I 36M am quite successful in my career and my wife, Adelaide 35F is a SAHM to our four children: 11, 9, 6, 2. A few weeks ago, Adelaide was considerably injured in a hit and run accident. I used up all of my leave to help her with the house and children. She was still having trouble keeping everything up and a coworker’s wife who is also a SAHM offered to watch ours while I’m at work until she recovers from her injuries. We’ve been paying her for her time and food for the kids.
We celebrated the Fourth of July early and a bunch of our friends and family came over, including my SIL Alexia 33F. Adelaide and Alexia are not close try to avoid each other but we invited her because she has two kids 10, 8 who like to play with ours. Alexia works long hours as a nurse because her and her husband can’t afford to live off of one income and has made several snide remarks to Adelaide such as “Must be nice getting to sit around on her ass all day and not work” or “What was the point of going to college anyway? You just wasted your time and husband’s money.” We’ve tried talking to her, telling her to shut up, etc but nothing has worked so Adelaide just tries to keep her distance
I guess Alexia heard about us leaving the kids with my coworker’s wife temporarily and she said that Adelaide is nothing but a trophy wife dumping off the kids. Adelaide heard her and gave her a dirty look so I pulled her aside and scolded her saying that Adelaide is not just a trophy wife and to stop saying that. We’re “dumping off the kids” because she can’t pick them up due to her injuries. Alexia doubled down and said she’s being a gold digger and told her to get out of my house because she was not going to come in and talk shit about my wife.
My in laws are giving me hell about this saying that Alexia is family and family should love one another. I don’t care if she’s family or not, Adelaide is my wife and I’m not going to let people disrespect her in her own home. She is not a gold digger, she may not have to go to work but she still has to put in work. She isn’t the most organized person in the world but she goes above and beyond to make sure house isn’t a health hazard, the kids are well attended to, and dinner is ready or not far from being ready when I get home from work. Her work is just as important as mine so was I wrong for kicking Alexia out?