[](#/RES_SR_Config/NightModeCompatible)

#Need help with your relationship? 

######Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! 

1. **Posts must contain a title _that includes basic information such as ages, genders, length of relationship_ with text that has a description, a TLDR, and a direct answerable question.**

2. **All submissions must request advice on a specific situation between two or more people**. No submissions *giving advice*, no links, no youtube videos, hypotheticals, general discussion/DAE/polls, adverts, or spam. 

3. **No moral judgment requests.** Moral judgement requests are asking people to evaluate actions taken or actions you want to take, in the context of right, wrong, selfish, or not selfish etc. For what a moral judgement question would be [please see this post.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/)

4. **Things this sub can't give advice on**: Rants, unsolicited advice, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, mental health issues, medical health issues, legal problems, financial problems, any situations involving minors (under 18 regardless of local laws), and any situations involving abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. 

5. **You can submit an update post exactly once at any time after 48 hours has past from the original post.**

6. **Surveys, information requests, journalistic and academic research questions must be sent to modmail here and approved prior to posting.** If you're doing educational work, [message us](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) with your IRB number, a point of contact for us to verify your pending research, and the details of your research for consideration. Press Requests must be routed through u/eganist (via modmail. [message us](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice)) before communicating with users directly.


************************

1. **All comments must be on topic and focus on the OP, in good faith.** Give good, ethical advice. Derailing arguments, jokes, fights, and moral whataboutism is not allowed. Remember, the goal is to help your fellow human.

2. **Keep it civil**. No name calling, insults, or insensitive language ([details](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/insults)). Insulting anyone (be it OP, the subject of the post, someone you know/used to know, users, etc) will result in post/comment removal, and the user being banned. This includes, but is not limited to: Whore, ho, hoe, slut, bitch, idiot, moron, slut shaming (including "I can't get over their past"), slurs against someone's racial, ethnic, religious, gender or sexual identity. ***Please note that this is not an all-inclusive list.***. You will be banned. All bans in this sub are permanent. You don't get a free pass. We do not care who started it, or how deserving you think the subject of your ire.

3. **No referencing hateful or abusive subs/individuals and content**. No espousing rhetoric/linking to subs or content that is conspiratorial in nature, transphobic, anti-women/men, anti-LBGT+, that promote anti-vaxx or anti-science content, or contains harmful rhetoric against groups of people. You will be banned. All bans in this sub are permanent. You don't get a free pass. [More information can be found here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index)

4. **Do not directly message other users.** 
If you wish to opine on the matter at hand, you are to comment on the post. Users found to be privately messaging other users to circumvent this directive will be met with a permanent, irrevocable ban. 

**If a user has sent you harassing messages, please upload your screenshot to Imgur.com, and notify the mods via modmail. We will action the user accordingly.**


##Other helpful communities:

[](#a)[AskMenOver30](/r/askmenover30) [](#b)[AskWomenOver30](/r/askwomenover30)

[](#c)[Dead Bedrooms](/r/DeadBedrooms) [](#d)[Ex? No Contact.](/r/ExNoContact)

[](#e)[Feminism](/r/Feminism) [](#f)[Masculism](/r/masculism)

[](#g)[LGBT](/r/LGBT) [](#h)[r/ainbow](/r/ainbow)

[](#i)[Long Distance](/r/LongDistance) [](#j)[OkCupid](/r/OkCupid/)

[](#k)[Polyamory](/r/Polyamory/) [](#l)[Rape Counseling](/r/RapeCounseling)

[](#m)[Sane... or Psycho?](/r/saneorpsycho) [](#n)[Self](/r/Self)

[](#o)[Sex](/r/Sex) [](#p)[We Met Online](/r/WeMetOnline)

[](#sw)[Suicide Watch](/r/suicidewatch)

---

If you or someone you know is involved in an abusive relationship or would like information on warning signs to watch out for, check out [The Red Flag Campaign](http://www.theredflagcampaign.org/).

<div class="md"><a href="#/RES_SR_Config/NightModeCompatible"></a>

<h1>Need help with your relationship?</h1>

<h6>Whether it&#39;s romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we&#39;re here to help!</h6>

<ol>
<li>Posts must contain a title that includes basic information such as ages, genders, length of relationship with text that has a description, a TLDR, and a direct answerable question.</li>
<li>All submissions must request advice on a specific situation between two or more people. No submissions giving advice, no links, no youtube videos, hypotheticals, general discussion/DAE/polls, adverts, or spam. </li>
<li>No moral judgment requests. Moral judgement requests are asking people to evaluate actions taken or actions you want to take, in the context of right, wrong, selfish, or not selfish etc. For what a moral judgement question would be <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/">please see this post.</a></li>
<li>Things this sub can&#39;t give advice on: Rants, unsolicited advice, letters to an ex, &quot;body counts&quot; or number of sexual partners, mental health issues, medical health issues, legal problems, financial problems, any situations involving minors (under 18 regardless of local laws), and any situations involving abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. </li>
<li>You can submit an update post exactly once at any time after 48 hours has past from the original post.</li>
<li>Surveys, information requests, journalistic and academic research questions must be sent to modmail here and approved prior to posting. If you&#39;re doing educational work, <a href="https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice">message us</a> with your IRB number, a point of contact for us to verify your pending research, and the details of your research for consideration. Press Requests must be routed through <a href="/u/eganist">u/eganist</a> (via modmail. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice">message us</a>) before communicating with users directly.</li>
</ol>

<hr/>

<ol>
<li>All comments must be on topic and focus on the OP, in good faith. Give good, ethical advice. Derailing arguments, jokes, fights, and moral whataboutism is not allowed. Remember, the goal is to help your fellow human.</li>
<li>Keep it civil. No name calling, insults, or insensitive language (<a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/insults">details</a>). Insulting anyone (be it OP, the subject of the post, someone you know/used to know, users, etc) will result in post/comment removal, and the user being banned. This includes, but is not limited to: Whore, ho, hoe, slut, bitch, idiot, moron, slut shaming (including &quot;I can&#39;t get over their past&quot;), slurs against someone&#39;s racial, ethnic, religious, gender or sexual identity. Please note that this is not an all-inclusive list.. You will be banned. All bans in this sub are permanent. You don&#39;t get a free pass. We do not care who started it, or how deserving you think the subject of your ire.</li>
<li>No referencing hateful or abusive subs/individuals and content. No espousing rhetoric/linking to subs or content that is conspiratorial in nature, transphobic, anti-women/men, anti-LBGT+, that promote anti-vaxx or anti-science content, or contains harmful rhetoric against groups of people. You will be banned. All bans in this sub are permanent. You don&#39;t get a free pass. <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index">More information can be found here.</a></li>
<li>Do not directly message other users. 
If you wish to opine on the matter at hand, you are to comment on the post. Users found to be privately messaging other users to circumvent this directive will be met with a permanent, irrevocable ban. </li>
</ol>

If a user has sent you harassing messages, please upload your screenshot to Imgur.com, and notify the mods via modmail. We will action the user accordingly.

<h2>Other helpful communities:</h2>

<a href="#a"></a><a href="/r/askmenover30">AskMenOver30</a> <a href="#b"></a><a href="/r/askwomenover30">AskWomenOver30</a>

<a href="#c"></a><a href="/r/DeadBedrooms">Dead Bedrooms</a> <a href="#d"></a><a href="/r/ExNoContact">Ex? No Contact.</a>

<a href="#e"></a><a href="/r/Feminism">Feminism</a> <a href="#f"></a><a href="/r/masculism">Masculism</a>

<a href="#g"></a><a href="/r/LGBT">LGBT</a> <a href="#h"></a><a href="/r/ainbow">r/ainbow</a>

<a href="#i"></a><a href="/r/LongDistance">Long Distance</a> <a href="#j"></a><a href="/r/OkCupid/">OkCupid</a>

<a href="#k"></a><a href="/r/Polyamory/">Polyamory</a> <a href="#l"></a><a href="/r/RapeCounseling">Rape Counseling</a>

<a href="#m"></a><a href="/r/saneorpsycho">Sane... or Psycho?</a> <a href="#n"></a><a href="/r/Self">Self</a>

<a href="#o"></a><a href="/r/Sex">Sex</a> <a href="#p"></a><a href="/r/WeMetOnline">We Met Online</a>

<a href="#sw"></a><a href="/r/suicidewatch">Suicide Watch</a>

<hr/>

If you or someone you know is involved in an abusive relationship or would like information on warning signs to watch out for, check out <a href="http://www.theredflagcampaign.org/">The Red Flag Campaign</a>.
</div>

t5_2r0cn

Need help with your relationship? Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help!

<div class="md">Need help with your relationship? Whether it&#39;s romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we&#39;re here to help!
</div>

#Your post should 

- Have a detailed title. "Need help" is not detailed enough. 
- Describe briefly the individuals involved
- A brief run down of the problem 
- A desired outcome
- Request for advice 
- A tl:dr 

Good posts are around 300-500 words and contain the above. 

Things your post cannot be 

- A rant without a question 
- A poll or general discussion topic
- Unsolicited advice on any subject
- A letter to someone else 
- A request for DMs
- A shitpost 
- Advertisement for your youtube/blog/social media 
- Topic about minors (under 18)
- Abuse of any kind

#No more judgments 

Your post is a moral judgement if it contains any of the following 

- Is it normal?
- Is it right/wrong?
- Am I right/wrong?
- Any variation of “Am I The Asshole?”, including AITA
- Would I be the asshole if….?
- Does anybody else,,.?
- Should I have done this…?
- Am I justified…?
- Is this a big deal?
- Is this reasonable?

If your post can be answered with a yes or no question, it’s moral judgement and will be removed.

<div class="md"><h1>Your post should</h1>

<ul>
<li>Have a detailed title. &quot;Need help&quot; is not detailed enough. </li>
<li>Describe briefly the individuals involved</li>
<li>A brief run down of the problem </li>
<li>A desired outcome</li>
<li>Request for advice </li>
<li>A tl:dr </li>
</ul>

Good posts are around 300-500 words and contain the above. 

Things your post cannot be 

<ul>
<li>A rant without a question </li>
<li>A poll or general discussion topic</li>
<li>Unsolicited advice on any subject</li>
<li>A letter to someone else </li>
<li>A request for DMs</li>
<li>A shitpost </li>
<li>Advertisement for your youtube/blog/social media </li>
<li>Topic about minors (under 18)</li>
<li>Abuse of any kind</li>
</ul>

<h1>No more judgments</h1>

Your post is a moral judgement if it contains any of the following 

<ul>
<li>Is it normal?</li>
<li>Is it right/wrong?</li>
<li>Am I right/wrong?</li>
<li>Any variation of “Am I The Asshole?”, including AITA</li>
<li>Would I be the asshole if….?</li>
<li>Does anybody else,,.?</li>
<li>Should I have done this…?</li>
<li>Am I justified…?</li>
<li>Is this a big deal?</li>
<li>Is this reasonable?</li>
</ul>

If your post can be answered with a yes or no question, it’s moral judgement and will be removed.
</div>

Am I shallow for being disappointed my (28F) date (30M) showed up to our first date wearing sweats & a t shirt?