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What are the best ways to make a woman feel valued and cherished?
questionGive her random flowers, remind her how much you love her, tell ber how beautiful she is, communicate your feelings with her, be a safe place for her to be open, support her goals, predict what she might need your help with before she tells you and always take iniciative to solve conflicts no matter who was in the wrong.
He takes account of what I say and I always try to make sure his life is made easier if I can ❤ ❤
Express what she means to you and all the things she has changed in your life..easy as that
Show care in taking interest and care in what makes her feel valuable capable and alive. Cherish those pieces that make her whole and help her where you can bolster those tools skills or experiences that heighten her life. But minus the 'mansplaining" or taking control of her passions
Write her a letter of all the things that you love about her and why you are glad to have her. Buy her flowers just because (especially if she has a favorite) Plan date nights or have a movie night with all of her favorite snacks
User deleted comment
1mo
Thank you!
dude whats the picc
Do not, I repeat, do not in a slightly drunken conversation with your wife tell her "you're really decaying gracefully". It doesn't sound good and she won't let you forget it even 3 years later and counting.
The exception is if she's goth and neurospicy, then it's basically foreplay
Well, now you have to double down every time she brings it up. 💀
It sounds like you're talking from experience here
The biggest thing that has validated me from a man was his cheerleading of all the things I wanted to do with myself and my life. It was his belief in my power, his belief in my ability to be independent from him, and his absolute worship of my attraction. Not just physical attraction, emotional and spiritual too. I’m validated by powerful and confident men seeing the power and confidence in me and being unafraid to verbalise just how much, being unafraid to pursue me with full gumption. I’m validated and appreciated when I’m uplifted to be more and separately from the man I love. If this had lasted, I’d have never looked at another man again.
It is about finding the one that’s consistent in this though, who’s intentions are sincere. I think if that validation stops, that’s all you need to know that it’s over, that’s your sign to put your love elsewhere. I’ve come to believe the only way you do that is by making the jump with those that give you this energy, regardless of how it’s gonna work out. One day one of them will be the right one who never stops, and you have to have the strength to go through an unknown number of heartbreaks to find them.
Very well said, especially about not being afraid to verbalize how much they want you and the ability to just go for it.
Why, you keep them in a light house, as your little pet, of course!
To be somebody respected enough that when you tell them they’re special, they really believe it.
I think it’s sad that most of the comments first answer is make her feel safe. But it’s true.
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1mo
Being consistent is another good piece of advice.
Being present
keep the water warm for her hands <3
I’m a woman and these my few tips
- Make your woman feel secured around you
- Win 🏆 her trust and she will do her best for you
- Giver her the attention she needs
- Make sure you spend more time with her than anyone else
- Don’t choose your friends over her
- Surprise her 🎉
Do these few things and you win her. I wish I had man though 🥹💔
I am a woman and here are some tips:
- [ ] Providing a sense of psychological and emotional safety so she can relax in her feminine and open up around you.
- [ ] Attention is currency so pay her generously with your undivided attention, notice her little changes and make her feel fully seen.
- [ ] Active listening, it’s the sweetest thing when you remember little things she has mentioned.
- [ ] Hold space, when you are having conflicts or if she is just having a bad day and is sharing her frustration with you, learn how to hold space for her feelings and validate them.
- [ ] Show her off, be proud of your partner, celebrate her small wins, speak life and words of encouragement to her for her steps towards growth no matter how small.
- [ ] Put in effort, we all know that effort is sexy as hell, so whatever you do for her, put intentional effort in it, so when you compliment her, don’t just repeatedly tell her “you look beautiful” every time she is dressed up! get creative. learn from the ways her best friends compliment and gas her up.
[ ] if u see her as being your woman, talk about your future plans together and show excitement. stare into her eyes every once in a while and speak words of affirmation into her ears gently as your run your fingers through her hair.
[ ] remember that at the end of the day you need to learn about the ways your partner feels loved because everyone is different but this should give you a general idea.
Miss all these 😢💔
the universe will compensate! don’t give up on love ✨
I want every one of these so badly😩😭
and you deserve nothing less 🌹
Just gotta find the right person. But this is everything I’ve been wanting. Thank you for putting it into words🖤
I’m happy it resonates with you ♥️
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1mo
your welcome!
Are you trying to tell us something with that picture? (>◡<)
Do the house chores and take her to get pampered 👍
Definitelythe gREAT magic of listening!, under rated skill!!
The opposite of what you would expect
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1mo
It’s true, take all the advice in thread and do the exact opposite. Sad but true.
Idk what they mean. My advice is
make her feel safe above all else
make her feel respected, valued as an equal and an individual
read She Comes First (it’s about oral skills lol)
show her off
Find out what she likes and do those things
I am the woman SO, but some things that have made me feel appreciated and valued:
- my partner being willing to work through issues with me even when it’s hard
- my partner actively listening to me whether I am expressing concerns about our relationship or venting about life (makes me feel like they care about my thoughts and feelings)
- my partner doing things for me that make my life easier when it is tough (ex. we eat a nice dinner together because i’ve had a stressful day, giving a nice massage or something else that’s small) (shows they care about my well being and my feelings)
- little gifts (not necessary for me BUT definitely is cute) like a pin or a sticker because my partner thought i would like it/was thinking of me
- reminding me that they love me! :) (this one’s obvious but it really feels nice combined with their actions)
- being willing to engage in my interests/have conversations to learn more about me (shows interest and appreciation for what makes me unique as a person)
there’s more for SURE but these are ones off the top of my head!
Know what her love language is and follow that in everything you do.
To listen to her and validate her.
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1mo
Absolutely!
When she asks for the whole nine yards, you give her the whole nine yards
Lay siege to her enemies
Ask her. There is a book 18 languages for modern love and you go over each one and discuss if it makes you feel loved, if it’s how you show love, some examples and my fiancé and I made a night of it. Take out and glass of wine, it was quite nice.
And now he knows what actions he can take to make me feel loved, I know which make him feel loved; and when we are doing something that doesn’t feel like they’re showing love because it isn’t our particular love language but we’re able to recognize it as an act of love and appreciate it that much more.
Some things become so normal - example: I cook every night. Feeding my fiancé is how I show my love. But he would just as quickly grab fast food, a sandwich, or microwave something. He doesn’t care. He’s just hungry. And if anything, how long food takes me to cook can make him feel like I’m not recognizing his needs. But it’s how I show love. I don’t have to cook. We are both adults who can feed ourselves. But feeding him a good meal is how I show “I put love and care into how this thing tastes, I planned it out, went shopping, picked something he liked, put labor into it, served it to him on the couch, picked his plate up for him when he’s finished, put the food away, etc.” but he just saw it as dinner that was taking too long. After our discussion, he sees it’s how I show him affection. And he appreciated it, which in turn makes me feel more loved. And now, I do it less often. He’d much prefer I order something and snuggle on the couch with him instead. Which is how I also feel loved but my messaging as a child said “women do” and we perform love for our partners and men provide love for their partners. It’s old fashioned and now how I even rationally think. But I didn’t realize I was imposing this traditional role on myself because it’s what I was supposed to do, I guess. But now, I can save my energy for other ways he feels loved.
18 you say?
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1mo
That’s really all it takes. The want and the drive. Best of luck to you friend. The book is super cheap on kindle and you can find a free pdf online to download too if you look. I think the workbook gives lots of examples too. But this thread is also great.
don't question her😂
The answer is as effective as it is ambiguous.
Find unique ways to say "I love you" that are specific to her.
Knowing her love language is very useful here. My other half is very big on acts of service.
When she comes home to all the chores done, she gets weak in the knees. Doubly so when she's in ADD mode and is rattling off random project ideas, and a few days later one of those projects is done.
She leaves for work before me, sometimes when she's not looking I'll pre set the coffee machine and time it so there's a fresh pot waiting for her when she goes into the kitchen the next morning.
I wake up before her on the weekends, sometimes she'll wake up to breakfast and a glass of orange juice on her nightstand.
Those little subtle things that say "I'm listening" when she doesn't think I'm listening. Doing those very specific particulars she likes. Attention to detail is huge. The more niche, the better.
Don't give other women power over her. Don't give another woman attention, don't allow another woman to feel superior in any sense. Let her know she's the one and only, apple of your eye. Open doors for her, touch her when you walk past her, show her affection in public (holding her hand, arm around her, kissing her forehead, etc).
You don't need to make women feel valued, because they are not objects with a value.
To make them feel cherished, literally cheer them on lol how is it hard.
THANK you. ^ read this one ppl
In general, everyone must understand that "feeling worthless" is not healed by adding value...
This is why we still feel empty if we drive a Benz and do drugs y'all. (Not that I ever did either of these things)
Absolutely. Every person inherently has 'worth' as a human being (even if they're not great people) but we shouldn't even be viewing ourselves as worthy or unworthy bc it's silly. We're worth it to ourselves just like existing but other people's respect would be super nice.
Agree to disagree, in my perception every human being is a predatory animal and primordially evil. We are in fact so strong that we are on the verge of destroying our own species. This is why we need strategies to fulfill our needs without causing a world-wide destruction of life, which we are very well capable of.
Adding personal value to certain strategies for survival is just a insufficient amount of variables and in doing so we hurt the thinking of our offspring, which is also a bad way to address survival.
So I say no, nobody of us has any worth. There is no such thing as worth. It is a stand-in metaphor for acquiring useful things that arose with money and currency and is not complex enough to predict our lifestyles.
My suggestion is go to therapy... Jesus...
Oh definitely, but not because I refuse to play along in this silly game of "what is my value-level" and call people "a three" or whatever.
Actions over words Words are cute but that’s all
Caring and understanding We don’t always have to agree but don’t put me down Doing cheesy corny things React to all my reels lol
Do what you say you are going to do.
Have a consistent personality and never be fake.
Don't ever lie or tell half truths.
Don't interact unnecessarily with other women.
She is priority one. Don't make excuses.
Actions. Not words.
I love this thank you for the comment
Learn what she likes, anticipate her needs, and have everything ready for her
Compliments. I always tell her she's hot and sexy everytime she felt insecure about her body since she's on the chubby side.
Just show her you desire her, even in ways that aren’t sexual.
Have an opinion. Her opinion matters, of course, but always saying, “I don’t know,” “I don’t care,” “Whatever you want,” etc. just makes it feel like you don’t want to be there. Have an opinion. WANT to do things with her.
True!!, & depends on the context..
Kindness
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1mo
And you surprise how many are unkind to their woman
Actually fucking listen to your partner lol that's a good start. Every woman is different so... Literally ask them directly what makes them feel appreciated. It's that fucking simple. Women aren't a hive mind.
Actually fucking listen to your partner lol
babe i'm sorry i'll do better
Know their love-languages, do them. Know their greatest fears, don’t do them, prevent them at all cost. This goes both ways men and women.
I think it's as simple as talking especially if you're open and vulnerable for me if someone trusts in me there's nothing better. I love to think I'm the person this person wants to talk too.
Gift her a wheel of cheese
Ha ha this is so hilarious because a woman loves the simple stuff money of course and putting down the toilet seat and filling the ice cube trays and especially when we as men do the dishes and of course paying attention no matter what they say 🙏👑🌹😍❤️🔥💘❤️🔥🍀✌️
Keep crying in delulu land buddy
Know about her. What her true likes, interests, desires, goals, dreams are, but more importantly, how she takes her coffee, what her favorite book is, .... the little things. Having her back no matter what, valuing her opinion
Know about her. What her true likes, interests, desires, goals, dreams are, but more importantly, how she takes her coffee, what her favorite book is, .... the little things. Having her back no matter what, valuing her opinion
Know about her. What her true likes, interests, desires, goals, dreams are, but more importantly, how she takes her coffee, what her favorite book is, .... the little things.
Having her back no matter what, valuing her opinion.
Know about her. What her true likes, interests, desires, goals, dreams are, but more importantly, how she takes her coffee, what her favorite book is, .... the little things.
Having her back no matter what, valuing her opinion.
Look into her eyes. Every woman dreams about being desired, so set you mind solely on her, and forsake all others. She is a deep well and a mystery that will take an entire life to discover. Most women know that guys have seen porn, and being self conscious, feel like they are competing with other women and porn stars. Set your eyes only on her. After marrying the love of your life, keep reassuring her that she's the most beautiful creature on God's green earth. Love all of her stretch marks, battle scars, wrinkles and love handles. After almost 50 years, I'm still trying to convince my wife about how beautiful she is, even though she's self-conscious about her weight, but the pay off is that I get to see every square inch of her, including touching, kissing, licking, smelling and tasting her. My goal is to always send her to the moon in ecstasy, and it never grows old.
Your wife is a lucky woman
User deleted comment
1mo
any love advice for a high school teen?
I do, my advice is: don’t get too attached. It’s not very likely to last, you’re still immature at that age. I personally recommend waiting to try and find anything long term until your brain stops developing. That doesn’t happen until you’re 25. Not that it’s a bad idea to be dating or anything before then, you just need to make sure you’re focusing on yourself as well and figuring out EXACTLY who you want to be, love can wait.
Also, use protection for god’s sake.
yea this is real helpful tysm. imma jst go around hv sum fun and experience life yk what im saying but at the same time be aware of taking care of myself ig
Listen and pay attention. Make sure she knows she's heard when she's talking. My husband listens to me blabbering on about stupid stuff (I fully admit sometimes I talk just because of anxiety and nothing I say really matters) but he always listens and asks questions. He validates my feelings. If I'm having a bad day, he never has to ask if I am, he can tell, which isn't always easy to do I admit. He knows my little quirks. My favorite frosting for cupcakes. Which pillow I like to sleep with. What salsa is my favorite. He knows all these things and I've never told him.
This is so big for me. I really wish my boyfriend listened to me. I often feel unloved or disinteresting because I have to beg people to listen, or repeat myself.
Having my partner's attention would make me feel so, incredibly valued!
I'm still getting used to it after a couple years. My ex sucked with listening and caring, so this is a huge change for me. I honestly thought it was creepy at first, someone caring so much, until I realized that's how I felt about him too
I love this kind of love for you 🥰 enjoy it!
I'm assuming you've asked this question because you have a specific woman in mind that you wish to cherish. Learn that woman.
Get to know her likes and dislikes. What are her favourite flowers? What is her favourite colour? Favourite food? Does she prefer gold jewellery or silver? What's her favourite kind of jewellery? What are her hobbies? Is there any special equipment, merchandise, etc associated with her hobby? Does she like surprises or does she like being informed in advance of big changes? What is her favourite cake flavour? How toasted does she like her bread? What's her favourite shower/gel bodywash smell? What is the optimal shampoo type for her hair? What are her allergies? Are there any foods she can't stand? Are there certain fabrics that make her itchy? The list goes on and on. Learn everything you can about this special woman, and then use that information.
Example:
So she likes bread toasted plain with butter spread on top after toasting? She's trying to eat healthy? She hates cooked egg yolks? with these three pieces of information, you now know that you can make her avocado toast with an egg sunny side up and the yolk runny.
She hates surprises, her hobby is construction, and she needs a new set of power tools because her current set is rusting? Tell her you're buying her what she needs.
She likes holding something while going to sleep? Make yourself always available to her at bedtime so that she can hold your hand or cuddle with you or whatever it is that she wants.
Just learn as much about her as possible, and once you do, you'll realise all the ways you can combine all of this knowledge to make her happy and care for her.
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1mo
Nah this person needs more than a 5 word reply They deserve money
Basic things. Tell her she's pretty. Ask detailed things about her day. When she's stressed look at what you can do to help her out and do it. Most importantly, don't stick your genitals in any person that isn't her.
Everyone is different.
For me personally, talking for hours in engaged conversation makes me to feel appreciated and valued. Quality time is definitely my love language and without it, I don’t feel wanted or appreciated really at all. Long hugs also help and taking notes of little things and doing things I don’t like doing that you know need to get done.
I’d encompass all in ‘paying attention’: to her love language, the little things, what she says about her likes and dislikes, every woman is different so you would have to pay attention to her.
does she get happy when you buy her little things like candies? Or if you take her on a date randomly? Or when you both stay at home ? Does she prefer words, acts or both? You need to find out her love language and then you’ll know what to do
Dude there isn’t any set way.
I think you should ask your girlfriend how she likes men to express that. No easier way. Each woman is different.
In my opinion it's not hard to make a woman feel valued and cherished. Women want what everyone wants. For our existence to be acknowledged. To matter to someone that we love. To be treated w respect, and kindness. To be gifted w thoughtful expressions of love. For our value to be recognized.
It sounds silly but the quality time I spend with my partner means a lot to me.
We play games together, watch movies and shows, and we could talk about anything for hours.
I feel valued because despite being busy he always makes the time for me.
Make her feel safe, listened, taken into consideration (if you want to paint something belonging to the both of you, ask her opinion and say), respected, support her decisions in the best possible way, be on her side, and respect her boundaries.
Honestly. I love it when he remembers litte details. I mentioned how I preferred red bell peppers because I liked to bright vibrant color. As well as I mentioned I loved the vegan muffins from a local bakery. And he would get me a muffin when he would come bac from work and it's the small things.
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1mo
Remembering the smaller details of off comments stated by the other party makes them feel loved.
The concept of love languages has been debunked.
https://www.psychiatrist.com/news/study-refutes-concept-of-love-languages/
To make someone feel valued and cherished show love and affection to them. Do it in a variety of ways and learn what matters to them.
For quality time spend time doing a hobby that matters to them. If they like books read one of their favorite books and discuss it together. At least learn about some of their interests and hobbies so you can spend time talking to them about it in a knowledgeable way. Do chores such as cooking, getting groceries, and cleaning together. Talk to them while doing these things.
Learn about emotional intelligence, how to ask good questions to show you value what they have to say, and validate their thoughts and feelings without giving advice. Listen to make them feel heard and understood rather than to respond. Talk to entertain. When you share things about your life make it funny and enthralling. Every single day ask them how their day was and how they are. Genuinely listen to them with your full attention.
Hold space for your partner when they are having unpleasant emotions. Listen to them, paraphrase and repeat back what they say, tell them you hear them and what they are feeling makes sense and you care about them.
Give gifts on a regular basis. Gifts don't have to be buying something. It can be making their favorite meal or making their coffee. Buy them flowers multiple times each month. Buy them their favorite drink or treat every once in awhile. Buy simple things they use or like and gift wrap them. Leave them in strange places for them to find such as their purse or under their pillow. Buy something they will really appreciate and wrap it and put a note on it that they can't open it until a certain date. They may be excited every day they see it until they finally get to open it.
Send fun, flirty messages, and complimentary messages everyday. Write love messages on sticky notes and leave them in places such as their tooth rush, their coffee mug, the steering wheel of their car, or in their purse where they will find them later. Write how beautiful they are, how they make you feel, etc. Say things from your heart and use a variety of descriptors.
Show appreciation for something recent at least once every day and appreciation for something important in the past at least once per week. When you show appreciation specifically call it out. Give details about what they did that mattered to you and why.
Show physical affection multiple times per day in ways that they enjoy. Examples could be a hug that last 20 seconds, a light touch on their back as you walk by, and writing the alphabet on their back as you sit together on the couch. When sitting together give them a foot massage, back rub, or head scratch.
Say things or motion to them that you want their company. For example if you're gone all day and see them for the first time look really happy and excited when you see them and tell them you missed them. If you are sitting on the couch and they walk by motion to them to come sit by you by patting your hand on the empty seat. Give them a come hither motion while you are standing and give them a hug or a kiss when they come up to you.
this is perfect :)
I think when a man really listens to me and asks questions to find out more. When he delights in my eyes or my smile. When he does really sweet things like creative gestures. When he is vulnerable with me and trusts me. When he shows affection without it leading to sex. I love sex, but it’s nice when a man just makes it clear that they love being close to me even without sex. Just wanting time with me is really nice. Also if I have an issue, if they really listen to comprehend what the issue is. Like really try and figure out what I am saying and why I am stressed or upset. It’s just so loving. Protective and nurturing is nice too. If they get turned on by something unique about me or the way I say something… it’s just so endearing.
Learn her love language and speak it fluently and frequently.
User deleted comment
1mo
Tell her that you love and cherish her and then spend a lot of time with her. Learning her love language is the hard part. So you got that going for ya, which is nice.
User deleted comment
1mo
If you work on it, you'll most likely be successful. Too many folks never work on it.
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