Howard started off the show saying he was up at 3am and is exhausted. Howard said he goes to bed early (8pm-9pm) but has to get up to pee a lot.. Howard is now worried because he read a study that said a lack of sleep is the main reason people die young.
Howard then talked about how jealous he is of Tom Morrello’s son who is an excellent guitar player at 13. Howard wishes he could have learned guitar as a kid but he had a horrible dad who never gave him encouragement or threw the baseball with him. Howard said Tom Morello must be a great dad. Howard said his dad should never have had kids, he was just a horrible father in Howard’s opinion.
Next Howard talked about playing the guitar (picking) watching guitar videos and talked to Nowicki and Fred about guitar riffs. Howard actually played a little guitar on air, swing low sweet chariot.
Howard then talked about how he hates being photographed and is worried about Beth taking a ton of pictures in Italy. Howard said he makes Jason get on a ladder whenever a guest wants to take a picture with Howard and Howard has to be sitting down and looking to the left.
Next Howard talked about trying on outfits, shoes and hats for his Italy trip. Howard actually said he has a hat like Imus for his Italy trip.
Howard said Eddie Vedder gave him a special guitar and then someone called in to say he’s been to 200 Pearl Jam concerts and how incredible Pearl Jam is, which triggered more Eddie Vedder, Pearl Jam discussion.
Next was more talk about Baby Alien. Howard watched a Baby Alien porn and said his penis looks like a long green bean (long and very skinny). Howard said the girl who was blowing him was hot. Howard said Beth asked him what he was watching and then Beth said she wanted to see the Baby Alien porn. Beth then asked Howard if guys jack off to this.
Ex porn star Vic Lagina called in to discuss Baby Alien and promote his book. Vic said porn became too vanilla so now it’s gone to all freak show stuff like Baby Alien.
Wilding comes into the studio and complains how bad the staff’s taste in music is, because Gary and some other staffers have now started a music league.
Gina in Las Vegas called in (she had a heavy NYC accent) and said there is no way Ronnie likes living in Las Vegas because its too hot in the summer. Howard said Ronnie will never admit it’s too hot in Vegas even though it’s over 100 degrees almost every day in the summer. Howard said he leaves Florida in the summer (to his Hamptons house) because it’s too hot in Florida.
Ronnie then said he would rather live in Vegas than New York because NYC is a shithole and you can get bashed on the head with a brick just riding the subway now. Howard then called Ronnie anti New York and doesn’t understand why Ronnie doesn’t like New York anymore because that’s where he made all his money.
Howard claims he goes into NYC, Manhattan a lot because all the best doctors in the world are there.
Perelman and Blitt busted Ronnie’s balls and did a segment with Ronnie as a bingo caller.
Blitt and JD are going to Paris in late July and Howard is worried JD is out of shape and won’t be able to walk the town.
Next Howard talked about Dave Grohl, Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce. Howard said Kelce is huge and that’s what must turn Taylor on, that’s she literally getting swept off her feet by a quote unquote monster.
Howard then talked about a Vietnam Vet who told everyone he was gay in his will (but never told anyone he was gay when he was alive). Howard said that shows you how hard it is to come out especially with all the crazy right wingers out there.
This Vietnam Gay Vet talk sparked Howard into his stolen valor Vietnam act where Howard talked about how many gooks he killed and then fucked because he was a gay solder who fought in Vietnam. Howard claimed he won the Purple Heart and Red Buttucks award in Vietnam.
Howard ended the show saying he thought it was crazy that Trump wants Biden drug tested, that of course Biden does not use cocaine and even if he did it would hurt Biden more than help him in the debate.
Howard ended the show telling a caller he would not watch the debate because he’s already made up his mind and wouldn’t understand it even if he did watch it.