Does anyone else hate that it’s called “meltdown?”

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I can't speak for everyone of course, but for me I think the word is apt. They certainly feel like meltdowns.

Sounds like autistic people are powered by uranium rods.

In this Spanish article, La differencia entre meltdown, shutdown, y burnout (The difference between meltdown, shutdown, and burnout), the author uses the term « crisis » (crisis in English as well) for meltdown and « cortocircuito » (short circuit in English) for shutdown. She doesn’t exactly propose new terms; she just uses those terms to elucidate her definitions, which also helps reframe the terminology outside of English.

I’ll take it over ‘tantrum’.

Better than tantrum.

No, because when I'm having them it is a meltdown. It is not my fault that people degrade the feelings of children, who also experience them. The main issue here is that people do not have any respect for children or what they are feeling, and feel okay looking down on them. So when we share any experiences or terms, it is used as an insult. However I still understand the need many people have to avoid that association. We are infantilized enough as is

I've had a panic attack before, and personally a panic attack and a meltdown are two separate things.

Is it possible to have both at the same time and one be stronger than the other, absolutely.

But I can't do anything when I have a meltdown... The very definition of meltdown is ~ an outburst of severe emotional distress, which could also be known as a nervous breakdown.

And oftentimes having a meltdown helps me protect myself because I'm able to process things and understand that something may be good or bad for me. Additionally I want to point out that the other definition for meltdown is ~ an accident in a nuclear reactor in which the fuel overheats and melts the reactor core or shielding.

A meltdown for me only happens after everything has built up and it eventually gets to be too much and causes a severe spread of emotions and or actions (sometimes).

I don't think we should be policing what others prefer for themselves in the moment or at the time honestly.

I used to just get accused of having a “continental temper” like my mother 🤣 I’m British, and was undiagnosed till 52yo, and basically just wasn’t being stiff upper lip enough for an Englishwoman apparently. Currently accepting meltdown as it fits my memory of them well, as mine would come from frustration with red tape or similar, so it felt more of an internal struggle to me. However, I can easily see that a similar seeming reaction to something very different (e.g. noise overload) is a very different trigger and result. Thanks for something to ponder (demographics is one of my things so love stuff like that)

I propose overwhelm or overload occurrence

I feel like I'm a popsicle melting into a puddle. 

I think the terms have a ring to them, especially since they are similar. I can very much relate to shutdown, as that seems to be my more frequent response, and I can see how meltdown sounds like a temper tantrum, even though I know the reason behind it is different— not a response to not getting what I want, but to getting too much of what I don’t want.

If I were to propose alternatives, I might have to use more words, such as “active response to overstimulation” and “passive response to overstimulation,” which sound more like definitions than terms.

The Spanish article I linked to in my other comment used terms that are equivalent to crisis and short circuit, not as replacements for the terms they have taken from English (they use the English terms meltdown and shutdown in Spanish as well), but as explanatory terms more familiar to Spanish speakers. In a way, I still prefer meltdown and shutdown, and can’t say I can think of better terms that feel as fitting.

why has this topic come up like 10 times in this sub recently

I like "meltdown." It sounds nuclear, which is definitely accurate for me. And a machine going wrong isn't our fault, it means our machines were just built differently.

I call it overstimulated cuz everything is too much for me

meltdown =/= tantrum imo so its fine with me. i dont get any social implications from the concept of meltdowns, and autistics r not the only ones who can have one. we have autistic meltdowns, but an allistic person could have a regular meltdown bc their day went bad and idk that its infantilizing. and truth be told imo toddlers arent overreacting nor can they help having a proper meltdown anyways so im not mad being compared sometimes bc i dont blame or hate kids anyways

I’d rather call it an autistic break down. Because it is essentially a mental breakdown. It sounds way less infantilized.

I call them “reality objections.”

I never thought of a better word, i just know it's better than temper tantrum.

Far better than tantrum...

We changed the puzzle piece to an infinity symbol, can we start a movement to give it a fitting name?

Meltdown seems perfect to me, and I wholeheartedly disagree with your suggestion of a movement to rename it.

A nuclear meltdown happens heat generated by a nuclear reactor exceeds the heat removed by the cooling system. This happens when the nuclear chain reaction is not controlled, resulting in higher and higher temperatures until the fuel rods melt, causing chain reaction of explosions and other destructive heat/pressure forces that damage the system and things around it (potentially even releasing radioactive materials to the surrounding area, with long-term consequences).

An emotional meltdown happens when the amount of incoming aversive stimuli exceeds a person's ability to cope. This happens when multiple incoming stressors combine to overwhelm the person's ability to control their emotional state. This overload causes higher and higher emotional agitation until a person's coping skills are completely eroded, at which point they have an uncontrolled, heated emotional outburst, which results in destructive behaviours that are damaging to the person and those around them (potentially even permanently affecting those relationships, with long-term consequences).

It makes me feel like a toddler. I despise the word. When I have one, I call it anything but that if I can help it.

It's SO much better (and more fitting) than the common alternative term (tantrum) which people have only very recently been moving away from. I can see your argument if used against "tantrum", but meltdown? No.

“Meltdown” feels like it’s our fault. Like a machine going wrong. Compare it with “panic attack,” which sounds like an outside force affecting someone. Beyond their control. Much better I think.

I don't understand what you mean by meltdown "feeling" like it's our fault.

A machine "going wrong" is not the machine's fault. I don't think blame needs to be attributed, but if you were going to blame anyone, you would blame a machine's malfunctioning to the person who designed it, made it, or time/moisture eroding the material components. In which case, I suppose you could blame meltdowns on God, genetics, epigenetics, environmental factors, etc., but as I mentioned earlier, I believe that would be misattribution of blame.

Besides, a meltdown isn't an outside force affecting someone; it's a product of the internal experiences and vulnerability of an individual person.

Would "emotional overwhelm attack" or "emotional volatility attack" feel better to you? To me, that sort of term doesn't describe to others what a meltdown is at its core. Meltdowns are destructive, heated, and the result of internal cooling systems failing. You can't describe one aspect without the other.

When people get it wrong, I just explain the difference... Temper tantrums are attention seeking behaviour, they are entirely under the control of the person having one. Meltdowns are not under the control of the person having one, and are usually a response to overstimulation causing an overload.

[Undiagnosed disclaimer]

I guess I've been dealing with the descriptive connotation of "meltdown" in my own (slightly warped) way, as I always associated it with the "China Syndrome" (movie with Jack Lemmon, Jane Fonda and Michael Douglas).

As in this catastrophic event of a core meltdown (with the theory attached it might melt down all the way to china).

A unstoppable physical chain reaction.

And then I always felt that this word, "meltdown" is a "top shelf" pathos expression that doesn't quite fit me, because uh. It feels catastrophic in the moment and unstoppable chain reaction is also on spot, but I'm not glowing in the dark afterwards. It's bad but it's not that bad.

The radiation part is disputable.

So I (personally) opt rather for overload or the mental image of ye olde steam-pressure displays (with the obligatory following valve malfunction cause pressure finds a way, even if you didn't plan for it).

Depressurizing chain reaction. Nah, that's unwieldy.

Snafu.

Situation normal, all fucked up

You would rather call it a tantrum? I think not

I think it's kind of perfect since you don't want to be near me, and you might need a clean up crew.

It sounds like as if we are mini Chernobyls ready to release some serious radiation around the world (joking).

I mean, it kinda IS a machine going out of whack or as you put it, wrong. Your body is comparible to a large, complex machine. Nerves are connecting wires, joints are like gears, etc. Your brain, the computer, is having an error because the top programmer just spilled hot coffee all over it and now you're screaming and crying because you just want it to stop. Is it a comparison to a toddler? Yes. But the best way to deal with both forms of meltdown is to either not interact but monitor so nothing else happens or intervene because something is getting violent or dangerous.

I prefer the words overload or crisis, meltdown is...childish

Meltdown used to be fine for me but now it's used for any public freakout and it just feels icky to call what's essentially a medical episode a meltdown.

No I don't hate that it's called a meltdown it's an appropriate term and differentiates the behaviors. Panic attack does not cause me to bash my head on the wall.

Yes! Someone who gets it for me I’ve always hated the term meltdown as it makes me feel like a child and I get super embarrassed and it makes it worse personally I prefer breakdown because it doesn’t sound like it’s my fault more of a it’s too much for me and it makes me feel less embarrassed 

I hate "meltdown" for those exact reasons. "Tantrum" is far worse because it implies we do it on purpose when we don't get our way, and it is very infantalising, "meltdown" just feels like a lighter version of "tantrum". I use "breakdown", it sounds way less infantalising and also clear that it's not just being a brat about not getting what we want. Breakdown feels right because it does feel like I am malfunctioning and shutting down.

I am very very against anything that compares me to a child. It's not that children's emotions are not valid, but I am in my 30's and want to be treated as an adult.

Same I totally understand I also feel 5e same way it just kind of feels like it undermining how bad they can get bc society is used to using the word meltdown when talking about sad angry toddler soho didn’t get their way so I do feel like kind of a kid when using that word and I don’t like it sorry could’ve phrased that better but I’m in a rush

I like meltdown, it feels appropriate. Containment has failed and I feel like I am about to quite literally explode.

So what if it´s called "meltdown"? Some of us truly go nuclear, when they enter this state. So what if it doesn´t describe your experience?

Honestly, considering many topics here, i keep wondering, why are autistic individuals soooo insecure and at the same time seem to be oblivious to it and require the world to spin around them, instead of - you know - working on your insecurities, so all the "damaging" terms will have no effect on you?

I was there, you know? The same insecure invividual as many of you. But i don´t want the world to spin around me, so i started working on myself. As a direct result, i also grew up. Because all the name calling, labels and words - they’re childish and as adults, you can decide for yourself to not be part of it.

No, because that what it feels like. If you run with the metaphor used in cartoons of little people running a plant, it feels like the shop foreman of my brain plant is going: "Shit, something has gone wrong. Overstimulation levels are critical, there's too much pressure, the core is melting down, everyone evacuate immediately."

I mean, it would be shitty if they were called "tantrums" or something stupid and demeaning like "brat-splosions."

The stigma will just follow to whatever the new word is.

i call them freak outs. i dunno if it’s better than meltdown but it doesn’t make me feel childish

Only in the sense that I don’t have meltdowns but shutdowns. But people don’t seem to understand what I mean by that, so I just use meltdown.

Naw, not really. It’s pretty accurate.

Not for me. That’s what it feels like. I feel like I’m falling apart.

I mean

That's what it is though

There isn't a better word to describe how it feels. If anything it's used on kids not because it's infantile, but because it's so apt that it applies to all ages. It just so happens that it's kids that usually do it, though not all the time. It's not exclusive to kids, again it's a word that's so good it applies to all ages. It just so happens that kids usually have meltdowns.

Tantrum, however, is a word only ever used for kids and childish behavior.

I'm not sure about you but if I hear someone's having a meltdown, that's the same as a mental emergency. A tantrum is childish and something I can turn a blind eye at.

So... nah not me. Not only is it accurate (I literally feel like melting when I have a meltdown), but it's the most apt word we have that most people are actually going to be attentive to. If I said you're having a tantrum, then that's infantile and makes you sound like a spoiled 5 year old, and to me tantrums only apply to childish behavior, but everyone can have a meltdown at any age for reasons that aren't childish. You can actually have a meltdown for responsible, adult reasons.

Nah I've enough to worry about and it fits perfectly.

I think meltdown fits. because otherwise I have to describe it as a tantrum. Much worse if i'm being honest.

I prefer the term meltdown because to me it's what's in my head refusing to work properly for a bit.

No. Meltdowns are an autism thing for all ages. Tantrums are what small neurotypical children do. There’s a difference. Sounds to me like someone was misusing the term “meltdown” when you were younger. A meltdown is more similar to a breakdown or shutdown than a tantrum. Tantrums are what children do when they don’t get their way and then get their way when they throw a fit or cry or scream.

I don't mind, makes me feel like a nuclear reactor

I think a much more derogatory word could have been used, and as others have pointed out, it does seem appropriate.

I prefer to just say I’m overwhelmed and overstimulated.

Nah, nobody else thinks this. Especially not the reddit search function.

I just shorthand, tell people that I'm overstimulated and that I need to Go. Meltdown is not the best way to describe it, and people will often default to thinking it's some kind of temper tantrum. I just prefer to tell people I'm overstimulated and I need to rest because that gets the point across better than anything else, and what people would call a "meltdown" for me is really just shutting down and needing to be alone in a quiet place for awhile. The language does conjure to mind a toddler tantrum, and we're already infantalized as it is.

I only relate to shutdowns bc I go silent & still

Panic attacks are different. As someone who has GAD I wouldn’t want to call that a panic attack, cause it’s not the same thing.

I can agree with you though, we need a different word cause I don’t want to keep being treated like an infant. Let’s rule out tantrum and meltdown

In public and around friends/family I call it 'an overwhelming'. Around my SO though I call it a tantrum because it feels like my body is throwing one without my permission

I certainly feel like I've been melted down to my most basic parts, unable to do anything but cry and mentally spiral. I think it's descriptive. The fact that some people are assholes and use it to infantilize us shouldn't be the driving force of the language we use, in my opinion. Especially because they'll do that regardless of what terms we use.

I think it fits. The implication to me is that it's NOT something that's our fault.

But it would be fun to call it a "Resonance Cascade" but very few people would understand why I would be giggling every time I said it.

There is a different between a panic attack and a meltdown, so that isn't going to work. I as an autistic person have meltdowns, they are distinctly different than a panic attack. In part a panic attack is the flight part of fight or fight, it is anxiety based. Sometimes my meltdowns are pure rage. Especially if there is a sensory overwhelm buildup and then a misophonia trigger. That level of emotional dysregulation is hella embarrassing sometimes. Also as a therapist, I have worked with 100s of autistic people, most of us use that word pretty freely and nobody, myself included, seems to feel stigmatized by it. I work with 20 plus other autistic therapists and none of them feel especially stigmatized either.

But in your own life, if you find a word offensive you can set your boundaries and let other people know you don't like that word used, you as an autistic person find it stigmatic and offensive. As a member of the disabled population people need to respect your wishes on any language that pertains to you in regards to your disability.

Reading throught the comments for those of you looking for a different word, your looking for something that describes extreme emotional dyregulation that is expressed outwardly (like any of us have a choice, I feel like a million watts of electricity are running through my body and it has to be discharged). For some people that looks like crying uncontrollably, some of us, especially the PDA crowd seem to hit the anger pathway pretty fast. That is never pretty.

Even as a therapist, although I have serious interoception issues sometimes, I can't figure out why sometimes I shutdown instead of meltdown, I literally feel locked inside, I can't communicate, I am literally frozen. Maybe it is my level of exhaustion at the time, I don't know.

But a panic attack and a meltdown aren’t the same. Honestly, it does feel like a machine going wrong. And usually when a machine goes wrong outside factors are at fault.

Yeah it’s more like a “stress induced implosion” for me

it's not just you, i can't stand it

I feel like it’s apt to a degree, but I feel like it’s hard to get some people to take it seriously because of the name, which I hate. I had a meltdown at a work event once, and when talking to hr about it so that I could work out accommodations for the future, they initially thought I was just talking negatively about myself by calling it a “meltdown” before I explained that that’s the actual term for it.

I use to call it a collapse and reorganization cognitive pattern.

i say anxiety attack for myself

Breakdown would probably be better tbh

Was in China and Korea and had to go to the hospital in both countries because I realized I was suffering from meltdowns to the point where I was making myself sick.

I explained I am autistic while also using the translation of the words panic attack. They understood and prescribed me the dose of gabapentin I normally take and the exact supply until I departed of low strength benzodiazepines.

I use meltdown as terminology with other autistic peers, but find it harder to use around NTs or in this case culturally different scenarios.

i agree, i absolutely hate the term. it might have to do with my mother always using the word in a pejorative way when i was younger, though.

I like using the term overload event for myself

I hate the word Meltdown because I've heard people use it interchanegably with Temper Tantrum. I feel like they're equating us with spoiled children. I'd love to start hearing a more respectful word to describe it.

I don't say it this way, but in my head I call it an "overstimulation event."

Panic attack is a whole separate concept

And it's also a word with a specific meaning and actual sufferers, not to mention specific treatment (and it should not be appropriated)

It's not a catch-all for any overwhelm/crisis episode caused by any disorder

Especially when autistic meltdowns have usually little to do with FEAR, and are instead caused by sensory, executive or social overload, or disruption of routine

No, I don't care about the terminology. Also, I value not losing it in public, so I try not to.

I use meltdown for before a shutdown when I am irritable and angry and expressive. After a meltdown, my body and brain just shuts down and sometimes I even black out. I can't speak, I can't hear, I can't do anything

I say shutdown. Sounds less toddlery.

I didn't learn the difference between a meltdown and tantrum until I was an adult. I remember when I was a teenager, I felt so embarrassed at still having "tantrums" and not being able to control them. So finding out that they were actually meltdowns made me feel so much better about myself.

I’ve tried many other words: Episode, crisis, shutdown. Still havent found the right one

Yeah, when I'm having a 'meltdown' I usually don't have the capacity to name things, so in my head I just call it a panic attack. Shutdown sounds nice though, might use that instead.

I hate it too, tried to explain it to my parents and they just think it's the exact same as what toddlers get

i feel like the world “meltdown” describes how i feel during it but i can totally see how it would make one feel like a toddler and finding another word wouldn’t be a bad idea i just hope it describes it well

I work with ND young people and the term we use is “crisis”.

What annoys me most is that NTs have stolen this term for themselves in addition to the ones they already stole like non-verbal and stinming

I’ve always preferred Panic Attack.