You made cookie, so just make another.
Just need a big ol' glass of milk to dunk it. This is a good problem to have.
Bucket o milk
She did it all for the cookie
but you made COOKIE! EVEN BETTER FOR HIS BIRTHDAY! 🎉
You didn’t fail, you just made one amazing cookie!
No it also doesn’t taste good hahaha but thank you
How did they taste?
Subpar to be honest
For me this is the perfect excuse to make more cookies.
Oh hell nah I hate baking haha
Lol baking is just tasty science.
Your positivity is amazing and you have cheered me up thank you random Redditor.
thanks randomname anonymous numbered Redditor!
The enrichement center has now started cooking testing. In these testing tracks, lives are NOT at play. The enrichement center wishes best of luck in cooking. Good testing!
On this matter, I'd still love to find a book that actually explains the science of baking and cooking. Like, what happens when you lower or raise the temperature. Why do you add which ingredient, which part of it actually matters and how can you exchange them for other ingredients to which effect (especially also for the times when I have vegan guests).
I do in fact own a very interesting book on the science of cooking but it lacks in the baking department and also only gives only limited advice about switching ingredients.
I am surprised that this type of household chemistry isn't more systematically published.
Alton Brown had an episode of Good Eats that covered this kind of thing for chocolate chip cookies specifically. It talks about what happens when you change the amount of baking soda, white vs brown sugar, etc.
The recipes for the cookies can be found here, but I also suggest watching the episode because it's pretty funny and I enjoy being taught cookie recipes by a knock-off Muppet.
I've seen many books like that! here's a thread regarding good cookbooks that teach the science of baking.
Good Eats. Alton Brown explains food chemistry and it's fascinating and entertaining.
Baking is science
It's essentially edible chemistry.
“Here, I hate baked some weird looking gross tasting cookies for your birthday”
"Honey, my birthday is 2 months from now"
User deleted comment
1.8y
I LOVE Sally's recipes!!
Prolly why they taste bad. Gotta be made with love.
Cake box cookies! It looks like you may have either out in too much salt or baking powder. Using a box mix stops mistakes like that from happening because it’s already measured out that stuff for you. You put in 30% of the effort you would of actually making it from scratch but still maintain 100% of that satisfaction feeling. It’s the perfect effort to satisfaction ratio.
White cake, cranberries and pecon. Or chocolate cake ,walnuts and peanut butter chips.
To be fair, for someone who hates baking, to have gone to so much trouble, means the world. It does not matter (so much) how they look or taste, it's the thought and effort that counts. Your husband is one lucky guy.
Thank you! That’s so nice
You must be madly in love then.
I am! He’s the light of my life
No offense but it shows
Add ice cream and or whip cream
If it still tastes bad just have you with whip cream and or ice cream. Your husband will be happy with that birthday cake
So you essentially just made a Mrs Field Cookie Cake.
Just spread some Nutella on it, top it with some ice cream, and it's better than a cake
Still a cookie tho
Honestly the shape just makes it better
=(
Add ice cream
Came here to say the same. Ice cream and whipped cream will make anything better.
In that case, it's modern art. Probably be worth millions if Tracey Emin made it.
Lol! I like that
Put it in a block of clear epoxy to preserve it and you can start a subreddit like that hotdog guy /r/epoxyhotdog/
I made cookies once. The sugar was still on the counter after they went into the oven. They were barely edible.
I like how this implies that you ate them anyway! 😂
I’ve done that with blueberry loaf before! It smelled so delicious and looked so sexy and tasted like an Amazon package. Apparently sugar is ONLY there for the flavor. I’ve also accidentally made a huge cookie before, but it was because I doubled all the ingredients of a recipe but one. I think it was the flour.
Frosting. Did you try a generous helping of frosting?
Also, just in case he tells you that he likes the taste, I am totally positive I would like the taste. It doesn't have to be totally crazy dolce de leche to taste good.
My mom would eat anything we made as kids and say "it's no so bad if you put whipped cream on it"
Honestly if you took 30,000-year-old steppe bison and added a little frosting, it's a cookie to me!
Fusion cooking needs to chill 😂
Thanks. I didn’t hate it, I just didn’t love it
Yeah but did he love it? I know we are all our own worst critics, but don't disbelieve him if he tells you he likes it.
Honestly, he may really like it!
He hasn’t had it yet since he’s out of town. It’s in the freezer now. But he’ll love it. Or at least very convincingly claim to
Well I love it. So when he tells you that he loves it, you should at least believe him. He's telling the truth. It's believably delicious
I love crumbly cookies. I was a little bit joking about the frosting, because too much frosting can be quite honestly too much. And crumbly cookies are the best. But some people are all about standard cookies with frosting. But those cookies you picture, look pretty damn good to me. I would literally nibble him like a mouse
Nom nom nom nom
Looks good to me 👍 but if you wanted to up it you could put a cake tin, cut a circle and make a single layer vanilla ice cream cookie 🤓
give some to the neighborhood stoner or some kid, their reaction will tell you truth
hey don't feel bad. I'm a chef and I still fail with cookies every once in a while. pastries and such are soo annoying cause you either follow the recipe 100% or get disaster results. :(
Behold! The super cookie.
To much low temperature melting fat. To little baking powder or baking soda. Not chilling the dough before baking. Temperature on oven to low. Not sure which one it is.
Wow you’re good. It was all of them except the oven heat I think lol! In my defense I was out of baking soda and the internet said I could use baking powder if I used triple the amount. It did not work
Baking soda and baking powder are very specific ingredients and are not interchangeable.
Baking soda is an alkaline that reacts with acid in your batter to make it rise.
Baking powder is both an acid and an alkaline held in suspension until it hit a high enough temperature then they connect and raise the cookie.
Baking soda is used if you have too much acid in the batter so it equals it out so the baking powder can do its job.
Without the baking soda the alkaline from the baking powder would react right away and be wasted because the dough isn't cooked enough to hold a rise.
Why did the internet lie to me
Can you link me to the site that told you that?
Ah, I see where you went wrong, baking advice from a fitness site.
I think every sweet/dessert dish I've ever tried from health & fitness sites has been at best disappointing.
Understandably I guess, it's a bit counterintuitive to their purpose.
No, no, makes sense that a fitness site would leave you with a subpar dessert or sweet. If it tastes meh, you'll eat less of it, or toss it, which is healthier than wanting more. Fitness!
Fitness cookie in my mouth!
“And for these Fitness Cookies, we just add 2 cups of salt!”
OK now may I see the recipe u used and did u do as they said and leave out any acidic ingredients?
yeah here it is. I didn’t let it sit in the fridge so I blew it on that one. Other than that I think I followed the directions. And I omitted the salt
The recipe you used is literally the toll house cookie recipe. The recipe is sound so it's not the recipe that's the problem.
Look at your gluten free flour and see if u see xanthan gum, guar gum, or psyllium husk. They are binders which are necessary for the gluten free cookies to rise.
The baking powder should have worked so that's not the issue. If you used real butter then you must chill the dough thoroughly. Let me know what you find out.
And go buy some baking soda lol. Also with new recipes always bake one or two cookies alone first so you can see how they act that way you can adjust before you bake the whole batch.
I did actually buy baking soda for this recipe but I lost it! I have no idea where it is. I didn’t chill them first and I should’ve
Are you a baking guru of some kind?
User deleted comment
1.8y
You shouldn’t omit salt. All cookie recipes call for it for two reasons, the small amount of salt enhances the flavor, and helps balance out the sweetness and it also helps cookies to be a bit more chewy. Don’t omit the salt!
Omitting the salt is another mistake, it seems like a small amount but the salt is important for the chemical reactions. If you leave the salt out, it won't bake properly
Baking is not cooking! Don't alter the recipe unless you know what it will do
Never omit salt in baking
Ive also read that you can replace one with the other by adding more but not the other way around. Never tried it though
If you want to try it I'd do it in two parts. First I'd add half of the baking powder in to the wet ingredients. Then the other half in to the dry ingredients. Mix the wet ingredients thoroughly and leave them for a few minutes to allow the alkaline portion of the baking powder to react to the acid in the wet ingredients. Then proceed as normal. This would prevent all of the alkaline portions of the baking powder from being damaged before it gets in the oven.
The reason this works is because the sodium bicarbonate is the same in both products. So that acts the same in both. The ingredient that is different is powdered acid that needs heat and moisture to react so it won't react in the wet ingredients only the sodium bicarbonate will.
Please let me know if this is to long winded. I can cut it down if needed.
Do you really think someone would do that? Just go on the internet and tell lies?
Certainly not. It's unthinkable.
What do you mean by too much acid in the batter? From what source? Baking soda darkens crumb and reacts more slowly so it's more suited to dark and/or dense cakes. Baking powder is baking soda with acid phosphate added to speed up the reaction for lighter coloured crumb, a more open texture and faster baking at a higher temperature.
Oh, in that case, the bad taste they had were probably baking powder related. It always produces a distinctive taste if overused.
Did you also happen to put the cookies in while the oven was heating?
Every one of your "to" should be "too", fyi.
what's funny is in one of their other comments they use "too" properly
It's too* not "to".
Make ice cream sandwiches out of them.
GIANT MEGA COOKIE LORD
Op made C O O K I E
First step complete! You just need cookie cutter shapes and a rubber plumbers mallet now.
Hey babe I made C O O K I E
My mom actually used to make giant cookies using a pizza pan and it was always epic ngl.
Store in my hometown would make and decorate giant pizza pan-sized cookies. Got those regularly for birthdays.
I’d crumble it over ice cream. Looks yummy
That’s a good idea, thanks!
I'd cut it into rectangles & make ice cream sammiches!
secretive paltry pen fly teeny consist airport crown pot lunchroom
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
Not gonna lie if my wife made those cookies I'd walk in and say "Sweet, the souls of the damned. Just what I wanted." Then grab a cookie and leave.
In this case youll grab the whole tray
You see souls of the dammed. I see a family of melted pandas. Either way, they’re edible
Then grab a cookie and leave.
You can't. You can only grab the cookie.
Looks delicious. You could cut them in rectangular shapes, then they’re cookie bars.
I think I see a few Labradors in there
If you're terribly upset about it, please feel free to mail it to me
Lol aww thank you! But if I send it to you, how will I get to watch my husband try it and say “dude this is actually so good! Its really good!” when we both know it’s mediocre at best? Lol But he’ll really sell that performance and I’ll half believe it.
Husband: tastes cookie.
Says: "This is amazing."
Smiles.
Thinks: "She's trying to poison me."
You know, I have this ongoing story in my head that my wife's been trying to poison me for years because she listens to too many true crime podcasts, and I can be annoying. However, I've spent decades eating the dumbest shit, like spinach from a rusty can, so my body just laughs at the poison and diarrheas it out.
my body just laughs at the poison
Sounds like you're a few steps ahead of her.
I'd still check her search history for "untraceable poisons". /s
You two sound like a lovely pair
Ahh, the Pangea cookie, nice.
Maybe cut them into squares, fill the center with jet puff marshmallow filling, room temp ice cream sandwich?
Hunny, did I ever tell you you're a good cook?
No
Then why do you keep trying?
lol! ouch
Saw from your comments there was a baking soda/baking powered mixup here, but for next time: try making a giant cookie and then putting a big scoop of vanilla ice cream on it. Eat with forks straight out of the pan while it’s hot.
It’s the greatest dessert I’ve ever eaten
Should note that big cookie is usually baked in a cast iron, not a sheet. Just for anyone who plans to try it lol
This is great if he says he is allowing himself to only eat one cookie at a time! 😆
Trust me he would appreciate the effort
User deleted comment
1.8y
Chocolate chip :( I don’t know if it’s because I used this special diet flour (I’m on an elimination diet thing rn and I wanted to eat them too) or because I used baking power instead of baking soda. The internet said I could if I tripled the amount! The test determined that was a lie.
The lack of flour is the problem. The baking powder might contribute a little to the issue but the main problem is the flour. I make so many chocolate chip cookies I can tell you they turn out flat like this if you don’t use enough flour. If you go the other way and use too much flour the cookies will be more puffy and bready. It could also be that your butter, which I’m assuming you melted, was too hot.
I don't think using baking powder instead of soda would have made the difference.
Baking soda produces a leavening reaction when exposed to acid + water. Baking powder is about 1/3 baking soda, 1/3 acid salt, and 1/3 cornstarch to prevent them from reacting until water is added. Baking powder therefore only needs water to produce a leavening reaction.
If you had used baking soda in place of baking powder, and there wasn't enough acid in the recipe, it might fall flat. But adding 3x the amount of baking soda is adding the same amount of baking powder (plus some other stuff). The acid may slightly affect the final taste, but it shouldn't prevent the baking soda from producing the desired reaction.
No, I think the much more likely culprit is the special diet flour. Flour is a major constituent of cookies, and changing it out has the potential to make a big effect on the texture.
The baking powder thing may also be part of the reason why OP also said they didn't taste great - assuming the special flour doesn't have a widely varying flavour.
Gluten free flour? Ok so remember baking is 99% science and 1% luck…if you CAN have regular flour msg me and I’ll send over three amazing recipes :) for choc. chip, cocoa choc. chip, and oatmeal raisin spice. Yummmmm!
Thank you, but I bought the special flour because I’m on an elimination diet right now to figure out what causes my digestion issues, so I can’t have regular flour
Gluten actually provided the structure in baked goods, so subbing gluten-free flours can have this effect. All the large “holes” you see in a sourdough bread are actually due to gluten being strong enough to trap expanding gas! Like a ballon. You essentially need a different element to replace the structure, like whipping egg whites before folding in the flour (a la macarons), or adding another binder like xanthum gum.
Ohhh got it!! I’m sorry! I didn’t really understand. Well I hope you are better soon and get it figured out 👽
baking power instead of baking soda.
This.
Yeah I had my suspicions when I saw the monstrosity in the oven
They all look like dogs faces, so I think it's a win 🐶
It looks like Munch’s The Scream having a family reunion
That's a COOKIE MONSTER
I tried to make my husband cookies for his birthday :(
I made my husband a cookie for his birthday :)
FTFY.
I'd be happy someone made me a cookie slab
Husband here (of a different wife). My wife and son made me cookies for Father’s Day that turned out just like this. I can assure you they probably still taste awesome and he won’t care one bit about their appearance. Your gesture will be appreciated 😃
Those might look ugly but I bet they are yummy. Looks like a nice crunchy outer edge with a nice chewy middle.
Cut them into squares and make cookie sammiches out of them with ice cream of frosting or something in the middle.
Thank you! They actually aren’t very good either haha. But the ice cream is a good idea!
I'm sure they're tasty!
But it looks like the doughy souls of the damned are escaping from your stove.
You did though, one giant cookie. Spell his name in icing and shove a candle in the middle, and you're good to go 🙂
its the thought that counts, i dont even know how to turn my oven on. hopefully you guys had a great time!
Trim it up to be a bit more square, get some sweetened condensed milk, pour it evenly across the cookie, sprinkle it with shredded coconut, add some butterscotch chips, let cool, serve as magic cookie bars.
I'd the hell out of...those? That? Whatever; looks delicious.
Just call them Pangea Cookies and you're good to go.
Cookie sheetcake!
This is haunting its like a bunch of muffled screams coming from the depths of hell.
You didn't make him cookies, true, but you did make him COOKIE!
He is a lucky man, bless you
nice smores
Actually, they look a lot like a pastry we have here called a “chocolatine” which is just a little croissant surrounding a huge brick of chocolate. Assuming you used sweet or semi-sweet chips and some sweetener in the dough, a little ice cream, heavy cream, icing sugar.... The sky’s the limit. Do it up like a parfait in a tall glass. Fragments of that layered with ice cream, chocolate drizzle, yogurt, strawberry jam... Go wild.
Bailey’s Irish Cream....if you want to make it a more adult treat.
Ummmmm. This looks amazing lol
Lol don't worry, intention is what counts!XD
But i bet he will love and eat it anyway. I know i would.:3
They're bars now. Still awesome!
Just cut them with a cookie cutter and voila
Its not Cookies, just a Cook
There isn't much more endearing to me than my wife's cooking or baking fails
cookie slab
bottom text
i'd eat this cookie slab if im being honest
A take whatever size you want cookie? He is a lucky man.
Task failed successfully.
Looks like soul sand in Minecraft
I’d use the oven next time
Oh. You made a new snack. You can call it Turtle Shell.
Thats a practice if I ever saw one
Am I the only one who originally saw a bunch of random brown fragments and thought those were the cookies on top of parchment paper? I almost asked if OP had ever seen cookies before but then I realized my error. One giant cookie is kinda fun. I say win, except it sounds like it tasted bad.
No way he will mind at all. Wish my other half would make me cookies and to end up with one cookie he can break into ‘man size’ portions is perfect lol.
It counts as 1 cookie now
That's ONE good looking cookie!
Those chocolate chips be the size of planets
Hahaha it was chunks of a chocolate bar. But they definitely didn’t look that big before!
Ice cream hides all sins.
Those do look delicious just cut them up in a square shape and there ya have it square shape coooookieee
It works for me.
A solid A- for effort 👌
Yumm🍪
ČØÖKÌÊ
Did you refrigerate the dough for at least an hour before putting them in the oven? It can help so the dough won't spread too much.
As a potential husband. They look good enough to eat!
You know I'll have more fun eating this
Spread some whipped cream on top and claim cookie cake
On the upside… you made a beautiful piece of abstract art!
I’d still call it a success. All depends on the taste tho
Husband: this all for me? thanks! one big cookie!
Well that's one down!
Don’t worry, he’ll have something nice to say. They always do!
Pretty sure it's delicious anyway!
I’m sure the thought and effort was very appreciated!
Yo those look fucking delicious
Well for one you should cook them in the oven instead of on top lol
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