events on metrobus are also accepted
edit: sex-related response counter: 15
what's the weirdest thing you've ever seen on metro?
[Discussion]I don't wanna finish my ravioli anymore 🤢
I have a feeling this wasn’t a good thread to start while eating, OP!
I saw him more than once. He always licked the door windows.
A lot of good head oil builds up on those windows
I was on the bus once, looking out the window. My lips were dry so I stuck my tongue out to lick them, just as the bus hit a bump and my face hit the window tongue-first flat against the glass. All I could think about was all of the greasy heads I had seen leaning against bus windows.
Gotta take your calories where you can find them
What a terrible day to be literate
That sounds like a guy who needs a few sick days.
I don't know. It may actually be opposite. The guy might have an immune system off the charts.
A disheveled borderline homeless man entered with a massive garbage bag, which was squirming. He took it and put it on a seat, taking up an entire row.
Anytime somebody enters and looks at it, including me, he says” that’s my bag, it has crabs in it. I’m going to sell them and get rich.”
Well he got up to transfer stations and predictably the bag burst.
There were dozens of live crabs crawling around the Gallery Place station with the guy futilely trying to pick them up. Absolute pandemonium and a couple of people seem to be stealing the guys crabs.
This takes the cake for me.
The crab cake?
I actually feel kinda bad for him, I wonder if that was supposed to be his big break
It seems that it was his big break!
Oh my god. When was this? I swear a friend of mine told me a similar story years ago. Were they on the same train as you or is he a repeat offender?
This sounds like if James Franco tried to remake Old Man and the Sea.
This is amazing
A couple years ago (pre pandemic), there was a notorious red line homeless man. He was morbidly (MORBIDLY) obese. This guy smelled like nothing else I've ever smelled - something akin to feces, locker room, and fermented dirt. He would sit on the floor of a metro car and clear out trains.
I remember the day I first encountered him - it was rush hour 5:30PM at Farragut north. I was in a client facing job and ready to take my standard 50 minute metro back to Maryland. The front train was completely empty - what luck! Usually, there's standing room only around this time. I walk into the car, barely making it, and the doors close behind me. The aforementioned smell greats me and the 2 other unfortunate souls with me. We endure the tortuous ride to DuPont. A poor lady was gagging the entire way. Everyone who got on immediately leaves and goes to the crowded 2nd car. I saw him about 3-4 times a year after that, haven't seen him since. Hope he got the help he needed.
The guy you're thinking of was nicknamed "Big Stinky." His real name was Anthony. He died about a year or so ago.
I'm sorry to hear. How do you know about him?
I'm a metro employee. There were people within the company who tried to help him, but he had a number of serious issues. When he died, the news made its way through the grapevine.
Damn. Do you know how he died?
I remember this guy if it’s who I think it is. He might have died right behind my apartment, but it was more than a year ago it was 2020 so maybe it’s not him? It was a morbidly obese guy who I saw on the red line all the time though. One day he was in the alley behind my old place in DuPont and I saw him eating pizza then the next day I came out onto my balcony and EMTs were there and he was slumped over. maybe he didn’t actually die then, he looked really dead though.
He smelled soooo bad. I encountered him several times. Your nose couldn’t miss him. Poor fella.
Honestly hats off to the EMTs who had to experience this… and hold off judgment
Did this guy often have a large bandage around one of his feet? I think I remember him.
In my group house we called him MORG (Morbidly Obese Redline Guy). He also used to sit on the sidewalk in front of the Cleveland Park station by Siam House and the fire station, I saw the firefighters try to engage him sometimes. I always hoped that he would get help and I'm sad to hear confirmation that he died.
Omg I know exactly who this is!! I haven’t seen him in a while too, but had the EXACT same experience. He wasn’t wearing shoes and I think the smell was coming from his feet.
I remember him too and he is dead.
The smell is gangrene, likely resulting from diabetic neuropathy secondary to an infected ulcer. It's one of those things that you smell it once and it lives in ur brain forever.
Source: Social worker, used to work in an ER
Ugh. Imagine how awful his life/inner thoughts must've been to get to that point and stay there.
Gangrene odor sounds kinda like the smell of parvo positive dogs working in vet med. I was a receptionist for a couple of months YEARS ago, and that smell still haunts me. A close second was freshly expressed anal glands.
Oh wow I remember that guy from before the pandemic. Truly a mindbendingly weird and strong stench
He wasn't only in the red line, but I think it was his preferred line. But I know who you.mean.
Same, once he cleared out the car I was on. Someone goes "anyone got hand sanitizer?" A woman gave some out and goes "I'm providing a public service."
Same but the guy pulled his pants down and spread his crusty shitty asscheeks.
Is it too much to ask to BAN problem people from the metro? FFS
same, he spread the crusty shitty ass cheeks and then he asked me if he could eat the brown paper bagged stool sample that I was taking to my doctor and shortly after I also saw his crusty dong
Oh wow I remember seeing this exact same guy at glenmont one late night after I got off work. He was sitting at the top of the escalator that leads to the parking garage. It was like late fall and kinda cold and I felt bad but I have learned my lesson with the homeless and just do not interact with them at all
MR SHITTY POCKETS
man got on the train at Farragut West - started yelling to get everyone’s attention - then dropped his pants - squatted - and took a dump - then got off at Foggy Bottom
impressive speed and form
If someone knocks on my stall door when I'm using a public restroom, it usually resets the process. This man had some awful taste but great execution.
Omg. No way!
Once a bunch of juggalos in full makeup got on my car carrying weed whackers. It was 7am.
Whoop whoop
Was it the Juggalo March on Washington? I think it was late spring 2019? Or 18?
Rush hour train at L’enfant Plaza. Rest of the train was filled—except for the first car, which was empty of people.
It wasn’t for any of the horrible reasons I imagined, though—the only passengers in the empty car were two crows, flying up and down the aisle, perching on the seat backs.
Wow! I wonder what the crows thought. Like, did they fly home? This is fascinating.
It’s like when you notice a fly in an airplane. Poor fucker is gonna be in a world of shock when those doors open
Its the same story the crows told me, its the only one they know........
guy boarded the X2 on H Street on a Saturday night with a damn near life-sized Bride of Chucky doll. he tapped his card, then tapped her card, and took her to go sit in a pair of empty seats about midway back.
As long as they paid 😂
honestly I was impressed, you know those X2 drivers have seen EVERYTHING and here was a dude paying his fare and making sure his girlfriend paid hers too 😂
Unexpectedly wholesome lol
A guy with an Indiana Jones whip. He was leaving a National Geographic party a few years back.
1) I love this, but 2) if that's the weirdest thing you've seen you haven't been here long enough XD
All the other weird stuff I’ve seen on the metro has been pretty standard for any major city’s public transit. A man dressed like Indiana jones cracking a whip on a train platform is not something I’ve seen anywhere else
Living near the convention center was GREAT for this kind of thing. Hobby convention attendees go HARD for detail and craftsmanship.
I appreciate a good cup of coffee.
This woman started masturbating to upset a couple of nice old church ladies.
A woman masturbating on the metro(bus)??? Wow, a new take on an old classic
That sounds like a total power move TBH
Okay, wait…fingers in, or flicking the bean? I want to understand the full picture…
A bunch of twelve year old kids come running down the aisle with an open hardcore porn magazine, pushing it towards people’s faces, simply cackling with glee. This was also the first time I took my parents on the “wonderfully clean public transportation” in my brand new city.
I bet your parents haven't been back since
Oh they’ve been back. A little hardcore porn never kept Ma and Pa ksteich from convenient and economical conveyance. This was the time of the Sniper though, so I’m sure they had second thoughts about my chosen city.
I was there. They were 11, not 12.
Let’s settle at the cusp of middle school and call them lil shits.
A large iguana being carried on a nonchalant guy’s neck (on a bus, not a train, though).
I read “lasagna” not “iguana” and literally couldn’t figure out how one would wear a lasagna.
Is wearing an iguana that much more reasonable…? 😅
only just
I dunno, they can be sorta cute when they’re healthy and not sneezing/spitting all over? I love lizards though. So…🤷♀️
My reflection :/
C'mere buddy
papadapalopolous you are LOVED!!!!❤️
Hey, our neighbor in the 1970’s was a Mr. Papadapalopolous! Nice Greek man whose wife was French. She taught me to speak a bit of French, and they had an amazing garden.
Thanks for bringing back a bunch of good memories! You are a treasure!
Some dude obviously wanking it.
We were the only two people on the train car and for some reason I just started shouting at him. He got up and left at the next stop, still wanking it as he walked off.
As always with this question..
An exorcism before 7am on the bus around 2011. I understand we all have work,but maybe take a sick day for your fucking undeviling Linda.
I need more details
I do too. I just know a priest was working his hardest with a Bible on that woman and she was loud!
Saw a man ride up the escalator in a wheelchair. He just…held on
Another time I saw a woman on the train smoking a blunt through her mask. It was kind of iconic ngl
I’ve seen the wheelchair thing before too. I was terrified for the guy and couldn’t unclench until he got to the top.
Yeah a man died from falling at the Columbia Heights metro doing this
This reminds me of when I first took the Red Line during the pandemic, and on one of the long escalators, a couple was heavily making out through masks. Baffling
A woman holding the most relaxed - completely unrestrained - duck, getting on the Red at Metro Center.
Couple very obviously having sex on the green line while trying to be discreet about it. In a full ass car during rush hour. Yeah.
ETA: for those curious, she was sitting on his lap. They had a jacket laid across them for 99% of the time, except for those unfortunate few seconds where it fell off and I had the misfortunate of picking that moment to glance in their direction. People generally had a clue and kept their distance except for a few people sitting near them or around them. Whether they had any idea what was going on, whether they wanted to make a point, or whether they were also getting off I have no idea, nor would I really wanted to have found out. Some people had headphones on and I think were blissfully unaware but I have no earthly idea why like 7, well-to-do white-collar types decided to set up shop in their general vicinity. Completely bizarre and something out of a fever dream.
Word to the wise; there's probably a good reason that rush hour Metro car in the middle of the train is empty and rest of the cars are packed to the rafters. Proceed at your own risk.
Omg how is this even possible???
Drug or teenage hormone induced horny
With style and panache, apparently.
Did anyone say anything
At least they tried to be discreet. I've definitely seen people get off (literally) on making everyone uncomfortable intentionally.
How on earth were they discreet? Was she on his lap under a coat or something? Was some poor stranger next to them?? The horror
We need a lot more details!!
Couple years ago, about 7am on a Tuesday, train pulls up and everyone bails out of the car and moves to different cars. I poke my head in and there are 2 girls, mid twenties, in full prom dress and running makeup, throwing up all over everything, crying and telling eachother how much they loved eachother.
Weirdly wholesome tbh
mid twenties
prom dress
I wish there was some background information here
My money is on law students.
Did anyone see the guy on the red line today with the drawn on mustache, umbrella dancing about and shrieking “heyy!” every two minutes trying to get some reaction out of people? Just something so odd and creepy about him.
A penis a foot from my head from a guy stroking it in the aisle next to my face.
No effing way!
Yellow line train, somewhere between gallery place and shaw. Totally packed train car during rush hour, a woman in the back of the car starts screaming at the top of her lungs, and even did this weird turn in a circle while stomping her feet. She howled for a couple more seconds after that and then stood there minding her own business like absolutely nothing happened. The whole train car was staring at her, a couple young girls halfway up were asking what happened, and the woman didn’t respond or react to a single person. It was weird because it was the type of screaming someone does when they’re in trouble or something is wrong, not to just get attention. Combined with ignoring everyone I tend to think it was some kind of psychotic episode.
Omg
Three nine-ish year old girls loudly blasting music from a cell phone, announcing to the entire train car that they would be “entertaining us this evening”, and proceeding to twerk to the music until they got to their stop about 15 minutes later.
Was Chris Hansen there hiding behind a newspaper?
The day of one of those family values sort of marches. A family, parents and two elementary aged kids with signs, gets on the Green Line at L’Enfant headed toward Branch Ave. They were huddled together, arms around each other like they were in immediate mortal danger. The other passengers were people going home from work. Mostly people with lanyards and ID’s around their necks, a few construction or trades guys, a couple of law enforcement looking types probably headed to the INS building by the Branch Metro station. Not even any rowdy middle school kids. Just quiet workers at the end of the day. That family was clearly terrified and probably tells stories of their bravery.
A woman completely took her shirt off and just was walking around yelling about something with both her girls swinging around for everyone
I think that’s illegal? Nobody called the police? I mean State of Maryland made a big deal about women wanting to bathe topless at the beach but someone walking topless at the metro???
A guy rolled a new gas grill onto the red line at RI Ave during rush hour in the summer (so it wasn't maximally packed). Clearly purchased it at Home Depot, rolled it to the station, and right onto the train. Nobody said a single thing.
Why would they? Dude's just tryna get home with his new grill. Makes perfect sense. What else is he gonna do, spend $60+ on an Uber XL big enough to take the grill home and hope the driver isn't a jerk about it? Nah. Roll that shit home.
I witnessed a couple of GW students moving their couch via metro...during rush hour on the orange line about 10 years ago.
I moved some big rugs and tables on the metro as a GW student!
I’ve brought some crazy purchases onto the metro, too. Such is life when you don’t have a car or money for an Uber. Gotta get that shit home somehow!
Did that with a painting I bought at the State Dept book fair a few years ago. Awkward and I felt bad taking up so much space in the car, but Saturday afternoon was probably the best time to do it.
I saw this, too!
This woman was going up to people one after the other and getting close to their faces, making direct eye contact/staring for a prolonged period of time. Didn't say a word. Her facial expression was blank.
It was so strange, I wonder if it was some kind of social experiment. It definitely made ppl uncomfortable
A guy casually twirling a tampon between his fingers while staring out the window. (Considering some of the stories above, I feel obligated to specify that it was, thankfully, unused.)
There was a guy hanging from the ceiling like spiderman doing pull ups with his whole body
I’ve seen that guy before
My first experience with real big city public transportation was the DC Metro at the height of the Jheri Curl craze.
The windows, the backs of the seats, the hand rails at head height were often very slippery, but smelled very nice lol. I had know idea why for quite a while.
This is why I use reddit. Thank you.😂😂😂
College, waiting for a train on a weekend night. Group of girls returning from clubs gets in that space under the escalator. The sound heard after is best described as a waterfall.
On the way to RFK, a girl just straight up bent down, didn’t take off her panties, and straight up pissed on the floor of the metro train in a crowded metro.
Cried for a minute when everyone yelled Ew then started laughing.
So they peed. Don’t be coy, say it!
I’m painting a picture!
That took a minute lmao
Bunch of teenagers ganging up on an older woman when she called them rude and to clean up the garbage they were dropping on the ground and no adults said a thing or helped defend the woman, that was weird I guess.
It’s rush hour at McPherson square station and there’s some commotion towards the bottom of the packed, descending escalator. At the bottom, some angry and disheveled looking guy is flipping two birds to every person getting off the escalator, and also saying “fuck you” to each individually.
I really admire how he turned the escalator into his own “fuck you” conveyor belt. One of the funniest things I’ve seen on the metro system
I’ve seen a passenger and his albino snake. I wasn’t sure what kind of snake it was. This passenger had it in a clear plastic container with holes small enough for the snake to breathe through.
A dude jacking off right next to me, I was 15 at the time
I feel like that would legally count as sexual assault of a minor??
tbh it should be, but god lord i didnt even know what to do. ffs i was just trying to go to the zoo for my shift lol
That's fucked up. I'm so sorry!
A woman who seemed relatively normal asked me how to get to Howard u hospital and then proceeded to explain how she’s a targeted individual and Elon musk planted a chip in her brain and then she showed me this big bleeding wound on her head that she had been scratching and then pulled out a wad of personal business cards of politicians and their staffers and explained how she has been harassing a bunch of politicians about all of this
Someone clipping their toenails.
I came here to post the same. Seems pretty tame compared to most of the stories here.
A (I’m assuming) homeless man just casually sleeping with his foot behind his head, using it as a pillow against the window
This dude was wearing a full hazmat suit with a bucket of liquid with a lid that wasn't completely sealed so it was sloshing all over the metro cab.
This MFer would randomly lift up their face shield, spit into their hand, and throw it blindly behind himself onto the metro cab window but he didn't seem to care where it landed.
I wasn't in splatter range so all I do was look in horror and disbelief.
lol I was attacked at the waterfront station 3 years ago by a woman. I was on the phone with my mom talking about life and she ran over screaming and calling me a stupid white bitch. A young guy intervened and held her off because she was trying to hit me and I walked away for a few minutes while he got her under control. When I came back I thanked him and he told me he was 15, both this other woman and I were full adults so I felt so guilty.
I think I know which woman you’re talking about. If it’s the same one, I see her wandering around the Waterfront metro and M Street pretty frequently, always screaming about how much she hates white people. Sometimes she’s wearing mismatched shoes or clothing. Very depressing, and she’s clearly suffering from something. I’m sorry that happened to you, that must have been absolutely terrifying to just be attacked out of nowhere like that
Human feces on the seats
Not the weirdest thing ever, but a man clipping his nails.
I don’t know if this is super out of the ordinary but kids hotboxing the “employees only” closet on the red line.
Iconic
At Rosslyn, waiting for Silver Line toward Ashburn.
A black guy yelling at a black metro worker, calling him racist(?) and clearly upset about something, while the worker threatened to call authorities
Angry guy got on the train and pulled a rotisserie chicken out of somewhere and started going to town on it with plastic silverware while yelling things such "they got me fucked up!" and "fucking bullshit!"
He got off two stops later and idk what happened after that
Getting out cutlery and an entire rotisserie chicken for a two stop ride is quite a move
Foursome on the platform under the escalator at Chinatown. Butts and dicks fully visible.
Noice😎
This thread is most entertaining.
I don't have any really good ones. People listening to loud music, smoking j's, puking. Normal city stuff.
Not exactly weird, girl just casually rolling a J on the Silver line.
…is it weird I see this like once a week?
96 & 70 bus I have experienced truly eye opening moments since getting here five years ago. Top two 1.) Guy pissed himself in the handicapped seat to the point it was dripping off onto le floor, he gets off (trailing it obvi) and someone with a suitcase gets on and immediately sits in the piss soaked seat while everyone was trynna tell them otherwise. 2.) This man projectile vomited in the back of the 96 multiple times.
A dude jacking off while his face was bleeding. Looked like someone had used his face to scrub the concrete.
Gallery place, lower platform. Two high school age girls engaged in a full on street fight. Goes on for at least 8-10 minutes.
Platform lights start flashing, train approaches. Both girls immediately stop, calmly check to make sure it’s not the train they’re waiting for. Go back to beating the shit out of each other.
Literally last Friday some girl got on a rush hour train at ballston in this extremely coordinated fuzzy white Princess Peach themed outfit and just lit a marlboro and smoked the whole thing. Powerful aura
$100 it was a person going to winter fire 😭😭😭
A Group of demanded everybody's attention. Everybidy thought they were going to get robbed. They took out a boom box, blasted music, and took over the aisles with a song and dance routine. It was impossible to get by them to leave the car so everybody was scared and trapped.
Some grubby looking guy sleeping across the aisle from me with an unlit cigarette in his mouth woke up, pulled out a book of matches, lit the cigarette, and started to nod off again. He never extinguished the match, which ignited the rest of the matches in the book, which started to catch his jacket on fire. I nudged him to wake him up and said “I think you’re on fire.” He startled awake, put the fire out, and got off at the next stop.
A metro car with no one yelling, smelling gross, or playing music out loud. It was like a unicorn
Get on yellow line going north and a pair of big round black eyes are staring back at me. The eyes belong to a massive wild (falcon? Owl? Idk) that is tightly wrapped up and calmly perched on its owner’s arm. When I say big I mean it was big. The train was packed yet no one seemed fazed. The best part was when I called metro transit police (surely this is illegal, dangerous for humans, and animal abuse?) they told it was fine as long as the wildlife is on a leash (so if someone brings their pet tiger onto the metro that’s cool as long as it’s on a leash?).
Hello? Police? I'd like to report a falconer
They’re probably a city employee hired to deal with rats
On the X2:
- On NYE day (around 3pm), a couple who were plastered drunk and openly chugging cans of beer both had GIANT duffle bags full of cans of beer. Every person who got on the bus, they shouted HAPPY NEW YEAR!! and handed them a beer. Then argued extensively about where to get drunk pizza.
- One Friday night, on one of the double-buses that have the accordion seating in the middle, a guy set up a small table in the round accordion section to play Three Card Monte. The bus was packed and EVERYONE was into it. People were making side-bets; children were around the side waving dollar-bills to get in on the action. It was a raucous good time!
- There was one group of teenagers who loved to harass people they didn't think belonged (namely, white people they thought were tourists). They'd try to do anything to make an excuse to fight people, so I ignored everything they did. That included one time when I was on the bus and one of them came and sat on my lap and talked to her friend like nothing was happening. So I stared out the window like nothing was happening until she got bored (or uncomfortable) and left.
- Same group of teenagers, once I was getting off the bus, and I saw them gathered around the back exit. Every white person who got off looked shocked and uncomfortable. I was in the back section, so there was no way for me to get off the front or not go past them. And, yup, by the time I'd gotten off, one of them had fully grabbed my vagina.
On the Red Line:
- Woman on the using a nail file to saw away at her back teeth, muttering about how she can do her own damn dental surgery, thankyouverymuch.
- Group of teenagers being as loud and obnoxious/offensive as humanly possible to get a rise out of everyone. My policy is to ignore them and look out the window. One of them came over to me and petted me on the head--fully running his hands over my hair. (Note: I'm a white, red-haired woman. They were black. I'm guessing they were trying to show how obnoxious it is when other people touch their hair. Which, fair--except I would NEVER even think of doing that to them because it's racist and disrespectful AF.)
I turned to him and calmly said, "Please do not touch my hair." Then he did it again! Luckily, his friend (a girl) realized that he'd gone too far and told him to stop/pulled him away. (Double-luckily for him that I realized that they were kids and making a political/racial point. And that I'm a deeply patient person. I was on my way to my axe-throwing league championship finals and had my throwing hatchet in my backpack.)
This started out somewhat wholesome and then got progressively worse/more bizarre. Holy shit, public transit is wild
I wanted to make sure that I had a mix of the good weird and the bad weird! The X2 is always good for a story either way. I've met and seen tons of great people on both the bus and the metro. I've seen an old couple on the red line who were obviously very lost and confused and one lady who was clearly on her way to work and going to be late got off with them to make sure they got to their destination safely. Actually, we should make a thread about the most wholesome things we've seen on the metro! I think that public transit gets a bad rap--and, y'know, bad stuff does happen. It's a big city. But it doesn't negate the good.
That’s very true! I’ve seen some unexpectedly wholesome things on the metro! One that comes to mind happened when I was on the green line heading towards Greenbelt. This person (maybe homeless and trying to ask around for money, maybe lost—I’m not sure) was going around and attempting to get people’s attention. They were deaf and having trouble communicating. Then, they go up to one woman, and without skipping a beat, she just breaks out into perfect ASL. The look of relief and excitement on the deaf person’s face was crazy. I have no idea what they were talking about, but they both were really excitedly signing back and forth to each other until I got off five or six stops later. It was kind of sweet
juggle fretful numerous rain ask bright fade paint tidy squash
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
This guy with poop on his exposed butt crack got on the bus and sat down. Definite biohazard and one of the most disgusting things I’ve witnessed irl.
a blowjob...
Dude beaten it on the way home from school back in 2004. Just hammering away without a care.
Lady drinking a bunch of little creamer cups and tossing the empty ones in the air around her while screaming and cursing (slurs included) at anyone who made eye contact with her.
Train at Pentagon City, dude was whackin’ it next to a trash can, with his back turned so no one could see but it was pretty obvious he was choking his chicken. He finished up into the trash and got on blue line.
It was like, 7am too.
Some dude came up to me, started talking and peeled back bandages and random strips of cloth on his arm to show a large and infected open wound and then asked for money. I was grossed out and got away quickly
I was on the red line and a woman was screaming at the top of her lungs religious stuff alternating between English and Spanish. I got a glance and she was just sitting down at a seat and looked ‘normal’ (had clean clothes and no signs of distress). She kept this going from the time it took to get from the Noma station to gallery place, barely any pauses. I thought it was an impressive vocal feat.
The train arrives at gallery place and the screaming stops. She gets off the train, which was also my stop. We were heading the same direction for a little bit and she’s walking like nothing happened.
I have seen my share of drunk people, homeless and mentally ill people. Some puke but no nudity or bathroom antics.
It’s crazy to me how so many people have stories in such a short time. I rode metro daily for 20+ years and basically have nothing too crazy.
My favorite was riding the S2 down 16th street. This guy that looked and sounded just like Mike Tyson (not quite as muscular) got on and sat at the front. He started talking incessantly to this lady who was clearly not interested. At some point he tried to get a co-sign on something he said from a guy reading the paper and the guy told him he was reading and wasn’t interested. That aggravated “Mike” who then went on a rant about how “It’s public transportation and the public can say whatever it wants.” The newspaper guy just kept telling him he wasn’t interested and to have a good day. As “Mike” who had been annoying but overall pretty civil got off he says to the guy “Suck my nut!” What a time.
Guy got out of the train after DCA heading south at 60mph. He straddled 2 train cars with his feet and lit a cigarette. I was horrified.
Woman on the red line, sitting on the floor, barefooted, eating smelly pickles from a trader joes bag. She seemed happy
i was riding home during the holiday season in 2022 and saw a guy sitting in the seats reserved for people with disabilities, doing bumps of cocaine, and drinking a vodka mule in a can.
another time pre-covid pandemic, a random drunk woman stared at me for multiple stops before quickly and non-consensually kissing me on the cheek as she exited the train.
"honorable" mention: i was riding the bus to takoma after school, when this woman refused to pay the bus fare and proceeded to cuss the bus driver out. the driver pulled over and refused to move until other passengers begged him to keep it moving so the group wasn't penalized for one person's poor actions. the woman kept cussing at the driver. when the bus pulled into takoma the woman started throwing punches at the driver's head. the driver had enough. he pulled over in the roundabout at takoma, grabbed the woman, and threw her to the ground. thankfully the passengers begged the bus driver not to beat the woman and to let us off the bus.
i think that woman who peed into a cup on the X2 and threw it on the bus driver takes the cake, because that little bit of metro history was caught on camera.
A street preacher holding a huge animal horn (like a Shofar but like twice as long, she had it propped on her shoulder like a rifle) yelling about how Jesus's real name is Yoshua and we should all be calling him that.
A former Cabinet secretary.
I got all you beat and i haven’t read this thread
I got on a crowded ass red line train one day at Farragut North amidst rush hour. Nowhere hardly to stand so I push my way in to the car and end up at the end, close to that little conductor seat with the window. Sometimes one may just glance there to make sure someone is there, right? There is a lady leaning over into the aisle talking to a dude in a wheelchair. Crowd shifts in closer to them now she is not talking to him she is masturbating him rather vigorously almost violently. Homeless sex is one thing but in my shock and dismay i remember the song i was listening to was done and then i could hear her encouragement. I was aghast. You ever had a surreal moment where you look around like “someone else seeing this shit” me and this old lady standing under the map lock eyes. It occurred to me before the crowd shifted she had stood where i was- she knew…. Mad weird right? But then a week later Greenbelt bound train heading to UMD same couple, same beat off routine, i wish i was making this up…. Also, when I was 19 i swear i met three vampires (ladies) that got off at DuPont and even flashed fang at me. It wasn’t hot like in True Blood, either
Not anyone on the train but I was on the red line coming back from Shady Grove and the train straightup just skipped Twinbrook. Just sped through it.People got off at the next stop looking so confused
That happened to me. Train skipped Woodley Park (not due to police activity). There was another train 2 min behind it and my theory is the conductor was adding more distance between them.
This guy had a trolley filled with CVS and Walgreens products. A lot of it were those plusOne vibrators
Probably a common occurrence but not something I’ve personally seen before riding on the metro, but some guy just dancing and singing/yelling out stuff I couldn’t make out. This was on the orange line heading out from DC to Maryland.
Mentally il woman crouching in the middle of the train then taking the meanest piss ever
Guy was sitting in a seat by himself, looked passed out.
He pissed and shit himself at a stop and everyone ran out to the other cars.
4 guys dressed as Baby New Year on the outdoor platform at King Street Station. Diapers, top hats, shoes, and a New Year sash each. I hope they were drunk, because it was cold & breezy!
A smoke train. During or after an event at one of the stadiums, while waiting for the emphasis green line, the train arrives and a section of the train closer to the back was an exclusive smoke train. The guys who where on it yelled out, “if you ain’t smoking no weed, you better not get on this train”
Jacker
Someone picking their scabs and eating them
A paying customer
Man masterbating
A lady once took a picture of my wife and I on the metro
I didn't witness this one but... my sister flew into town for my bachelorette party, which she was organizing. She'd leaned heavily into the penis decor theme (per my request, because I thought it was hilarious.) On the metro from the airport to my house, she proceeded to blow up a human- sized inflatable penis. Not a penis-sized penis; a 5 ft tall penis. She then carried this giant inflatable penis from the metro to my house, and when I came to answer the door there was a giant penis standing there with a suitcase like it had just flown in for a visit.
I wish I'd seen the reactions from the other passengers.
Guy licking the train door windows. Just standing there licking away.