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AITAH for asking my husband (35M) to move his car for our guests with kids?
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5d
OK, I didn't say it was reasonable.
But I also don't think those things are necessarily the same. Sharing your house with others is just one of those things that if everyone's not on board, there's complications.
How does your husband feel about them staying? Or did you sling the same rationalization at him?
I responded with “well you’re the man of the house
People need to be a little careful with demanding gender roles like this, because they may not like being forced to comply with their own.
YTA. Just because your husband is the man of the house does not give you the right to demand that he move his car when you could move yours and that's it. And be careful about using gender roles as a weapon, because I'm sure you would be furious if he told you that as a woman your duty is to go make him a sandwich and do his laundry.
“well you’re the man of the house and not helping out in other ways with that comment”
Okay but... You are aware the emasculating comments are dripping in misoginy, right? If you think your house needs a man to command it and he's not fitting that, who is? What role have you assigned him?
Also, did you unilaterally decided on having guests? Because it seems that way (I guess you are the man of the house?) and to expect him to be happy to help after that seems irrational.
I guess there's a chance that he is indeed behaving like a kid/teenager instead of a husband. But in that case you have more problems than this particular instance and introducing misoginy to the mix doesn't seem like a good idea.
You are aware the emasculating comments are dripping in misoginy, right?
Misandry.
Misogyny is prejudice/hatred towards women. When it's against men it's misandry.
I meant misoginy. Because a lot of criticisms that men receive are on the spectrum of them not being manly and in that line, of being feminine.
The weird comment of strict gender roles speak of someone who believes in a patriarchal society and that's why I mentioned misogyny. Because in my perspective it wasn't about emasculating this dude for being a man, but for not being man "enough" when in fact anyone could be the "head" of the household.
Oh wow, blocked for this?
Also,
So you're saying when a man in insulted for failing his manly duties,
A man has no inherent "manly duties" just because he's a man. A man can be the breadwinner, the SAHP or even to live a life of leisure.
A man might be failing as a partner if they are a burden on their partner, but that's going to look different for every household.
I meant misoginy. Because a lot of criticisms that men receive are on the spectrum of them not being manly and in that line, of being feminine.
So you're saying when a man in insulted for failing his manly duties, it's really an insult to women.
Jesus Christ....
Oh wow, blocked for this?
Yes, I limit my interactions with toxic man-hating feminazis wherever possible. There's degrees of prejudice I won't put up with.
I think that's a strange thing for him to say, if my spouse invited anyone and especially family members to the house then they are my guests too. He wants you to walk further and have a stressful time unloading groceries? Or he doesn't care about the guests... Very much NTA
He wants you to walk further and have a stressful time unloading groceries?
No, he wants her to move her own car onto the street, rather than demanding that he move his. She just thinks she should get her way because men are supposed to privilege women.
Is he going to help her unload things from the car then? Further is... just further, and more effort. Even if the genders are reversed.
Further is... just further, and more effort
No one said it's further. You're lying about the details just to try to have a point.
Is he going to help her unload things from the car then?
What does that have to do with who gives up their car spot for the guests?
Even if the genders are reversed.
Ok let's reverse the genders.
Husband: "Go move your car so my sister can have your parking spot"
Wife: "Why don't you move your car?"
Husband: "Because you're the WOMAN".
That guy is a sexist asshole that hates women, right?
Edit: This cowardly little morsel replied and instantly blocked me so I can't reply again. Yes he's a complete and utter morsel. I don't use derogatory insults that are against the rules, you can mentally substitute in any word you think is more appropriate.
Morsel?? Is that really the word to be using there?
What? You seem to have something else going on here... there aren't enough details to lie about anything. Lie for whom, and why? Nor do I care enough anyway.
Good luck ghost reborn! maybe this is the life when you'll start to make sense.
Yta
It sounds like he was not on board with sharing his house with your family and their kids.