the rest of the day to say something.

I'd graciously accept, take pics of baby using each item one time, and toss them. The leg work they're putting on you is inordinate, though... idk I might consider just calling a disposal company.

My family has a vintage bassinet that is lovely to look at but terrifying to put a baby in. It was bought for my great aunt who is probably about 80 now so it is ultra vintage. It became such a point of contention and my mom even made a big deal about how I have to make a decision because if I don’t want it my cousin (who was due a few months after me) wanted it. I talked to her at my baby shower and it turns out she never wanted it and she was also getting a lot of pressure to take it. The older generations are convinced it’s some kind of good luck but I gotta say I don’t think it’s done anyone any favors haha

Yeah my mom held on to a lot of my old baby clothes and toys and is now trying to give them to me for my baby. Not a safety hazard like your "gifts", but still not interested in the old crap you hung onto for 35 years.

Somehow I’m really interested in this stroller. Which one is it? On a “child bearing through the ages” level you have a time capsule on hand. Yes the 90s aren’t that far away but I’m sure there are museums somewhere who would love those old things.

For MIL: maybe pick some photos and reenact them for her. She clearly is very sentimental about her experience as a new mom. I bet it would mean a lot for her to see those things used (if only for one photo!)

Than again…my MIL kept 2 boxes and when I send her a picture of my daughter in her dads clothes my mil can’t even remember that those are the clothes she kept… but she also is irritated when we send photos at all. Ugh! This woman!

I mean helped generations right

Be gentle and diplomatic in this situation! Your frustration is understandable. But imagine the state of his grandma, that held on to these things for decades? She's an old lady and he is right not to want to hurt her feelings. What I would do is store all the items that are unsafe away and maybe take a few out when she's around. I think people's feelings shouldn't be hurt when it's avoidable and this situation can be resolved!

You’re responsible for protecting your baby, not the feelings of a grown ass adult. Your husband needs to say something

Just bin things. And tell them the things are going to the bin because you already have x y z and space isn't infinite. I find this is the only way that works at preventing random shit being handed to you from well meaning family members.

Honestly, my grandmother did that with a couple of things (nowhere near the amount it sounds like you’re getting though) we just accepted them and had them on “display” when she visited. But we’re lucky to have an attic to store it in otherwise! The really old bassinet we kept upstairs and told her she used that to sleep in at night but during the day slept downstairs 😂 she’s a really sweet woman and I didn’t want to hurt her feelings!

I take the items and say thank you and I just pitch them. And then they ask about them she outgrew them or she’s unable to use them.

We got a vintage crib too. I accepted the gift. Then I did some research and unfortunately it went on the curb. A vintage crib with missing hardware and too wide slats will not be the reason my baby dies. It just is not going to happen, sorry grandma, lol.

I never said anything about it to the giver or to anyone.

If it were me, I’d accept the items and say “we will go through them at a later date” or “we will see if it’s something we’re able to use” and then store it. I wouldn’t use what you were uncomfortable with, and when they ask why you’re using a new stroller, I’d just say “my baby’s health and safety come first, and there was a recall on that product” and leave it at that. Obviously though the bigger issue is your husband being afraid to offend them. That’s a big convo y’all need to have because if you have any boundaries planned for this kid, such as no more than x amount of sugar or something, you best believe they’ll be saying to the kid “what mommy doesn’t know…” and that’s a concern.

you could always just say something of how grateful you are however some of these things no longer meet safety standards today, however you’d love to incorporate as much as you can, and even use some of the stuff as “props” for some pictures for keepsakes for her as you know how much it means to her to have this stuff used for your daughter.

When my family does this I just take it and toss it lol. Immediately to the trash.

Instead of focusing on people’s feelings, have him focus on the facts. Given your field of work, you’re both very aware of the risks. Baby comes first. Surely, even his family would understand this. Nothing is more important than the baby’s safety, especially not having your baby in a decades-old death trap just for them to go “aww, their daddy used that.”

Offer to keep some items as decor for the nursery or a photoshoot, but in terms of usable items like the bassinet, high chair, etc., get what you trust. Idk why babies become some sort of fun spectacle for grandparents.

NOPE.

Among all the stuff they hoard, is there anything that you can use safely now? I'm unhoarding my mom's attic, we found some treasures too. Strollers and stuff were out of service for 30+ years stored up there but we found toys, my old Barbies even if I'm expecting a boy and have a 10yo stepson. Baby clothes have been given away a very long time ago, I got second hands from friends and family and I'll get everything from my BFF she used 3 years ago when she had her daughter.

Anyway, I'm glad I also found vintage clothes to wear during pregnancy, especially my dad's, spare me the spending of maternity clothes and it feels good to share my pregnancy somehow with him, since he passed and won't know his grandchildren.

It’s always the only children! My husband and I both are, and this was a pregnancy long battle. If you find a solution to get them to stop let me know. My baby is almost 2 months and it’s still going on. My MIL is toxic and started so many arguments with me. I had to cut her off at the end of pregnancy because I couldn’t take it anymore.😒

Is there anything you can keep and use as cute storage or baby toys? We have a tiny wicker stroller that I let my kid use for her dolls. She gets a baby stroller, worst case scenario she breaks it and I get to throw it away lol.

Only other thing is check stuff for lead paint. We've had to deal with old furniture and I know it can be on toys too. Safety issue but also gives you an excuse to throw stuff out.

That’s a hard no. I would not even entertain that for one minute, and I would have no issue telling grandma that it’s very nice she held onto these things for you guys but safety standards have changed greatly, there’s plenty of resources out there showing the harm and death caused by these items, and you are therefore unable to use them. Or else seriously just take the items and take them to the dump, and if she ever asks about it, you can tell her why you threw it out. The items are gone and there’s nothing she can do about it.

My mom has been cleaning out her basement lately where she has also kept so many things from my childhood, and in an attempt to clean a booster seat for the dinner table, it straight up broke. Which was kind of a blessing to happen while I was cleaning it and not while my toddler was in it. My mom has been understanding in the sense that we don’t want to use everything from the 90s, and she also got a LOT of things second hand so who knows how old they actually are. I have been checking things over to see if they’re safe first or not and I’ve just been asking her to throw out any things that I’m not comfortable using, and she has been in agreement.

Please show your husband the associated safety reports with the items grandma is trying to give you guys. Idk why he thinks you and your family are exempt to accidents caused by unsafe baby gear.

When 1994 is considered vintage 😳 😢

Photoshoot. Take a "now and then" photoshoot when baby arrives ... what they actually use, vs what Dad did. Recreate some of Dad's classic photos. Get his mom and Grandma collectimg those photos That will be a balm. You will have an exit plan to move it on.

unfortunately i think you may have to take it upon yourself, because (and i apologize because this will be rude) he's chosen to be spineless about your child's safety. i hate to have to put in law relationships in jeopardy but baby safety isn't something a grown man should be rolling over, belly up to grandma about

I’d accept the vintage stuff and don’t use it and tell your husband to stop being afraid of his family. 🤷🏼‍♀️

I would toss some of it, especially the things you’re worried about the safety, and just say they broke. They might be like “well it wasn’t broken n MY care” - well too bad, it broke now and it’s gone.

My sibling wanted me to take “the family crib” that my step sister currently had, and it has that unsafe side to it that can potentially fall down. I said no thanks and he was upset I wouldn’t take it. But then my step sister apparently wouldn’t give it to me anyway and told him and my step dad so lol so I didn’t have to take it.

It can be really annoying when people offload their old shit onto you, I just had my first and I’ve been through it. I just wanted some nice things for my baby, not some dusty, broken, dented, chewed up shit that I have to take to be polite.

Donate/trash everything. She hoarded 30 year old baby items, she’s clearly not in her right mind if she thinks any of that crap is safe

You may not be on the same page with him but you do NOT need to keep that stuff! You’re allowed to disagree. But your boundaries are the only ones you can control.

If he’s okay with the possibility of your daughter getting injured then use them. Him working for cps and you too, he needs to use his brain and not his heart.

Personally, I would throw it away while no one is looking. And if anyone asks say "I'm not sure, honey where did you put the death stroller? What about the Full Send 5000 carseat? Are you sure you didn't put the bye bye baby bassinet in the spare room, I swear I just saw it the other day". I get where he is coming from, I really do. It's awkward to say no. But when it's literally 30-40 years old, it's a no. Would you buy a used 40 year old car? How about a 40 year old boat? Mobile home? Pair of shoes?

And gosh she saved the bottlleesssss. Like are they even bottles now?! Donate to an animal shelter lol.

Remember you and your baby come FIRST and you know what’s best. Never sacrifice you and your babies wellbeing for anyone else’s happiness. That being said, if it were me, I would let them know that it is unsafe and if they still push for you to take it, then take it to keep the peace and donate it! You don’t need more junk to stress you out with the new baby. I made it clear to my in laws that I’m very picky and do not want anything old at all. Plus old items hold energy im weird like that I like everything brand new. 

Just start giving the shit away. Not worth the fight- have him round it up for Salvation Army/Goodwill or whatever since he is too chicken to say no

im not expecting but when i will be my mom is the same way. she saved EVERYTHING !!! its all in pretty good condition, but its just not my style or cute. someone told me to just use the stuff when they come visit and not use it when they don’t. what they don’t know won’t hurt them. good luck !!!