I am trying to lose weight again but I feel like I need food to regulate my emotions and energy. I want starved as a child. I think food was the only thing I could control. And now the thought of eating less food (and less food that give me dopamine) makes me incredibly anxious.
Trying again
32F - 5'3" - 330lb
Hi. First time here and looking for some guidance.
I've been fat all my life and I just seem to keep gaining weight. I have tried to lose it many times. I've been to fat camp and weight loss retreats with little change. I'm sure genetics is playing into this in part.
My challenges: emotional eating, ankle pain/low mobility, depression/anxiety
Benefits: I have 3 months off work to focus on myself for once.
My question is, with these challenges what should you recommend I do? Where do I start this time? Because it feels like nothing works.
P.S. I will be seeing a doc for the ankle. It's an ongoing issue that has been evaluated to need surgery but they won't do it at my current weight.
So I've started fellowship and it's precipitating some particularly terrible panic attacks and depressive episodes. People on the outside say I'm here to learn but I'm already being put into situations where I'm expected to perform, not learn.
I know I've made a huge mistake going into medicine with cptsd. Confidence never comes, just more anxiety. Does anyone else feel like this?
This sounds like my situation exactly. And it's still happening. It really messes with your head.
I think something about the stresses of becoming an adult really uncovers the insecurities developed from trauma. Especially in the workforce. It became more evident that I didn't have the self esteem to deal with criticism. Other people were able to deal with those things without it overwhelming them.
I had to call them on someone else's phone and let them know. It took them about 48hrs to restore service.
They did say that they are removing 2 and 3g right now or something so if your phone uses only those, you may not get service back.
Thanks. This got it sorted. They were messing around with the towers and didn't reconnect my device 😂
I knit and crochet. It helps because I know if I make a mistake I can rip back and start over. It's been hard to find a safe space in this. I used to have other interests but my emotional abuser kind of ruined them for me. I also challenged myself to put my work on IG and build a community of people who like the same things I do. It makes me feel a little less lonely.
I do have an android and have reset the network settings. Also rechecked APN in case something was changed 🤷♀️
No service
Is there anyone else experiencing service issues? I have service when wifi is on (house wifi) but when I turn it off, I am not connected to the network at all. This just suddenly started happening.
I understand the loneliness and the feeling like all your plans are just going to hell. I'm going through a similar thing right now. But even if you can't see away through this you have overcome it before. You got out of that house before and you can do it again.
When I am panicked and freezing, I try to think of myself 30 mins or an hour (or however long) in the future when the bad thing is over. Because the bad things don't last forever. I hope this helps 🫂
I think one of the things she really did to mess me up was comparing my achievements to my siblings. They resented me for doing well. So I get nervous when I do well. And when I might fail 😬
Is there anything other than EMDR that might help?
Was/is it bad enough?Request: Emotional Support
This is my first time using this so I hope I'm following the rules.
I remember hearing a lot of arguments. They would throw things. I was only ever hit as discipline. But I was often forced into the role of mediator. This continued with my siblings as I got older.
My dad was strict and I loved but feared him. He died when I was 12. After that I was responsible for the majority of house chores and care for my younger siblings. I was shown that my needs came last. Despite this, I was able to remain a high achiever and thought I was relatively well adjusted. All of my physical needs were met.
My mom is manipulative and controlling. She continues to be so and none of my siblings want to spend time with her. But she has latched onto me.
Until I went to medical school. Something about the strict environment where mistakes weren't acceptable really triggered me. I'm constantly afraid of making mistakes or upsetting anyone. Even my therapist.
I'm struggling with depression, panic attacks and poor focus. I'm afraid I won't be able to do my job and I've been in therapy for years. I've been diagnosed with cptsd and done EMDR a few times without improvement.
So I guess I want to know, is it bad enough? Or am I just spoiled and sensitive and that's why I can't get better? Because that's how it feels.
what's the title of this book?
Hi, I've been looking for the title of this book all day and it's driving me crazy.
they are investigating something and get an invitation to a debauched house party. The heroine winds up getting temporarily kidnapped and drugged with an aphrodisiac. The hero has to "take care of her" until it wears off so he can take her home.
Anybody?
Yes I know this. I'll try it again. Thank you for the support 😊
Trying again
loseit