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NRE can have the effect of chilling communication with other partners. So, this might be something that resolves after a while.
You can choose to wait it out, and in the meantime do work towards not needing that kind of validation.
You can also end that relationship, because it's not meeting the bare minimum for long distance, where communication is 99% of the available interaction.
Only you can determine that, though.
Its not that I need the validation, but someone I love dropping me like an old toy that got boring just hurts.. sure I get that someone new may be exiting, thanks for bringing that point to my head, but I feel like that doesnt make ignoring your other partners okay :/ Thank you
I went through this. The first week of it I gave them grace. The second week of it I vulnerably let them know that my feelings were hurt and asked about checking in.
After they fumbled that, the third week I broke up with them.
They got over their situation about a week or two after that and came back, but I feel like I got crucial information about how they hinge. & it doesn’t meet my needs.
I think you've fallen into the trap of feeling 'free time is my time'.
Ask for direct time with just you.
No dude. I dont ask for all his free time, wtf. I literally said that he has been ignoring me for multiple days, and that this hurts. Thats not the same as wanting all free time, its worlds apart.
The point was that you should schedule time together (like a "date") when it's convenient for both of you to not be distracted and focus on each other. If your partner isn't willing to spend quality time with you, then why are you even with them?
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Here's the original text of the post:
Im keeping it short and simple My long distance partner has recently started flirting, etc with someone new, which is great for them! Cool. He also has a girlfriend which is no problem for me at all. Good for them.
But now my problem isnt that by itself, its just that the last few days hes started to leave me on read constantly, no matter the time or topic. Since its long distance, I just feel so lonely because thats the only communication.. and now hes ignoring me
I cant help but feel replaced and forgotten. Weve talked before about how behavior like that makes me feel very insecure and hurts, so I dont see the point in bringing it up again, but I just dont know what to do
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For me, I just need communication when there are changes to our routine. It doesn't really matter if it's for another partner, taking care of a sick parent, work, etc.
I wouldn't stay in a relationship with someone who didn't care enough about me to keep me informed on those types of changes. And I definitely wouldn't stay with someone who ignored me for days, especially if I've already brought up that it hurts me and they don't care.
Do you have scheduled, dedicated time together?
No, usually it has worked out great to just see when we have time, due to us both having school and work, family etc Its just been the last days when he started seeing someone new that it has gone to basically zero time suddently
I’m so sorry to hear that cutie, I’d suggest taking a break calmly and reaching out to someone new to, doesn’t have to be flirty or relationship talk but I’d suggest going for someone else for a change, give the ldr a rest and time to recover from his new experiences and start some fun on your own, unless that just makes you uncomfy, then perhaps some solo experiences, go the gym a little extra, clean a bit more, fill your time with beautiful sites and food
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