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My wife can’t stand the smell of coffee, so every morning I take the grinder onto my porch to be quiet, make my coffee, flush the grounds down the disposal, fabreeze the coffee counter, and then chew mints afterwards to hide the smell.
At this point I just feel like I’m having an affair.
Hey I just had to get some work done because I was flushing coffee down the disposal. It’s actually good for plants though, in small doses.
Great advice, I used to just poor the grounds in the garbage but she couldn’t stand the lingering smell, might try dusting it around our outdoor plants.
In want to repeat and stress their comment. DO NOT put grounds down the sink
I guess I really am just an asshole renter :/
In case you haven't heard, you really shouldn't put grounds down the sink.
What are you my landlord?
Yes. Rent is due. Don’t forget the tip.
I’m doing just the tip this time.
User deleted comment
13d
Yeah, with coffee. AND WE’RE HERE FOR IT (Sounds hot 🥵)
The best part of coffee is the smell.
Generally, especially ground coffee, but for some reason sometimes it hits me by surprise and it smells like cat piss, then it slowly reverts to coffee smell. Super weird.
I love the smell and hate the taste so it all works out in the end lol
I personally love it, but to each their own.
Plumber here, don’t put coffee grounds down the disposal. It’ll clog your kitchen and you’ll need to pay for someone to come snake it out.
I love it just for the ritual of it all. It takes a lot of effort to go to that extreme, but in my opinion the reward of the coffee is so much more. Plus you have a quiet moment of action that you do every day which I think is quite healthy for you.
Don't think about it in a negative light. You're 007 and in order to be the best spy on the mission of blending into regular life, you must consume coffee to keep your wits about you. Make a game out of it and just enjoy yourself. You're not sinning but being respectful. So it takes extra attention and care to do so. Bringing awareness to things like that is one of the best things you can do for your wellbeing and ease.
I don’t really think of it negatively, just one of those things to try and make somebody else’s life livable while being able to enjoy things I like too. I just think of it as a tiny compromise.
I did quite similar things with cocaine haha. Good old addictions!
Yaay im not alone \o/ the smell of coffee makes me nauseous 😫
And between coffee and a bear?
Coffee. No balls
What's the point of coffee if it doesn't have balls in it?!
Good answer 💪😎
Uuummm, I'd like to order a coffee. Hold the balls, please
Ok would you also like that with tits or no tits?
I wanna hear what would the coffee choose
It depends is the bear my bf
This is like the lowest tier joke I can think of, very boomery
I feel like it’s marginally funnier without the last panel.
Thanks, appreciate the feedback
I need the more fleshed out story of what led to this ultimatum
She really, really loves coffee 😞
Nah, we all agree with the choice. The question is what strange series of events led to her boyfriend demanding that she choose between him and coffee?
I’m assuming it makes her poop her pants all day long.
What her coffee order?
It’s lattes all day
Those better be some at homemade lattes or sheesh $$$
Half the time, yeh
Sadly doesn't love her boyfriend tho
Sadly? No loss there lol
I mean I don't know your story or the characters your portraying but choosing any drug over your so is kinda a dick move, no?
Sorry not meaning to cause offense etc
None taken. Its just a silly comic so nothing serious to think of it.
Making your partner choose between coffee or themselves is kind of a dick move
choosing any drug over your so is kinda a dick move, no?
Eh... I'm a software engineer. I could be dating my dream girl and I'd still pick caffeine over her in an (accelerated) heartbeat. Caffeine addiction is a requirement to function in my line of work.
As a fan of coffee and way too much coffee stuff in my home, I totally get it.
This is so unfunny it undid my laughter from the last time I heard a joke
But bacon is love, bacon is life! I-I mean coffee!
That perfectly describes it, like the most vanilla Facebook humor. Nothing overtly wrong with it, just a specific taste that’s not mine.
This is basically an f7u12 rage comic from 2010 with different art
Yeah most of the comics in this subreddit are not that funny ngl. It's all just mildly amusing observations instead of actually funny jokes. I only subbed for the art.
Yeah idk it felt like waiting for the joke and then the comic was already over
The joke is "I'm addicted to caffeine".
I don’t know how this sub gets upvotes. Truly pathetic content.
It’s so millennial
Moderator removed comment
13d
Idk if this comic even meets the definition for containing a joke.
Ah yes, chosing addiction over a relationship
It’s a cute art style, but the joke falls a little flat for me because I feel it’s been done so much. The classic “coffee is love, coffee is life” thing was huge with the millennial crowd and I don’t feel like this adds anything fresh. You’ve had some pretty good comics though, this one just isn’t my cuppa joe
It's close to our generation's version of "I hate my wife/kids/both" comics.
Boomers did "I hate my wife" millenials are doing "I hate my bf / husband"
Both are cringe
That being said, bf in this comic made his partner choose. As soon as someone in my life would do the same, that person is out.
I’m glad someone said it, the art is nice but the coffee joke is stale
For me the joke falls completely flat cuz there is no punchline, there is nothing funny actually happening, there’s no conflict, no subversion of expectations. It’s not a joke, it’s a statement: “gf pick coffee over bf.” That’s it. Pick this or that and she picks one.
It’d be way more funny if instead it was for example like “BABE BABE PLS THESE ALIENS KIDNAPPED ME AND THEY SAY THEYRE GONNA PROBE ME AND TAKE ME AWAY FOREVER IF YOU DON’T IMMEDIATELY STOP DRINKING COFFEE
cuts to her sweating profusely
babe?
cuts to her nervously drinking at starbucks
Fair, fair. To be fair to me, im a millennial 😭
Hi just a bit of constructive criticism -
The comic works far better without the final frame. The punchline is funnier as a visual gag of her drinking the coffee.
That’s a good note. Thanks 😊
Of all the jokes from the bargain bin at Target 10 years ago, this is my favorite
Damn LOLOLOL
Haha, addiction propaganda goes brrr
Not even, though. I'm a caffeine addict, it's sometimes really inconvenient (as addiction tends to be), but there are like 5 popular, socially acceptable sources of caffeine. "Coffee uber alles" means it's something even more obsessive than caffeine addiction.
Fuck me this is unfunny
No no you don’t understand. My addiction is funny
it's funny because she chose the coffee hahaha
That's literally a Wife Bad™ boomer comic, gen z edition.
What a weak punchline.
You know what would have made this comic funny? If she chose her boyfriend, but it turnes out he's an anthropomorphic cup of coffee, and vanishes right before her eyes.
Haha! Coffee good amirite everyone!??? LOL.
Wow such a plot twist!! Never saw it coming!! Kudos.
Oh my god 😭 millennial himour
Millenial humour
If I had an SO and they made an ultimatum like that for me, I'd also pick the latter ngl
Plus few things beat a good cup of Coffee in the morning
Same. It‘s not even about the coffee, it’s the fact that they’re even making these ultimatums in the first place over something so inconsequential. Seems very controlling.
For real though, anyone who makes an ultimatum like "it's me or X" (where X is anything other than a credible romantic rival), the correct choice is almost always X. 🚩🚩🚩
It's me or the meth.
Your SO will take the meth no matter how great and attractive you are.
Your SO will take the meth no matter how great and attractive you are.
As a coffee fan, I can totally see a coffee hobby getting in the way of a relationship. But that goes for almost any hobby that one can fall down the proverbial rabbit hole.
I agree. I have a hobby of speed solving rubiks cubes and my cousins and friends who aren't close to me think that I speedcube for most the day, whereas it's like 1.5 hr on avg and 3 hrs at the most
where X is anything other than a credible romantic rival
Even then, you should just challenge him to a dual like a real gentleman.
I mean, if someone is addicted it could be an issue. Caffeine can wreak havoc on your body if consumed in large amounts.
The problem I see with ultimatums is that most things can be solved by reaching a middle ground, like if they're spending too much on coffee, or if they're consuming it so much it's affecting their health, maybe they can drink it less often without straight up cutting it off their diet. To go "Either things go entirely my way or it's over" shows you yourself can't compromise, and that's not good. If it really gets to the point where you truly can't stand it and can't see any middle solution, you need to be very gentle when delivering that as a concern you have that you hope BOTH of you can work on, not a power play. It's very easy for that kind of ultimatum to be issued as a controlling threat, and I would instantly leave someone who tried to use that kind of coercion on me.
I don't really think a "credible romantic rival" is an exception to be honest? I suppose you would have to define what a "credible" romantic rival even is, but I have seen far too many people demanding their SO cuts good friends off simply because of a jealous fit, completely and utterly convinced there was something going on when there wasn't.
When I was a teen, my bf at the time gave me an ultimatum between him or my best friend, I picked my best friend because he wasn’t the one to give the ultimatum, don’t regret it at all. We’ve been friends for 9 years now. A couple years after the breakup we got back to talking, and so I’m also on great terms with the ex too, all 3 of us are good friends nowadays. I’d say I’m pretty lucky it ended as well as it did, I knows theres a lot of bad “ultimatum ex/bf/gf” stories.
Unfortunately, it's typically already the red flags in the other person driving somebody to make the ultimatum. They see repetitive and toxic behaviors, or just simply a repeating action that's a pet peeve. If you're spending $20/day on Starbucks, that's over $7000 a year. I don't have the financial means to support that habit. You need to make sacrifices and cut back on coffee spending, or I will make the sacrifice and cut you out, because the financial stress you're putting me through is putting a serious drain on the relationship.
It's a weird example of an ultimatum, but in my experience, the person giving the ultimatum has usually been the one pushed to the edge and they're at the point where it's make or break, and if you don't want to work on yourself and fix your bad habits, then they will leave.
Obviously, there's much better, healthier ways to go about these issues. Communication goes a long way in a relationship, share your feelings and try to work it out before you hit your boiling point so you don't have to make the ultimatum.
yeah lmao anyone who claims its controlling i feel like 90% they are the red flag and just lack self awareness
Oh facts, I mean it's probably a toxic relationship all around, definitely a stepping stone relationship, hopefully both parties walk away and grow as people
My partner tried this a few times early on in our relationship and saw that I will choose the most trivial thing over them if there's an ultimatum. She doesn't do that anymore. But we were very young so I don't hold it against her.
It's kind of a rule that if somebody makes an ultimatum they are on the losing end of it automatically
Any SO that makes you choose between them or something that makes you happy doesn't deserve to be with you
"It's either me or the cocaine"
Facts, coffee has never let me down lol
So genuine constructive criticism of the comic.
1) I really enjoy the art style
2) the premise of choosing coffee over bf is fine
3) the circumstances which forces the character to choose is not explained. It leaves viewers not saying “heh I can’t live without coffee but can without my bf” but rather “why would he ever say ‘him or coffee’”. The initial premise causes confusion which makes the punchline not hit
(In my opinion obviously)
Edit: I would not be able to tell how to reframe it to be to my humor, but I’m not a comic artist so this is just coming from me as a viewer. I would never claim that what these amazing artists do is easy
Thank you for that. Yeah, i thought about this myself but then its such a silly premise and set up that i went along with it. 😊
What horrible decisions did she make that led to this dumb, DUMB scenario?
Yes, its a dumb scenario
Wow, you managed to work both Coffee Great and Man Bad in one short comic. What a combo. So funny.
Didnt even get a nosebreath out of me
Is this account and comic run by a team or was there only one person making this?
Yay! Normalized Drug Addiction!
the joke is addiction?
The last panel ruins it
Why are most comics in this subreddit absolute trash?
Lovely artstyle!
Thank you! 😊🙏
What is this, the new Cathy?
Drug addiction.
Dude wasn’t very smart
Coffee didn’t leave me at the restaurant staring old cold chicken for two hours, KYLE.
User deleted comment
13d
Moderator removed comment
13d
Anybody who gives you the ultimatum of "me or ____" is always who you should vote against. No exceptions.
I hope no one will post women and coffee emoji here.
“Coffee keeps me awake, you don’t”
Tea supremacy
Bonehurtingjuice moment
I mean, yeah. If your partner gives you an unreasonable ultimatum then they aren’t being a good partner and you should move on. I mean haha coffeeee
This kind of emotional blackmail might have me consider the coffee even if I didn't like coffee.
I would instantly understand that I didn't know anything about my partner and that I may be better off without, even if the choice is difficult.
IFE
Apparently I missed the entire point of this comic lol I thought it was about how partners that give ultimatums over dumb things are toxic
A boyfriend that makes you choose between you and (insert thing you enjoy here) is not worth picking over (previously mentioned thing you enjoy)
Coffee wouldn't make me choose...
This makes more sense than the bear thing and I actually understand the bear thing.
Agreed lol
At this point I'm pretty sure I'm addicted to caffeine, sooo... Bf has nothing worth keeping around.
and she can just dip her dildo in the coffee so no loss there
Better absorption?
🤭 👍
Narrator “And that’s when her crippling coffee addiction truly spiraled out of control!”
This is me. I've been drinking coffee and loving it since high school. I would be totally okay with an endless supply of coffee and no boyfriend.
would you still love him if he was a cup of coffee?
So, is the coffee made out of bears? 🐻☕️
Yeah, brown bear bean
This isn't even a joke
Its always “I will choose coffee over my husband”, but when I chose computer duster over my wife I’m the bad guy.
This is the worst comic I've seen on this sub, I'm disappointed in you op
Why not get a BF that makes coffee?
Yeah well any ultimatums are gonna get you dumped anyway. Ultimatums in general are either a dick move, or unnecessary. For example if your girlfriend is sleeping with another man it might be reasonable to make an ultimatum, but it’s unnecessary. Don’t make the ultimatum, just leave.
the funny part is she’s going to die alone 🤣
Listen, I thought it was cute, but I’m partial to characters drawn with silly little mouths
Moderator removed comment
13d
Seems like too many panels for such a simple joke
why not turn bf into coffee?
Boyfriends amirite??
i agree coffee is the better choice human flesh does not taste that good
Sokka-Haiku by Nightmare2448:
I agree coffee
Is the better choice human
Flesh does not taste that good
Remember that one time Sokka accidentally used an extra syllable in that Haiku Battle in Ba Sing Se? That was a Sokka Haiku and you just made one.
If he’s that upset about coffee, imagine how he’d feel about her cheating! Good choice; lose seemingly toxic bf, gain hot brown morning potion
That super easy; not the thing forcing an ultimatum
My late husband would have loved this comic.
My condolences 😞
What
why did teeth suddenly appear in the last panel
was there teeth in the coffee
Okay Millennial.
Is it just me or do these comics always seem like there's something funny about to happen but then it doesn't happen?
Nah, we all agree with the choice. The question is what strange series of events led to her boyfriend demanding that she choose between him and coffee?
I’m assuming it makes her poop her pants all day long.
That would be hilarious (and would make me fall in love with her even more). She just really loves coffee is all 😞
I mean that's a pretty stupid request from a partner NGL. What's the boundaries here? I won't date someone who drinks coffee?
Love the depiction
Thanks! Yeah its a silly premise for sure 😂
Haha boyfriend worthless
A slave to the brown bean
My bf would pick the same lol, I don’t drink it but he lives on the stuff
She chose...
Wisely...
💪☕️
This is the new version of the old boomer joke "wife bad"
I regret unmuting this subreddit 🤢🤢🤢
Now this is a millennial comic if I’ve ever seen one
Who tf even makes such ultimatums?
Wow this so #relatable! 😂😂😂😂
You fool! You pick the boyfriend because he can be used to source you more coffee when you're in a jam! Smh
Addiction shouldn’t win over love
So ill take the bf...
You dont like coffee?! Lol
The equivalent of GF vs Beer
I’d probably choose coffee too
I don't get coffee obsession. It tastes awful. I've never tasted anything more awful than coffee, even with sugar and milk. It contains way too much caffeine and messes with your sleep cycle greatly. For me it's almost as absurd as a smoking addiction.
I drink coffee, my wife doesn't.
She would never put me in this position.
(Few days later)
ZephRyder’s wife: “honey, you have a decision to make—“
LOL! That would be a short, funny conversation
Ah yes, glorifying addiction
This is sad.
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