Returning home after 1.5 years of traveling

Hey guys. I’ve talked to a few people about this but it’s hard to feel understood when most people haven’t had this personal experience.

I’m currently 22y/o, I took 1.5 years off of university to travel, and just over two months ago I returned to Boston to finish my degree (one full year left in Boston now). I lived a lot of dreams while I was away (trekking in Nepal, trekking skiing & climbing New Zealand, climbing India, etc)…

Readjusting to life here has been very up and down. I’ve been feeling insecure, very uncertain of what I want (short and long term), and at times despondent / without motivation to do things I know I love.

Reconnecting with old friends has been hard as many people have graduated from uni now, but more so that I don’t know many people that can relate to many of the experiences I’ve had, which makes it hard to form deeper more authentic friendships. This branches a bit beyond traveling, as I’m very into adventure sports (rock climbing/alpinism/backcountry stuff) and I don’t find that this community is easy to come by in Boston. Maybe I’m wrong / too close minded about it.

Anyway, has anyone had a similar experience returning from long-term travel? Things seem to have improved mentally from when I first returned, but I’m still feeling this way at least enough to post this. Any advice is helpful

EDIT: Thanks for all the advice. Sorry if this came off self interested.. Definitely didn’t intend to inflate my experiences as this is a travel subreddit so I figured it makes sense to ask in here about readjusting post-travel. I’ve just been struggling a bit so that’s more the point.. Nice to feel the solidarity. I’m just going to focus on creating more of a community around climbing and all that. It’s been hard because I’ve had a broken big toe since I got home so all that advice is great and true but thats the reason I haven’t been able to go as hard into the climbing community as I would’ve been. Anyway, thanks guys

in longtermtravelby travelclimbr

94%

3mo

JacobAldridge

3mo

Yup, been there and bought the t-shirt.

The main thing to appreciate is that nobody cares about your travels. No more than you care about their stories about the weekend trip to Costco or that one party when the chair leg broke. You might get away with a few highlight stories or a handful of photos, but like it or not your stories are irrelevant and boring.

Travek has changed you. Maybe not in a huge way, but in some ways. That doesn’t make you special - your friends will also have changed and had their experiences.

Maybe that doesn’t matter, but there’s also the reality that friends can grow and drift apart in your 20s and 30s. When we got back, our first friends had started popping out babies. Wow is that a different life! And it’s all fabulous and it’s all ok, as long as you don’t expect your hometown to have stood still waiting for your triumphant return.

travelclimbr

3mo

Yeah, it’s a hard pill to swallow after having a lot of profound life experiences out in the world. Especially when you don’t have anyone to share the coming back with. Returning to a community that functions the same way with or without you…It’s weird, and difficult. Part of life I guess.

JacobAldridge

3mo

It’s also pretty arrogant of us - who love and value travel - to presume people can’t have profound life experiences surrounded by what they value.

I discovered travel a little later than you did (didn’t go overseas until I was 26), but prior to that I’d had things like finding a career, buying my first home, getting married, learning how to invest, writing a book, hosting a tv show … lots of small town life, but all profound and transformative in their own way.

travelclimbr

3mo

Yeah I definitely have thought through this as well. It’s so easy to come off egotistical/undervaluing other life things while talking about traveling. It’s not that, it’s just different. I don’t understand most of that stuff yet, haven’t experienced it myself. But I definitely don’t disagree.

KeepingItSurreal

3mo

Don’t make traveling your personality. Like the other poster said, nobody cares about your travels and people that just tell travel stories are very boring. I think bc you’re still young you maybe feel like traveling was an intensely life changing experience and wish you could share it with the people you care about. And it definitely is, but it’s incredibly personal as well. You can’t expect other people to care deeply about your own personal experiences that are completely foreign to them.

You like adventure sports, maybe get more involved in that community? It’s not Yosemite but there’s still local crags to climb and mountains to backpack in New England.

travelclimbr

3mo

I feel like the desire to share an intensely life changing experience doesn’t really have to do with age. I don’t really feel a need to share travel stories , more like just a normal desire to connect with people who I feel are on a similar wavelength. Just finding that those people are a bit harder to find when your experiences are harder to relate to I suppose. Lends to just not talking about it.

& Yeah, I pretty much spend as much time in the mountains as much as I can out here. It’s really exhausting with the 5/2 schedule & all the driving up and back every weekend. I think that’s part of what’s made readjusting so hard- it’s difficult to fit everything in without being exhausted. I think that makes it more difficult mentally , but I have a tough time not going 100% on things

glittergal1206

3mo

Just returned from a 9 month adventure and also working hard to find my footing. I’ve been very gentle with myself as my brain just tries to remember how to do all the things that I do when I’m not traveling (cook, drive etc). I just have been thinking of it like I’m in a decompression chamber.

I’ve found that lots of sleep, many nature walks, and good nutrition/hydration are all helping. I’ve also been journaling to help integrate and make meaning.

Would love to hear other people’s thoughts!

travelclimbr

3mo

I’ve been trying to do something similar, just being a little gentle and allowing the ups and downs to occur. I journaled super consistently while I was traveling but I’ve struggled to keep the habit being back here in all the business. Thanks for these thoughts

glittergal1206

2mo

Just wanted to come back and say I’m still on the rollercoaster. The hardest thing is that I don’t want to talk only about travel (and no one around me wants that either, understandably) but also no one in my life has been through this before. Thanks for posting about your experience. Helped me feel less alone.

Supertouchy

2mo

You're not alone. Everyone feels like this when they get back. Like others have said, nobody cares to listen except maybe your grandmother. The truth is you have had experiences at a higher volume than people back home. There has to be at least one person you know that has traveled extensively that would enjoy talking about it. Now go grind it out at rat race until you like it slacker J/K, but yeah it is hard coming back down to Earth.

mangosta08

3mo

"I'm very into adventure sports (rock climbing/ alpinism/backcountry stuff) and don't find that this community is easy to come by in Boston."

I just finished a long stint in Boston to pursue my travel dreams! (And I literally, just a few minutes ago, finished the Langtang Valley Trek in Nepal, and have decided to retire from bipedal movement, thank you for your understanding.) I wasn't really active in any of these communities, but I promise you, they are there. I had a friend who was really active in MIT Outing Club (MITOC), they would do backcountry stuff all the time. Even if you're not unfortunate enough to go there, the website says anyone can join: https://mitoc.mit.edu/join . For climbing, Brooklyn Boulders is the go to, but pricey. Not sure what the budget option is. Just about the only thing the Facebook is still good for is finding local groups for things you're interested in.

Actually, your best bet is probably to ask about this on r/boston

travelclimbr

3mo

I’m in MITOC actually, I’ll make more time/effort to join them. I have a difficult time with doing things with organized groups (always have) not sure if it’s anxiety or i’m just not used to it. Lol. I have an industry membership to BBP so i go there once a week usually, it’s out of the way tho from where i live! been climbing a lot at CRG lately . Really good idea about r/boston though thank you. Appreciate the advice & have a great rest of your trip

Key-Somewhere-8227

3mo

Hey, I hope you had an amazing time abroad! What you experienced sounds really nice. We are quite similar, because I'm also into adventure sports and that's what I do as well while traveling.

I totally understand how you're feeling. I came back home two years ago from a two-years trip and it was pretty terrible for me. It's lonely, because the people at home (family, friends) don't understand what you just experienced and for them not much really changed. For me everything changed. They also never really cared and were totally indifferent how I changed while being abroad. It was such a strange feeling and even today it still feels wrong to me. I probably had some sort of reverse culture shock and I was just so bored, but also isoltated.

What I suggest you is to plan your future. Want to make traveling your life? Plan your next trip and save money to do it. Another thing that came to my mind is sports. I don't know if that could be something for you, but the ultramarathon/trailrunning scene is pretty dope. There's people all around the world training for these races and I've always perceived these people as being adventurous, openminded and fun. I wouldn't be surprised if you had people in Boston doing it as well.

glittergal1206

2mo

This really resonated. Thank you.