Ja az tak moc pochopeni nemam, takhle se chovat proste nesmi. Urcite pochopim, kdyz budou treba lehce neprijemni nebo nevrli, protoze predtim trikrat vezli ukopnutej palec a zatrzenej nehet, ale tohle je pres caru no.

Edit: treba chtela jen "vtipem" odlehcit atmosferu 🤷🏻‍♀️😅

Edit 2: mne se to smichalo jeste tady s jednim pribehem, tady bych asi to pochopeni jeste nalezla, ale odpustit si to mohla, to jo.

Se zachrankou jezdi ridic a zachranar, ne sanitar :-) mozna jsi je nastval tim, zes jim rikal sanitari 🫣 kazdopadne ty komentare jsou strasny, pry uhnout a preprat je 🤦🏻‍♀️

Tuhle analogii uz jsem slysela a je to naprosto lichy. Vztah rybar - ryba je uplne jiny nez muz - zena. Nebo mel by byt. Pro koho neni, tak by mel asi radsi zustat sam 😁

Yeah yeah, poor my family. At least I have one.

Exactly. You don't have to understand every decision the mom as a parent made to respect her. You are not able to see another perspective that is what I'm trying to do.

Anyway, if he is that much upset that he punishes his wife, he sounds just like a control freak and the doctor is a lame excuse. The normal reaction would be "oh I wish you had told me and took our daughter to a doctor, but if you spoke to her about it, I'm ok with it, because you are competent parent and I believe you." This is how easy it could be.

And don't "yell" at me, it's rude. Therefore this is my last comment, I don't discuss with rude people, it is a waste of my time.

I try to imagine the situation if it was opposite. I mean they would have a son who told only father. I still can't see a reason why I, as a mom, should be that upset that I didn't know immediately. Also I probably wouldn't rush him to see a doctor. I would ask if they use condoms or another protection and remind him to be careful because of disesases. Or what do you think the doctor told them more? Maybe I'm forgetting something :-) I know you say they need to hear it multiple times, but she is on birth control already, so I guess the doctor told her something about it, school probably too, mom reminded her because she knows that she already had some periods after it. Do you have children? Because mine are too small, so maybe one day I will feel the same way as this dad and now I'm just too optimistic 😀 so I guess maybe you have already an experience with this situation.

Are you from the US? Then yes, I believe especially in southern states the teenage pregnancies can be a thing, like everywhere where there are puritans in power (or at least this is my impression as a European, I have similar feeling about Poland for example).

Podle tech kachlicek i sloupu venku bych taky rekla Ceskomoravskou. Vetsinu zivota jsem zila na Praze 9, takze jestli to neni Ceskomoravska, budu se stydet 😀

NTA. I will never understand how the nipples of a woman are different to the nipples of a man. Boobs? Sure, usually different. Nipples? The same. And bras don't "hide" boobs. So what is inappropriate about not wearing bra? 🤔

Oh ellipsis, thanks, at least I learned something new, I use it as a sarcasm sometimes too, but I didn't detect yours 😁

Maybe it is why she didn't tell him as soon as she knew, because she expected he would start with "ohmygod she has to see a doctor immediately!!!" 😅 I didn't get any information from my doctor by the way. I mean she told me about birth control, some risks and advantages and that was it. STD are taught at school, pregnancy too, also parents should tell you, something you find out yourself.... Maybe in your country it is different :-)

And eclipses are...? I'm used to /s as sarcasm on reddit.

Exactly, nothing to be irked about. So why is he upset, why did he ignored her birthday etc.? He seems strange.

Yeah you are right. So it is even more crazy that he is upset 🤷🏻‍♀️

For me, my daughter's privacy is more important in this case.

She doesn't use drugs, she is not pregnant, she doesn't fail at school - these are things I would share with a husband. Not sex. I would be very unhappy if I told my mum and she told my dad. Would you want your son to go to see a doctor after first sex? It could be useful for boys too. They should hear about diseases or pregnancy too.

I just believe it is important to educate your children before they start with sex. Also she is on birth control, therefore she should go to see a doctor regularly. I really don't see why to inform the dad that his daughter started to have sex with boys. I don't get why he is that upset. I believe that he can be upset to be left out, well, that happens, it's natural that children sometimes prefer one parent over the other, and it is important not to fail their trust.

And I never said that doctors cannot share anything useful about sex. I believe that the mom us not stupid and she knows. She goes to the same check ups.

You talk about sharing information between parents and about agreements how to raise their children - which I agree with, generally. But I talk about the mentioned situation, which is different because it is very private. It is enough when shared with only one parent. Sometimes children don't inform parents at all. For example I feel the same about periods. It is the big milestone for girl too, still I don't see the need to inform a dad when it starts.

Btw, sorry for my English, not my first language and I haven't used for quite a long time. I hope that my comment can be understood.

You don't need to go to the doctor after first sex immediately, really. She is on birth control and had periods. No point to go there, she can go there when she has a regular check-up.

Edit: of course if her regular check up is not like next year, then you are right she could call a doctor and ask if she should come. But I guess the mom knows this too.

But you should teach your children about sex and similar things before they start with it. After first sex, it is too late. Then it is up to kids. She is 16, how should they "handle" her sex life?

He didn't need to know. It was between mom and daughter. If the daughter wanted him to know, she would tell him or tell her mom to tell dad. It is this easy. I don't see why he should be upset this much, honestly I don't see why he should be upset at all. Maybe a little that the daughter doesn't trust him enough, but either his fault or normal shy behaviour of teenager.

Yes but what does this have in common with not being told about daughter's sex life? Also the mom knew, so at least one parent knew. I never told my parents about my first sex and guess what, I'm not criminal and I didn't get pregnant. You should teach your children about birth control, about diseases, dangers, love...but you really don't need to know exact time when they are not virgins anymore. It sounds creepy to me.

I agree we miss some useful information. And I know that this is my personal opinion and other people can think otherwise about themselves - but my first sex was definitely not a major event for my parents, I mean I didn't tell them at all. It was my major private event 😁

I believe it could hurt him. Still, it was not her secret to tell. Maybe it was something he did before and he lost his daughter's trust, maybe it's just that she preferred to tell another woman and was nor comfortable with telling a man. I would understand if my son said some "man things" only to his father, if it was easier for him, and wished my husband didn't tell me.

Exactly. Thank you.

There shouldn't be consequences for the wife at all. I completely agree with liminalspice_girl.

This is great when children know they can tell you anything and don't need to have secrets 🙂👍🏻

But this wasn't her "secret" to tell, that's it. Maybe the daughter just didn't want her dad to know. And how I read the post, I wouldn't be suprised at all. He overreacts and his behaviour is just odd and seems creepy to me. I think it depends on the daughter, if she gave her mum a permission to tell the father or not. I wouldn't be angry at my husband if he didn't tell me.

NTA. I wouldn't tell my husband at all if I knew he usually reacts this way. Also I would not tell him without my daughter's permission.

I would think about why my daughter doesn't trust me enough to tell me or why she trusts her dad more than me with this. And I would try to find out what mistake I made to have lost her trust.