Pot, meet kettle.
You made sweeping, condescending remarks denigrating the intelligence and education level of a blanket group of people.
I targeted you with my condescension. Just you.
Alright, I have to know, how many police officers did it take?
Lesen, Schreiben, Rechnen. Lesen, Schreiben, Rechnen. I know I have heard those words before, said in that order. But I'm not German, so I have no idea where or why. Now they are going to be stuck in my head, driving me crazy.
At no point did she suggest her feelings for him had changed, so why would she need to reassure him? And of course it was all about the baby. SHE just went through childbirth. An experience that is both physically and emotionally demanding. All he did was watch. Being hurt by someone expressing their love for the child they just destroyed their own body to bring into this world does not speak very highly to his emotional intelligence.
I get the feeling you are not very old or experienced. Nor do you seem very educated yourself. If you actually knew anything about early childhood development you would know that both words and actions are important.
Furthermore, in no sane world should a spouse be put before a child. That would be incredibly irresponsible. Your actions, your choices, brought that child into existence. They're life is literally your responsibility in every definition of the word. They cannot take care of themselves. Your spouse, presuming they are not severely handicapped, can take care of themselves. They are suppose to be your partner, not another child you have to constantly care for.
No one is suggesting he should be treated poorly. Nor is there any evidence here that OP has done so. But she should not have to apologize or go out her way to cater to his childish insecurities. Especially not for simply professing her love for her new child in a very vulnerable and emotional moment.
Theoretically it is possible within the first week, but there is a significant chance for false positives, which is why they say to wait 2 weeks and try again. But as you say, people checking that early are the ones trying to conceive.
The human body is crazy. My wife's periods are different everytime and her cycles are never the same. For both her pregnancies (1 living, 1 missed) we didn't know until 5-6 weeks.
Theoretically it can show up within the first week. But she would have to know to take the test and there is a statistically significant chance for false positives.
My concern is how does she know she is pregnant after only two weeks? Most women don't even know until around six. I mean sure, it's possible, but somewhat unusual. Are her periods just that reliable?
Normally, I just make sure he is comfortable, with a good place to hide. This year is different, though. My orange tabby just had his tail amputated(carcinoma.) So he is very, very high right now. He is not an overly active cat, so they didn't give me any sedatives for him. I'm thinking maybe that was a mistake, as he currently appears to be very concerned that his shadow is following him.
Dismissal of his feelings? At no point does she dismiss his feelings. He is the one who has her thinking there is something wrong with hers. She is the one asking if she is TA. All she did was express her feelings for her new child. She didn't say anything about him. She just gave birth, for Christ sake. She literally just had her insides rearranged, pushed out an entire new human, and is now trying to heal from that. You think he is the one being neglected? She should not be the one taking care of him, he should be taking care of her. He is butt hurt because his partner loves their kid. Those aren't valid feelings. Those are the feelings of an insecure, self-centered child.
You sound like an incel. In her description, OP was not being an asshole. Can the hormones make a woman act irrational or out of character? Sure. After giving birth my wife became absolutely convinced that our daughter was going to suffocate in her sleep. I don't mean she was a little worried about SIDS. I mean she felt like she knew it was going to happen. Post partem depression is a very real thing. But again, OP wasn't being an asshole. OP didn't say anything mean or insulting to the boyfriend. She didn't tell him that she didn't love him, or loved him less than she did before. She was simply describing how she felt about her new child. Does everyone feel that same level of love for their kid? No, and there is nothing wrong with that. It is the boyfriend taking her love for her child as an insult to himself that is the issue. That is the behavior of an insecure child.
Everyone on here describing how they felt the same way aren't doing it to put the boyfriend down, they are doing it to let OP know that she is not alone, and that she is NTA for feeling that way.
It is the same. A parent who has not given birth experiences the same neurological changes as a parent who has given birth.
Right. I expect my wife to put our child before me. I would be pissed if she didn't.
Maybe. I think it's a bit of both. Something does change in us, we know this for a fact. Thought patterns shift and neural pathways change after becoming a parent. In both men and women. But it's not how you feel about it that changes, you still find those bodily fluids just as gross. It is your capability that changes. You are better able to put those thoughts aside(and suppress your gag reflex) to do what needs to be done.
I'm a father to a wonderful 3 year old daughter. I was completely unprepared for the way I feel for her. It is unlike anything I have felt before and I said pretty much the same thing after she came into our lives. I tell my wife that it isn't so much that I love one more than the other, so much as it is that I feel them differently. It is like how we feel different kinds of pain. Some pain is dull, but relentless. Front and center when you think about it, lurking in your periphery when you're not. Another pain is sharp and acutely intense. It demands your attention, burning so brilliantly it dazzles you, while also cutting so deeply you feel it in your bones. Both kinds of pain can be just as agonizing as the other, but there is definitely a difference between them.
Your husband needs to grow up and get over it. I expect my wife to put our child before me. Why shouldn't it be that way? Should your husband's parents be hurt by his love for you? Obviously not. One does not diminish the other, they are simply different.
NTA. It's not a competition.
Yes! He will eat other brands but the Smartfood popcorn is his favorite.
I think you need to clarify that statement....actually, you know what, don't clarify it. Just don't.
Things a teacher would say to parents on parent teacher night if they didn't care about being fired
ScenesFromAHat