I just want to add one caveat.

I got Botox for years! It was awesome. Best thing ever. Then I got weirdly sick pretty fast. Ended up in the ICU for a week diagnosed with Myasthenis Gravis.

Botox is not recommended for people with autoimmune diseases. Some identified autoimmune diseases identified -

Eller-Danlos - Rheumatoid Arthritis- ALS -

and now my disease, Myasthenia Gravis -

Actually my Neuro says my MG crisis that put me in the ICU was the reason MG was added. lol. All I know is it was added a few months after he reported my diagnosis and crisis. and it’s funny

So Congratulations!! On the baby!

If you are not an autoimmune sufferer then go get that Botox.

Where is your sister’s Ex? Or your parents. Grandma could help - or her friends? There are apps for that. Why only you.

Why do I feel this is to ruin her sister’s plans from jealousy?? Or to make her feel bad about her vacation ??

NTA. Her emergency does NOT trump your long saved for Hawaii vacation.

Absolutely do not carry that fake guilt she tried to lay on you. Have a great time and use sunscreen.

Seriously 9. My first thought. The words Weird and Al will forever be linked

I am in the same boat. Mine is 15 and losing both eyesight and hearing.

She is so needy. Always under my feet. She has tripped me by walking under my feet twice.

I think it’s illegal to participate in hiding a car from the repo man.

Edit:

Straight from google:

In most states, taking these actions won't violate any laws, unless you do it with the intent to defraud the bank. For example, if you normally keep the car locked up in your garage, you can continue to do so. In some states, though, deliberately hiding a car from the repossession company is a crime.

Carnival doesn’t allow that anymore. If they did then complain!!

My mom lost her mind when I divorced “the perfect man”. She invited him everywhere. She knew he was a mean drunk who made my life hell but she thought I was the loser and he was a fighter pilot. Who could be better?

Great news. I really want the best for both of them because they are both trying.

I am sad. I never got any apology. Much less some fruit. It was still my fault every day all day. Once my hubby had to ask my nmom to leave because she was ruining Christmas recounting how I did something that upset her when I was 5.

I was 62 at the time.

She is still mad at me for saying the wrong thing to her at 5.

Now my husband brings fruit and dessert. He’s the child of a n dad. Wonder if he got that from him.

This is the problem! They both have struggled with addiction. Eureka has said recently she just finished another rehab and is feeling better than ever.
Katya is currently in rehab.

I wish them both the best.

I am so sorry your father was so thoughtless. It’s almost be the end of your mom and it sounds like you kept the family and home together through the crisis.

Now it’s time for your father to tell the truth and get to work caring for his family.

HIV is not the horrible diseases it was 20 years ago. Today’s medications are keeping people with HIV undetectable. That means with normal precautions it is undetectable.

Make sure you take care of yourself first. You must insist your Father pick up his responsibilities. - it will be good for him - and get on the correct medications. Hug your mom and your sister.

You did a great job. Hugs. Get tested.

I know that we never really talked about our abuse as kids. I can say that I have seen my nmom in a rage like he had in the video many, many times.

When I was finally allowed to go to other peoples homes I was shocked by how calm everyone was. No one threw the dishes or chased someone up the stairs with a weapon they had found nearby. Book, shoe, can of peas, etc

The 70’s happened.

Or his vehicle will collapse from the weight.

For casual food - with outside seating with a view of the beach at Casino Beach try the Crab House.

WTH ? The problem is not the down payment people!!!

The problem is that the father is angry because they did not move home to be controlled by him. OP gave his father a very realistic reason for saving the rest of the money needed for their down payment. OP’s father is the one who began name calling and is angry.

No one expects newlyweds to pay for plane tickets at this point in their lives.

NTA but OP you may need to give some real thought about why your father became enraged when you did not follow along with his ‘plans’ and what has happened in the past years of your life to make this adult man think he can control you and your wife’s life choices.

Good luck on the house. Two of my children have purchased houses in Colorado and it’s a very tough market. Both couples had to save for many years.

I barely remember a cupcake.

Thank you. My number is - this was a flip phone number- years old. I get so many spam calls it’s insane.

One specific spammer has called me so many times I have a long list of their numbers blocked. I hate faked call numbers.

And yes, I have a family member blocked but he just tries to call from other peoples phones. I had to stop answering any phone number I didn’t know.

Transcribed voice mail is my favorite tool.

lol

Mine does that too! Normally, she jumps up when I go to the kitchen, ignores that hubby is right there , and just starts lapping coffee up. No, hubby just lets her for a few seconds. He thinks it’s funny. I do not. She seems to love my coffee.

Myasthenia Gravis - a neuromuscular autoimmune disease. It causes severe weakness of the voluntary muscles by blocking the neuromuscular junction - where your nerves connect to your muscles to tell them to move. It’s great when you can’t swallow or breathe. It’s apparent I have had this disease all my life but it almost killed me before I got a diagnosis 8 years ago.

So many doctors and so many people calling me lazy - why are you always tired? Just exercise! (The worst thing I could do to myself)

I have some serious arthritis that started in my 30s. I have had both my thumb joints replaced in my early 40s and a knee replacement at 60. I have had several doctors call it RA but since the next doctor says it’s something else every time I just have no idea.

Lichen Sclerosus - it causes my mucus membranes to split open. Key word is mucous membranes —for women it is hell. But hey steroid creams really help.

I have had IBS my whole life So fun.

Fibromyalgia.

Sjogren's syndrome. My eyes bother me 24/7

——

Isn’t being the child of a narc trauma - then adulthood trauma marring a narc then another narc and one more after that - so fun?

I have been narc free for 30 years thanks to my husband - another child of a narc- the rest for my soul has helped me heal - but the damage is deep.

It also helped that I started my long journey of healing. Identifying the fact my mother was a horrible Narcissist - and that I was the Scapegoat of the whole family - not to my Father - (but he was military and gone all the time.)

Here is another point - I recently realized my Father was the child of a Narcissist.

I was repeating a family story of how my grandmother sighed him -and his 2 brothers - to go off to war in WWII. Then they were to send all their paychecks to their mother back home. I believe he only got 15 dollars of his pay a month. Enough to buy cigarettes and some new underwear. He was sighed up at 16. She said he was 17.

I pondered all that generational Narcissistic behavior.

This brought me to understand my father married a narcissistic woman Like His Mother.

I met my mother’s father once. He, had no interest in my mother or our family. After speaking to my cousins as an adult I realized, she also had narcissists in her line her father and step-mother.

I just want to say I broke the generational curse. I had 4 children and zero narcissists. I am very happy.

YTA. You must be a delight to have as a parent.

So your own child is struggling to launch her new life as an adult. You did a google search. You took a commission from the 5 minutes off your time.

And for You to speak in such a demeaning manner about your young adult child!! Seriously?!

I see a very self serving person who has no perception of love or parental support for their child. No wonder she’s done with you.

Were you legally required to give the money to them? NO

Was that a supportive and loving thing to do to your child? NO

Great job.

This is scary. All those blocked spammers too??

I am here for the answer.

I am truly sorry for your loss.

The grief is real. It’s always a shock when someone you cared for dies. It’s OK. to grieve and you should.

However, you were not responsible for his addiction.

You are not responsible.

Please do not let yourself carry any guilt. Addicts control their own destiny. Believe me. It’s hard but you must not carry that burden.

So grieve your loss. But please don’t internalize.

Many hugs.

They don’t want to pay for a second bag. They are wearing the extras.