baldflubber
5Edited
asexual

My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined. Without even knowing you I now feel an intense dislike towards you and hope you will be kept awake by the buzzing of an annoying fly.

47 M and had no idea asexuality was even a thing until I was already in my 40s. Never understood that, how and why my experiences were different from those of other people.

baldflubber
7
asexual

Your premise is wrong.

There already are people who view you as an sexual object. And there always will be. There is no way to avoid this.

Don't focus on them. Focus on yourself and your health. That's all that matters. Whatever you are or want to be, never do it for or because of other people.

You won't be healthy for other people, so don't stay unhealthy because of them.

baldflubber
20
asexual

Well as a rule of thumb you could say, if I can eat it I like it.

But there are a few exceptions. Raisins for example are a crime against everything that's good and right. Fish would be another one.

So yeah, of course I like sandwiches. But don't put tuna on them.

Of course I like cake, but for the love of whatever, leave raisins out of it.

But there is absolutely no kind of garlic bread that's unlikable, so garlic bread always wins.

baldflubber
18
asexual

No, there isn't.

It's always a possibility that someday you might experience sexual attraction. Could be tomorrow, could be next year, could be decades from now. Or just never.

But until it actually happens you can completely ignore this possibility. You are ace.

Imposter syndrome is something a lot of us feel sometimes or have felt at some point. Don't worry, it will pass.

baldflubber
7
asexual
  1. Your characterisation of asexuals is wrong.

  2. Your characterisation of aromantics is wrong.

  3. Your characterisation of aroaces is wrong.

  4. All those things have absolutely nothing to do with religious practices of any kind.

Sir, this is a Wendy's.

The nicest validation so farJoy! 😊

A while ago I met a cute lesbian couple. We met at one of my volunteer jobs and I recruited them for another one. They are less than half my age and we sometimes joke about me being an old creep picking up young women.

They are remarkable young women and were the first queer people in real life I'm explicitly out to. I don't make a secret of it but I also don't carry my label in front of me.

Recently they introduced me to a friend of theirs, another young queer woman. They did it by saying "That's myname. He is one of us." and it just felt amazing.

Those simple words were one of the most validating experiences in my whole life.

I wish all of you a happy pride month and a lot of experiences that feel as least as good as this one felt to me.

The nicest validation so farStory

A while ago I met a cute lesbian couple. We met at one of my volunteer jobs and I recruited them for another one. They are less than half my age and we sometimes joke about me being an old creep picking up young women.

They are remarkable young women and were the first queer people in real life I'm explicitly out to. I don't make a secret of it but I also don't carry my label in front of me.

Recently they introduced me to a friend of theirs, another young queer woman. They did it by saying "That's myname. He is one of us." and it just felt amazing.

Those simple words were one of the most validating experiences in my whole life.

I wish all of you a happy pride month and a lot of experiences that feel as least as good as this one felt to me.

baldflubber
142
asexual

Some do, some don't.

This answer applies to every question beginning with "Do asexuals...?".

baldflubber
1
asexual

There is nothing to break up. Based on your description you aren't together. You aren't a couple. You are friends.

baldflubber
17
asexual

Medication doesn't change your sexuality.

baldflubber
4
:Claw2: Ravenclaw

What would you like to see changed in the new upcoming series?

Nothing.

You are welcome. Let me know if I can do anything else for you.

baldflubber
38
asexual

Am right in asserting that I’m allo despite not enjoying causal sex?

Yes.

baldflubber
68
asexual

You are on a dating app to date people. That's it. No more explanation needed.

baldflubber
7Edited
asexual
10dLink

Psst.

Hey, you.

Yes you.

Wanna know a secret?

whisper Nobody can ever be completely sure.

There is only a "Sure enough." That depends on if and how you experience sexual attraction. If you don't experience it or only rarely and/or under specific circumstances, that would mean you are asexual.

And that wouldn't be as scary as you might think. It can actually even be freeing and relieving to come to this conclusion. Knowing who you are and understanding yourself better is always a good thing. Even though it doesn't seem this way right now.