I love this. Compassionate with the now, yet with eyes on the future.

You have an absolutely beautiful family, my man. I hope your home is always filled with as much joy as shows in this photo.

I completely get that we all have our insecurities about the way we look, but you’re a lucky guy. I looked at the picture and asked myself what on earth she would want changed?

Edit: Oh! And while those kids are so young, get a nice journal to copy down the funny or profound things your kids say. In the moment, think you’ll remember it forever, but there is just too much to hang on to all the good memories. Even into the rocky teenage years, my girls would go pull that journal off the bookshelf after dinner and read quotes from their younger selves. So many good laughs.

It’s awesome that you’re deferring into your 401(k) in your 20s. My career has been with 401(k) plans. A lot of people don’t start until their 40s or even 50s.

Everything you put in there, leave it in. Your future self will be so grateful that you did.

We’ll get off those giants and come kiss me on the mouth.

If this is all through your work, it sounds like you are contributing to a 401(k). You can make pretax and/or Roth deferrals into a 401(k).

A 401(k) is not the same thing as an IRA. They are both retirement investment vehicles, but the rules that govern their operations are not identical.

You are right! I do remember Topanga! I’m in my 40s and I remember what was going on in my teenage brain when I saw the episode where she stopped being so weird and she was clearly attractive.

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What are your decent meals that make you feel like you’re making up for it?

To me, it’s a warm coat. I never had a decent coat when I was growing up. I hated waiting for the bus and even having to go outside for recess during the winter months. God I felt like I was always cold for 4 months out of the year.

Now I make sure I have a variety of types of jackets or coats for different weather and occasions. And I splurged on my kids’ coats to make sure they would be comfortable. God being cold sucks. Probably one of the main forces driving me to work my ass off—so I don’t have to feel so fucking cold.

You could see the truth of the matter if you were willing. Your first loyalty should be to the truth, whether it is for your side or not. And then align yourself with the truth.

I got you, my man. Where are you drinking tonight? I’ll make sure you have some fun.

If you’ve only seen 3 or 4 Reddit posts, then you’re going to see many more fools if you keep hanging around these parts.

Yeah, probably embalming them tho.

Feeling like you still love him is hard. It’s almost like your own feelings are betraying you. I know you already know this, but just to affirm: the feeling of love will fade and then it will get easier.

After I finally got out, I hurt so badly. When I talked to friends about it, I’d say, “I just can’t wait until I don’t love her anymore.”

Take it all and learn from it. Grow and try to understand yourself a little bit better. And accept that we should be loved and treated kindly, just as we want to be doing for the one we are giving our affections to. 😊

I wish I could use AI at work. A lot of the regulations that govern my field change periodically. I would love to be able to ask questions of an AI chatbot instead of wading through the internal revenue code.

Reading through a lot of these is tough. I was in a bad relationship for 3 years. I should have left—I knew I should leave—but somehow I didn’t feel like I could.

It’s like you were describing my experience when you wrote:

…my logic didn’t really work at that time… I am logical in a lot of aspects and use less of my emotions, but when I was with [her], goddamn, I feel like I wasn’t me.

I do feel less alone for having read many of the comments. I’m a fairly intelligent man, but holy smokes did I feel like an idiot and wondered what the hell was wrong with me for putting up with such treatment for so long.

I hope you’re in a good place now and the people close to you care for you well.

Thanks for sharing! She loved it!

My girlfriend is from Taiwan, so raised speaking Mandarin. Every time she sees a white person with a Mandarin tattoo she tells me about the time she saw someone with a tattoo of the character for “table”.

She’s in her 40s and she giggles like a little kid. I’ve heard the story dozens of times but I still love it every time just because she can’t contain herself.

Oh. Also proof that brother was dropped on his head from 20 feet.

Oh god. Drivers in Oregon are not accommodating. Its excessive passive aggressive driving is the flip side to Texas’s outright and blatant aggression.

I’d rather have a drink than have a hot tub.

Belly buttons being the norm? Or things that are the norm being acceptable?

I hope your answer is the former. That would be fun. But, I do think about the latter often.

I’m gonna say that’s the filter you’re seeing it through. It reads totally genuine, nice, and innocent to me.

Nevermind

Didn’t it feel better, though?