"I mean, sure, you have extreme antisocial personality disorder with violent tendencies.... but have you tried NOT having extreme antisocial personality disorder with violent tendencies?"
"Oh, you have severe depression? Well, I've got this [magic crystal / toxin-purging supplement / magnetic costume jewelry / snake oil / eerie psychic power] that'll fix it right up! What's your credit card number?"
"oh no honey, they're totally all talking mad shit about you behind your back, you should cut contact with that friend group, they're super toxic- oh that was your mother? She's 100% right, maybe you are unlovable and a burden"
"Feeling down? Try cocaine for an instant mood boost!"