I won't go into the meguilah that has been my life, but tonight I'm just finding it really hard to cope with so much trauma, grief, loss, despair and soul crushing pain. I have been to therapy, counselling, frum and non frum. How to keep going with such unbearable pain? I'm at loss and feel like I'm falling into a black hole, a void that will never end.
I'm really sorry you're struggling :(
As someone who's been dealing with much of the same including treatment resistant depression my entire adult life - please, whatever you do, know that there are people who can help and sympathise.
Above all else, please don't do anything irreversible.
I’m sorry to hear this. If you need to speak to someone, I’m here, if that helps.
Lean on us! Like someone else mentioned, if you’re in immediate danger call for immediate help!
Most or all of us here have been through difficult times ranging from plain bad to atrociously horrific. We all carry a truckload of pain, grief, trauma baggage every etc. some respond better to help than others.
I’ve been pretty close to where you sound like you are a bunch of times. In fact, this week was one of those weeks for me too. Why? I think it got triggered in the beginning of the week when I found an old toy that used to belong to my son who passed away. It all went downhill from there. I’ve been to therapy in the past , it was definitely helpful and might even go back. Having said that, our lives can be tough. We went through major traumas growing up then more major traumas leaving it all behind! If it were easy, many more people would do it.
How to keep going with such unbearable pain? One step at a time! I don’t think anyone here has any immediate solutions but most of us can empathize with you and would be happy to chat if you think that might help. For me, my one step at a time is exercise, work, my other kids (when I have parenting time with them) but to be honest on the really bad days even that doesn’t always fend off the jeepers. I went to a dance party tonight (last night) to try to get out of shitty zone. It worked a bit and I feel a bit better than I did earlier. That doesn’t mean it’ll work for you though but might be worth a try.
As someone who has gone through a lot of horrible things as well I’m happy to talk if you think that might be helpful. Wishing you the best.
I wish I had the right words. I wish I could convey how I feel now compared to how I felt before. The easiest thing that was by far the hardest was to accept where I was in life and then stop, take a few minutes for myself, and just breathe.
Our minds are tricky things. Sometimes that focus on what was is hard to shake. If your looking for advice, then just breathe. However you want to. In whatever form or setting. With or without guidance. Just take it one breath at a time until you can find that space in between it all.
We all feel for you. We are all alike. I hope you can find comfort when I say, you are going to be alright.
If you want to talk let me know. I wish you health, safety and well being. Be kind to yourself.
I often feel the same way. ❤️
I’ve been where you are and it got better. Please hang in there, and feel free to update us.
First, I’m so sorry you are struggling with this. You do not deserve it. Next I would tell you that you can overcome it, I know that because, and this is not to diminish the horrors you are going through, others have gone through it and come out the other side. Sometimes your body may need help from the outside so go to a psychiatrist get a diagnosis and fight this one step at a time, through medication or therapy or both. You will win. You will be happy. You deserve to be happy. The sun shines even when it’s cloudy.
PS DMs are always open.
Intaveneous Ketamine at a good facility or Spravato.
So sorry you're having a hard time :( it's really hard to wrap your head around horrible and painful experiences and know how to move forward. Some random suggestions: write all about your grief, connect with others who can listen and support you, turn inward and care for yourself (eat, try to sleep, shower, walk, take steps to make your life better), let yourself be angry and sad for a while, read memoirs of people with similar losses to see how they coped and remember you're not the only one in this type of pain. Make a bucket list and focus on how you can make the second half of your life better than the first. Look into dialectical behavioral therapy and acceptance commitment therapy for coping skills and helpful ideas. Good luck, hang in there!
I'm sorry to hear. If you're having difficulty coping right now, please reach out to a hotline for support
In the US, 988 lifeline https://988lifeline.org for crisis or Rainn rainn.org for sexual assault.
You can always post here and people can try to help