So for context I’m (20) and my coworker is like (30). We were really cool for the past few months like really cool. We would always talk to each other and joke. But then a month ago she knows I absolutely hate spiders. She found a dead spider on the floor and she picked it up and chased me for like 30 seconds (which I hated but I didn’t mind) but what really bothered me is right after she THREW the spider at me(luckily it didn’t land on me). And all my coworkers were in the room and they were just in shock she did that. But my coworker was literally laughing hysterically. She was the only one laughing in the room. And when one of my coworkers said to apologize. She said sorry… that you couldn’t take it and again she was the only one laughing in the room. And ofc I was mad she knows that I hate spiders. And we haven’t talked since. So again am I childish/dramatic for not talking to her without her apologizing for doing that?
Am I childish for not talking to my coworker again till she apologizes?
Yes
I think it's more nuanced than that. I wouldn't want to talk to her either after that. But the truth is, not talking to her isn't going to magically make her realize anything. You could try talking to her and tell her how you feel and that you want an apology, but she'll probably just put it on you for not taking a joke or give a fake apology. It's okay to keep things purely professional with her and skip the friend vibes.
As someone who's afraid of spiders, imagine chasing them with something they're afraid of then throwing it at them. The person doing that is the childish one.
I think she sounds incredibly childish but yeah, refusing to talk to someone until they apologize is also childish. I'd just not talk to her beyond work stuff bc wtf.
Yes.
You should go to HR, report her, and get her written up! There were plenty of witnesses. Fuck people that don't respect you or understand what a phobia is.
You’re at work. Be professional.
Not at all. I like to joke and prank, but there is a limit and she pushed way past yours, and her apology was not an apology. But whether she apologizes or not I'd keep my distance from her.
Sulking is childish.
Yes. Coworkers are coworkers, not your mom after she won’t let you pierce your ears.
Yes, I do believe it to be childish.
Has she wronged you? Yes, absolutely.
Was she completely in the wrong and did she act in a completely inappropriate and far more childish manner? Yes, absolutely.
With all that said, do not keep hatred in your heart. By this, I mean if you are troubled because someone may have slighted you, then you should not keep it inside, but instead confront the person and let it be known. Otherwise, what started as small irritation would just fester, and grow and grow, into hatred.
So, I would recommend that you speak to her in private and calmly explain to her how you feel about the situation. How she responds is up to her, but you would have done your part.
Well if she did that, she shouldn’t care that you don’t talk to her. She’s a bad freind
I mean its maybe a little childish yea but frankly i dont think you miss out on a lot if you dont talk to ur coworker no more.
I mean really? Thats disgusting on so many levels man the poor spider why would you throw a living creature possibly killing it, at someone ESPECIALLY when you know the person is scared off these creatures. Imagine what kind of lowlife you need to be.
Sickens me to think about that.
🕷 I’m coming for u in ur sleep
Screw her man. Look for a way to get even tenfold them never speak to her again.
Wait, she’s the one who’s 30?