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I double dog dare a “new phone who dis” response !
You guys are my people!!! Savage! 🥰
"We understand completely.
"The board of directors has voted to replace the entire C-suite, effective immediately."
A vote of no confidence has occurred. We have determined that new leadership will result in a dramatic increase in shareholder value.
I’m cackling that’s so satisfying
😂🤣😂 I literally LOL’d and scared my half asleep husband! This is legit the funniest shit I’ve read on Reddit in ages!!
God that “my rules are final” is something straight out of my mother’s mouth. Both when I was a teen and now when I’m a grown ass adult who has been out of the house for a decade plus.
LOL send her your CV for Mother’s Day
Worth it.
Oh I love the “My mom, my friend” idea! So much good conversation to be had, there!
lol
Tell her you’re not interested in the position & thank her for the opportunity. /s
I find this text incredibly concerning. Have you considered going no contact? This is unhinged behaviour.
Sorry you have a mom like this! 🫂
I would go no contact. She wants you to worship her or something. She isn't God. BOW DOWN TO ME BECAUSE I BIRTHED AND RAISED YOU. Run.
This would literally get me off my ass to put a restraining order on her. I’d be f*ing reeling!
If I lived near her I would be looking for a new place. She has Villian Energy.
I’m reeling and I only read this as a total stranger!
Same. IYKYK. BPD Survivor edition.
Always about their overwhelming need to feel superior to their adult daughters and sons!
Ok that first line was when I started cackling 😂
😂 “the queen”
And in that moment I decided I identify as a French Revolution 🤣
Wheel out the guillotine and don’t forget the sawdust.
Bring out the tumbril!
She got that right, that’s for sure 😂
Right? Did she read Lawson’s book? 😂
If she did, there’d be a lot more language from the book, preemptively directed at you since she would pretend you’re borderline to gaslight you 😂
😂 it's the "head honcho" for me
she forgot to say the dictator and authoritarian*
Wow. Do any of you live with her? I was worried for any underage kids but then saw you are all adults. The fact that none of you can figure out what this impassioned diatribe is even about is *chef's kiss.*
The delusions of grandeur are strong in this one. Yikes. And as usual: another proof that it’s not about “fear of abandonment”, it’s about control.
Reply all: “hey guys, our mom parent is acting pretty deranged, amirite? Do you think it’s gotten worse since we were kids, or has she always been this unhinged? Leave comments here!”
Yeah this is a conversation all us siblings have had over the years. After our dad died we thought hoped prayed mom wouldn't be so squirrelly, but she got worse, we all thought dad was the worst parent, but it turns out it was our momster who was the most awful one, I mean dad was pretty bad but we somehow really thought that most of mom's issues were because of Dad and not her own issues separate from him. We all went very low contact and some of us went full no contact with Dad as soon as we turned 18, but we kept in contact a bit with mom because she convinced us she wasn't the monster that she was.
Now there are restraining orders and more therapy, tears and pain.
We had the same issue with my enabling FIL.
We thought he was the good parent and were almost happy for him when MiL passed away because she was so overtly mean and abusive…but it turned out he was (by far) the bigger villain of the two.
His ‘poor me/victim of the world’ schtick and selfishness has caused far more (and far deeper) damage to his kids than her obvious bullshit ever did.
We are realizing since my dad died, that he kept my moms TERRIBLE inside thoughts from becoming public, that he protected her SUPER naive ass from being conned by every snake oil salesman and choosing beggar in town, and that he helped stop her from letting her potentially bad choices become long term problems for the rest of us! He also kept her from becoming a slumlord and minimized her shopaholic hoarding tendencies…
Enabler though and through
If my incubator weren't so homicidal, I would ask if you were my sib from another crib. It's amazing how manipulative and awful these folks can be and then be so utterly naive. Incubator has sort of become a slumlord after buying a little set of apartments from a man whose word she took without question when he swore that all of the tenants were amazing, paid their rent on time, never made messes, always took care of their pets, and all of the plumbing, wiring, insulation, windows, doors, and roofs were absolutely spic, span, and ready to serve. And she just... believed that. And waived her right to inspection, and didn't interview any of the tenants. Did your mom do similar?
They’ve had the units a long time, and dad always handled the details. He taught me how to do the same.
She just will ignore the tenants for days or even weeks when there’s a major repair she doesn’t think is necessary or it’s costly, or she thinks that a temporary fix like space heaters or a mini fridge is a sufficient solution for weeks or months on end because she either forgets or it too overwhelmed to deal with or doesn’t know how to address or who to call, or if her super cheap guy is scheduled out or no shows because he forgot too. Like she will never call a regular company, it’s alway a cheap fly by night or some guy with tools, never a national or local chain!
Or she will try to get my brother or myself to come up and do the work for her for free.
She burns through contractors and lawn guys because she pushes them to do things cheap, or in addition to the job they’ve already budgeted the time for, or she complains about them not doing stuff she expects that they should include after the fact or that she assumed was part of the job they were hired to do- even if it’s something completely unrelated or outside the scope of their jobs.
That's awful. I'm sorry that you and your brother - and the tenants - have to deal with that
He and I both told her she’s on her own with his latest bonehead move!
She gets free legal advice from me, but refuses to listen. Than she bitches when I make her pay for my time when she has a crisis and I have to put paying clients I desperately need to get paid my to make my bills on hold to do her nonsense. But guess what, when she has to pay me, she actually listens and does as she’s instructed! She still doesn’t realize that she created that necessary dynamic all on her own!
That is amazing boundary keeping. Superb work, friend!
“Is it time to consider putting her in a home?”
That time has loooong passed, I'm afraid. (I'm also afraid for even the hard-core nursing home employees!)
Can we add this one to the "Official BPD Survivors Handbook"? Under RED FLAGS.
I was reading this thinking you have to still be underage. I remember that kind of talk and how helpless it feels as a child to have no say.
But she's saying this to adults? She thinks she gets to control you forever? Oh wait, they do... but I didn't think they'd say it out loud!
Well you have it in writing at least. Haha And the part about how you can't call her out on anything she does. Wow
Wow. She actually called herself the queen. That’s priceless! This right here is why you work hard to stay independent of them physically, emotionally and financially. I don’t know who she thinks she’s “parenting” with this baloney, but it isn’t adult children who are independent of her.
It's my opinion that some parents do not know how to stop being parents. I actually said that to an estranged father not long ago. (He didn't respond well.) When a child is an adult, their mother/father is no longer in charge. Some of them don't seem to know how to get used to it. Some hang onto the role -- sounds like your mother is one -- and end up pushing their children father away.
true. though with mine, I'm not sure they were ever truly parents to begin with...
SAME! 🎯
Part of what led to no contact was my father assuming I was sleeping with a friend he didn’t approve of and sending me messages saying he’s my father, so he has a right to put a stop to all this and to have some say in who I sleep with or not. I was 25.
Sort of a textbook case of a parent staking an authority that he no longer has.
A leader without followers is just some person taking a walk.
I wouldn't even acknowledge a word of it.
It's not parenting, it's a totalitarian regime. Welcome to borderlinistan 😂
This is the country flag 🚩
😂
borderlinistan
This is gold.
Oh god this sounds like my mother lol. She constantly says she’s supposed to be “my world” & the “most important person in my life” like girl im 24 and live with my partner… please
These type of unhinged texts are what the thumbs up emoji was made for
“I am your QUEEN don’t question me!!!!! My rule is lawwwww!!!” “👍”
"k"
Wait, you're adults????
Ohdear. Mom is in for a rude awakening!!
Yeahhh, if my mother did this before I went NC, I'd say "uh, actually I'm an adult with complete autonomy and will do what I please"
How would she react if someone responded with a laughing emoji? Knowing that you’re all adults, this is almost funny.
Gotta love when they try to put their foot down in their delulu sky castle and there's just nothing there to support it.
You are my dolls. I decide what you wear and where you sit. You cannot leave, I own you. I made you so I know everything about you, while you know nothing about anything.
You are an adult human being only in your own mind and in the eyes of the law, but if you think for one minute I am not going to be controlling your every move and speaking every word for you, you're crazy.
You are my doll. I will pose you as I please.
Please give your mother some large rolls of twine and some sticks for Mother's Day, with a copy of this rant attached with a pretty bow
Also, consider painting bright pink circles on all the sibs cheeks, in case she struggles to get the meaning of the gift.
Did any of you reply? I would love to hear it.
I asked her if she had anything specific she wanted me to do she said nothing, one of my siblings argued basically saying she’s ridiculous, the other one didn’t answer.
The sad part is she genuinley feels like that so unless you bow down to her anything you say or do will upset her. Extremely irrational, unreasonable, and certainly a good way to have your kids not want to be around you!
I’ve been in this sub for years, and I really think this is one of the most egregious messages I’ve seen.
AND OP said it’s only the first half of her message! 🤡😹
So, not for nothing... but I would be SOOOO tempted to create a small Mother's Day project for her...
Specifically, a Brady Bunch - styled table [like the one in the show intro]... with pictures matching each of her self-proclaimed titles.....
Google.com image search and Word Processor are your friends.
So, for example, imagine if you will....:
[Top Center Alinged, in Bold, Script Front, Above the Table of "Titles with Pictures"]:
I AM Your.......
[Then... the table with the pictures and her self-proclaimed titles]
⭐MOTHER [her "title" typed at the top of a picture of Mommy Dearest - the bathroom cleaning scene looking crazy AF]
⭐ THE QUEEN [...you know that part of Disney's animated Alice In Wonderland where the Queen of Hearts is red in the face, screaming, and holding the flamingo??? ... ya, that picture]
⭐ THE PRESIDENT [So, obviously a very unflattering cartoon depiction of whoever she DOES NOT support]
⭐ The Captain [a very drunk, unflattering, image of Captian Jack Sparrow... the more obsurd, the better]
⭐ THE LEADER [... im thinking the cartoon depiction of the three blind mice leading each other.... then write Mom 1, Mom 2, and Mom 3 on each mouse]
⭐ THE CEO [ bonus points if you can find a photo of a certain woman who was famous for her Tv show and magazines about home design, gardening, and hosting... until she was arrested for insider trading - not naming any names because I am not sure if its allowed... or Google "CEO Scandel... choices are endless😉]
⭐ THE COO [same search procedure as the CEO]
⭐ THE HEAD [...omg... just let your imagination go wild for that one😆]
⭐THE CHEIF [Barney Fife from the Andy Griffin Show]
⭐ THE SUPERVISOR [again....endless options]
⭐ THE PRINCIPAL [ooohhhh.... the principal lady from the 1990s movie Matilda with Danny Devito]
⭐ THE HEAD HONCHO [look up "head honcho stock photos... there's some potential there 😆]
⭐ THE BOSS [💯 gotta do a "Boss Baby" reference here]
⭐ THE PERSON IN CHARGE [let your imagination run wild!!]
⭐ THE BABYSITTER [up to you... but I might even put a picture of a TV Set here]
⭐THE DIRECTOR [... skys the limit on this one too]
[Then....BELOW THE TABLE, BOTTOM LEFT ALIGNED, BOLD, SCRIPT FONT]: "Get Where I'm Going With This??"
[Bottom Centered] Love, YOUR ADULT CHILDREN
-Then print it as large as you can.... frame it... wrap it in a box with a beautiful bow and Mothers Day card.... bonus points if she opens it in front if your sibling 😆🤣🤣🤣🤣😈😈😈😈😈😈
ETA: TRIPPLE Bonus Points if the card says something along the lines of: "This year I think I finally got you the gift that you deserve"🤣🤣
ETA #2: Full disclosure, I probably would never had the courage to actually do this.... but it sure is fun to live vicariously through a fantasy where you did 🤣🤣
Best thing I've read all day!!!! 👍🤣🤣🤣
At least she's honest about believing herself to be an authority on all things? 🤣
Usually it isn’t relevant or useful, but honestly I’m slightly curious which thought process led her to the keyboard on this one, especially if it’s a non-sequitur. Because yeah, out of the blue to her adult children…this is quite funny.
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23d
unfortunately it’s her writing. she always texts long paragraphs, I only put the first 1/2 of the message.
The day before we moved my father into a hospice facility, he was screaming at me and telling me "I AM STILL THE LAW IN THIS HOUSE!" while tapping his finger on the table. I felt your post viscerally. All you can do is laugh, sigh, shrug your shoulders, and walk away.
“So all sales are final? I can’t return you as a defective parent?”
hit her with an "Unsubscribe". Yowza
Lmfao!
Literally called herself a queen. Gave herself her own BPD label.
My authoritarian aging mother pulled this act on me.
She truly thinks I shake in my boots and that intimidates me.
Obviously she was really needing some Grade A fuel.
I just ignored her tantrum and went NC immediately after.
🥱
“Why don’t my kids ever call me?” - the mom in 10 years
"Anyone who must must say "I am the Queen" is no true queen.."
Print it out and stick it in a generic Mother’s Day card.
Lol.
Strongs OP!
Lolololol. OK....someone's on a wee power trip lmao. Although she did just 100% put in writing the actual psychological profile of a cluster B.... I'm the queen...it's all about me. I'm the centre of the universe. I do no wrong. Bow subjects. 🙇♀️ take it up the ass as I deliver it.... Ugggh 🤦♀️
Ahh man, she really let it out with this one. I have a few messages that are in the same vein as this. Received them at 30 years old. Honestly, I started getting these insanely heavy-handed messages once they realized I was no longer willing to accept their behavior.
It's almost like they stopped trying to filter their abusive language when they knew they couldn't get away with it anymore.
To me, this reads as desperate behavior to control the narrative when they know they've lost you. I hope this means you're on your way to healing. Whatever that looks like for you and your siblings.
I've been no contact for 8 months. It gets better 💗
It's sad when an adult -at their big age- still doesn't understand what being a parent is and what parenting entails. Her view of it is completely skewed. It's all about her and her "power" ??
I'm glad you all are adult and you can laugh about it now :3
Welcome!
I would respond with a laughing emoji and possibly a string of laughing .gifs. What hilarity.
queen (monarchs, generally): historically, if they're abusing their power and they cut off all input, may lead to assassination, revolution, or otherwise getting dethroned
president: an elected position with term limits and checks on power; isn't gonna get that much done if she can't play nice with other branches of government. if abusing power, may lead to getting impeached (etc)
captain: among other factors, the rise of piracy in the late 1600s was fueled by captains on naval and merchant vessels abusing their crews - resulting in mutiny
CEO: board of directors/trustees can oust her, shareholders can do a hostile takeover, workers can strike
if her cluster b fantasy involves having infinite, absolute, unchecked power over other human beings (sure Jan) then something like "tyrant" or "dictator" would be more accurate. I wonder why she didn't use those? (ikik, that's rhetorical ;) )
Low key it reads like some weird text chain thing that our abusive moms would share on Facebook. Does she always talk like that?
She always talks like that
Reply with a classic “unsubscribe.”
I need to know what the response was hahaha
This is totally unhinged
Yikes 😬 delusional!!!
Seems like an “I quit” is in order 😉
Off with her head 😂 💀
Sounds like my mom. The only logical response is like, 10 eyeroll emojis.
“lol okay mom”
Drunk. On. Power.
Wow what a power trip. I'm so sorry, and it's also so familiar
Omg this is next level INSANITY. If she’s the boss, the CEO, the queen… I quit
WTF
While it would still be quite problematic if you were a dependent, legal minor, the fact that she is talking to an adult makes it apparent that she is a highly delusional and unhinged person.
I heard my mother's voice reading this!
What a delusional bitch.
what the holy hell ?? that’s funny but also SAD!
Wow.
Damn did we have the same mom?
Your mom has been reading too much boss babe mlm stuff on Facebook.
I read this in my mother’s voice. I’m so sorry OP
Oh, classic!!
Man my mom speaks like this, but she isn’t text or email savvy. I would LOVE to post her authoritarian behaviour online, but she doesn’t leave proof anywhere.
Hope you’re doing okay OP.
I'd reply with "sorry, I don't negotiate with terrorists." She sends absurd message?she gets absurd repky.
She really went all in. Wow!
Oh my!!!
This is disgusting.
I thought for sure this was a tirade after three teenagers decided to, you know, be teenagers… nope. Adults. Adult children. 😳😵
I wouldn’t even bother responding to her when she starts this shit.
I got a headache reading through all of her job titles.
Is your mother Kim Jong Un?
🤣
Give her your 2 weeks notice 💁🏼♀️
Boss Baby
Respond with “you get to choose how to parent, I get to choose how to respond”, and let the shit sling lol. Then block.
My dad pulled this shit on me shortly before I turned 30. We dont talk anymore lol.
Sadly, time to walk away and go no contact. I would reply to this simply saying, “There is no need to discuss your parenting. We are adults. Your parenting days are over. THIS kind of declaration of yours is not appropriate. THIS is why I cannot have anymore contact with you. Please seek therapy.” And then cut all contact completely.
"We get exactly where you are going with this. We just haven't yet made a decision on which nursing home it'll be."
Time to submit your formal letter of resignation to the CEO
I accidentally read ‘the head nacho’ and was like “what the hell is that thing now?” Anyway, yeah, pretty pitiful to see an adult acting like that.
Lol totally something my mother would text 🤣
My God. This sounds like the three day lecture I endured when I had the audacity to date someone my parents didn't approve of at the age of 29. My dad kept calling me "rebellious." I couldn't move for financial reasons, and I'm pretty sure it took years off my life.
Just Bartleby that ish. "I prefer not to." She's ridiculous.
“Wow. What on earth are you on about mum?”
The" I'm not going to put up with blank anymore" is so funny to me as an adult. Like what is she going to do? Not pick up the 0 calls she receives from me or not let me into her house that I haven't been to in over a year? As the kids say, womp. womp.
My god! I thought my mother wrote that!
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
My mom is a very different borderline. She’s a hermit/waif and more timid. But I recognize the general spirit of the message. It’s the same underlying BPD. Sometimes my mom’s borderline events are triggered by really stressful things going on in her life that have nothing to do with me. I’m just a bystander caught in the crossfire and a convenient victim. But wow, this is pretty bad. I’m sorry you received this message. Although it’s so over the top and ridiculous, it does (hopefully) provide some laughs. Sometimes, humor is the best coping mechanism when dealing with BPD. As a side- I have often saved a lot of text and voicemails from my mom because she doesn’t always remember what she says or texts in her rages. Then I can calmly present the facts later when she wants to know why I set up a boundary or don’t want to be affectionate. Interestingly, my very non-BPD mother in law has often said that if you raise your kids right, then you do get to be friends when you are adults.
my mom sounds like that… these just randomly happen and she will seemingly “forget” it happened
I feel like I read somewhere it has something to do with the borderline “rage.” Or some kind of disassociation. It’s been a few years since I went on my BPD reading journey and my memory is a bit hazy on some of these details. But it’s so affirming to see how others have similar bizarre experiences with their parents. Experiences where you are just so flabbergasted!
God damn. How old are you?
all college age
That's insane she thinks she still controls you this way. I'm a bit surprised you haven't gone NC. I understand that's a deeply personal decision. However, no human ever deserves this. Fuck off, lady. Geez. I truly wish you well dealing with this. That's abhorrent.
She’s kinda just a yapper. I can ignore it pretty easily.
I REALLY hope you’re all out of home or can be soon!
Just curious- if you can’t think of anything that prompted this, is there any real possibility of hallucinations or psychotic break or something? Dementia? Seems just really extreme out of the blue.
No lmao
More likely that it’s a completely made up scenario that she has been stewing over for several days.
Way too heavy handed regardless but overall mental. In some cultures though I do know parents like that
The way she literally said "the queen"💀 Christine Anne Lawson wya girlie
invite her to the block party
OP how old are you?(you don’t have to respond) If you are old enough (legal) you can leave the house and not live with this
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Heavy handed and full of red flags if you were a bunch of dependent teens.
Literally laughable when you are adults.
I doubledog dare you to give her a boss’s day card this Sunday.
For more limited fireworks, one that reads “My mom, my friend”.