AITAH for not helping my morbidly obese aunt get to my wedding?

Shitpost

My (F35) and my fiancé (M34) are getting married this weekend at the best venue in New York City, at the top of the Empire State Building. Of course it’s going to be a Disney themed wedding where all of the groomsmen are one of the 7 dwarves and the bridesmaids are each a version of Sleeping Beauty [er, I totally meant Snow White and didn’t get the Disney stories confused in my totally non-fake story]. Let me just say, everyone just LOVES the idea and we’re all really excited for the wedding.

The problem is my favorite aunt who happens to be morbidly obese. She’s also extremely claustrophobic and is 3/5 on the social dysmorphia scale, so she can’t ride in elevators, especially the ones with mirrors on the doors. She normally just doesn‘t really walk more than a few steps and gets around in a special reinforced hoveround when she absolutely needs to go out. And, the poor thing, can’t even fit into the front seat of our Escalade, so she needs to ride in a specially equipped van to accommodate her.

When we invited her to the wedding, we were thinking it was just a courtesy invite and that she wouldn’t really want to go because of her physical and mental handicaps. But, she RSVP’d and wants to attend! And because she can’t take the elevator to the observation platform at the top she wants the groom and I to carry her up the stairs!

I don’t think we can carry her up 86 flights of stairs! And I told her that. And she told me I was fat-shaming her and should just be a good niece and do what she asked.

I even offered to have a special construction crane rigged up to lift her up on the outside of the building like they did for King Kong in that one movie. And it would be on the opposite side of the building to 34th street so it wouldn’t attract any undue attention. She rejected that idea right out and was adamant we should carry her.

Reddit, I don’t know what to do, she’s my favorite aunt and done so much for me! AITAH?

UPDATE

Please don’t make fun of my aunt! For those that asked, she’s 5’3” 145.

And I can’t carry her! I’m pregnant with twins!

SOURCE

Source

in AmITheAngelby Criticalwater2

89%

mrsmunsonbarnes

NTA go no contact immediately

Criticalwater2

Oh, all the red flags are there and I would, but her wedding gift is her hundred room mansion in the Catskills and a several million dollar inheritance. As the rainbow golden child in our family, there are just certain expectations I need to meet.

Glittering-Peak-5635

Omg!! Pmsl! 🤣🤣😃 I actually answered the real post about the obese cousin!

Criticalwater2

The thing is, there are people with disabilities and health issues that do need accommodation. And people do have really good ideas to help people out without making it a big deal or shaming them-and mostly people who need accommodation don’t want to make it an issue, they just want access like everyone else. The posts in AITA/H are just so over the top and obviously fake while ignoring the obvious and easy solutions.

Glittering-Peak-5635

I totally agree, i was suggesting live streaming the wedding so that the cousin could at least watch the wedding even if the wedding venue was inaccessible. Obviously picking an accessible wedding venue for all your invited guests is a much better choice to make and would then accommodate everybody you want to attend and be a part of your special day.

Gold_Statistician500

bad bitch at the dinner table

Have you thought about getting a flatbed truck to haul her in?

Criticalwater2

That was our first thought, but she thought it would be a distraction on my big day.

bobbyneko

I wanna say NTA for thinking about the elevators feelings in this situation. No elevator wants to carry 145lb of aunt.

That being said, YTA for creating this situation in the first place by inviting the aunt, even though you didn’t think she’d accept. What if she gives in and tries to overcome her mental challenges and take the elevator??

Like, the elevator is the only one in this conversation who didn’t truly consent to this situation. Have some compassion yo and stop thinking the whole world is about you and your family drama.

Alternative-Talk-795

YTA by making the bridesmaids dress up as snow white. The ideal wedding would be groomsmen dressed as dwarves, you as snow-white and groom as the prince. Obviously your evil MIL will be the evil queen.

Criticalwater2

Thank you for not calling too much attention to my obvious Disney princess confusion. I’ve corrected it in my story.

HealthNo4265

Have you thought about chartering a construction helicopter and having it lower her onto the observation platform?

Criticalwater2

This is a great suggestion, unfortunately there were no construction helicopters that were equiped to lift people so we contacted the coast guard about a rescue helicopter, but then we were worried the blade downdraft would mess up the wedding decorations.

egotistical_egg

Have you considered hiring an elephant to carry her? You may still need a crane to get them both to the top of the empire state building, but she would have an emotional support elephant to help her through the ride, so I think it should be manageable!

Plus I think having another "elephant" in the room would help your aunt feel less alone in her obesity. (I weigh 105 lbs)

Postingatthismoment

I like the construction crane part—especially when her statistics are added at the end: 5’3” and 145. Lol

archipeepees

Have you taken high-school physics? If so, make a stack of trampolines and drop her from the crane onto the trampolines at an angle so that when she is at the peak of her trajectory she will be positioned at her seat in the wedding venue. You can use your physics know-how to determine the "right angle" (lol!) and correct number of trampolines.

gahidus

Didn't realize what subreddit I was on, moment of haywait a minute. Funny though

Bluberrypotato

EDIT: [extremely vital information]

You could try one more thing. Tell her you'll carry her up the stairs and then knock her out with some chloroform and shove her in the elevator. Just by herself, though she's already pushing the elevator's weight limit. Make sure they only feed her salad during the reception. Either way, NTA, it's your day, and she's not your responsibility. You've been much too patient. I would've cut her off already.

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Pomerosa

Blindfold her and tell her you have a surprise for her. Give her headphones with music, then put her in the elevator.

Zak_Rahman

Let the military know in case they need to scramble helicopters to battle your fat aunt after she goes berserk from eating too much cake.

I think I saw a documentary about something like this. But it was quite old and women didn't shave at the time.

lonelyronin1

If she thinks you are fat shaming her by politely telling her no, tell her in uncertain terms why - it's time for the real truth. She's going to be offended either way, you might as well go all in

NTA

TextImmediate8931

I’m sorry but I can’t physically carry you up 86 flights of stairs. simple as that

protogens

At my age I'm not sure I could physically carry MYSELF up 86 flights of stairs.

TextImmediate8931

Hahahahahaha right?! Let alone another person!

HappyGardener52

-7

She's 5'3" and 145 pounds? That's morbidly obese? I was thinking 300 pounds. Hire a couple of muscle dudes to carry her up. 145 pounds is not that much.

Criticalwater2

I didn’t mention it in the post but she also has chronic anxiety disorder from past abuse and will only allow me to touch her.

Clean_Factor9673

Get a gurney or howdah. No touching.

dilla_zilla

Throwing wine on babies!

r/lostredditors

Next_Possibility_01

-6

tell her to take xanax and get in the elevator if she wants to go....I am sorry she has issues, but it is your wedding and not your problem - where are the other relatives?

dilla_zilla

Throwing wine on babies!

r/lostredditors

noahsawyer95

-7

Morbidly Obese at 5’3 and 145lb. That math don’t math

Her BMI is 25.7 yes that is overweight but morbid obesity is a BMI of 40+, she is not even obese which is 30 to 39.9

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