I went to the OBGYN today and I don't ever want to go back. I told her all my problems and she just stared at me. Wasn't mean or anything but didn't offer any empathy or anything. Like their only job is to do impersonal tests but I don't feel safe going there for that. I'm progressing with dilators but I don't know when I'd ever be comfortable with an exam; they might just make things worse.
Plus I'm fat and autistic and my boobs haven't developed right. I can't have sex because of vaginismus and even if I could no guy would ever want me. I feel so worthless and dehumanized. I'm not a woman, I never have been, and I don't want to be nor will I ever be one because I can't relate to women. I'm so sick of everything and don't want to deal with it anymore.
I really don't understand all the fanboys who still cling to this ride. It used to deserve the acclaim but now it's just painful. No, I didn't ride in a middle seat, but that shouldn't matter - it's a problem if 2/3 of the seats give bad rides and potential injuries.
El Toro is overrated
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