Grief, loss, despair

I won't go into the meguilah that has been my life, but tonight I'm just finding it really hard to cope with so much trauma, grief, loss, despair and soul crushing pain. I have been to therapy, counselling, frum and non frum. How to keep going with such unbearable pain? I'm at loss and feel like I'm falling into a black hole, a void that will never end.