What age did you move out?
16th birthday, my dad dropped me off at a shelter.
Fuk
You didn't deserve that.
Yeah, it definitely had a big part to play on the poor choices I made to get by.
Hope you found your peace and happiness.
You most definitely deserve that
I appreciate that. I'm trying, but life definitely likes to throw curve balls. At least I am persistent.
Those curve balls suck and they hurt like hell. But it does pay off to be stubborn here.
You'll get there 🫶
🖤 can only try, right?
That's right 💚
That’s all we can do, is try. And persisting you are. Even with Life’s frankly fucky curve balls, you transcend. I am instrumented burden that fell on you at such a young age. You seem like a beautiful soul that’s seen far more than a man has. I could never imagine. I’m 26M. And I have a drug addiction and you’ve inspired me so much to keep persisting.
I'm glad I inspired you. I've seen too much in all honesty. To the point I just stay home now and don't do much but work sleep and repeat. I've struggled with addiction myself. I've died a few times, but for some dumb lucky reason, I'm still here today. I got clean because my life became a horror movie, and I had to get away, or something very bad was going to happen. I sometimes forget how scary it was and want to fall back on old habits. But I know if I do that, I'll lose everything I've worked so hard to have today. I haven't seen my dad in 9 years, his choice. I get a text every couple of months, I reply, and then I don't hear from him in another few months. When he dropped me off he told me I need to learn the hard way, even though he was the one who glorized his using days which made me see it in a good way rather than telling me how horrible it can be.
They said you have a “beautiful soul” based solely on a couple comments when you’re another stranger online…they’re also a satanists
Fuck man I'm really sorry to hear that
Thanks. It was a long time ago, I've grown numb, but it definitely affected me emotionally and mentally, but it's a work in progress to work through the trauma. Rome wasn't built in a day.
Was that the last time you had contact with your dad? When you were 16?
Do you mean when I last saw him or spoke to him?
Either one. Have you spoken to him in person or over the phone since he dropped you off at 16?
Yeah, he's my dad. He's invited me to his cottage a couple of times. But I haven't seen him in person for years, and our communication has died down to 1 text every couple of months.
If you don't mind me asking, why were you dropped off? Is that even legal(where you live)? Was he tired of you, did he just not want you in the first place,...? Also, were was your mother in this? Or do you not have one (anymore)? I'm sorry if you don't want to answer, then you don't have to.
Yeah, it's legal here. It was a shelter that started at the age of 16 for youth. He was tired of me. My mom and dad would kick me out to the other house every couple of years. My mom kicked me out to my dads cause some guy took what he wanted and I got pregnant at 15, so then at my dads had a miscarriage and had a hard time dealing with that so I was smoking weed to cope. I wasn't sneaking out at night or anything like that. And then I was old enough to go to a shelter.
Oh man, that's rough. I hope you're doing well now.
Yeah, I have a home of my own and employed, doing much better. Thank you,
Great to hear. If you ever feel down, remember some stranger on the internet is hoping for you to do better.
Were you in Nebraska around 2008 when this happened?
Nebraska temporarily had a "safe haven law" that interpreted the age of a child as under 18. So 35 children were given up during this period, some of them teenagers and 5 kids were from out of state. I sorta find it hilarious and sad. Hilarious cause the state didn't think to include an age limit in it.
I don't know though. If my parents went through something like that I feel like I'd be better without them. I'm sure it's not easy for you though.
That's crazy, I never even heard of that? No, I'm not from Nebraska. That is insane though! They must have rethought what law when older kids were dropped off.
Yeah, I definitely don't need them. That was a long time ago, though. I have worked on my relationship with my mom, and she has put it the work to be better, although she can cross a line sometimes. Still a work in progress I guess.
Yea they changed the law like 4 months later to read "allowing only infants up to 30 days" lol
Hahaha, of course they did. omg that's horrible.
I'm mixed opinion on the "safe haven law". If the parent's don't want the child, even as a teen, the parent's aren't meant to be parents. But they are likely better than giving them to the state to live life in foster homes and whatever. The parent at least has enough self awareness that they are not the best for them, or can't support them, but they are likely better than foster care and such cause of their awareness. It's the abusive parents that wouldn't go through this process, I would think anyway.
Anyway, I hope you're doing good.
Ipone
The abusive parents would probably keep their kids because of the child bonus they get every month.. i hear what you're saying. On the one hand, they do not have the means to take care of their kids they drop them off. And then, on the other hand, those kids get abandonment issues, and it feels like no one loves them and are alone in the world. Doesn't give them much of a chance in when they aren't taught how to survive on their own.
I'm doing good. The long weekend is over and back to work. I hope you're going good too!☺️
Day I turned 18 mother told me I’m an adult now. So get the hell out before she calls the police.
If you don't mind me asking, why? Was she mean to you before that, or you to her? Or was it just suddenly: get out? Do you still see her or was that the last time?
Last time and both were always extremely abusive. I have vague memories when really small regarding my father. If those memories are real then her big issue with me is she saw me as a rival for my father. Which when considering other behaviors of hers then I wouldn’t be surprised if that was part of the reason.
Sorry to hear. Hope you're doing good.
- It was 1995. Got a job bouncing at a club and the pay was great. $500 a week after taxes. What a time to be alive.
Did u meet/hookup with alot of ladies?
I was a whore. Then they made me a bartender and it got even worse.
The day I turned 18!!
14 moved into shed in backyard. 17. Moved 250kms away. Didn't get along with old man.
That's rough, do you still see him or have you cut contact completely?
He passed about 4 yrs ago. Worked things out as best we could. 20yrs ago. I did it for mom.
Well, at least you tried to reconcile. So it does kinda end happy.
You stayed in the shed till 17? It wasn't cold during the winter in there?
I had a job as well as school. Used a propane furnace for heat.
18, moved across the country for college.
I moved out at 19, lived with my boyfriend for 2 years, then he broke up with me, so I moved back home at 21, then moved out after 2 months
I moved out at 17. Had a job, rented a room, got on with life.
Must’ve got lucky finding a place, did you stay at friends house? Cause without even a little credit I’d doubt someone would let you rent
Yep, I rented a room from a friend's mom in their house.
Lucky, I had to live in my car for couple months, which was my peak, when I moved back with my family I met an all time low, working on myself tho, gotta stay strong 💪🏽 🐎
22 got myself a studio apartment
18 to go to college. Only came back home one summer, but haven't lived there since then. Would have been welcome there but staying summers at school was more fun and I got to keep my jobs that way, and take summer classes which knocked a whole semester off of my degree.
Which time? Ha! I moved out at 18. Thought I knew everything and how the world was. No.. NO I did NOT.
Moved back at 22 or 23... moved out again at 25. BUT that was a move to the GF(at the time) and her mother's place. Left there at 27. To live with my uncle. Than I moved in with the next GF and her family. Than she and I bought a house. I was 28/29 years old.
When I had thousands of dollars in my account years old.
22
Right before my 17th birthday. My parents moved to Texas and I wasn’t about to leave California after they had moved us like so many times before so I stayed.
- in 2009. made a bunch of cash online and moved across the country trying to run from my life. wasn't a great idea in retrospect. missed a lot.
18
18
16 and got married.
16 in 1979 to go to college
- Had my first apartment downtown at 16. Lived in a tent city for two years before that. Wild times.
I never moved out. My mom moved out when I was 22, and I now own the house. I uno reversed that one real quick.
Wow..well good for u? I hope
15, found out I was pregnant, got a job and a place with the father of my child.
Unofficially at 18 when I went to college. Dropped out, then at 22 when I moved to the city to go to a different college.
- Got an apartment with a roommate that was advertising in the newspaper lol roommate wanted the section. Yes that was a long time ago.
15
20 I got a two bedroom with my girlfriend at the time in the city close to the small town we grew up in. 3 month later my mom got a job in the city and asked to be our roommate lol
18
24, I had banked scholarship and loan money and moved in PT with my partner.
17
19
14, worked for an uncles construction company hanging iron, then went to building dams and bridges
12
33 years old. I'm not ashamed of it, it took a long time to claw my way out of the hole from the Great Recession and get my ducks in order so I could finally buy a home. I was lucky that my parents were open to me living with them (for 25% of my income in rent, not free) so that I could save up without having to lock into a lease. I was also lucky that my wife was willing to live with me in that arrangement while we saved up (she also paid 25%).
We also managed to buy our home right before interest rates and home prices went bonkers after 2021. I don't think that we could afford to do it now, or at the very least it would take a while to save up enough to offset the massive interest cost.
Don't worry I'm 28M and still live with my parents I have a good job and help my parents by paying rent every week but like people keep telling me how much I'll have peace when I live on my own
I lived with my mom until she died, when I was in my early 40s. I looked at it more like having a roommate rather then living with my mom. I also had a disabled brother that she took care of 24/7 so she was never really financially independent.
If you're paying rent it's more like roommates to me. I was roommates with my mom most my life.
24, found a couple buddies had a spare room and they offered to rent it to me for $350 a month. that included utilities and cable internet. man that was cheap
I was told to leave at 18, after i ran up a 1200$ phone bill. because back then long distance wasn't free
- A very violent divorce including gunfire saw me leave and live under a park bench for nearly a year.
17, left for army, turned 18 at basic training. No problems at home, just didn't have a plan for college and didn't want to be a burden.
17 for college per European-American standard
Wait....you're suppose to move out 🙃
Depends what counts as "moving out." Left for college at 18, switched schools and moved back in at 20, left again for law school at 23, came back for the bar exam and job hunting at 26, moved out for good at 27.
At 19. Idiot mom allowed her cheating husband to kick me out. Because his two bio kids had moved out because my mom was getting on their nerves, which I get. As far as I could ascertain he felt that since his kids were not in the house I didn't need to be. It's not like I was doing anything wrong. I was in college taking 20 credits, worked part time and did volunteer work. He was just a prick. A couple years after being kicked out, I went no contact with my mom for 12 years. We later reconnected, then I went low contact for a few years. Now I am back to no contact and I am happy to leave her on that status for the rest of my life. She adds nothing positive to my life. Interacting with her is pure drudgery.
- Bad situation at home.
Yeah I got kicked out.
25 but it should’ve been 18 looking back
18 and never looked back!
21 and newly wed.
16, almost 17.
Been trying to move out for the past year or so, but I can't because my narc parents boxed me in... I turned 28 last month
24, in 1995.
Just graduated 3 months earlier from college which was an easy commute from home (22 miles). I paid a small amount of rent to my parents the last 2-3 years.
Never went back. (Well kind of but it was for 3 months between old lease and moving 700 miles away).
I’m fortunate to have supportive parents (dad and step mom) and have always gotten along with them.
18
Kicked out on 17th birthday.
Do not get a parent doing this. Your brain is NOT even finished growing. I could not sleep at night knowing. Mykid is struggling to find. A place to sleep. No way
- Worked 3 jobs to get by
I moved out just before my 16th birthday d
First move-out was at 23, but I moved in with a partner, so I wasn't living alone.
Moved back in for a few months at 27 after the break-up to save on rent and build up a little cash reserve for paying bond on rental properties, then I went back out and lived on my own properly that year.
Holy crap that was a big difference between moving straight in with a partner and living on your own. Looking back I 100% should've moved out solo first, I feel like I didn't become a proper adult until I made that step.
I was looking for a place to live on my own at 23 anyway and the girl I was seeing had a place that was really close to my office, so I started spending nights there to save on the commute, and one thing led to another. But in hindsight definitely should've flatted on my own for a bit first.
18 told to hit the road
- 3 days after HS graduation left for bootcamp
19
17.
When I joined the military at 19.
18.
15 and emancipated at 16. I still cry when I think about the judge who signed the order and his kind words for me and stern words for my parents.
17 Army
- My mom passed when I was 26 and I became my dad and brother’s maid. I’m 31 now and want to move back to save money and spend time with dad while he’s here. But it’s just so much better for my mental health to live elsewhere.
20
18.
19
17
I moved out at 19. I just couldn't stand my home anymore, my parents would have let me stay, but I butted heads with my dad, and I wanted freedom. It may not have been a good choice financially, but I was done.
- Wish I could've done it sooner without it being a pain in the backside.
19
Left my stable life at mom's place to go life with dad at 16, I hated school and it was the only thing she cared about. Dad and I bounced around after the house got foreclosed. Mom died when I was 20 and I got a lump sum life insurance payout. Left dad then and lived off that with no job for ~5 years while staying with a friend. Got my first real job at a callcenter when I was 25.
Moved out at age 23...
20 years old moved out when my sister did
17
I would also be curious to know what country people are from. Because I think the people answering at the moment are Americans, who seem to move out at a younger age than people from other countries. But I don't know. There seem to be so many people on Reddit who are still living with their parents in their late 20s and early 30s. I want to know what country they're from and what their cultural traditions are. I think that makes a difference. Besides, it's just interesting.
And I would also be curious to know how old the answerers currently are. Because I think those of us who are older moved out at a younger age than people who are now in their 30s and younger. And that's interesting, too.
I was thinking the opposite actually.
Like the ones who say they were kicked out before 18, that would be illegal in any state in the US, at least today. Until they are 18 with a few exceptions, but the exception are even older, up to 21. The parents of anyone under 18 are still responsible for that child. And like a 16 year old can't move out on their own legally without parents consent or some other exception, marriage or going to court and going through "legal emancipation".
You're forgetting those of us who started college at 17 or younger. I left home for college at 17 and never lived at home ever again, though my parents "helped" me now and then financially until I was 26 when I started my first professional job. That was pretty normal for young people back in the 80s.
Yea I wasn't quite sure on that rule and may vary state to state. Aren't they somewhat still responsible for you as long as you're still schooling? Even older than 18? Like they can still claim you as a dependent on their taxes? So they are still responsible.
I would hope that when any human graduates from high school or hits 18 they would want to grow up and become a fully functional adult and support themselves for the most part and leave home and live on their own and learn about the wider world. Why extend your dependent childhood???
I just did a quick google and this is what I'm referring to:
"However, to claim a college student as a dependent on your taxes, the Internal Revenue Service has determined that the qualifying child or qualifying relative must: Be younger than the taxpayer (or spouse if MFJ) and: Be under age 19, Under age 24 and a full-time student for at least five months of the year."
If the parent of said college student is claiming them as a dependent then the parent is still legally obligated to support them financially and their healthcare. If they aren't doing either then it's tax fraud.
14 for school. Wasn't allowed home more then 1x a month. Dorm was shit and I went trough a lot of traumatic stuff in there. At 17 I started moving around for jobs to keep my family up float, sometimes crashing few months with my brother untill I'd get a different job. Ended up moving to a different country at 19,lived in a shared house for some time then moved with my sister to help her with childcare(she was a single mother). Moved out at 23 to a studio and now at 25 I am about to move in with my future wife and kid.
- Ran away from home with a girl.
17, didn't look back.
18 from my parents place. Then back in at 22 after college. Then 22 again to move in with my now wife. Lived together for 7 years. Then moved to her parents for 3 years and then moved out again.
I’m lucky to have a great family and support system.
mine kicked me out day after my 18th birthday because she wouldn’t be receiving child support from my dad. dad threatened to kick me out due to me not being in school at the time and not being in what he considered an “adult” job. sure retail doesn’t provide a completely stable wage depending on the department or level, but i wasn’t going to be getting his definition of an adult job with the experience i had from 18-19 that i constantly tried to build on. he charged me rent + utilities for 7 months when i was 19 until my at-the-time boyfriend’s parents let me live with them rent free during one of our long-distance visits with each other. flash forward to December and February where my now husband had a conversation with his mother and her petty behavior towards me and actions i should’ve known to take, as well as mistakes and being forgetful on my part i could have avoided, and she threatened to kick me out as well, then after loading my car that night she called me back in and talked about how “she didn’t actually kick me out”. i wish her the best, but after that night and feeling the way i did at my dad’s, it made me lose the desire i once had for us to have a good mother and daughter-in law relationship. im now finally living happily with the love of my life after doing long distance for over a year and suffice to say, i should’ve moved in with him over a year ago when he originally proposed the idea.
17, just before my 18th, moved back in with my parents for a few months after my divorce in 2019, they saved my life doing that for me
I moved out at 18 but now I'm still living alone and dating eva ai virtual gf bot
23 but techincally I didn't move out my family did
20, moved closer to my university
Move out you say? Jokes aside I was 20. Lost my job and fiancé about 6ish years ago when I was 28 and moved back in with my mom. Still there….but I got a cat so that wins I guess 😂
18 I guess... On my 16th birthday I got sent to a tti program. I went home 10 months later, got kicked out right before I turned 17. My aunt let me stay with her indefinitely but I left on my 18th birthday
28
- Been on my own 32 years.
16... kinda moved out, it wad with my older sister, been on and out of home a few times since
19
Both my parents moved out before me, at 14 I was living on my own. They did send me money and help out. And I met with both occasionally. One moved to another city, one to another country. I kinda liked it actually
20
In 1979 I left home at 16 for 8 months, back home at 17 for a couple months, back out and then kind of couch surfing until I was close to 18 and started renting a room in a house with a couple students. Started relationship with the man who would become my first husband and then we got our own place.
17, mum and I had been at eachothers throats for years. She couldn't parent or control me, and resorted to anger and frustration in her failure. And I was absolutely volatile towards authority, and made sure to cause havoc for her life if she tried to do so in mine.
One day i just said fuck it got a place and left within a week, Was the healthiest thing for both of us.
Unofficially at 18 to go to college. Officially, at 22 when I got my first "real" job after graduation and I moved into my own apartment.
17 totally my choice always had a great relationship with my parents and much younger siblings
20.
Had a big “fuck you ,I’m out of here.” with my folks and left. The circumstances following led me to meet my wife a couple of months later, so I guess it worked out for the best.
15 I ran away, was tired of getting my ass kicked
Yikes, that socks. You deserved better, DC.
Tell you what, I am 54, moved out at 19. There are tons of young people nowadays 20 to 30 plus still living with parents. Really crazy. Nothing like your own place.
I didn’t want to live with then boyfriend, now husband before we were married. Not because of religious reasons or I was worried about what people thought. I was content with how things were and had no pressure to leave at any point by my parents.
I was living at home and working full time in my career in healthcare paying my bills for my car, insurance, gas, clothing.. I wasn’t responsible for paying for the bills in the house or paying rent.
I wouldn’t have changed a thing. I learned so much as a young adult living at home with my parents that when it was time to get married & have our own place it was a seamless transition.
I was 19; went to college a few hours away
16
I graduated high school when I was 17. My mom and sister moved out of town where I was working. I moved in with college-age coworkers. They loved it, because mom donated all the food from the freezer to the.
I think I was 19
i moved out for school at 18 came back in the summers then moved to a different state for a yr- covid happened moved home. by the time i was 22/23 i moved out w a roommate. now at 25 i live alone :) i could never live at my moms again my mental health would decline
I was kicked out at 16
21.
18, I aged out of the system, couldn’t stay any longer
17... All I ever wanted to do from my earliest memory was get a driver's license, get a job and move out. High 5 ✋️
- Me and my best friend decided to move to NYC to party and do cool shit. Lived there for 6 years no ragrets
I was 19, my husband was 17. Both of us moved out to attend college; neither of us ever moved back home.
- Went to college a state away near my boyfriend's college. Moved in with him the day I graduated. Still together today at 29, and now he's my husband.
18 but in my head I moved out when I was 5.
18, went to military, I feared if I didn’t act fast I’d be stuck in my hometown like everyone else forever. (that’s what happened to my older brothers)
23
23 when my ex was pregnant and we wanted our own space.
- Right after I graduated college and I've gone wherever the Army tells me since then.
17 to attend college out of of province.Unfortunately I boomeranged back because of student debt. :(
17
22
- Bought a condo with my boyfriend of 4 years. (Moving away for college is not really a thing where I am from). We still live together 11 years later :)
The week I turned 18, only allowed to keep the clothes I wore to school that Friday. According to my mother it was her time now because she put her life on hold having a child at 20 despite easily half that time I was living with my grandmother or aunts. In and out of jail, stole any birthday/holiday money I ever received, never willing to help with my schoolwork, didn't go to any of my wrestling matches but hey she got sober eventually so in her mind she fulfilled her side of the parent/child contract.
18, as I went to college and got my own place when I got back.
Weekend of my 19th birthday. Stayed out for about 10 years, then moved back in with mom for a couple years to save up the down-payment for the house I live in/own now at 46 yrs old.
16
22ish. Very early 20s.
-
My mom was crazy as a bat, and my dad, in order to save me, accepted a job in another town. I kept the apartment (it was a rental), but at that point, I was working and could afford (barely) to pay for it.
I will be forever grateful to my late father for that.
Mentally 8, physically 17🤷♂️
14
18
I never technically did. Just my mom passed away.
I had a disabled brother that my mom stayed at home and took care of. With her little income I don't see how she'd manage without me and it was just simple life for me. I feel more adult like now that I'm on my own.
I was 26
I'm 30. Going to next month as long as I get my visa. Most people don't start by emigrating but fuck it
I attended out -of-state college but I still felt like my home was my home. I would say I moved out more officially when I started grad school at age 23.
- Went to college, and never returned home. After the first semester, I ended up moving in with my girlfriend in her apartment. Second semester I never even went back to school except for exams and I somehow passes all my classes, even the chemistry lab class where I never went to a single lab. Then I dropped out after that one year and just got a job, got married, and that is where we are today, 29 years later.
19
- Couldn't wait to be out on my own
17
20 for college. 25 officially.
I was 19, it was 2006. I had a little 2 bedroom apartment fo $550 a month. Just me and my little black cat.
Initially at 18 when I enlisted. Didn't pan out, The again when I got married at 25.
18 then Covid hit at 22 and I had nothing and some life issues I needed sorted. Had to move home at 23. Very grateful as it gave me the opportunity to restart my life and I was out a little over a year later back on my feet.
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