I’m so lost

We work for money. The idea of "loving" a job is BS.

Decades later, I realize now that my 20s were a time of intense turmoil and struggle, both emotionally and financially. It is not easy finding a path. It's stressful.

The thing that motivated me was adopting a dog. I got one because I lived in a bad neighborhood and was robbed. But that dog ended up filling a huge hole in my life. Turned out he desperately needed stability and TLC.

Being responsible for keeping a roof over my dog's head, feeding him, and getting him medical care motivated me to work and earn as much money as I could. Boom, I was on my way. I bought my first house because it was hard to find rentals that allowed big dogs. The house ended up being an amazing investment.

My point is, at your age, I think life is a search for love. Work is just a practical activity that supports that search. Try to separate your emotions from work. Do it for the money, period. There are much more important things in life.

It’s good you’re taking the time to consider these topics and recognize you need to find a better path. Do you have a counsellor or therapist to work with on your depression? Everyone is different, of course, though I will share that in my experience it wasn’t until I started working on my own depression with a pro that I started to make actual progress instead of just applying metaphorical band-aids.

The challenge with simple living is less getting to the simplicity and more about accepting that you will be going counter to the dominant culture. Who you relate to may change, and where you want to live may change.

What will help most is having a clear vision of what you want and why.

I was talking with my mentor the other day (I am 41M, he is 64M), and we were discussing the idea of “Freedom From” vs “Freedom To”. Freedom From is the kind of freedoms that comes from pushing away from something you don’t like - say modern commodified culture. Freedom To is about being a position where you can more directly exercise your will and time TOWARDS something you want.

Many people manage Freedom From - save enough money and you can stop working, for example.

It’s harder to get Freedom To. I am working on it, but for me it’s about finding ways to help people better connect with the natural world around them. My day job doesn’t do that, but it helps me work towards my financial goals. But knowing what I want to do and why it matters to me gives me greater freedom to do the stuff I want. I have time to volunteer locally, or head out on trails with my dog, and to sit on a Board of Directors for a non-profit.

It sounds like you have a sense of what you enjoy, so see how you can build your life around that. Don’t put yourself in a financial hole to do it, but if you don’t already, maybe consider moving closer to parks or forests or whatever outdoor space appeals to you most.

My mentor likes to approach life as a series of 3-5 year adventures. I am working to do the same. Maybe see how you feel setting some short and mid-term goals rather than thinking about decades in a job.

You can find the life you want.

I agree soooooo much. Switching to a 3x12 hour job helped so much— I’m already exhausted on work days anyway, might as well be exhausted only three days a week and have so much freedom left! It makes the corporate slavery more tolerable.

I have been exactly where your. For me, SSRIs were the answer. I'm a different person now (the "normal" me). I dont know if that is right for you, but what I CAN tell you is that until you address the mental health aspect, you will make little to no progress on the rest of it.

source: lived it.

Hoping for an event in the future to be the magical solution for all current ails is usually a self delusion tactic. If writing or nature walks are what you want to do when you retire, do as much of that as you can right now. Writing, of all things, is something you can work into your life today - you wrote this post, you have time.

If you have no joy now, bad news, retirement will bring its own problems that'll keep you unhappy. Don't wait for retirement, aim for ideal lifestyle while working. As your net worth/passive income grows, cut down on work and put in time towards the things you want to do with your life. The difference is between waiting decades or years.

With all that my friend, best of luck, don't give up. Magical things can happen today.

You sir, have been born in the wrong century. But there is still a world out there outside of the big cities and stressful digital media where you have to live up to. There is no dream job. It's just an illusion we like to believe in that gives us hope. In the old days, we just worked. Whatever the available job was. Now there are too many options, one gets lost. Go back to the basics. Enjoy small things in life, like nature. Don't stress about work. It's not worth it. Life is just too short to overthink itself.

The world economy is currently structured in a specific way to benefit a specific personality type. The fact that you do not fit perfectly into that personality type is fine, and I think you need to hear that.

If we were all still naked in tribal camps 15,000 years ago, you would probably be blissfully happy. Daily walks through the woods with your buds, pick some tasty berries, murder some animals, go home and boink your partner. For many, it's the perfect life (until you die at age 28).

That being said, the world is what it is. Get a job, get a career, build your skills, earn more money... And hoard it. Retire early. Then go for daily walks, write, and live in the countryside.

We're pulling for you, OP.

Just a little tough love because you remind me of myself at your age: unfortunately, the world works the way it does, and your best bet is to find a way to work within that suits you. This means you're going to need a full-time job (unless there are part-time jobs out there that require little experience but pay very well that I'm not aware of. Real estate? I don't know.) to support yourself. It's just a fact, and if working 40 hours a week scares you, you need to deal with that - or find a way to support yourself with much, much less.

It's hard when you're young and an idealist, but if you don't start to address these issues now, it's only going to get more difficult as time goes on. Working is an unfortunate part of life that most people don't enjoy, but we do it because we have to; it's part of being an adult. So, if you get started now and work hard and save, you can hopefully achieve your goal of "not working" a little farther down the line as many of the posters on this sub are doing.

Again, I say this from experience as someone who struggled for a very long time with my idealism and all-consuming daydreams of a utopia. Not working is just not a reality for most of us, and you need to accept it and make your own "real" life for yourself.

As others have said, the idea of a dream job is bullshit for the majority of people and is merely a bill of goods sold to us to keep us working. Find something that aligns with your natural skill set so you're not constantly struggling to get the job done - and it'll just make it more tolerable. All that said, I'd suggest starting with a therapist. Good luck.

When it comes to this whole dream job bs… it is bs cuz I turned my hobby into a well paying career but now it’s not fun as it used to be and I’m so over it by the time I’m done with work that hobby no longer interests me.

That’s the draw of leanFIRE.. or just FIRE in general. I’m tired of extracting income and economic value from my interest. I just want to do it and not for a check. It is exhausting.

settle for a crappy job which will make me miserable

This isn't true. No, we can't necessarily work at a "dream job", but we can look at trying to get a job that incorporates some of the things we like most, and avoids the things we hate.

A friend of mine just got a job that involves train schedules (rail analyst). He has loved trains since he was a small child, and is part of groups of rail fans, spent hours building layouts, created track simulation software, etc. He has always wanted this kind of job, but spent 25 years as a computer operator, to pay the bills. Due to his extensive knowledge of train-related info, he easily passed the tests and interviews.

What jumped out at me in your post was how you spoke of a desire to "walk around nature." That made me think of forestry jobs that you could consider: https://www.fs.usda.gov/working-with-us/jobs

There are also plenty of jobs at parks, gardens, zoos, etc. Again, these are outdoors, as opposed to sitting in cubicle staring at a screen all day amid constantly ringing phones.

You may have to get training to do a job that you enjoy. There are free online courses that you can take: https://www.mooc.org/

I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. These are all such wonderful comments. I’m not sure if you went to college, but I remember for the few years after college, myself and all my friends were deeply depressed and I realized it was part of coming into adulthood and seeing all that time stretch out in front of you. It’s overwhelming. In other words, the first 1-3 years after college sucks and nobody one warns you. I dealt with it by moving to the other side of the world, which worked out great for me (and my career). Unfortunately we live in capitalism and we need to find ways to make the system work for our particular personalities and energy levels. It takes time. I wish the best for you and hope you can take lots of nice outdoor walks wherever you are. Never let go of wonder.

I feel like society has its ways of convincing people that everybody has a dream job

Aren’t we supposed to do something we love?

These are tied together and are mostly bullshit. The real truth is that the vast majority of people work because they have to. If you're lucky, you'll find a job you don't hate. If you're REALLY lucky, you'll find a job you actually like. This constant messaging of 'you must love your job in order to have fulfilling life' is a load of shit that just results in people feeling like losers who aren't really figuring things out while everyone around them is blissfully happy and thriving. Adults would do kids a huge favor if they stopped spreading this - and other fairy tale - story and taught kids about reality.

I have absolutely no dream job, or even a job I’m remotely interested in.

​

I’ve accepted that I’ll settle for a crappy job which will make me miserable.

Not to say this in an insulting way, but you know nothing. You are young, and have probably pretty much never worked a real job. There are literally tens of thousands of different types of jobs and different types of work out there, and you probably don't even know about 95% of them. And even for that 5% that you know exist, you lack the ability to evaluate if you might find that work engaging, interesting, or rewarding, because you've never done it.

But that's ok. Celebrate your ignorance and instead look at this as an opportunity to try different jobs and different types of work, to see what might interest you. Thinking that you already know the answer to these questions just reinforces that you don't know anything about what you are talking about.

Next, realize that work is a means to an end. There are 168 hours in a week. 40 of those should be spent working and 56 sleeping, so that leave 72 to go spend doing what you are passionate about. Work is how you pay for the things you want to do during that 72 hours. So that also means that the more money you make during work, the more options you have during your free time. So, if you're going to work anyway, try to make as much money as you can during that time in order give you the most options on how to spend your 72 hours.

I think this is fairly common. I feel very much the same way. Like I was built for a society totally different from this one. Which in a way, we all were. We evolved to be tribal hunter gatherers, surrounded by family, close to nature, working to survive and help our communities. But the world is do radically different from that now. I think that's the root cause of a lot of mental illnesses honestly. We're maladapted to this world because we literally never adapted.

Anyway try to make your life now look like it will after retirement. Find a way to do the things you want to do, and try to think of work as a small part of your life.

im 38, engineer, making 150k, saved 630k. never had passion in anything, never had dream job, never wanted a dream job.

around age 15 i realized all this dream job and passion is all fake. so i got a high paying job and never regretted it.

many young people fall this fake "follow ur passion" bs. dont belive it

The first thing I would say is that you're far from alone with what you're talking about. Finding a job that you can be passionate about doesn't guarantee that you will continue to feel that way. I'm British, and people go into nursing to help others. One I know says bad things about how the management work. That's most jobs. Do people who love photography really still love it when they're endlessly photographing other people's weddings and their is massive pressure to get good shots?

I'd deal with the depression separately if you think that's what it might be, and then try to find a way to earn money that you can tolerate. Bear in mind that people can get by on half of an average salary, so you already have the choice of living simply and working half as much as others do. That's not a bad start. Work a year saving 50% of your earnings and you have one year of living expenses saved up. Maybe you could just work intensively for part of each year. There are options.

Do some temp work. Change your assignment each day. And you don't have to work every day. Find some work in the outdoors.

I know, its depression and there's help for that.

The guy who wrote Walden basically lived of the charity of others, even while in a cabin in the woods.

just lost my job at UPS today. Your not alone. I have hiked 8000 miles over 3 years across America three times. loved it. now im broke

It took me YEARS to realize I didn’t have a dream job, and that I don’t want a career. Sadly I’d already attended grad school and borrowed money to do so. Now I gotta dig myself outta that hole.

Stay away from debt, keep your expenses low, and go live your life however the hell you want. Maybe after a couple years of that you’ll be ready for a change of pace. Or maybe you won’t. Put together enough money to allow you to “walk around nature and write stuff” for a few months, then go do it. You might be surprised at the opportunities you get while doing it, maybe you’re wandering around a national park and they need someone to be a tour guide or something, and you find that you really enjoy it, I don’t know. Point is, you’re young, and you can go off and do this without any really severe consequences. If you were married and had kids, it’d be a different story.

Lots of life deferrers in this comment section…

I get that that’s the point of FIRE to some extent but fucking hell don’t work yourself to death in your most active and healthy years in search of a pot of gold.

Op, I’m in a relatively similar position. This is what I’ve done to make myself feel less overwhelmed: 1. Define what I need to live on (£1200pcm) 2. Work out what work I need to do in order to achieve that amount of money 3. Ensure lifestyle remains low cost but enjoyable - high cost lifestyles likely mean spending more time doing unhappy work 4. DONT SAVE IT ALL FOR THE END- go walk through nature and enjoy yourself for now, just because some people fetishise extreme hard work for ten - forty years for some weird form of golden retirement doesn’t mean you have to. You like being outside? Good get a job that involves being outside - park ranger, postman, fuckin dog walker, go and study to become someone who works outside (geologist, biologist etc).

Yes you have to do some work and that’s not fun but if your lifestyle is cheap then you’re minimising the amount of unhappy work you have to do. Ideally though do a job that generates you sufficient income for small hours and allows you to spend time in nature. It’s not unachievable it just feels that way.

Here to talk if you need someone to speak to dude :)

You have to embrace the idea that not 100% of your time in life will be leisure. Find a job related to a hobby work at a place where you enjoy the company of your coworkers and boss. You dont sound depressed you sound lazy and upset that you cant do whatever you want 24/7! Just my two cents. Learn to work.

"Find something you love and you'll never work a day in your life" 100% bullshit. It will make you slowly hate the thing you once loved

I find myself in basically the same boat, and the conclusion I've come to is I'm going to be annoyed about needing to work (my mood on this ranges from annoyed to despondent) always. It's never going to go away. So I might as well spend this time trying to get to FI as quickly as possible. It's easier to deal with if you have a plan, and it's within a relatively fast number of years. If you can look at the data and go, at this rate I can retire in X years, how can I improve upon that? You'll feel a lot better with a plan of action. So here's what I mean in terms of actions:

1. I sit down every month and review my finances. I have an excel spreadsheet where I track everything I made, everything I spent, and the difference between those two figures. It's helpful to see the raw data. You can look at it and go okay I saved 30% of my pay this month, but I could save 40% once the credit card is paid off... And on and on, and knowing that if I cut my grocery bill by 30% I could retire 8 years earlier makes it really motivating to hit those figures and try to improve.

2. I read Mr money mustache, it really changed my perspective on what can be accomplished just through smart savings and modest income increases. And it really helps with mindset. It's good to be reminded not everyone even has the luxury of having a boring job.

....that's pretty much it. Other than achieving this goal, the only other things important to me are my health, my family, and my sanity. So if working more hours would negatively impact one of those categories, I choose not to. I make time for cooking, exercise, spending time with loved ones, therapy, and recharging when I need it. Other than that I'm blazing towards the end post because I do not want to waste another second of my life on meaningless drudgery than I absolutely have to.

Also therapy man, it's so underrated, it's really worked wonders for me.

I hope that's at least somewhat helpful info. Good luck on your journey.

write stuff

Lots of people make a living doing that.

Have you thought of working seasonally? There are many jobs that don't necessarily pay great, but they provide lodging and food, so you can save your money and then live off your savings for 4 to 6 months, traveling or doing whatever you want. If you are single and have no pets, this could give you a good lifestyle. Hey, I get it. Work sucks. I think most of us on this sub agree. But it doesn't have to be miserable, and you don't have to slave away for the next 30 years before you can live a simple, retired lifestyle.

I feel for you.., we all been there. I had similar thoughts at your age.

This my advice for whatever it’s worth: You need to do something.. anything That’s life .. the adventure The adventure IS the goal (Like the book, the alchemist) My brother was like you.. never could find his path. Then picked a path.. nursing (He had a college degree so he completed the courses online) Now mind you my brother is alpha as they come.. 240lb 6 ft body builder type He completed his nursing degree.. started working and then moved to Florida There were a lot of naysayers questioning his choice. But he followed the path. He now makes his own money and bought a home (cash) in a cheap area on a water way He could buy cash because he lived extremely frugally. He still has moments of depression but with his work got a therapist to talk out his feelings

I’m not saying become a nurse... but pick something reasonable and stick with it.. sometimes pursuing the goal brings joy.

You’re in your twenties. Average life span now a days is about 80. Stop wasting time stressing about what path you will take or you’ll look back one day with regrets. Do what you need to survive, find a job with people you enjoy being around at the very least. Start investing. Do the things that you enjoy doing with the people you enjoy being with as much as possible and try new things out. You’ll find your way through trial and error. That’s how we learn our entire life but once we’re out of school most of us tend to stop trying new things and live in a comfort zone. You got a lot of life ahead of you so make the most of it starting now.

Honestly most people don't do jobs they love. They do jobs they are decent at and stumble on.

Soon as I let go of the idea of a dream job I became much happier. The anxiety of finding a dream job and getting it right was terrible

hey brother i have been in same situation freedom of time is good but freedom of time to boredom is not good i used to do to jobs morning and night loved everything about it lots of money was coming in my brain was finding all kind or ideas to grow that money, invest etc.but then i lost 1 of my job and got another dead end job with that my depression started after doing that job for 1.5yrs i went to the same situation coming home doing nothing but just sleeping, lost track of eating etc.

suggestion i will give you

- listen to podcasts or successful people talk, cook eat shower read and walk everyday does not matter how bad you feel you fucking move your ass this kinda attitude you need, try to talk to people, and journal a plan everyday how to get out of this rut. no reddit no internet you have the answers good luck.

I'd love to do those things and not work but have accepted that the reality for me is working ~15-20 years and then being able to break free. It's not ideal but I also see that maybe it's a good thing that I have to work for a simple life. I have to contribute to society, like time served, and then my time is mine. And with age comes a broader appreciation, and more enjoyment, out of little things. Don't see a job as something to prevent you from enjoying the little things. See it as the doorway to real freedom.

Keep your head up bro, I've been there. you just gotta claw your way out and I know it's hard but nothing in life worth having is easy. Even freedom

I’ve told this to people before and its gotten nothing but negative comments. Listen to Allen Watts lectures about the pursuit of pleasure. It should alleviate some of the stress you are feeling.

Link: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pKvSFOB3zIE

Find something that interests you and will allow you to earn a living.

The "advantage" of being depressed and not finding joy in anything is that you have no incentive on spending money on non-necessities, which means that you will save a lot more money and reach your leanFIRE goals earlier.

Is that a good thing? It's worked for me.

OP, I feel you pretty hard on this one.

I started my career with a decade of running my own business - all that narrative about "be your own boss and do your dream thing and you'll never work blah blah blah." While it was fun, it was also incredibly stressful. I worked super hard and although I liked doing it, I made almost no money and had frustratingly little to show for it at the end.

I looked into building a log cabin (or even an underground house) and living super frugally, both for satisfaction and also to save towards FIRE. Though it's not impossible, it's so much more expensive than people suggest. This was also frustrating.

At the end of the day:

(1) Ignore the people who say you're supposed to find purpose and satisfaction in working. Most people don't, and the pressure makes it feel worse. Instead, acknowledge to yourself whatever your level of wants are (food, shelter, but what more?) and be super honest with yourself about the level of luxury (or lack thereof) that works for you. Don't be afraid to run experiments in frugality and going without, if needed. Accept that you want things, and this means you'll offer something in return - but NOT a lifetime of servitude.

(2) Once you do that, acknowledge to yourself that you'll need to do SOME amount of exchanging your time for those things, but again acknowledge that you are NOT someone signing up for 40hrs/wk until age 65. This is going to be a balancing act, in search of a sweet spot. Yes, you will have to do SOME amount of work, but not in the way that the cult of productivity tells you. They don't understand FIRE. You do.

(3) At this point, you make another choice: you find SOMEthing that pays you enough to work towards leanFIRE, while not robbing you of your soul in the process. You don't have to love it, but you shouldn't find it completely awful. It will be an acceptable short term exchange: you give some of your energy (but not all, because it's just a job and not your life) for a limited length of time, and you get those things you decided you want, along with building the leanFIRE portfolio. Maybe you can find a 3x12 or a 4x10 shift that feels less crushing than 5x8. Maybe you can find some other flexible arrangement that isn't so bad - again, for the SHORT TERM. Not a lifetime. That's not the story you're writing.

Maybe you can find a series of contract positions. Maybe you'll find a role you can ride out for a couple years. This IS doable - you CAN build a FIRE portfolio without taking decades, and without hating every day of it. You could even build in some midway goals like working towards CoastFIRE and then stepping down your working activity level. Maybe you can househack to accelerate your savings rate. Look for ways to minimize the downside while you maximize the gain.

It may not feel like it right now, but you are the one who gets to write this story. It might not be 100% your ideal, but it won't be the opposite of that either. You're ahead of the game because you're asking these questions NOW and you're looking into leanFIRE. You know WHY this is important to you - you just have to put together the last pieces. Find the income path of least resistance (and obligation, and duration) and build that portfolio, fast!

I too find no redeeming qualities in work.

You either need to think of something really creative and fun to get money or accept the grind. Life is just unfair. I don't like it either. It's also not as black and white as you say, you grind one crappy job until you find the next slightly better job and who knows, you might actually find something decent eventually.

Learn about imagination and the creative power of humans. It's in your mind, not in reality that you need to be in a treadmill to live fully.

Can I just say… being in your early 20’s sucks so much more than anyone is willing to admit. Congrats to everyone who got their “dream job” out of college, but most people (including me) feel exactly like you do.

Good for you for recognizing the wrongs and not just blindly and numbly accepting it all. Not sure where you are in your financial journey, but it takes time to adjust, time to feel stable and find a job that is less soul sucking. They really do exist, just gotta be willing to shop around for one.

I’ve found it helpful to stop thinking longterm for anything outside of saving. I’m no longer thinking about the 40 more years of work I have to do, I’m spending my time planning dumb podcasts with friends, learning a new language, honing my kitchen skills. Force yourself into hobbies, something that lets you plan and see measurable growth. Not a cure-all, but it you do enough of it and you can lift a bit of the depression off your shoulders.

My advice might be dumb, but the point is that you’re not alone at least in how you feel.

I don’t have any answers but I want you to know that I am literally in the exact same place. I’m 26 and I’ve been working since I was 19. I hate all kinds of labor where I work for someone else and I only tolerate working because I know I need money to survive. Just wanted to let you know I struggle with the same feelings, also have depression and this is one of the biggest things that depresses me about life. I turned to lean fire to coach me though keeping my expenses low while trying to look forward to a better tomorrow, if there is one.

Hi, I feel the same. I have no answers

I think it’s a largely accepted fact that all jobs suck. That’s why you get paid.

See work as a game for u to play, some levels are difficult and some easy. Commin home after long working day is a blessing. The ”on” time make u appreciate the ”off” time. The vally create the peaks, and boy is it nice to visit the peaks. Life is up and down, thats what makes it fun. Some day the party end, for all of us, but until then enjoy the party. I think Im somewhere midparty but who knows. Listen to ”baz luhrman - wear sunscreen” some really great life advice there.

This is just like me! I'm 23 and only get enjoyment from nature. Working in a sector I'm interested in (Investment) but generally feel miserable at work due to the culture.

I feel so calm in nature and have been feeling depressed for ages because it's all I want. Like I want to FIRE now and just walk in forests all day.

Where I grew up there are a good number of people who end up retiring on "disability"....they have various reasons...bad back, ptsd, alcohol dependancy, ect...

So I guess if you can get a dr and maybe a lawyer then get this disability approved...presto you are leanfired.

Not advocating this but I have witnessed this my whole life...they dont call it RE...just "getting a check" and it is with all ages 20s to 50s

There are 24 hours in a day and work usually takes 10 hours. Lets say you sleep for 8 hours, then you are left with 6 hours. 6 hours is plenty of time to enjoy your day to do your hobbies, unwind, and be happy and do those things you listed. And to be real, that 10 hours of work is usually 4 hours of real work.

My advice for you is to be proactive and do things that make you happy throughout your day now. And keep yourself active. Activity helps with depression a lot.

It's interesting that you claim to have no ideal job, and then say that you like to spend time in nature and write. Have you considered trying to make money as a writer?

One common mistake among young people is assuming that a job is something you do for the benefit of someone else for 40 or more hours per week. Anything can be a job. You can make money as a park ranger or trail guide and make money spending time in nature. You can be a freelance writer or start a blog. If you have any other creative outlets, you can make a living off those too.

Dream jobs do exist, for everyone. People just don't always know how to profit off their passions. Sounds like its a good time for you to learn.

I'm sorry to be blunt but I've seen these types of posts before and always find them incredibly self-indulgent and naive.

It isn't 'society' that forces you to work its the laws of nature. As human beings we have needs such as food, shelter, safety etc which we must provide for. This may sound anachronistic in the modern developed world but millions of people live this basic survival reality on a daily basis

There are only two ways to accomplish this, through your own work or having others provide such for you.

Since your ideal world involves you not working because it doesn't "energise" you I presume it involves others working to satisfy your needs.

You figured this out earlier, I figured this out later. My dream is to NOT work at all- Ever! I recently left a good paying job after years of education.

10 For even when we were with you, we would give you this command: If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat.

2 Thessalonians 3:10

Something else is missing. Living like a perpetual adult man-child will not fix everything. And then, at the end, you die, like we all do. You need Jesus the Savior, the truth.

Cut all cost down to the essentials, food/shelter invest rest into crypto thank me in 5-10 years and pursue this shit.

Alan Watts said something relevant: "if you say that getting money is important, you'll spend your life completely wasting your time. Doing things you don't like doing, in order to go on living, that is to continue doing things you don't like doing." Life is just doing things you don't like doing at this point.

I had and still have a similar dilemma to you. I decided to do things I don't like doing in order to retire with 300k in 7 years. But I admit it is a waste of my life. Who knows if I'll even survive that long.

Watts' solution is to just do what you enjoy and there will be some profit to come of it eventually. If you like riding horses, be an instructor, etc...

Here's the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khOaAHK7efc

Edit: also want to add that I have a job that lets me do a lot of what I like doing bacause i have a lot of free time. So it's not a complete waste of time.

meaningful job > dream job

Become a park ranger.

Park Ranger? Tour Guide? Wildfire Suppression? Just a few job suggestions off the top of my head.

There are many communal living communities in the US that are not cults and might be an idea. Doesn't mean that you have to stay for life.

Go to therapy. Get medicated if you need some extra help.

Give “Walden on Wheels” a read. The guy lives in a van and cuts his expenses to the bone. He got a job as a park ranger in the wilderness which allowed him to work outdoors while also saving a ton of money.

Find something you can somewhat enjoy that adds value to others or the world, avoid the corporate and academic worlds and engage with something meaningful. And don’t do it under the rigid guidelines of a “job” or a “career” Simply just start by getting involved with things you’re interested in and find other people in that space, you’ll be surprised of what comes of it

TLDR:
Make decisions you're least likely going to regret, 40yrs from now.
Pursue meditation, go volunteer at an ashram maybe
Make bold decisions, do NOT conform to the status quo
Take it slow and enjoy the journey, no pressure
Don't label your thoughts as positive or negative nor take them too seriously, they are fleeting every moment just like clouds.

First off, I've been in the same boat as you are for about 10yrs now (29y/o) and there is nothing wrong with your thoughts. It's normal to feel this way, it's a search for meaning in a meaningless existence. And that's a good spot to be in. Don't go trying to fix this problem right here and now.20s seems like the time when it hits. This is when you have all the freedom and all the possibilities flash in front of your eyes and it's difficult to take a "right" step.

So how do you know what's the right step?Do the things that you're going to least regret 40yrs from now. Start from the end. When you're on your death bed what do you want people to say about you or feel about you.Be that person.

What if you don't care about society or what other people think or say?Then maybe pursue meditation, the practice of just being who you are.Take time to sit with your thoughts and see them come and go.Where are these thoughts originating from?Who is the thinker? Just stick to the source of experience.Are YOU the one experiencing this world? But who are YOU? Body? Mind? Soul?The world is more mysterious than you think. Don't label your thoughts as depressive, positive or negative. Stop judging yourself, stop judging nature and all the creation around. Just be one with it. Don't try to want to be yourself, BE YOURSELF.

Save and invest in etfS to live of dividends by 30 you could retire if you put the effort now.

I've had the same feeling from time to time. Got lucky (or unlucky?) that I had very well paying jobs that significantly increased my NW so I am on a good path, but had horrible mental health effects on me. Currently taking a break (I call it a sabatical) while I decide what to do next. Thinking of doing some kind of simple job where I don't need to think and CoastFIRE or something.

Eat some shrooms.

Have you checked out r/simpleliving

Strong Campbell Interest Inventory = amazing for finding a job fit for you that you will enjoy. I have taken it a few times to guide my choices.

I do believe there are jobs we love. I love building up companies & making lives better.

I don’t see how that would mean retirement is better or worse though. Some folks struggle when they retire.

Anyway - try the Myers Brigg combo with Strong Campbell if you want some extra context.

I also put myself in the right mindset before taking the “inventory” / test.. pick any job or task I lover that I naturally got attention for & did well. Answer all questions in that mindset.

I’d encourage you to consider finding a therapist. And don’t jsit go to anyone. Read about types of therapy a bit and maybe try a few to see who your feel very heard by. They can be so very helpful. I wish you the best of luck.

You might like to come to r/simpleliving 👍

Define "dream job".

I absolutely love what I do. It took me years to end up here, and it can be stressful as well, but I'd go back to school tomorrow to do it if I had to. Granted, what I do (healthcare) isn't for everyone, but nothing else in life really is either. I think you have to ask yourself what is important to you in life .. what makes you feel good (ie. being in nature, helping people, solving problems, giving back to your community, etc.), and then find a niche that checks a couple of your boxes and pays well.

Nothing is free, and you have to work hard to rise up. This is a given.

Look up communes. You still have to work, but less depending on which one you join

You can already live (and work) today in a small village or a rural area. You just have to life with the (mostly low paying) jobs that are available in that area to you. Like farmer, ranger etc.

I’m sorry to hear about your depression.

When I was in my early 20’s in college, I was pretty depressed. Not suicidal, but hopeless. Depression is a bitch because it not only drained me of energy, but also positive outlook on life.

So here I was, in college, studying..but for what? I had no idea what to do. But my depression kept getting in the way of any progress I had made.

So the first step, and I see that you’re acknowledging it, is to self introspect. It’s to really open your eyes to the fact that depression has taken away your will to thrive. This is the first step, but one of the most important. You are not alone in this.

The next step is to ask for help or seek professional help. I’d recommend the latter but it’s definitely a financial investment. This one is solely on you. I hate to say that because when you’re depressed, you want someone to reach out to you. But you are the only one that can really dig yourself out.

Next, go outside. Go for walks, listening to music, cry, smile, scream into the sky. Let yourself experience what it’s like to be an innocent kid again, experiencing the world through rose colored glasses. Seriously, this is essential/mandatory. You need a way to express yourself, since depression likes to hold that part back. The best way to fight that mentality is to literally tell it to fuck off through expression.

Next, give yourself time and slack. Some only experience it for a month or two, others experience depression their whole lives. Everyone’s life is different. Don’t compare yourself to others, because in the end, it all comes down to you.

My best advice would just be to do. Do something, start the engine and get out there. I did a lot of jobs I didn’t like in order to find the one that I do. I didn’t know what I wanted to do, but I just kept doing, and learning from each e pertinence.

Most importantly, just do. Go out and do something. The absolute worst you can do for yourself is self pity and stay inside. Trust me, you’ll either learn this now or learn this when you get worse. It’s the ultimate eventuality. Everybody comes to this point because sometimes it takes hitting rock bottom to come back. That’s what it took me

Hi OP, I don't have any advice for you but I'm wondering how you are doing now, 3 years later?

I find myself in the same position as you. Depressed, tired, and lost. I feel like all I want is to live a simple, stress free life, but work causes me so much stress due to many mental health issues, I would just love to stop.

Have things improved for you? Do you have any advice you can share to others now?