Women from SA, why do you tolerate such men ?

General Discussion

Currently at episode 4, I'm flabbergasted by the lack of quality in men. I've been watching many shows and while I'm the first to condemn NA materialistic aspects of relations and their approach to traditional gender roles I must say this is next level.

I've never seen such low quality men and I have no idea how it's possible to find any of them attractive.

Taking Genesis and Nolla for instance, they are basically liars, cheaters, and pussy thirsty men who show at no point a single care for people around them, especially their "exes".

But the worst in my opinion is Isaac, who's nothing more than a big baby who would ask her wife to change his diapers if he were still wearing them. Guy is basically doing nothing and still complaining about his trial wife partner.

I really have no idea. How do you girls manage to deal with such shit ?

in TheUltimatumSAby Cuuldurach

87%

18d

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Solid-Dragonfruit438

18d

I’m curious as to where you live? Last I checked women were sick and tired of men everywhere. Women all over the internet are choosing a proverbial bear over a nondescript man. Heck, men with wives, sisters and daughters are in agreement too.

That being said, the bar is incredibly low here in SA. Both men and women are working tirelessly to keep it in hell. People hide their desire to hurt and abuse behind African culture and male privilege. Race, internalised oppression, gender roles and inequality, cultural norms and misogyny intersect so painfully in the lives of so many South African women. We are one of the gender based violence and rape capitals of the world and femicide is often blamed on efforts to liberate women. We live in one of the most violent countries in the world with homicide rates rise daily. The men in SA make your average internet incel look like a feminist nice guy.

I say this to say, most women in SA are just trying to live their lives and survive. Some of us have chosen celibacy/abstinence. Some of us have chosen to turn a blind eye. Some have chosen sex work and transactional relationships. Some prefer to work with the patriarchy instead of choosing to go against it. Some of us are activists, cycle breakers and leaders. Some women live in complete denial and that’s how they cope. Some women are breadwinners and head of households. We are all just trying to live.

Despite how things may seem on camera we are pretty conservative society but we don’t hide much of anything. Marriage, children and family values are desires women are conditioned to have and revere as early as our time in the womb. We are taught to compensate and overcompensate for the shortcomings and incompetence of men in our families and society. We are sold to the cult of religion, culture and tradition as soon as possible. As you can imagine all roads lead to the comfort and pleasure of men. Women put up with these things because they desire love, companionship, partnership, family, weddings and marriage. Unfortunately, what you’ve seen on camera is a reality many face. It is par for the course for heterosexual women.

lilasceo

16d

amazing text. thanks for sharing!