This morning, I dreamt of the war. And one of the solider in Airforce fell from the aircraft right in front of me while being shot and he was looking at me in terror and asked me to help.

definitely the Healthcare system like what the actual hell is that

1. They claim they don't use social media
2. They refuse to call/FaceTime, or they constantly find excuses for it
3. They lovebomb you within 2 weeks
4. They show a pic and it seems to be cropped from somewhere else (or it's blurry every time)

Hello, I'm sorry for what you've been going through. I understand that you lost someone you've been relying on an who had become part of your daily routine, especially when you devoted your feelings inside. This is not easy to get through when you feel like being abandoned, you may feel like this for a long time, feeling insecure, and have trust issues, etc. Especially under the conditions of your mental situations. Saying goodbye to let go is difficult. But sadly the truth is, I think he already made his point very clear with you.. begging him to come back may not be the best option, not to mention self-harm. I believe that you are a great person. So take your time to feel sad, but also set a time to try taking care of yourself to recover. It's going to take a long time, but you will feel better when you refocus on yourself. Your life still has a really long time to go on, and during your life there will be couple of heartbreaks, you'll grow from it. You are valued.

p.s if you really feel depressed, remember to seek for help

good luck and take care 🧡

for me, I think that sense comes from a thought/feeling that "it's hard to find a compatible person to really communicate, be ourselves, etc and that person will try to understand". The "person" I mentioned here, doesn't have to be a significant other, it could be a friend, a stranger, etc.

I met many people before and have really close friends irl as well, but sometimes this kind of loneliness will strike me out of nowhere as feeling like no one understands me or I don't belong in any group.

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the accuracy

Hey, I think it is better for you 2 to stay as friends. Because even if you get back together, those things may still be bothering you and i dont think it'd end up with a happy result (sorry).

I'm sorry for what had happened to you before, LDR seems to be needing lots of communicate, honest, etc. But I won't say there's not teeny tiny little hope for a happy LDR. I'd suggest you take some time to walk away from these memories and focus on yourself first to heal :)

Wish you all the best!

as someone who lives in dorm with roommates, I always go outside to have a call with someone because I want the privacy and I dont want to bother my roommates.

So I don't think this is a red flag, but I agree with the other comments that try to communicate with him to know more :)

I'm sorry to hear this.. but heartbreaking sucks.. It's driving me crazy and all. I wish you all the best, and let's get over it soon. Send you a virtual hug!

no worries! I'll try to get better soon haha thank you so much 💛

It's okay, just need some time haha Thank you so much tho, wish you all the best as well :)

I felt abandoned / ditched by someone without explanation.

I understand this feeling, wish you all the best. send you an air hug.

Thank you so much. Sadly I think I really lost him, even though I really want an explanation. Because I kinda thought I meant something to him as well (as an important friend).

I want to tag him in the post, but I'm afraid that it'd only make him more mad and less wanting to talk to me again.

Thank you, this means a lot to me.

Hello,

Thank you so much for all these comments, it really made me feel a little bit better and being understood. Sadly, I guess I really lost him for unknown reasons. And it's true that you said I felt abandoned.

I feel really heartbroken because I finally tried to trust someone, but it still ended up in this way. Even he promised, and I thought he would never be the one who'd treat me like this. But I guess I was wrong. Things like this happened a few times to me before, but this reminded me of some nightmares I've been through when I was a teenager. I spent years to recover, or at least tried to be better. Now, that tower is crashed again.

I really want an explanation, but to him we are strangers anyways..

I need some time to cope with this situation, and need a really long time to heal this heartbreak.

Thank you so much for your words, it really means a lot.

I said you're right because I understand and agree. but doesn't mean I am accepting and consuming this idea immediately. Yes, I have major issues to deal with, and I am making excuses for myself. That's true. Because I can't and refuse to face the truth right now. Will I die if I never talk to him again? probably not. but I do feel like dying right now. I won't really commit suicide, but doesn't mean I wasn't suicidal. I want to deal with my deep rooted issues as well, but right now I just feel helpless and can't focus on anything.

Sorry, you are right. Logically/realistically I should not and basically impossible to only want him and no one else. But for me, right now, at this moment, I only want him and want him back. I'm attached, I guess. I'd like to stay as friends with him. I just don't want to lose him and I don't want this kind of troubles affect us. I'm not that 1 percent nor the other 99 percent. I'm an outlier. so that's why when someone shows up in my life and can treat me/face me in the way, I just can't move on from them, I want to cherish them and they'd always have some huge parts in my mind.

I can't.. he seemed to block me already..