The monster in the tree used to freak me the fuck out.

Caravan of Courage is fav Star Wars movie. This one not so much… but I did watch it growing up!

pop5656
1
4 days

Got 1. Deserved about an hundred over a good 20 years or so.

pop5656
2
4 days

I’m new to this but think I’m gonna go with “got my privilege revoked”

pop5656
OP
1
4 days

Thanks. IWNDWYT. And sorry for your loss as well.

pop5656
OP
1Edited
4 days

No. I had not been sober for the last 7 years. I had been drinking but was keeping it to a responsible limit for the most part. Although this last year I think it has been creeping up on me again in a bad way and it all kind of culminated in this episode.

It isn’t completely isolated however, as a few weeks ago, my wife and I got into an argument and I reached for a bottle and told her I was just going to get drunk in protest of the situation, and proceeded to drink. This was only interrupted by some family that showed up to the house so I slowed my roll and eventually stopped.

So despite being able to drink for the last 7 years occasionally, without more than a few bad episodes… this blackout scared the shit out of me, and I feel it’s time to stop taking risks “playing with fire”.

Thank you for the kind words and support.

pop5656
OP
1
4 days

Sticking to it this time! Forever!

pop5656
OP
3
4 days

Thank you. My kids have been my biggest motivator in life and I’m not gonna stop deriving motivation from them now. They keep my moral compass on point and I’m grateful for that. I’m glad you’re here too, being a parent and all. Time to cut these trauma chains or whatever the hell they are.

pop5656
OP
2
4 days

Yep. No more drowning in grief, shame, and sometimes anger. Time to climb out the bottle and find a better outlet! Thanks for your support.

pop5656
OP
3
4 days

Thanks for the recommendation. I’ll consider it. I do need to see a doctor soon!

pop5656
OP
6
4 days

Thanks. Yes. The shame is rough but I’m trying to just focus on the present and the future regardless of how pitiful I acted.