A good hostess would have offered you something else to eat. It's not as though she asked you if you wanted her to make donuts and you said Yes and then said you didn't want any.

How long were your visits? I'd go back for two 6-week stays to experience the different weather. It's all fun and games June-August, but what about November-April? I live in perfect weather now and don't know if I could handle the Germany weather year round. Of course, if you're in New England, you should be fine.

Y'all should have a household account where both contribute each month. If your average expenses are around $2000, then each should contribute half of that. Or that amount plus an extra $100 just to be on the safe side. Why are you buying him things? Just say No. He needs to pay for half of the living expenses. You can afford your own place if you're not paying for his sorry ass.

Make sure in the will you leave your daughter $5. I've heard that way it's more difficult for her to contest since she was definitely mentioned and a set amount was given. She can't come back and say you inadvertently forgot her.

She's a placeholder. How many times do people break up and then the guy is engaged within a year to someone else. She's Ms. Right Now. He's keeping his options open and using her finances to help get a house.

I would have told him I was in labor but he should have also responded to your texts and calls. MIL sounds like a drama queen. I don't understand the part about her quitting her job. I've been through major cancer treatment and even so, I was able to work most of the time.

Tell her you won't be able to make it and then ignore any other communication with her. You don't owe anyone anything. It would be different if you promised to dog sit and wanted to back out at the last minute. This is just a get together. She'll live.

Tell him he should learn to mind his own business.

Your body, your choice. Look around and see all of the absentee teenage fathers. No matter what they say, they're not going to take care of the child. That'll fall on you.

Get an abortion and don't get into this situation in the future. Never rely on condoms alone. You're too young and should focus on setting up your life to where getting pregnant will be a welcome surprise.

Break up with him. He doesn't respect you or your boundaries. Tell chica to move her ass to his space. Do not marry this guy and make plans to find a new living arrangement. What's going to happen when y'all have children? He'll volunteer to you to babysit his friends' children or move in other people into your home and expect you to just go with the flow.

Do not let him hijack this day. I'd tell him the plans and take separate cars. He can either go along with y'all's plan or he can go/stay home. You will not allow him to once again make it all about himself. If he's hungry, he can stop and catch up to y'all afterwards. If it's not in the written plans, it's not happening.

Text it out and make him reply saying he knows the parameters so he can't later say he didn't understand.

I'd recommend getting a grown cat to foster. See how the allergies are and then decide if you can tolerate whatever symptoms you encounter. If you get a kitten and it doesn't work out, the kitten stage might be over already and will diminish its chances of getting adopted.

Put a towel down on the bed or sofa or wherever the cat will be spending time and then wash that. My friend is allergic to cats and only when he's near the dander on bed (comforter) or sofa cushions does he start having symptoms.

I'd go to marriage counseling just to find out his thought processes and to clarify what he's thinking. He might already have someone else but doesn't want to take the financial hit plus the kids would hate him for breaking up the marriage by cheating. He's only thinking about himself. It's all about him. In the meantime consult with an attorney to see what your options are. Don't let him dictate what you do. You shouldn't have to live in this situation. Again, it's only benefitting him.

NTA. It's not as though he asked you about your ideas on being a SAHM and that if you wanted that, he would do whatever he had to to make sure you could. No, he decided that he wanted you to be a SAHM. You're an adult and can decide what you want to do. No man should tell you what he wants you to do with your life. Do not throw away your education. I love how guys think that it's OK to suggest something that they wouldn't do themselves. Does he want to be a SAHD if you're salary was such that you only needed one income? Also, make sure he starts learning to take care of a baby. Go visit friends or relatives with babies and let him change some diapers to get practice, etc. so he can't pull the "I don't know how to do it" card. Don't let him weasel out of baby care and household duties as I have read about so many times on Reddit as soon as the baby arrives.

She chose this life. The MIL didn't become this way all of a sudden. OP saw how she was and how her man just put up with it. She then thought that getting married to this situation would be great. 🙄

Tell you called her that because it's a common term of endearment and they're sweet and desirable. Also don't call her that anymore if she doesn't like it. What about snuggle bunny? I've never been one to respond to a nickname like that.

You're going to forfeit $700 because of the self-appointed morality police? You do realize they probably cheat on each other or they swing or they do some other "non-christian" activities. 🙄

And you're volunteering to stay with this alcoholic because??? Are you that lonely? Desperate? Don't say he's a good guy when he's not drunk because that's like saying he's a good guy when he's not beating me. There are plenty of women who are saddled with at least one child they had with an alcoholic. Fine for you but don't do that to a child.

I consider that assault. I wouldn't have wasted a good milkshake on her. I would have thrown the chicken on her and then the water. BTW, the milkshake or Dairy in general is good to help cool the heat from the peppers. Water doesn't do as well. I love spicy food and would never try to make someone eat it. It's not funny.

I would tell your wife to shut this down. Whenever your wife makes a comment about what she heard from MIL, just ignore her. Don't reply. Tell her you will not answer any questions about your activities that she learned from her mother.

You're trapped without having a job. You said he gets rent money in cash. That means he's probably not declaring all of his income on his tax return. That'll end up hurting you should you get a divorce because it'll show him to be able to pay alimony and child support.

I'd start looking for a job while he's gone and stop relying on him. Also start figuring out his finances and consult an attorney should you decide to divorce him. Just don't let on to him that you are considering that. He's shown he puts himself first. You don't have a husband and the kids have an uncle who comes and goes as he pleases.

NTA. Your hubby is still trying to be a "good" son so that his mother won't leave him again. She's manipulating him. I feel bad for him but he should consider how his son will feel if he ends up with a father who treated him like his mother did - turning his attentions elsewhere. His main focus should be on his current family. The one that actually needs him. His mother has a boyfriend who can take care of her. She'll abandon him again, just watch.

Usually, I found companies offer the option to chat to a real person after a few rounds of chatbot nonsense. Rarely does a chatbot help at all. I can't stand them.

If you have any money, buy a mini fridge and microwave and/or toaster oven or air fryer and eat in your room. If you're able to, make some food during the times he's not in the kitchen and freeze and then reheat.

Also, learn from your mother's example. Always put your children ahead of some dude. Be content not having a partner (and not be desperate) until you find a good one.

Divorce this guy. You're just a little more convenient than a mail order bride or au pair from the Philippines or eastern Europe. You're making a mistake if you don't divorce him. You don't win points for being a martyr. Of course, you could always do something that'll have you end up on an episode of Snapped though it's easier to get a divorce.