www.news.com.au/technology/online/internet/remote-amazon-tribe-finally-connects-to-internet-only-to-wind-up-hooked-on-porn-social-media/news-story/6abfea69d9dd7e49541ef46eb61558c4
Remote Amazon tribe finally connects to internet — only to wind up hooked on porn, social media
Homegrown Simpsons stuff
Pornhub,xtube, they know these names better than their own grandmothers!
If I was a big old fat guy with a big bushy beard, would you still be yelling at me? Or would you be spanking my bare butt, balls, and back?
Think about that for one second.
Yeah right, you're dawwwg shit. YOU'RE FUCKING DAWG SHIT
Nobody is getting spanked…
I used to be a piece of shit in the comments
If I saw that guy I'd ask him to come star in Crashmoore 2 because Santa is NOT working out
Absolute fucking bullshit. Unprofessional bullshit. It's why no one watches AOL Blast.
We gotta find the guy that gave them those phones and give him a spanking!
Maybe you could do it, ma'am?
I’m sorry but it’s a shame I’m the first to upvote all of this perfectly placed itysl banter.
So it’s only right if you use something to give right?
You grabbed my shirt! You hit me in the cup! YOU CAN’T DO THAT!!!
Don't send me videos of loud wrestlers!
Someone’s got to do it!
I like that quote. You knew I’d like that quote
A looot of people give..
Paul may look like a hot dog…
Do any of these fuckers ever bust out of the Amazon and have like a huge cumshot?
Nobody even watches porn on their computers anymore.
How would one upvote a comment a million times?
Tribe leaders daughter gets stuck in hole
What are you doing step-tribesman?
Overwatch porn and dancing bear. Obviously.
Holy shit dancing bear, that takes me back like 15 years. 😪
Tentacle stuff mostly.
So vanilla
It takes time to ease into the more peculiar interests.
That wicked woman! Do you know she asked me to pretend I was your friend since childhood? Man like I'd do something like that to you. We've been friends since childhood!
this show has consistently been better than it has any right to be
It's so absurd and good. Nothing like Family Guy, especially since it moved to TBS
The last few seasons I've seen had Soren Bowie writing for it, and his episodes are comic genius!
the super out there fetishes like farting on cakes, sitting on balloons, and my little pony. It's mostly because they're interested in cakes, balloons and ponies.
The Lost Birthday Party Tribe of Marubo
I watched the "eating a bowl of froot loops and milk out of another girls ass" video the other day and it was as dope as I remember, but I guess they wouldn't be into it if they've never had froot loops
Dragons fucking cars
No, I think it's an epic question.
I hope to God it's footwear .
User deleted comment
1mo
Futa is a popular sneakers brand in Brazil, they use to be very cheap, but in recent years, due to the mismanagement of the government their prices skyrocketed and it became popular among the middle and upper class as a stat symbol. For more information search for "Futa inflation"
Waluigi hentai
Nationalgeographic.com
Edit: on a similar train of thought...
Kids these days have it so easy with the internet. When I was a kid, in order to masturbate I had to find the Sears catalog and go to the lingerie section. But nowadays I can just go to sears.com.
- Dan Mintz
Fat bitches fightin’ over food
Hell yeah
Rabbit hole of amateur kink, probably.
User deleted comment
1mo
I clicked, misunderstood the description, thinking it was just gonna pics of actual bugs mating. Clicked on one image and noped tf outta there.
See, I wasn't gonna click it. Then I read your comment and went "Oh, it's probably like "step" incest or something mild. Let's see if I'm more depraved than he is in what I can accept." Nope. It's worse. Especially that top one about the roach mother. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Please share. I don't want to click it but I am curious.
I can't do that. It's something you have to experience for yourself.
I dared to click it and now, I feel enlightened, as though I have a tangible purpose in life
I mean, it's good to set realistic goals.
I have a question. If people who dress up as animals and fuck are called furries, what do you call those who dress up as bugs and fuck? Crunchies?
Scurries.
I may have just developed a new bigotry.
Buggers
Jfc weird how it kinda grows on ya
That reminds me of that one root beer scene from Star Trek, where they are initially disgusted by it, but comment that the worst part about it is that if you drank enough you would start to like it.
Feelings of disgust (or any strong emotion) and arousal are closely related. That's why there are so many "gross" fetishes. So something like a bug can trigger a feeling of disgust, but when you are already in a sexual context, like seeing it in hentai, that can trigger arousal instead.
And in the end, I'm just happy that the people on that sub have a safe and enjoyable outlet that won't hurt them or others. At the end of the day, that's what really matters most.
I now know this exists and I don't know what to do with that information.
Hmm, more members than I anticipated
Well the article says the tribe is generally "chaste" and frowns upon even kissing in public, so I'm guessing just some vanilla stuff by our standards
Soo… just like the rest of the world?
One of us! One of us!
I'm thinking this article is kind of redundant, all it proves is they're human
Nah, it's actually useful info. The fact that it hit them so hard means it really is a naturally addicting thing, rather than a "moral failing" of the newer generations
We didn't start the fire
the 0->100 probably made it have a bigger effect
Username checks out
They don't really have many means of easy accessible instant dopamine release. People that live like this are way more susceptible to addiction. It is very import to keep drugs and alcohol away from these type of tribes.
I’ve often wondered if we brought Mozart, DaVinci, etc. to the present if they would end up just locking themselves in a bathroom furiously masturbating all the time
Sometimes, i would imagine we all have the potential to change the world but here we are furiously masturbating.
I like to think I'm pretty calm and quiet with the occasional grunt when I'm masturbating
Calm and quiet means you’re not properly exercising your arm muscles, you need pump up those reps otherwise you’ll never win the tournament.
I always train at the sperm bank, because the staff are super supportive. They always tell me "please masturbate in the cup".
Really? They're such puritans around here, they always tell me to stop masturbating, usually as soon as I walk in the door
While furiously marinating. Edit meant masturbating, but I’m gonna leave it.
Why are you guys so furious?
User deleted comment
1mo
Davi Carradine just entered the chat...
TIL about how he passed thanks to you lol. But ya gotta wonder; did he shoot any white line, before he flat lined? Like, I hope he peaked before the roller coaster flew off the tracks
Speak for yourself, I'm sitting here watching Iron Chef
furiously masturbating
Furious masturbation is how I clear my mind enough to dream up things that will change the world.
Just them ADHD things
Ben Franklin would whack it to granny porn while fully naked, with the windows open
The windows need to be open to circulate clean air and reduce the spread of disease. He had this discussion with Senior Wanks-a-lot John Adams.
Are you sure it wasn’t John Handcock?
John Adams categorically did not wank. It is recorded for all posterity. In excruciating detail. He did not believe in expelling emissions outwith his betrothed which possibly is why he was so awful to be around (or bad at parties if you will). If only he had taken a gander in his own garden once in his life. But Abigail was a catch so understandable (apparently).
Anal granny porn. As he preferred it "Arseways".
Not making that up, he wrote that in a letter.
Franklin would be a total goon lol
Dude wrote an essay about standing up to fart loudly. He gave zero fucks.
He likes the breeze on his nuts.
He would also do so, so much blow.
GOOD FOR THE HUMORS
Ben Franklin would be making his own amateur porn of himself and the local granny residential home orgy
The difference is that Ben essentially already did this, just minus the modern porn. Dude was a certified freak, no need for technology.
Next Horizon Zero Dawn game will just be Aloy trying to stop a whole tribe’s addiction to furry porn after giving them access to APOLLO.
My first college project in 2009 was to make an OFFLINE library of the internet. we made our own firefox to work the 4 TB of data.
MIT open courseware, gutenberg, Wiki offline, Sexual health knowledge, well building, agriculture...
Anything that was free we put on 4tb of Hard drives which seagate donated.
I made over 100+ libraries around the world for people who had no internet.
Was my favorite project so far.
The internet is a human right, our knowledge should be shared.
I agree. The internet is just a tool. It’s how we use it is what matters.
Futurama addressed this with that cautionary film!
Bender, are you jacking on in there?
DON'T DATE ROBOTS
Humanoid sexbots of our favorite celebrity crush
They'd still get stuff done. The Masterbating Bear has written 5 symphonies and has several patents.
You often imagine Mozart and DaVinci furiously masturbating? Like together or what
At the beginning Mozart alone, then DaVinci hears noise and comes to look what it is...
No, but DaVinci would probably end up as one of those furry artists drawing porn while masturbating constantly. The question this raises is if he'd invent a better fucking machine.
He would invent a better bad dragon. The badder dragon.
Maybe some would. I don't think it's that our culture is inherently bad. Though modern global culture certainly isn't great. But you can just reach into the past & expect awesome people from earlier eras to only see the possibilities of all that technology.
Many, maybe most, might get overwhelmed & disassociate instead.
We're able to live with all this, to varying degrees, because we either grew up with it, or it developed alongside us.
You could also send some random medieval peasant to the present and maybe they would become a captain of industry. I think some people thrive in their circumstances and some suffer under those same circumstances. There’s always going to be someone who is stuck as a farmer, that could’ve been a groundbreaking artist.
The only person I know for sure who would is Ben Franklin, actually he’d probably die of a heart attack from just the excitement of seeing all the freaky sex stuff he can do now, Or he’d travel the world doing it all, like he did when we was alive though this time he’s not limited to just traveling France and Britain.
He would absolutely love banging hoors on every continent
Humans are suckers for quick and easy dopamine fixes. Masturbation, mobile games, social media... all give us that. We're totally fucked as a result. It's so much worse when you have ADD/ADHD, since you're already having issues with dopamine, constantly seeking a fix makes it a non-stop problem.
Mozart would probably enjoy something else more in a bathroom.
Oh no, I expected them to immediately get into philosophy podcasts and quantum physics videos. /s
They actually got hooked on Mr.Beast and fortnight let's play videos.
Lmao this is funnier than the porn. I'm just imagining a bunch of indigenous people all huddled around some 1995 laptop watching Mr. Beast running freight trains into Bugattis.
Ironically I wouldn't put it past him being the one to donate the laptops to them.. so they can sub to his channel.
that would be too embarassing to admit, so they just said "porn"
One young woman said she wants to move to the city and become a dentist. Like the person at the end of the article says, I think this is getting overblown. It's a very catchy headline
And some tribes people have been victims to scammers... Hold up, wbat, what type of scams are these that target hunter-gather peoples and who going to stop them accidentally sharing their cyrpto keys or transferring large sums of money out of their tribal bank accounts.
Probably scamming young tribe males and females to use them for labor or sexual reasons. Im sure plenty of people would pay money to see some young tribe womans onlyfans.
It is the same clickbait as the one that parroted a poorly made research "Influencer is now the most popular job among youth"or something like that, while if you open the "study" the stat comes from a question that was worded in roughly this manner "would you become a content creator if success was guaranteed and you could live comfortably?", i think the answer for literally anyone with a brain would be yes.
Everyone loves a good pair of tiddies
PBS Space Time ?
We come back in 20 years and the tribesmen are all discussing black hole evaporation in Australian accents.
Are they reading this thread? Hello? Your necklaces are cool. Will you guys do an AMA?
That would actually be super interesting!
Didnt you read the title, they are too busy masturbating!
What is this world coming to.
They skipped straight past stupid cat videos and went straight for the porn? Some people!
the internet has been used for porn way longer than cat videos. cat videos really hit their stride like 2008-2012. porn, about 10-15 years prior to that.
My first college project in 2009 was to make an OFFLINE library of the internet. we made our own firefox to work the 4 TB of data.
MIT open courseware, gutenberg, Wiki offline, Sexual health knowledge, well building, agriculture...
Anything that was free we put on 4tb of Hard drives which seagate donated.
I made over 100+ libraries around the world for people who had no internet.
Was my favorite project so far.
The world is in fact coming.
What are you doing step-tribesmen
Oh, sorry...I thought you were stuck in that basket.
Those village elders are total VEILFs.
Word around the tribe is you've got a fat cock.
That's not a secret. You can literally see it flopping out my loincloth.
The article and photos just makes the whole thing sound like a Southpark episode
Gonna be a lot of spooky ghosts with all their ectoplasm in the rainforest now
all Marubo use the same last name
This immediately made me think of South Park.
... they’re learning the ways of the white people.”
LMAO
Stop putting fruit in the potato salad!
I will say that, as a very white person, I don't know anyone who has ever (or WOULD ever) put raisins in potato salad. That is a sin unto barbecue foods.
They have been handed the weapons of mass-turbation
They’re appropriating our culture!
Just wait until they start with the pranking.
There was a post on Reddit, from a teacher in (iiirc) Japan, who lamented this week that “skibidi” had made it into her students’ lexicon finally. I can only imagine that’s not far off for them, either.
“When it arrived, everyone was happy,” Tsainama Marubo, 73, told The New York Times. “But now, things have gotten worse. Young people have gotten lazy because of the internet, they’re learning the ways of the white people.”
Hey, that's cultural approbation.
/s
Modern day version of the British giving the indigenous people blankets with smallpox.
Guns, Germs, Steel, and Porn.
Chips, Clicks, and Tits
By Jared Diamond
I'm just going to go burn my anthropology degree now.
More like the British giving the Chinese opium.
how uncontacted were they? Did they make their own glasses?
Are they all literate, or do they have just one dude who had to type all the kinky stuff in for them and pretend he’s cool with it?
Ready for those r/infographics posts detailing the most searched porn subjects by location.
I hope it’s off-the-wall kinky shit.
I imagine their first viewing being like that one scene in Fifth Element where she’s watching and learning of humanity’s history from the screen.
I can’t wait for Pornhub Wrapped 2024
What a disingenous source, the original NYT report clearly states there were benefits such as easier access to healthcare & emergency services online. Painting it as “they got internet and now bad thing” is sensationalism at its worse.
https://www.nytimes.com/2024/06/02/world/americas/starlink-internet-elon-musk-brazil-amazon.html
This article did mention that.
They were also upset that Amazon.com was taken.
news.com.au is a Murdoch owned rag. Of course they used a sensationalised headline.
Technological advancements solve old problems while creating new ones. The same technology that allows us to mass produce medicine also allows for industrialized processed foods and intoxicants, leading to increases in diseases rarely encountered in the ancient world like diabetes and lung cancer, but making it so that staph infections and childbirth are far less lethal. The same technology that allows for ease of transportation of people and goods also causes climate change. So it always goes. Highlighting just the good or just the bad is either overly optimistic or overly pessimistic. Ultimately it is up to the given social community to weigh the risks vs the benefits of adopting a new technology.
you didn’t read the article
The article still paints it as a bad thing. It certainly seems to be beneficial on the whole, but some of the elders just seem to be going through 2 decades of boomer anti-internet sentiments in about a year.
i mean the whole part about if they won’t work they don’t eat seems kind of important
From collecting nuts and berries, to viewing nuts and berries.
User deleted comment
1mo
The whole article is written like they're some uncontacted tribe suddenly subjected to the full force of modern society. The first picture in the article has the three men pictured wearing sunglasses, an Adidas cap, and prescription glasses
As is tradition
Maybe the Avenue Q wikipedia page wasn't the ideal startup site to give them.
I feel like this is giving cocaine to someone to someone who’s never even had a cup of coffee.
I’m sure they wonder why all around the ‘civilized world’, stepsisters keep getting their hands caught in these weird refrigerator things.. or dryers, or stuck in the rungs of a ladder
the internet is for porn.
Grab your D*ck and double click
for PORN PORN PORN.
Those that didn't know, the musical this was from was written by one half of the couple that wrote the songs for Frozen 😂
Princeton, I'm surprised at you!
When I sold cell phones, I occasionally would get people who obviously came from a more socially conservative part of the world, and they would have so many tabs on their phone open to pornhub. But like, didn't care I saw it.
I even had one ask me where to fine porn online.
“It changed the routine so much that it was detrimental,” he stated. “In the village, if you don’t hunt, fish and plant, you don’t eat.”
Just you wait until they discover DoorDash
This is why porn wont die out even they hooked up quick lmao
This is a terrible article, and it’s from a website owned by Rupert Murdoch. If you want a full picture of this story, I highly recommend you check out this NYT article. The news.com/au article paints this as a largely negative situation that members of the community don’t want to deal with. In actuality, internet access has come with a number of both pros and cons for this tribe.
News.com makes so many errors my favourite recent one was “a 40 year old woman in her thirties”
This is so depressing. Why can’t we just leave them be.
Maybe this is a dumb question, but what kind of porn is popular among them?