My exhusband ( we will cal Richard) and I have been divorced for 7 years. Our son is 8 (we will call him Ted). Richard left the state when Ted was a little over a year old. He blamed me for it. He moved in with his dad and couldn’t hold down a stable job. He saw Ted about 1-2 times a month. Around this time we agreed on child support being $480 a month.
I met my current husband (we will call him Roger) and we moved in together, Richard was barely in the picture at this point. So Roger put Ted on his medical insurance, while I wasn’t able to work.
About a year after that Richard tells me he reenlisted into the Army and is moving to Colorado. Then he filed for 50/50 custody of Ted, while he lived two states away.
After that we settled on a visitation schedule.
Now, end of summer/early fall he told me he was being moved to Georgia. So we’d have to figure out how to get Ted there and back. So we split it. But when Richard came to pick up Ted for winter break, Richard has his mom and her husband with him.
Well the next child support payment went down to $160. He didn’t say anything about it. He hasn’t talked to Ted in a couple of weeks.
I am putting Ted through tutoring for his reading because he does have adhd and Covid made him fall further behind. So now I pay $200 for tutoring. I’ve never asked Richard to help with that. Richard doesn’t even know what school Ted goes to because he is not in his life actively.
What do I do now?
***EDIT: We DO have a custody agreement through the courts. We settled it between two lawyers and mediation. When we did that it was acknowledged the his child support payments did not need to be modified, and he agreed. We have had an agreement since 2017, and was discussed during mediation.