I'm 37F, and my husband is 44M. We've been married for 15 years. Ok, snoring probably seems like a minor thing, and it really should be. Tons of people snore. The majority of people find ways to deal with their partner snoring. My husband, however, is very picky about his sleeping environment.

He always has to sleep with the TV on with a movie of his choosing (usually some cheesy horror movie which means lots of sudden volume changes) and the animals have to be shut out of the room. I tend to go to bed before him. I typically fall asleep in a dark, quiet room with the cats free to cuddle with me. I never make complaints when he comes into the room, chases the cats out, turns on the tv (which wakes me up) and climbs into bed.

Here's where things get complicated. We both snore. If I manage to fall back asleep first and my snoring keeps him awake he will kick me to wake me up so that he can sleep. If he kicks me enough times I will have to either keep myself awake until he can fall asleep or go to sleep on the couch. He believes this is fair because I'm the one making it difficult for him to sleep. However if his snoring ever makes it difficult for me to sleep, he thinks it would be inconsiderate of me to wake him as he has "difficulty sleeping". I personally have never felt comfortable waking anyone to force them to move if they're sleeping. I believe if you are the one struggling to sleep it is on you to find a solution, but I worry that might be a selfish perspective which is why I go along with adjusting my sleep habits to help my husband get more sleep whenever possible.

To add a little context he sleeps almost 12 hours on his days off. He does have sleep apnea and uses a cpap which would be the only reason I can see for him not wanting to leave the bed. I know his sleep isn't always restful due to apnea and restless leg syndrome. However I have a brain disease called IIH that doesn't allow me to lay flat so I also have to move some bulky equipment to be able to sleep on the couch, as well as severe chronic pain that flares when I sleep on the couch. My dr has been significantly concerned about my lack of sleep lately as it is effecting my condition. I'm not sure what to do here.

UPDATE

Wow! I didn't expect this to blow up nearly as fast as it did. I just got a chance to read all the comments since I posted it, and I'm in shock. I'm going to address some of the most common comments/questions real quick.

1- I recognize now how bad this situation is. Some of you correctly pointed out that I do have problems with people pleasing and being a doormat. It is something I am working on. That said, while it is something I am working on, I can assure you my husband is not abusive. In fact during our waking hours he typically is the first to tell me when I am people pleasing, even when I'm doing so for him, and embolden me to speak up for what I want. We struggle at times like every couple does, neither of us are perfect, but he is an amazing father and supportive partner when it counts. We work through our issue, and I have hope we can work through this. I just needed some extra brains to help me approach is as I am tired, grumpy, and struggling with brain fog.
2- Some people have asked why these issues weren't sorted out a long time ago. While the TV and the pets were something that was sorted out early on, waking me due to snoring is a recent issue. I've always snored but it didn't used to bother him. It became an issue in more recent years. Probably about the same time he began sleeping more significant hours which is why I recommended he get his sleep checked in the first place.
3- I do believe in this situation he is being inconsiderate. I'm going to have a conversation with him about what's been happening and see if we can come up with a solution. I'm not sure we have a current space for a separate bed, but I'm going to suggest it and see if we can come up with something with a little brainstorming. Our house is only 950 sq ft, we're in the master, our daughter has 1 bedroom, and the only other space we could put a bed is a shared office where we both work from home.
4- For those asking, I am scheduled for a sleep study in about a month.

Thank you