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Lucky bastard
Clearly hasn't eaten at taco bell.
Judging by your username... you must have had some gnarly* toilet battles.
Edit: *
Haven't we all! Prevent battles by diplomacy...er....fiber!
User deleted comment
10mo
Lol I just said it for the joke. Papa johns used to get me for some reason but no longer. Fiber intake in the US is DEFINITELY something to improve. These folks pooping for over 2 minutes is nuts to me.
What are they even doing for 2 minutes? Straining?
Redditing
This is very real at the moment
not at all fake
I was literally taking a shit and browsing Reddit haters gonna hate
The entirety of reddit:
sweats profusely
Yeah boi. I’m especially bad and sometimes spend upwards of an hour in the bathroom when I shit, but I also only shit once every three or four days.
That’s what im saying! I’ve never had any diarrhea or anything when ive eaten tacobell. I only eat it occasionally as well so it’s not like my body used to it either.
My least favorite thing about the Taco Bell causes diarrhea running joke is that people will say some variance of immediately having diarrhea, which of course is not how the digestive system works, unless of course you get food poisoning.
Right? When I was in college I worked next door to a taco bell and ate there about 4 days a week and my stomach was always fine.
do u order regular stuff or do you get the extra spicy superhot stuff? because one is very much unlike the other in terms of digestion
I get the hottest stuff I can find and have no issues. Something is wrong with y'all.
I know! Even the Diablo sauce isn't all that hot.
Diablo is really weak lol. This isn't me trying to show off my tongue, it's just that they don't have anything that's especially spicy
I thought this until I accidentally drenched my homemade “white people tacos” as my wife calls them in garlic reaper sauce (it’s the best I’ve ever had, but I usually only put 4-5 drops on each taco). I was in tears eating those tacos, and very nearly in tears again the next day trying to expel them.
The fact that the pepper has a name like Reaper should be warning enough. And yeah, the "ring of fire" the next day is a real thing.
That said, I do love my spicy foods too, and have a couple of Carolina Reaper products of my own. Gonna have to find this garlic reaper sauce you're talking about, it sounds delicious.
The most vicious hot thing I've tried is the 2020 Paqui one chip challenge. Tasted like literal dirt, and about a minute in I had to stand up and start pacing. I had to just concentrate on breathing and talking myself down off that mental ledge for a good few minutes, willing myself through the worst of it and suppressing that panic reflex. When it was all said and done, I actually went the full hour with nothing to eat or drink, but I did get one nasty chili cramp about 30 minutes after that, and took an antacid/anti-gas chewable which fixed that issue, thank God. I was smart enough to have a glass of milk before doing the challenge so I wouldn't have gastric meltdown. My sister didn't, and she didn't fare as well, LOL, had a good bout of chili cramps from it.
I still have the 9 million scoville gummy bear and Toe of Satan lollipop, but since we did the one chip challenge, we have both been reconsidering life choices, LOL.
It's Taco Bell. They don't sell anything that's hot, let alone super hot
Nothing at Taco Bell is spicy
It's a real thing. My ass turns into a lava waterfall whenever i eat there bro 😭
damm eat a fucking vegetable
I eat pretty healthy bro, its only after eating tacobell
I eat tacobell too but I never get that
Idk mb I'm allergic or sum shit
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10mo
I'm on Reddit, we folks are people of habit and low hanging fruit
Chasing the serotonin dragon.
People of lowest common denominator is probably a more relevant statement.
For real. Just downvote if you don't like it and STFU. No need to be a bitch about it.
Was kind of fun is that the download button was not meant to be an agree or disagree, but it was meant to be a " does this contribute to the conversation " metric. That's quite difficult to get folks to do lol
if you have a lower GI bleed, you can crap blood, and technically, a component of blood is called plasma
lmao a technicality, but not the same
"you are technically correct... THE BEST KIND OF CORRECT"
The second someone says “technically”, Futurama will be brought up.
Very expected Futurama.
Well not that shocked
Downvoted for quoting the show... lol
Not technically correct, but depends on separate definitions of a word.
It’s real to me damnit!
no fun
You win this round. But it's still not created Bose-Enstein condensate.
Yet.
Bose–Einstein condensate or Satyendra Nath Bose and Albert Einstein condensate is the liquid that those two have exhaled in their lifetime. While not a lot in millilitres it is a lot of molecules. And in the time since they lived that liquid has diluted into the water cycle. So probably a couple of molecules of Bose-Einstein condensate has been passed rectally
Mine has I had to go to the doctor about it.
I've had some spicy food that made me feel I was shitting plasma. Does that count?
Taco bell has given me plasma and non-neutonian fluids
Gets stuck when you try to grunt it out. But falls out like lumpy oatmeal when you relax?
This is such a perfect description
My soft serve will frequently clog that shit
Visit enough run down gas stations and you're likely to find evidence of non-Euclidian shits too.
Plassma
and it sure as hell ain't producing bose einstein condensate
Eat some White Castle hamburgers with extra onion and get back to me. You’ll be cutting 3/4 inch steel plate in no time.
Thata majority of fast food for me these days. A few exceptions like In-n-out that don't mess up my gut
God I want white castle now. If ever there was a guilty pleasure
Back in the day I could kill an entire crave case after a night of drinking. Glory days.
This ⬆️
Ass Plasma is easy: combine taco bell/kebab/other arse destroying liquid shit food and anything approaching 1 million Scoville units as sauce on top.
Trust me, you will feel plasma.
I had a stomach bug for 5 days last year. Day 2-5 were plasma only.
Taco Bell, #6 combo meal. You’re welcome.
the only good bug is a dead bug
You just need a lighter.
To be fair, producing plasma from your ass might induce memory loss.
If it does, I’m calling off work
Or the Bosein-Einsten Condensate right?
Lol came here to say this.
Or Bose-Einstein condensate.
Eat enough Chipotle with ghost pepper and those farts will electrify!
Not matter how hot the snakes are, plasma has never left my anus
So you're not interested in Pyroflatulence then?
well now I might be
Color me intrigued
The old “blue flame”
There's a good band name.
And No Matter How Hot The Snakes Are, Plasma Has Never Left My Anus sounds like a pretty killer album title.
Go to a Thai restaurant and order some Pad Thai extra extra spicy and get back to me.
I eat that shit for breakfast
Those Bose-Einstein condensates get real scary real fast.
Time crystals aren't very comfortable either.
I had a case of the time crystals last night after eating Taco Bell
Don’t forget the strange matter. Gotta take your shirt off for that one.
Wait until you hear about the spooky action of quantum entangled particles...from your ass...
Dumb me thinks to myself, "Ice?"
That's the comment that made me laugh the most today💀
Maybe see a doctor if you've never had a solid
See a doctor if you're shitting ice
yet to see bose einstein condensate tbh
i wanna know the technicalities behind that one lol
Came to find the plasma discussion... Reddit never dissapoints.
Can't say I've ever shat out a time crystal
Sometimes when you're on the can it feels like an eternity
You will a couple years ago
I'm calling my ghost poops that from now on.
Your ass can also absorb all states of matter, queef, ejaculation and dick.
I want to be there when you talk to the doctor about why you shoved a lit match up your backside.
your ass absorbs queefs?
I thought the same thing at first, but I think he means the air that gets trapped in your rectum from anal penetration.
Yeah, but getting it to produce a Bose-Einstein condensate is rather unpleasant.
Plasma? Liquid crystal? Bose-einstein condensate? Idk what kind of magical ass you have but mine doesn't make those three.
First time my ass produced a superfluid I was wondering why they called it a restroom, I was fighting for my life in there.
your ass doesn't produce it, it expels it.
My ass produces non-newtonian fluid
So, whose fluid is it?
Yes
It can transfer 3 states of matter, at least my ass doesn’t get cold enough to condense farts into liquid I’m not sure about anyone else’s
Sometimes all at once!
I had CDiff last year, this person is right about this shit.
Very satisfying to shit out a bose-einstein condensate
Don’t I know it. Hell of a week. 😮💨
I can feel some non-Newtonian fluid creeping right now
For real. I once made a Bose-Einstein condensate by eating Culver's before ice fishing
The basic ones if your ass regularly makes plasma see a scientist and a doctor
it can also produce gas, but turns out to be liquid
There’s like thirty something states of matter so I doubt it.
Not plasma!
Oh, wait, yeah, I've done plasma a couple times.
Sometimes all 3 at the same time.
I'd be very worried if plasma started blasting out of my ass
And at the same time
Dark matter only once.
Scrolling and it seems a lot of y’all haven’t entered the plasma phase yet. Best of luck.
As someone who just had a bad shit just now, this is very much true.
No it can't or else I'd be selling my ass plasma.
No so sure about plasma.
You’ve never eaten chipotle?
My ass produces plasma too. Not the best experience
I mean, if I squeeze hard enough, I could put out some degenerate matter
Only if you're having a bad time
The frail human body, so inefficient, and while miraculously hearty; hardly by intelligent design. Who was this asshole?
I’m no scientist but I think everything is produced before it reaches the ass.
Someone's been watching the skeleton videos...
If your ass is producing plasma, see a doctor.
If your ass is producing Bose-Einstein condensate, see a physicist.
I'm pretty certain my ass cannot produce Bose-Einstein Condensate
Yes loved when I had diarrhea and puking and while puking I was shitting fucking yellow water
I need to know how to make ass plasma. I was not aware of that possibility.
Damn! what are you eating that you have plasma coming out your ass?
Missing Bose Einstein condensates and plasma
Brb gonna crap some color-glass condensate
Your arse just shits it out.
When you're healthy, it's also amazing enough to be able to contain all of them too.
Even plasma? WTF are you eating?
Is it theoretically possible for plasma to come out??
I missed that episode of Mr. Wizard.
It's not your ass, it's your body. My mouth can do the same thing. Delete this. Also, plasma.
If Bose-Einstein condensate comes out of your ass, go to the hospital immediately.
POV: me learning that my ass is capable of producing plasma
My ass creates degenerate matter?
Plasma has entered the chat.
My goodness this is one of the best showerthoughts i’ve seen in years. upvote this badboy into the hall of fame
*the three cl-ASS-ical states of matter.
When you're literally reading reddit in the bathroom because you're pissing out your asshole....
Bro, if your ass is producing plasma, I don't think you even see a doctor at that point. You see a physicist.
Anti matter shits would really be.... Explosive.
This is an oddly worrisome shower thought.
Almost. Plasma anyone?
Do bloody stools count as dark matter?
Plasma ass would be a rad nickname.
Einstein Bose Condensate out of my ass is crazy
Liquid, solid, and gas. Yep you are correct.
Yeah, I don't think my ass can produce plasma, much less more exotic states like supercritical fluids, degenerate matter, or Bose-Einstein condensates.
The Higgs-Einstein condensate would like a word.
This is true. I took Meth and ate Taco bell and produced a Bose-Einstein Condensate.
And all tastes of matter
I was having plasmareaha the other night, nearly killed all the neighbors.
My ass has yet to produce any plasma. No matter how hard I try.
Solid: shit Liquid: diarrhea Gas: fart Plasma: blood from anal tears I guess.
you know I think if my ass produced a Bose-Einstein condensate I'd be pretty rich at least as far as scientists go
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To the best of my memory, My ass has yet to produce plasma.