This happened this morning and some folks over in r/boomersbeingfools said it belonged here. Figured I'd see what y'all thought. Wasn't sure what flair to give it so I just went with matched energy.
Long time lurker, first time poster, let's start there. A little pertinent info next: I don't exactly strike people as what I am, by outward appearances. I'm a little under six feet, I'm very nearly 200lbs, and a nearly 40yo dude with a shitload of hair. I drive a Prius. I'm queer (bi). I'm also a veteran, a lifelong horseman and my job is inherently dangerous.
Next, setting: Local Dunkin near a job site I'll be on all week.
Walked in, Boomer audibly scoffed when he laid eyes on me. We're already off to a great start. He's wearing a USS Jimmy Carter hat (tacky). I ignore him, use the can, order my breakfast and get ready to roll out when I hear him say "Hey boy" and I looked around.
"Yeah, you"
"I'm sorry, did you just call me boy?"
"Yeah, I wanted to ask you something"
I tell him "You can try saying excuse me next time, I have to go to work" and I turn to leave.
"Well, excuuuuuuse me, but what're you people thinking walking around looking like that?"
I blinked at him.
"Well?"
"What people?"
"You know..." He did a limp wrist hand thing here. I shit you not.
"Who? F*****s?" I answered and he didn't know wtf to make of that.
"No, I mean..."
"Lemme ask you this, bubba, does your wife suck cock?" That's where he went full on spluttering
"How dare you! Who do you think you are, asking a man if his wife....does that?"
"I suck cock. I enjoy it. It's fun. Why can't you just tell me if your wife does?"
He didn't really have an answer.
"Okay, so if you're not willing to have a conversation about sexuality, don't ask me about mine. And next time you address a f*****, you better be goddamn sure you're not talking to a fucking soldier who served in a real fucking branch of the military. I am the infantry. Follow me. Cocksucker."
That last is part of the Infantryman's Creed, my MOS when I was enlisted. He didn't really seem to have a whole lot to say at that point so I just left.
Note: I have nothing against the Navy, I was just being a cunt to a cunt, and I'm well aware he was entirely too old to serve on the Jimmy Carter. I don't know why he was wearing the hat and don't particularly care.
🤣🤣🤣 yaaaaas. Don't start shit if you're not ready to get messy, man! Why to put a stopper on that man's nonsense!