Roast me please

You look like you'd slowly and patiently form an intimate friendship just to ruin it by asking for nudes.

This is my first time seeing Ronald McDonald without his makeup.

You look like you are about to go on a school shootout after getting rejected from the ugliest chick possible.

You look like you asked the kids if they were ready then the cops showed up and arrested you.

Mighty brave of you to take this photo in the same room as the kid you just violated

We sure this isn’t a child ? There’s a fucking picture of the SpongeBob pirate on his bedroom wall.

Who lives in a bedroom under the roof? A geeky fuckin ginger

Tyrion Autister

You’re the less successful brother, Fred Sheeran.

Please, Life dealt you the "Ginger" hand. You've been roasted enough.

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You look like you "Cum and Chum" out of SpongeBob's ASS and thoroughly enjoyed it.

$10 this dude will FLIP OUT on you if you say a false fact about trains.

I'm sorry that she went with Jordan Catalano bro.

You look like you bring games that take up a lot of space to music festivals.

You look like you have a lot of opinions about the fundamental concept of not wearing shoes.

You look like you wear short sleeve shirts over long sleeve shirts.

You look like you play in a jam band that has a regular fan who desperately over dances at every gig you do.

You look like your name is Jeremy.

You look like you taught music at a coed non-denominational sleepaway summer camp because you could be a role model for younger kids and just smoked pot and fingered a 16 year old.

You look like you decant Yellowtail to impress girls.

Who lives in his mums house with socks full of cum?

Ginger virgin!

Invited to no parties nor orgies is he

Ginger Virgin!

If him not talking nonsense be something you wish

He'd kneel down on lego to suck like a fish.

Albino screech

“oooooooo who lives with his mother and gets no pussssy…..THIS.MAN.RIGHT.HERE”

The fact that you actually took the time to incorporate two different colors on the roastme paper and write it so it doesn't look backwards ?

Is the reason why you're single man. That kind of dainty, sensitive, and affectionate attention to detail just means you probably have a tighter pussy then I did when I was teenager.

You have severely failed your manhood. But congrats on your girlhood

You look like a kid a used to sell oregano to multiple times

The 3D effect on your note doesn't work.

Get a haircut and get a real job so you can buy a proper sound system.

He’ll be the next one kicked out of art class, just you want and see.

Bro beats it to Patchy 5 times a day.

I just know you have a manifest on your computer. You look like the employee of the month at a SpongeBob themed gloryhole. slide the pirate pic and the dick pokes thru very clever.

Spongehead Shitpants…

Seth Rogen and Justin Timberlake's illegal son!

How did you feel when you got kicked out of Metallica?

Until I saw facial hair, I was not sure it was a man.

Love the self portrait in the background

Jacking off using rudiment charts to keep your rhythm is sad.

Get a life.

You used to be so good at building LEGOs.

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All those testosterone injections are paying off Nice scruff

Ngl you look like a deranged Pewdiepie

Ramen hair

Your eyes make it look like you're always in pain

You’re the human version of ramen noodles until payday.

I can tell by your face that you’re insulting your mom if she didn’t bought your item when she’s back from the grocery store.

And I didn't think a jewfro could look any gayer.

The only certificate your wall is missing is “30 years a Virgin”.

🎶Who’ll live with their parents till they’re 33!

You’re broke dumb ass!

Playing with legos and hair colored pee!

You’re broke dumb ass!🎶

(I spent too much time on this lol)

♫ Who looks like a pineapple and hangs with Scooby? ♫
♫ (Douchebag Bong Hands) ♫
♫ With pubic hair chin and as poor as can be ♫
♫ (Douchebag Bong Hands) ♫
♫ If not getting laid be your kind of drug ♫
♫ (Douchebag Bong Hands) ♫
♫ Then go into RoastMe and present your mug ♫
♫ (Douchebag Bong Hands) ♫

Dude you’ve got enough on your plate already… you don’t need a Reddit sub to roast you ask any girl

Aww.. you keep a picture of your dad on your wall? That’s sweet. You both have the same chin..

Loved you in Fast Times. I see you kept your uniform.

your smile matches the pirates smile in the back.

you look like me neighbour, Jerry. Hes a wanker

You would have a patchy the pirate picture on your wall

If pegging were a person....

Can't do this. You're a fellow drummer judging by the rudiment sheet in the corner.

He's a drummer, folks. Go easy on him. He already gets enough shit from everyone else in band telling him he's not a real musician.

Ed Sheeran from wish

You got the drum rudiments poster up in the back, but the only Lefts and Rights you're getting are Left on read, and passed Right by.

You look like you're about to audition for the remake of Curly Sue.

You look like you had your first beer through the umbilical cord

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You look like an forever kid but with an calvitia and an kid size di-

As soon as your “dates” see your LEGO certificate of achievement their pull-ups must hit the floor.

Why’d you include a portrait of yourself in your selfie?

I don't talk to gingers..... with your stupid little gay freckles and your Godawful and hideous ugly as shit faces ....fuck you, you souless piece of shit!!

Your face is half feminine

“The boy grew up while his father was out at sea”

Are you Patrick or SpongeBob?

Imagine needing a specky chart to play a single stroke roll...

Is that your mom in the photo? I see the resemblance.

I can tell from your face that your paradiddles suck.

You wear those headphones in public so you aren’t over stimulated

Not right now, come back later!

I bet you’re listening to whale sounds

I will hold a peace of grass to your face and you will shriek in fear

HOOOOO ! WHO LIVES IN THE SUBURBS UNDER HIS PARENTS TRAILER !?

• SQUARE PANTS SHITHEADS

Come on guys ! Continue the song !

Sorry, I can`t think of an insult dumb enough for you to understand>>>>>>

Nah, if we roasted you, everyone within 2 city blocks would get a contact high.

I bet you’ve self diagnosed as autistic, which makes you feel quirky. Also gay!

Carrot bottom.

You're one of those people who move Hawaii and start acting like they're native Hawaiian. "Aloha" does not a Hawaiian make.

you look like you do college and then spend the rest of your time on the pc just playing video games.

Are ye’ ready kids?!

AYE AYE CAPTAIN

Ohhhhhh… who lives with his parents and sits when he pees?

ginger hair’d fuck-wad

You look like Hitler's last wet dream

Porch Pirate

A thin fat Axl Rose.

Is that the last photo of your Dad at Pirate World before he said “ahoy matey” and left you on the pier at Legoland?

You look like you have a restraining order from your step sister

"Ohhhhhhh... who lives in his mom's house under the stairs

This... fucking... guy... here"*

*Sung to the tone of "Spongebob Squarrepants.

You look like you're in a homeschool special-Ed class

Soy un perdedor

I think you really fucked up picking a fight with CM Punk.

I try not to anthropomorphise adjectives but for some reason crusty comes to mind when I look at your pic.

What a fagget! You can tell that you will never talk to a girl bc you are a pussy

We all know you ate the crayons you wrote that with. Your lifetime achievement award from Lego is impressive. It's amazing that you managed to survive the choking hazard. I bet you sucked the brass off all the doorknobs in your house and lick the windows on the short bus. Your dick probably looks like a thimble wearing a clown wig. It's hard to tell, though, because looking for it is like trying to find a small button in a fur coat. The only job you have ever or will ever qualify for is part-time at Spirit Halloween (stocking the shelves, no one believes you can do money math. The decimal throws you off every time). You claim to be a musician, but randomly hitting little rainbow xylophone at adult daycare is as far as you will ever go with it. Your favorite part of getting new light up velcro shoes is eating the silica packet out of the box.

Lends new meaning to the phrase “dick pic”.

I like the picture of your father next to you

Could you please tell me who lives in a pineapple under the sea

Got your green noise on to sooth that tisum? Yeah, stay locked up with your Lego’s and SpongeBob, leave life to us functionals.

The transition is not going well

Your parents let you transition before puberty but you decided to stop and now you’re are stuck in between male and female.

If you’ll never be anything in life had a face this would be it

“Oooooooh, who lives in a crackhouse right under the streeet”

Ginger

A Vagina made out of Legos is the only one he's seen.

"I'm too busy to date" Whatever you gotta tell yourself Nancy

You look like your mom did LSD and smoked weed when she was pregnant with you.

Wow ma’am! What hormones are you taking to get that under chin hair growth?

You look like the offspring of a clown that fucked a piece of gum under a desk.

Only after we roast a bowl Bruh

The pirate?

It’s useless, you have no soul.

When McDonald’s got rid of their clown, he went back home to live with his mum and jerk off in his room.

didnt know dream was here

That room smells like 2 month old unwashed Sox and empty cheetohs bags

🎵who lives with their parents and they’re 30

How's your mom's basement?

Is that picture in the back you on a good hair day?

Did ickle Ron Weasley finally get addicted to porn like we always anticipated?

You're not worth roasting.

You look like every post you make on Reddit gets no comments

The framed picture of your dad you’ve been saving since he left is a nice touch.

Cute. You have your dad's portrait in the crusty bathroom where it all started. Too bad it didn't end with a swallow.

You look like the pirate in the photo if he lost all his dignity and became a “professional” gamer with a solid following of two people. One of them being his mom.

Who amongst us doesn't need a molesting drum teacher in our community? I bet you paradiddle all the local kids.

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d

Bros father is behind in the frame

Move out your mum and dad's please. Its time you let them fuck without the worry of you running in their room after having a nightmare.

Career in engineering? You couldn’t engineer a fucking Thomas the Tank train set. You are however eerily adept at socially engineering young teenage furries with your many fake accounts and conducting side hustles as a cum sponge for fur daddies.

Your look like your related to the sponge bob pirate behind you.

your built like horrid henry's deformed cousin

Legos and basic drum patterns. Your parents must be so proud.

Jack Sparrow paint-by-number? Self-portrait!

is this a desperate attempt to feel the touch of another woman?

Looks like Bill Burr and Miss Piggy fucked.

Carrot Bottom

You look like a “oooo who’s my good wittle kitten” talking kinda guy

You look like your friends with Dan Schneider

Literally trying to be the captain from SpongeBob but failing miserably

LRLLRLRRLRLLRLRR

This man legally changed his middle name to “friendzone”…

You look like an old version of a jockey that got dumped after high school

Your favorite band is kidz Bop and your favorite show is VeggieTales

You look just like the pirate that sings the sponge bob song

You look like a perm had a gay son it was ashamed of.

No me sentiría bien meterme con un pelirrojo, y más si se parece al pirata de bob esponja