User deleted post
Wait. They didn’t know that was the weekend you had already planned to be far far away for a thing that you can’t change?
Yes hello UN Peacekeepers? I'd like to report a war crime
😂😂😂😂😂 CC: THE HAGUE
BCC: Amal Clooney
That BCC was nice of you. She doesn’t deserve the inevitable “reply all” mess. 🤪
🤣🤣
I'm having a panic attack at the mere idea of this!!!
Someone I know did this to me once. They decided they were going to stay with me despite me saying it wasn't a good time. I was super poor and stressed out at the time and they were on full vacation mode. At least they were nice and brought a gift. Cooked us a meal, too. Very tasty.
Oddly when they left - we couldn't find that gift anywhere. Guess they could tell how put out we were at their visit and just took the gift back because - we weren't good enough hosts? I dunno.
They've since ghosted me and I'm trying not to let it bug me.
That sucks and a curse upon their house. What was this marvelous gift?
Some specialty preserved meats. Sigh.
Boundaries. Learn them. You gotta say no if you’re not comfortable with people inviting themselves over…
I know. Thank you. I think you helped me realize that these must be people who find it fun/exciting/wonderful to have someone surprise visiting/staying over. I just don't live in a world like that. But it is someone I love that will be visiting so I'm gonna ask everyone involved with this to "please talk to me before buying tickets next time, because I want to help plan this so we can make the most of it together."
how much of a notice are they giving you? are they flying in this weekend?
Wouldn’t matter how much I loved them, this would piss me off.
Oh god who does this!!?!?!
This is an actual recurring nightmare that I have
ding dong
🫨🫨🫨
That's not a gift. Don't answer the door. Get called away on an emergency. Anything.
you don't have to participate.
Ewwwww WTF indeed!
That’s beyond rude. Say no
Oh my god I self destruct if someone shows up unannounced to say hi god forbid they don’t leave
RIGHT
A surprise flight to you?! Hell to the no.
New phobia unlocked??
Yeah this flagged my anxiety!
Happy Cake Day! 🎂
Ooooo thank you!!
My mom tried to do this to us for my daughters first birthday. She decided we were obviously hosting a party on her bday at our house for them to attend and texted me a few weeks before to let me know she and my stepdad had booked a couple nights at a B&B to visit for the weekend.
But we had already made plans to go to a big family gathering on my dad's side, because all my siblings were going and it was a big Canada day party with fireworks and we thought hey that's perfect we can just bring some cupcakes and call it a birthday party too.
When I told my mom she absolutely lost her shit on me about my dad not deserving to get to spend the actual day with my daughter. Even though 1 year old literally could care less about birthdays. We had a huge fight and I didn't talk to my mom for an entire year.
Eventually had to go contact altogether and it took me way too long to get there, but there's more than just that one reason why.
BPD mom by any chance? Yikes. (Daughter of a BPD mom here, hence the q)
I think it's possible but she's not diagnosed. Probably adhd at least, from having been raised by her I could see BPD, it might be her trauma but she fits covert narcissist too
I mean, some moms are just undiagnosed jerks too 😬
LOL also true! I am 100% certain she is undiagnosed but something. She has some trauma that explains things too. But that hasn't made it easier to have a relationship with her. I can accept the why of her behaviour, but I can't accept how she treats me, and my husband.
That makes me want to throw up.
I knew someone who planned to do that to my bridal shower. Yeah, the level of emotions you’re feeling are valid. It’s fucked up and they didn’t even make it to town. Yours did and that’s a bigger punch in the face. My heart goes out to you, I’m sorry.
I only let them in if they also gonna surprise clean my house and make me dinner.
I really really hate surprises.
I’m so bad with unexpected people in my home space
This sounds like a particularly vicious kind of lovebombing 🤨
I surprised my friend on her birthday with her boyfriend who had moved to Texas. But I would not surprise just anybody. You gotta read the room and personality. But I admit I just assumed she'd love it. So I feel a wincy sympathy for the people who talked themselves into it. But also we were like 22. Which feels like the sort of age where that kind of stunt can fly.
Ya still friend with this friend? I kid. I kid.
Omg noooooooo i would DIE
Also - this is why I fucking hate FaceTime. You’re just trying to pop up in my house? You have no idea how feral I am on the day to day in my cave lol
Ugh video chat makes me batshit. Who wants to hold their phone like that for that long?
sounds like you have plans for that weekend already. sucks for them.
I’d be like “omg! So sorry but I got covid and gastro! I poop a little every time I cough! Pls stay away. Find a hotel! Don’t want to get you sick too!!” ..And just hole up in the house and avoid them. Let them learn a lesson in planning!
Eugh nooooo
Oh my gosh that’s some kind of punishment. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
well, some people don't even show up to a planned one let alone surprising :(
That is aggressive and terrible!
Obviously an NT who may be well intentioned. But nope. No thank you please.
Even if NT, presuming OP doesn’t already have plans and just.. doing this?? Rude all around
I would flip out.
Hahahahahahahahaahahah. Eliminate them from your life.
Sounds terrible. Tell them you have plans that weekend (to be alone).
I literally just felt my chest tighten just reading this lol prayers up for you, friend 🙏 but hey, panic cleaning motivation? 🤷♀️
My brother invited himself over and he then looked at me and was like “what do you have planned?” Told him i had nothing bc of the short notice and since he invited himself he was the one who should have a plan not me
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Nooooo tell them they have to find a hotel. I would be totally fine with rearranging plans to have them visit for dinner, going out for drinks one night, etc. But hosting people to stay in my house on short notice without it being an emergency is a NO. You can value the time you get to spend with them while also maintaining your boundaries and living space. They spent money without proper planning. Not your problem.
Girl you stop talking like you’re the strange one for not being ok with this!!! Respectful people don’t think they can just drop in from out of town without even checking to see if you’ll have plans.
Any chance there is a coinciding event at the same time as their trip? Like a “coincidental” thing they wanna go to that just so happens to be going on in your town during the time they’ll be there?
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Who tf does that?? It's a no from me.
I don’t answer a FaceTime from my twin sister without at least an hour warning, WTF!
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